Work Text:
Choi Jongho, the youngest member of the all-boy Korean Pop group Ateez, intently studied the Memphis, Tennessee attraction pamphlet that he had been holding in his hands for the past ten minutes.
Skimming over the English words in his head, he looked at attraction after attraction, wishing almost desperately that they would have had enough downtime to be able to enjoy the places that they were travelling to.
So far though, this tour was all go, go, go, and very little play. Normally this would fine for Jongho because his body was so busy that his mind was able to go numb. But now he wanted a break. Jongho was really tired these days and was in severe need of a break from the every day tour life.
After their latest comeback , it felt as though the group had not had a lot of downtime to just…breath and relax, the energy was always fast-paced and intense.
The older members had been overly-affectionate towards their youngest member since the lip-synching accusations online came to the surface, and while he appreciated their love and support, they were also suffocating him.
How could he bring himself to tell them that?
How could he bring himself to be that cruel to them when they loved him and cared about him so much?
He knew that for the variety shows and their fan shows, his persona could be cold and uncaring, but in reality that was not the case at all. Jongho felt deeply, he had just become good at hiding his emotions in front of those he was not close with. Emotions tended to make him nervous and uncomfortable but that did not mean that he did not FEEL things at all, contrary to what was often believed about him.
Jongho sighed and ran his hand through now-blue hair. Putting his elbow on his knee and his chin in his hand, he leaned forward to focus back on the pamphlet before him.
Jongho had been working really hard on his English lessons for the past few months and he was fairly confident in the translation of the words before him.
The Ateez members were currently on their North America tour and were stopped in Memphis, TN for the night. On the way into the hotel, Jongho had seen the pamphlet stand and while their manger was checking them in, he found himself wondering over to it and skimming all of the different ones. San had noticed Jongho’s fascination with the little booklets and had extracted himself from Wooyoung’s death grip around his waist and pushed his best friend off on Yeosang, his other best.
“What are you looking at?” San asked curiously, peeking over Jongho’s shoulder. “Attractions of Memphis, Tennessee,” San read out loud in his almost perfect English. “That sounds interesting.” San said, his interest peaked.
Jongho shrugged and picked up the biggest pamphlet.
“I was thinking about taking this back to the room and trying to read it, you know, as practice.”
San nodded seriously, “That’s a great idea Jongie!”
“Hey guys, come on!” Hongjoong yelled over to them, waving them forward to join the group.
Jongho snatched the pamphlet and went to find his room.
Jongho flipped through the pages but his gaze kept coming back to the building that they called The Pyramid. The booklet said that it was a Bass Pro shop.. whatever that was.
Jongho pulled picked up his phone off of the table and clicked on his search Engine and typed in the information to see what would pop up.
“The Bass Pro shop sat at the pyramid, holds a vast assortment of outdoor gear.
The mega store includes a:
Grand hotel
600,000 gallons of water features
A cypress swamp with 100-foot-tall trees
An interactive National Water fowling Heritage Center’ and
A breathtaking glass-floored cantilevering observation deck at the top of the 32-story steel pyramid.
Bass Pro Shops at the Pyramid house dynamic feature across an expansive 535,000-square-foot space, including: -
A giant cypress swamp environment with ponds, alligator pools and duck aviaries
Ten aquariums with 600,000 gallons of water and more than 1,800 fish
Big Cypress Lodge,
A grand, full-service 104-room hotel with treehouse cabins, banquet rooms and spa
The largest assortment of waterfowl and related hunting equipment ever assembled
Unique specialty shops such as the Beretta Gallery that will offer customers premium grade firearms, custom fittings
An interactive wetlands and waterfowl education museum
Uncle Buck’s Fishbowl and Grill, a nautical-themed restaurant with a saltwater aquarium
13 lane bowling alley that offers a chance to bowl ‘in the ocean” amid under-water scenery and ball returns that resemble shark sharks and alligators
The Lookout, a restaurant, bar and massive aquarium situated at the apex of the Pyramid, 300 feet above the Mississippi River .
Additional entertainment areas include:
An arcade
Billiard room
And pistol and archery ranges.”
Jongho’s eyebrows raised in surprise and his mouth dropped open wide.
‘This place sounds really cool.’ He thought to himself, re-reading the information on the website again.
“I could see an alligator in person? That’s so freaking cool!’
Jongho groaned and sunks down into the chair, thumbing through the pictures of the Pyramid.
Jongho’s phone dinged and the notification on his phone showed that Matz, Ateez’s two eldest members, was starting a LIVE.
Looking out of the window and seeing the sun high in the sky, he was surprised at how early they were doing the LIVE.
“They really should be resting while they can, there’s no need for them to be doing this LIVE right now, it’s ridiculous when they need sleep."
He said aloud to himself, thankful that he was rooming alone and was able to express his inner thoughts without having to worry or offending someone else.
Jongho loved making content for Atiny and doing LIVES, but not at the detriment of their health. There had to eventually be a line drawn or they were all going to start sinking down into depression and illness.
Jongho sighed and clicked on the notification, deciding that he might as well watch it since he had nothing else to do in the stupid hotel.
Flopping onto the bed on his stomach, he grabbed on of the pillows and propped it under his chin, turning the volume up so he could hear the LIVE.
“ATINY! HI OUR ATINY!” Hongjoong said loudly and excitedly, causing Seonghwa to flinch away laughingly.
To the outside eye it would look like Hongjoong was full of energy but Jongho knew that underneath the exuberance, it was straight up exhaustion causing their Leader to be so amped up. Jongho furrowed his brows at the sight and decided to watch the comments coming in, instead.
Jongho had only watched the comments for a few second before he saw one that made his blood run cold.
“Jongho can’t sing. His singing is awful and all he does is lip-synch anyway."
Jongho watched in shock as several other comments came in like that one. Online rumors had spread over the past few months of Jongho lip-synching in all of their performances, which was utterly untrue and anyone with eyes could tell.
Jongho worked so hard in vocal training every single day, he worked his ass off in every rehearsal and gave his all for every performance.
Jongho knew that he shouldn’t pay attention to the haters and the trolls but lately it had just been so much, so much negative energy was being focused on him and it made him sad and feel ass though he was not doing a good enough job.
Normally he would not pay attention to the shit being said, maybe it was his exhaustion that was making him feel so moody and emotional about it.
He turned his attention back to the LIVE and realized that both Matz looked aggravated, he couldn’t figure out why until Hongjoong leaned really close to the camera.
“I want to make the official statement that our maknae, Choi Jongho, has never lip-sung in ANY of our performances. He works hard to be able to sound as amazing as he does and to keep that up for our Atiny. Anyone else saying anything different is spreading false rumors, false information and are not true Atinys. If I ever see these comments again in the LIVE then the person commenting them will be immediately blocked."
Hongjoong sat back in his chair, arms crossed with a disgruntled look on his face. Seonghwa had nodded the entire time that Hongjoong had spoken.
Jongho felt his eyes start to tear up and he rubbed the heel of his hand against him eyes.
Jongho sat up on the bed and felt his anxiety begin to rise. It was too much. It was all too much right now. He looked around the room in panic, feeling the walls starts to close in on him.
Without even really thinking it through, Jongho grabbed his wallet, the American money stash that he was given at the beginning of the tour, his favorite baseball cap, the pamphlet and headed out.
~*~
Jongho cautiously climbed into the Uber, not having ordered one on his own before.
His driver nodded at him and said hello and thankfully kept quiet after that, allowing the calm jazz music to waft around the car. Jongho leaned his head back against the headrest and closed his eyes, the pounding in his head slowly fading along with his racing pulse.
It only took about twenty minutes before they were pulling into the large parking lot for the Pyramid.
Jongho stared out on the window in awe at how huge the pyramid was. It passed even what he had thought it would be.
He thanked the driver, unbuckled his seat belt and climbed out of the car.
Pulling his cap lower on his head, Jongho turned his phone on silent and started walking towards the building. As he walked up the steps, he leaned back to take in the enormity of the Pyramid. The building looked as though it would go on forever.
*Thwack*
Jongho jumped back in surprise, his foot catching on the edge of the step causing him to almost fall backwards.
The hand of the person he had run into, flew out and grabbed his wrist to steady him. Jongho put his hand over his chest his heart caught in his throat.
“Thank you, I’m so sorry I ran into you like that.””
“No, no, it was completely my fault! I turned around and slammed into you.” Said a beautiful voice.
Jongho raised his head and if front of him was one of the most beautiful women he had ever seen. The woman had long and extremely curly hair, the shade of a burnt orange, big brown eyes full of depth and a smattering of freckles across her round cheeks and cute upturned nose.
“I-I-I..” Jongho tried to talk but all that came out was a stutter.
The woman giggled behind her hand, her cute nose crinkling. ‘
'Adorable..’ Jongho found himself thinking.
“Hi, I’m Talia! You..uh..you’re not my blind date, are you?” She asked while peering into his eyes. Jongho blushed and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand.
“I’m Jongho… and no.. no I’m not.”
“Jongho? That’s an interesting name, I like it!” Talia said with a bright smile. “I figured you weren’t my blind date, I was just hoping you were so I wouldn’t have to face reality that I have been stood up.” Talia shrugged and pushed her thick hair behind her shoulder.
“Ah, I’m sorry you’ve been stood up.” Jongho said sincerely, wondering how anyone could have even thought to stand up the woman before him.
Talia smiled and waved her hand in the air, waving off his apology.
“It’s perfectly fine! I can still have fun without him,” she grinned. “I’m still going to go look at the alligators and I’m so excited to ride the glass elevator all the way to the top!”
Jongho felt his eyes bulging, “A GLASS ELEVATOR? TO THE TOP?!”
Talia giggled at him and nodded her head,“Yeah! It’s supposed to be completely see-through.”
"Wow…” Jongho said in reply.
The conversation died down and he started to feel a little awkward. Jongho cleared his throat but Talia beat him to talking,
“Hey… if you don’t have anyone to explore the place with… what if we do it together?”
Jongho felt excitement start to build in his stomach and he had to tell himself to act calm.
“Together? Us?”
Talia nodded again. “Yeah, if you’re okay with that? I just thought it would be fun since we are basically best friends now.”
Jongho found himself grinning at her teasing and nodded, smiling his gummy smile. “That sounds really great, I would love to!”
Jongho and Talia walked inside of the Pyramid and Jongho immediately didn’t know where to look. Together, they walked past the entrance, paused in their steps and craned their necks to look all the way up to the roof.
“Woooow….” They said in unison before looking at each other and laughing.
“Come on!” Talia said, grabbing Jongho’s hand and pulling him forward.
Jongho found himself following after a complete stranger. Their first stop was by the huge fish tank wall that had a built in waterfall.
“Ohhhh! Jongho! Look at that monsterous catfish!” Talia squealed and dropped his hand in her excitement, getting as close as she possibly could to the glass without actually touching it.
Talia’s excitement was infectious and Jongho found himself getting excited over seeing this fish as well.
“Look at this one,” Jongho pointed to one of the fish who had scars down it’s body.
“Oohhh the poor baby,” Talia had cooed, “I wonder what happened to him. I hope he wasn’t getting bullied by the other fish,” she said and turned a glaring eye upon the tank.
Jongho shuffled uncomfortably, rememebr the reason that he ran away from the hotel to begin with. Looking around to distarct himself, Jongho noticed the large glassed in area, housing the alligators.
“Talia… want to go see the alligators?” Talia whipped her head around, guilty at being caught making kissy fish faces at the tank and Jongho laughed at her expression as a blush krept up her cheeks.
“Hang on, before we go over there, would you mind taking a picture of me in front of the tank?” Jongho nodded and lifted Talia’s phone up. She posed in a ridiculous way, sticking her tongue out and making the peace sign. Jongho snapped the picture and she ran over to look at it.
“It’s perfect! Thank you!”
Jongho had a moment of nervousness thinking that she would ask for a photo of him and then he would have to come clean about being an Idol and why he couldn’t take any pictures right then. Instead, Talia took his hand again and started pulling him towards the Alligator exhibit.
Stopping in from of the bridge to get to the alligator glass, they realized there was all sorts of bridges and walkways that were over literal swamp-like water pools that were INSIDE the store.
“Whoa..so neat.” Talia said and started walking onto the bridge. Instead of going straight to the alligators.
They decided to walk around the bridges and pathways for a while. They looked at the boats the store had parked in the water, at the huge fish that were swimming underneath them and the ducks that were lazily floating.
One duck took a particular liking to Talia and tried following her around, much to her delight. However, when Jongho would step close to Talia, the duck would quack angrily and flap around, nibbling on Jongho’s shoes.
“I think the duck likes you Jongho,” Talia said teasingly.
The duck lashed out and nipped at Jongho’s ankles and Jongho narrowed his eyes at Talia, “Sure seems that way to me too.” He said in a jokingly threatening way.
Talia bent down and shooed the duck along the bridge. “Go on Mr. Duck, we are going to the alligators and you don’t need to be over there, they might eat you!”
Almost, as if the duck realized what she was saying, he gave one last threatening quack at Jongho and then shuffled his way back into the water. Jongho shook his head at the ridiculousness and followed Talia to the alligators.
The alligators were very impressive but also very boring. They were like seeing a dinosaurs in real life.
Jongho was impressed with the size of the scaly beasts but he and Talia moved on quickly, seeing as that the alligators were not moving an iinch from where they were.
Talia pointed over Jongho’s head and he turned to see the glass elevator coming down to the floor.
"It really IS completely see-through!” They looked at each other and in unison said, “Let’s go”
They had to sign a release waver just to get on the elevator and thankfully it was just the two of them. The elevator jerked and then started moving upward, slowly, allowing them to be able to see the entire Pyrmaid from where they were standing.
Jongho looked out of glass with excitement and when he looked down and could see straight through the bottom, he stomach turned in adrenaline. He loved things like this!
Jongho was so lost in his thoughts that it took him a minute to realize that there was weird breathing coming from beside him. Looking over to Talia, he realized that she had her eyes screwed shut, sweat was beading her forehead and she was trying to do breathing control exercised.
“Talia?” Jongho asked questioningly.
Talia jerked at his voice and she lifed a shaky hand to fix here hair, but never opened her eyes.
“Hey… are you okay?” He asked coming closer to her.
She nodded but then the elevator jerked again and she collapsed into his chest. Jongho’s arms automatically went around her and she buried her face in his chest., her fingers digging into his shirt.
“I’m so sorry..” she whispered, “I thought I- I thought I could control my f-fear of heights.” Jongho just pulled her tighter into his arms and allowed her to rest her head on his shoulder.
"It’s okay, I understand. I’m proud of you for trying to face them, that takes courage and strength.”
Talia hiccupped and shook her head, “I’m definitely not brave, at all. Ugh!” I’m sorry to be a party-pooper”
Jongho stroked her hair, his fingers snagging gently into her curls and she closed her eyes at the comforting sensation.
Once the elevator opened, Talia leaped from his arms and onto solid ground, looking back sheepishly at him as he walked over the threshold with no issues.
They explored the top level and went Jongho went out onto the clear glass balcony, Talia hung back and said that she would grab them a table in the top floor restaurant.
Jongho walked to the railing over the clear glass and let out a huge sigh when he reached the railing. From this vantage point he could see all of the city and all of the local river. He looked up into the bright blue sky and felt a tear slowly roll down his cheek. He took a deep breath and calmly wiped the tear away from his face. He breathed in deeply and reveled in the feeling of the warm sun against his skin. Peace. That’s what he felt standing on this see-through glass, 70 plus stories in the air. He felt peace.
Jongho turned around and slowly made his was back into the restaurant. Over the next two hours, Jongho and Talia talked non-stop about anthing and everything.
Jongho found himself thoroughly enjoying her company and laughing more than he had in months. When asked what he did for a living, Jongho finally told her.
He didn’t know what he was expecting but Talia nodding thoughtfully and saying, “I bet that can be really hard,” had Jongho feeling seen. And he liked that.
Jongho finally looked at his phone and realized that his phone had been blowing up with calls and texts from his managers and band mates, all looking for him. Jongho sighed and Talia raised an eyebrow.
“It looks like they discovered that I went missing… I guess I need to go back now.”
Talia nodded sadly and they headed back to the elevator.
This time, Talia automatically hid her face in Jongho’s shoulder and she wasn’t nearly as terrified.
Before they left the building, Jongho stopped by the outlet store and bought gifts for all of his Hyungs.
A handmade journal and pencil for Hongjoong,
A Lego fishing boat for Seonghwa,
a book of Southern American cooking for Wooyoung,
A historical book on pyramids and ancient Egypt for MIngi, Camouflage fighting gloves for Yeosang,
A hand carved wooden fishing pole for Yunho
For San he bought the biggest stuffed Alligator toy that they had, along with a book about American Alligators.
Talia walked with Jongho to the door and look curiously at all of his bags.
“You sure care a lot about your friends, that’s really sweet Jongho.”
He blushed and slowly took one of the bags and handed it to Talia who looked at it in surprise.
“What’s this?” she asked.
“It’s for you, to thank you for the great day that I had today. It wasn’t very long but I definitely needed it and you made today even more worth it.”
Talia opened the bag and gasped as she pulled out a Duck stuffed animal that looked just like the one that followed her around. Talia smiled brightly and hugged the duck to her chest. She stepped forward and threw her arms around Jongho.
“Today was amazing for me as well. I’m glad my date stood me up,” she said and they both laughed.
“Also,” Jongho added, “I’m definitely NOT supposed to do this but.. if you download this app, this is my number and.. I was thinking we could message sometime… if you want to.” Jongho scratched the side of his face, nervous tic.
Tali blushed and Jongho felt his heart beating out of his chest at how cute she was.
“I… I would definitely like that.” She whispered as she looked up into his eyes.
They stared deeply into each other’s eyes, slowly leaning towards each other. Their lips almost touched when Jongho’s phone started going crazy again. They pulled back quickly, and Talia giggled nervously.
“Well.. Jongho.. I guess I’ll message you later.” Talia said.
She leaned up suddenly, kissed him softly on the cheek and took off walking down the stairs quickly. Jongho stared after her in shock and then started laughing, his fingertips caressing where she had kissed. .
~*~
Jongho arrived back at the hotel about an hour later, the traffic a lot worse than it had been.
His arms laden with bags, he snuck into the elevator and snuck to his hotel room, hoping that he could get in and pretend to have just fallen into a deep sleep. Struggling to get the keycard out of his pocket with his hands full, he finally managed it and was just about to swipe it when the door opeend, a huge hand grabbed his wrist and he was yanked inside.
Jongho stumbled into the room and looked guiltily at his band mates who were piled on his bed and sitting in the chairs in the rooms.
“Jongho… where have you been?” Hongjoong asked quietly, staring the younger man down.
Normally Jongho didn’t get intimidated by his small Leader but today.. today the waves of anger and concern were rolling off of him. Jongho’s shoulders slouched and he stared down at his shoes, he could feel hot tears evading his eyes and escaping down his face.
Immediately in alarm, Wooyoung jumped up and threw his arms around the maknae. “It’s okay Jongie! We aren’t too mad, mainly worried more than anything.”
The others nodded and he felt Yunho’s large hands settle onto his shoulders, gently pushing him to the chair that Wooyoung had vacated. Hongjoong stood up and walked over to the younger man, squatting down in front of him and taking Jongho’s hands in his smaller ones. When Jongho didn’t pull away, they immediately knew that something was off. Hongjoong and Seonghwa exchanged glances and Seonghwa, who acted like the mother of the group, came to squat down beside their Leader.
“Jongho… tell us what’s going on. You know that we are always here for you.”
“Yeah, Mingi said, “You can talk to us about anything.”
Their kindness was too much after realizing that how worried he had made them and Jongho broke down into tears, sobbing hard as Seonghwa pulled Jongho forward and into a huge hug. The group looked at one another in absolute shock but no one seemed to move or know how to respond.
Seonghwa stroked Jongho’'s hair until he calmed down and the tears subsided. Jongho wiped his runny nose with a tissue that Yeosang had handed him and he nodded at them.
“You guys are right.. I .. should have talked to you all sooner. I’m sorry that I made you worry today. I’m sorry that I left without telling anyone. I… I DO have things that I want, no.. that I NEED to talk about. I-if you would be willing to listen."
Everyone nodded their head.
“Of course Jongho, whatever you need.” Hongjoong said supportively.
Jongho nodded and took in a deep breath.
“But first, “ he said, “I bought presents for everyone!”
“OH MY GOD PRESENTS FROM OUR MAKNAE!” Wooyung cheered and everyone began to laugh, the tension fizzling out of the room.
~*~
Later that night while lying in bed, Jongho’s phone buzzed. When he looked at it, there was a friend request on the messaging app from a DuckingTalia.
Jongho laughed so loud when he saw the name that her snorted. He accepted the request and Immediately sent a message
JonghoOnTpop:Hello DuckingTalia, How the duck are ya?” Immediately the reply came through,
DuckingTalia :I’m doing ducking great!
Jongho smiled, happy that she was pleased with his ridiculous joke. He saw that she was typing again.
DuckingTalia: So I looked up some of your group’s live performances
Jongho fel this stomach drop, knowing what other people were currently saying about him. He quickly scanned the rest of the message.
DuckingTalia :. Your groups performances are AMAZING. I haven’ watched too many, but I did want to say this. YOUR VOALS ARE AMAAZING! OH MY GAWD! You’re like a vocal deity or something! The range! The pitch! The gorgeousnes of your everything! Talk about swooning!”
Jongo could feel another blush taking over his entire face, surprised at how relieved he was that she seemed to not only enjoy his performances, but also know that they are real.
JonghoOnTpop: "thank you, I’m glad you like them” he sent back, sinking down into his bed to get comfortsble for the long night of messaging that he sensed ahead of him.