Chapter Text
A few blueish petals fall on his hands. It’s still tolerable, for now, but he can sense this will quickly become a pain in the ass – or rather, the throat. He wipes his mouth with a flick of the sleeve, just in case some more petals would still be sticking there. He doesn’t know a lot about flowers, but he recognizes the petals; it’s from forget-me-nots. That is a new, he can’t remember last time he saw some, before he started to cough them.
He lifts his chin up and turns his head to look at the sky, through the big windows. For once, the weather is gloomy, and it could start raining any time soon. Lucky for him, he doesn’t have to go back to his home tonight.
The buzzing sound of the bloodflies brings him back from his thoughts, and he looks at the nests just a few meters away. A clockwork soldier slices one in two, before throwing an electrostatic discharge around it as some bugs are trying – in vain – to damage it. He has to admit, Alexandria had a good idea on this one, he’ll have to talk about it to the Royal Family. Talking about her, she comes closer to him, her hands behind her back.
“Thank you for helping me with this, Kirin” she says with a gentle smile on her face. Kirin crosses his arms on his chest, smiling back.
“Of course, anything to keep my brilliant inventions a while longer. I wouldn’t have missed the chance.”
Alexandria lets out a cackle. Obviously, he accepted the offer more for himself than for her. Kirin barely does anything for anyone, after all.
“However, I think I should update them a bit” he continues. “Why not with something that breathes fire? Anyway, you caught me off guards with your request, I didn’t have the time to think about anything yet.”
“I must confess, I wasn’t expecting to say this one day, but I’m glad you still got a few of your soldiers. I thought Corvo destroyed them all.”
Hearing his name makes him shiver, and at the same time, some petals try to go up his throat and out of his mouth. He swallows them back, not wanting to spit them in front of Alexandria. She turns her head to him.
“Is everything alright?”
And he looks down at her.
“Yes, everything’s alright.”
It’s been a few days now he keeps coughing petals, but this is more than just a simple disease, he can’t quite grasp its origin, not in a scientific way at least. He would have loved to dissected the victim, to try to resolve the mystery around it, if only it wasn’t himself. How could someone start coughing flowers, after all?
It all started right after Anton, Corvo and Meagan’s departure to Dunwall. Though he couldn’t have the time to think about it much that Alexandria would already come asking for help at Addermire, to get rid of the remaining bloodflies. It’s supposed to be the guard’s duty, but no one dares to approach those monsters, only a fool like Corvo would do such a thing – either it is stupidity or bravery. And with that, Kirin spends his nights there, while the invasion is still a thing and to be sure everything is going smoothly with the clockwork soldiers. He wants to go to the Conservatory, once the job here is done, he’ll find some answers there if he’s lucky enough.
“You seem more tired than usual. Are you sure you don’t have anything on your mind? You can talk to me about it.”
Kirin lets out a sigh.
“Nothing important.” But she looks down at the floor, only to see the petals at their foot. Kirin follows her gaze, and a shiver runs down his spine. Still, none of them wants to start talking about that, for now.
The clockwork soldier will soon finish its job in this room, and Kirin decides to leave to go check the progress elsewhere. He brought three of them with him, the others stay at the mansion to protect it while he’s gone. And for the other two he brought, things are also going rather well it seems.
Kirin falls on the sofa, in the room with the large view on the main hall. He smokes one puff of tobacco from his fingers, leaving a long grayish trail in the lounge. The night fell quite quickly, and it brought with it the rain. The droplets hammer the windows. Maybe it will stop before he has to leave the place.
He draws his attention to Alexandria, while she sits next to him.
“You missed dinner again.”
“I’m not hungry anyway.”
She sighs, shrugging. She’s used to it, they’ve known each other for a while now. Then, she puts one hand on his arm, worried out of a sudden.
“I didn’t see them fall, but I have the feeling you’ve been followed by forget-me-nots. This is not a common flower in Karnaca, and there weren’t any at Addermire before you came.”
Kirin looks at her right in the eyes. Well, she noticed then. He has no use in trying to hide it from her anymore, and so he doesn’t bother to cough some petals this time.
“It started a bit after Corvo and the others left, right before you came to me actually. It’s still… well, supportable, even if I have no idea where it comes from.”
Alexandria lets go of him and scratches her chin, thinking. Kirin observes her in silence, a strange ball forming at the bottom of his stomach. Every time he thinks about Corvo, he just wants to cough more.
“I think I’ve seen something like this, some years ago. I bet you already thought about visiting the Conservatory, do you mind me coming with you? I’m curious as well to know more about that.”
He nods. Looking for answers will be easier with her help, also the Conservatory’s library is quite big. Alexandria then gets up, with still this worried look on her face.
“In the meantime, I’ll go check if I have some notes about it, in my office. Have a good night” and Kirin returns the courtesy to her before sinking into the sofa. He takes another puff, trying to think about something else. All he can think about is Corvo, and he feels the urge to spit petals once again. This is quite a strange sensation, seeing flowers going out of his mouth like that.
He spends the night in the lounge, doodling many things in his notebook. He doesn’t hear Alexandria getting closer, and jumps out of surprise when she leans in, offering him some bread and an apple.
“You should try to eat, I’m sure you need it” she says with a smile. No really, there wasn’t anyone out there as kind as her – or maybe, Cor- he feels petals going up his throat and swallows them back.
“I couldn’t find much, I must confess” she continues, sitting in front of him. “It seems though some patients caught the disease, and only thing they all shared – besides the petals – were their feelings. I’ve found some briefs mentions about one-sided love. As for the flowers, they were never the same.”
“What you mean is there’s no scientific explanation to this, right?”
“Not yet, at least.” She hesitates for a moment before resuming with a single word: “Corvo?”
Kirin quivers. This gut feeling he had then comes back, and with it, the petals. There is no way Corvo has anything to do about it, isn’t it? He shakes his head to clean up his thoughts.
“I can’t quite see the connection.”
“Sounds obvious enough to me.”
He grimaces.
“Are you implying I might have feelings for him?”
This would just be so ridiculous, but believable at the same time. After all, he thinks about him all the time, lately, and when he does so, his throat fills with petals – though he doesn’t have to cough them every time.
He does like him, but a ‘one-sided love’? Isn’t it a bit too much to say?
Their altercation at the Clockwork Mansion has been quite eventful, him wouldn’t stop teasing Corvo, and the later was sneaking past all the defenses. He snickers at the thought of it. Corvo was old, true enough, but he still is full of surprises, and really well preserved for his age.
After that, he forced him to go on his old ship along him – not really his, in fact. The Dreadful Wale, that miserable boat belongs to Meagan, it was already falling apart before he arrived. There, Corvo and him spent long nights talking, about anything and everything. Kirin bites his lips as he realizes he misses those conversations. It felt nice talking with him, he liked to have him nearby.
And boy, does he hope everything is alright for him right now.
Alexandria smiles softly, and answers with another question: “Do you think I’m wrong?”
Kirin looks away. His ears are starting to burn, alongside his face. Him? Having feelings? The idea seems absurd. Romantic feelings, even? And to whom, Corvo? All of this is utterly ridiculous. He draws his attention back to Alexandria, who is still looking at him with this warm and sweet gaze only she can do.
“I… I need to think about it, I think.”
“Take all the time you need. I can take care of the clockwork soldiers by myself this morning, and I suggest we go check the Conservatory this afternoon. Do you still have the keys?”
He nods quietly. Breanna gave him a double once, so he could come and go as he pleases, while working on the Oraculum. At the time he finished, he didn’t think about giving it back, nor had the chance, actually.
And then, early afternoon, they are on their way to Cyria’s Gardens, escorted by a few guards. Bringing the clockwork soldiers with them would have only drew more attention, this and slow them down. They decided to let them at Addermire for now.
The square in front of the building is empty. Since Breanna Ashworth’s disappearance, it is as if this place became haunted. People dare even less coming by. Only a bunch of guards stand there, laughing about the new rumors. They see Alexandria and Kirin coming closer and let them continue into the Conservatory, not asking anything about their visit.
Inside, it is as empty as outside. Even the witches left, most of them probably went to Dunwall Tower to help Delilah. They won’t complain much about it, it’d be way easier without them.
Kirin starts checking the books on the left, while Alexandria goes for the right of the library. Piles of books lie around the floor, drawing a sigh of exasperation from her. The witches didn’t go easy on messing around with the place. She jumps out of surprise as a bloodfly brushes past her hand to fly away. The Conservatory really deserves a good clean up.
They are searching for a good hour before Alexandria finally finds something. She calls for Kirin, who puts down the book he is holding and comes closer. The two of them sit on the floor.
“The Hanahaki disease, have you heard about it?”
“I’m afraid I haven’t.”
“Well, it is written there the victim starts coughing petals. I think it corresponds to what is happening to you.”
Kirin grabs the book and continues to read.
“The disease develops inside of the lungs, the trachea and the throat. It takes the form of a flower growing over time, blocking more and more the respiratory tract. On average, the patients die in 2 or 3 months if nothing is done.
>The exact origin of the disease remains a mystery, as it is rare and still not well known. Researches are slow. A common trait between all the observed cases seem to indicate it may have a link with roma…”
Kirin pauses for a moment and swallows.
“With romantic feelings. If the victim experiences one-sided love, they are more likely to be contaminated by the disease.”
Alexandria can’t hold back a light smile despite the dramatic situation.
“Some of the patients told that once the person they loved returned their feelings, then the cough calmed before finally disappearing. Last but not least, a few surgeries had been done, in the hope to remove the flowers from the lungs. Just a very little of them succeeded, but each time the patient assure their feelings were gone as well.”
A blank gradually settles between them, and the library becomes silent again. Kirin finally sighs, closes the book and puts it aside, next to him. He leans forward, crosses his fingers, and leans on them with his chin.
It is not the fact it is a deadly disease that devastate him, rather the fact that all this time he tried his best to hide his feelings, and all of this for nothing. This bullshit just exposed to him in full face that he fell in love. What a waste.
“What are you going to do?” asks Alexandria, taking the book. She looks for the pages about the disease to read them again. Maybe she’ll just borrow it, while Kirin is sick. Moreover, there are some notes about the surgery, it could be useful.
“I don’t know” he answers with a murmur. “I’m not so sure about what I should do.”
“Oh, really? I would have bet you’d try the surgery.”
Why would you inflict this to yourself, knowing the fact you consider feelings to be useless? To be a weakness? What are you hoping for?
She turns her head to him, waiting for his answer. Kirin takes a deep breath and gets up.
“Either I live, or it is some kind of fifty-fifty. Or, I simply let myself die. I don’t know… I don’t think I have the slightest chance with… with Corvo, anyway.” The words seem to tear out his throat. He looks away, ashamed, his face red, and resumes: “I’m not even sure yet if I want to talk to him about it.”
“I think it’s worth the try.”
Apart from taking a blow to his self-esteem, he thinks. Alexandria gets up as well, and then they decide to go back to Addermire. The sky is gray, and the weather gloomy. It’s going to rain once more soon enough.