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“Liv, you know I can’t take this case to trial on this evidence.” Rafael sat in his favorite chair in Benson’s office, reviewing case notes as he sipped coffee. It was a tricky case–a victim who had changed her statement twice since the incident took place. While both the ADA and the Lieutenant believed her, proving it would be another matter entirely. “What did the lab say about DNA evidence?”
“They weren’t able to get any from the rape kit,” Benson answered, tossing her glasses on the desk in frustration. “We’re sweeping the scene for fingerprints or other trace evidence, but…”
“But that can be dismissed.” Rafael pursed his lips and considered. “Do we have any other eyewitnesses that can put them together just before the rape?”
“Not that we’ve found so far.” She looked over her notes. “I have Rollins canvassing right now. Maybe she can come up with something we’ve missed.”
“I hope so, Liv,” Barba replied. “The last thing I want is this guy to walk.”
“Me either. He gives me the cr—” She paused when her phone went off, and she picked it up. “It’s Fin. He and Carisi are checking out a lead on another case.” She put the phone to her ear. “Benson.”
Rafael thoughtfully ran over the case notes again, listening with one ear to Olivia’s end of the conversation.
“Wait, what happened?” She glanced up, her gaze fixing on Barba. “How bad is it?”
Brows furrowed with curiosity, Rafael caught her gaze. He placed the folder on her desk and listened more intently.
“Okay,” she said. “I’m with Barba now. We’ll meet him down at Mercy. Grab Rollins and the two of you canvass the neighborhood. Okay, see you soon.” And she hung up the phone.
“Why do I feel like I’m not going to like this?” he asked apprehensively.
“Because you’re not. Carisi was chasing a perp up a fire escape and lost his footing.” She cringed as she stood to gather her coat. “He took a spill and was taken by bus to Mercy. Fin isn’t sure how bad it is, but he did hit his head and it knocked him out.” She paused and looked down at him. “I know you two haven’t been together long, but if you want to go with me to check on him…”
“Yes,” Barba replied instantly, already pushing to his feet. “I need to arrange coverage for an arraignment, but I’m with you.”
Olivia sped along as fast as one could in Manhattan traffic, while Barba tapped quickly on his phone in the passenger seat. “There,” he finally said. “I shoved the arraignment off on some junior ADA.” He glanced at her speedometer. “Are we able to get there any faster?”
She glanced at him with a sympathetic smile. “I’m sure he’s going to be fine.”
“I know,” he said, resting his head back against the headrest. “I just feel…helpless and awkward right now. As you said, we haven’t been together long. I’m worried, but then I’m questioning if that worry is misplaced at this stage.” He shot her a sheepish glance. “And I’m probably overthinking things.”
“It’s obvious you care about Carisi,” Liv replied, gently. “So, it’s okay to be at least a little concerned after he fell off a fire escape and knocked himself out.” She grinned. “I’m not sleeping with him and I’m a little worried.”
Rafael flushed. “Can we not talk about my sex life on our way to the hospital?”
“I’m your best friend,” she retorted on a chuckle. “Who else are you going to talk about your sex life with?”
“I’d prefer no one, except the one I’m having it with,” he shot back, blushing brighter.
Olivia was lucky enough to find a parking spot close to the emergency room when they arrived at Mercy General. She held up her badge as she approached the triage desk. “I’m Lieutenant Benson with Manhattan SVU,” she said to the clerk. “I was told one of my detectives, Dominick Carisi, was brought in.”
“Yes,” the clerk replied. She was young, maybe twenty-two, with blonde hair in a high ponytail. “Give me one sec…” Her eyes scanned over the screen. “Room D7.” She pointed to a corridor behind her. “Two rights and a left.”
“Thanks,” Benson replied, and she and Barba strode purposefully down the hall.
It took them only moments to locate Sonny. “Hey, Carisi,” Liv said as they entered the cubicle. She stepped over to the bed and rested her hands on the rail. “Fin said you took quite a spill.”
“Hey, Lieu,” Carisi replied, a bit drowsily. He peered past her, blinking as he caught sight of Rafael. “Rafi?” he asked. “You came?” He smiled as Barba approached the other side of the bed. “I thought you were in court all day.”
“I was in Liv’s office when Fin called,” Barba replied, surveying Sonny. “You look like hell.”
“My head’s about to explode,” Sonny replied, pinching the bridge of his nose. “My foot, too.”
With a brief glance of hesitation at Benson, Rafael laced his fingers through Sonny’s. “What did the doctor say?”
“Not much, yet.” Carisi squeezed his hand reassuringly. “They’re still running tests. So far, they’ve x-rayed my foot, chest, and back, and did a CT on my head.”
“Did they find anything in there?” Barba asked, innocently.
“You’re hilarious,” Sonny responded with a tired smile. “They said they should have results soon.”
“What happened, Carisi?” Benson asked, pulling over a chair and sitting down.
“To be honest, I’m not sure. One minute I was chasing the guy up the fire escape, and the next I was freefalling.” He shrugged. “I don’t know if the step was wet or what. My feet just flew out.”
Barba sat gingerly on the edge of his bed. “Do you need anything? Water?” He hesitated. “Do you need me to call your parents?”
“Please, God, no,” Sonny said emphatically. “Ma will be down here so fast my head will spin, and I am not up to her cluckin’ like a hen over me right now.”
He was silently relieved. He had not yet met Sonny’s parents, and he didn’t want their first interaction to be him notifying them their son had fallen off a building.
“Mr. Carisi?” spoke up a voice from the door. They all looked up to the petite woman in scrubs and a white coat who had just come in.
“Hey, doc,” Sonny said. “What’s the verdict?”
She hesitated, glancing back and forth between Olivia and Barba.
“I’ll step out for a minute,” Benson said, rose, and strode out.
“…and are you a relative?” The doctor looked to Rafael. “If not, you’ll have to leave, too.”
“He can stay,” Sonny assured the doctor. “He’s my…” He paused, looking searchingly at Rafael. “…boyfriend?”
Barba cringed. “I don’t like that term. We’re grown men. How about ‘partner’?”
Chuckling, Sonny rolled his eyes. “He’s mine.”
The doctor smiled and relaxed. “For as far as you fell and how hard you hit, Mr. Carisi, it could have been a whole lot worse.” She glanced down at the tablet in her hands. “You have a concussion, which is no surprise given you were knocked out. You cracked three ribs, but not badly.” She grimaced. “And you fractured your ankle.”
“Well, shit.”
“Because of the concussion, we’re going to keep you overnight for observation,” she continued. “And you’ll be off work for a few days.”
“Spectacular,” Sonny said with a groan. “And we’re short-handed.”
“Aren’t you always?” Barba asked with a rueful grin.
“We’ll get you into a room for the night so you’ll be more comfortable, and I’ll put in for a consult with ortho to get your foot dealt with.” With a sympathetic smile, the doctor turned and left.
“Well,” Rafael said, “that’ll put a damper on your weekend.”
“No kidding.” Sonny pinched the bridge of his nose and grimaced. “Stupid fire escape.”
“What’s the verdict?” Liv asked as she strode back in. “Will you live?”
“Concussion, cracked ribs, and a broken ankle,” Sonny said. He peered up at her apologetically. “She says I have to be off for at least a few days, Lieu, and I’d imagine light duty after that. I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault, Carisi,” she said, squeezing his arm. “It happens – when we run up fire escapes.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Sonny replied, sighing.
Liv shook her head and turned to Barba. “You have him?”
He nodded. “Absolutely. Go, get with your squad. I’ve got this.” Olivia said her goodbyes and turned to go. “And get me evidence,” Rafael called after her.
She waved over her shoulder and was gone.
He turned to Sonny. “I’ll stay with you tonight, if you want me to.”
“Rafi, you don’t have to do that,” Sonny said, squeezing his hand. “I’ll be fine.” He studied Barba for a moment. “Are you okay?”
He hesitated. “You know how I told you I haven’t been in a long-term relationship in a long, long time?”
Sonny nodded. “Yeah, I remember that.”
“I’m a little out of my depth, here,” he said. “I, um…I didn’t anticipate how seeing you in a hospital bed would impact me, for starters.”
A grin spread over Sonny’s face. “You worried about me?”
Rafael shot him a withering look. “Of course I am! Jesus, Liv gets a call saying you fell off a fire escape and knocked yourself out? I was worried enough that I got some poor junior ADA to cover my arraignments this afternoon.”
The grin widened. “You got someone else to cover your court cases? You must be terrified.”
“Shut up,” he retorted, a flush creeping into his cheeks. “I also don’t want to push for something neither of us is ready for. If you want me to stay, I’m happy to. But if it’s too much…”
With a groan, Sonny pushed himself up to a sitting position. “I always want you here,” he said. “And I’ll be honest, I was real happy when I saw you walk in with Liv. It means a lot that you came.”
He smiled gently. “I’ll stay, then,” he said, lightly touching Sonny’s cheek.
“Can’t sleep?” Sonny asked, somewhere in the middle of the night.
Barba shifted in his recliner and peered over at him. “Never question my commitment to you,” he said with a grimace. “This is killing my back.”
He nodded. “Yeah, I can’t either. I’m a little nauseous.”
Sympathy filled Rafael’s eyes and he sat up, leaned over, and gently ran fingertips over Sonny’s forehead. “It’s the concussion,” he said. “Not uncommon.”
Closing his eyes, Sonny nodded. “Thank you for staying with me,” he murmured. “You didn’t have to, you know.”
“Yeah, I did,” he replied with a gentle smile.
Silence fell between them for a few moments, Rafael continuing to run his fingers lightly over Sonny’s head.
“I was thinking,” Carisi finally broke the silence. “Once I’m on my feet a little and can drive, I’d like to take you out to Staten Island for dinner with my folks.”
He paused his ministrations. “You want me to meet your parents?”
Smiling, Sonny nodded. “I do.” He reached over and squeezed Barba’s arm. “I told them about you, and they want to meet you.”
He studied him for a long minute. “Are they…okay with the idea?”
“They are,” he said, cupping Rafael’s cheek with his palm. “They said as long as I’m happy, they don’t care who I date.” He smirked. “They were a little surprised, given the number of skirts I chased as a teen.”
Rafael raised a brow. “I am not wearing a skirt.”
Sonny laughed. “I would hope not.”
Sobering, Rafael sighed. “I suppose, then, it’s time to talk to my mother.”
“Is she going to be upset?”
“No,” Barba assured him. “She knows I’m bisexual, and she doesn’t have an issue with that. I think, though, she’ll be surprised I’m seeing anyone. She’s made many, many jokes asking when she can expect the invitation to the wedding between me and my work.” He took a breath. “I suppose all of this just means things are getting more serious. We’ve talked to HR. Meeting each other’s parents.” He smiled and shook his head. “All of this has kind of snowballed from a tipsy night after Forlini’s.”
Carisi fell silent for a moment. “…Are you havin’ second thoughts?”
Rafael looked at him sharply. “What? No, not at all.” He smirked, mischief dancing in his eyes. “I am the one who – and this is a direct quote – ‘kissed you in front of God and everyone’ to announce to your squad that we are together.”
A soft chuckle escaped Carisi’s lips. “Worth it for the look on Fin’s face.”
“It’s just been a lot of change, and sometimes I just need to take a minute to adjust. And, as we have discussed many times, I am not as comfortable as you expressing how I’m feeling as you are.” He smiled reassuringly. “But no. No second thoughts.”
“Good,” Sonny murmured, leaning into Rafael’s touch. “Because you’re stuck with me.”
“I can take care of myself, you know,” Sonny complained the next day. “You don’t have to take me home with you.”
Rafael rolled his eyes and paused to look up at him. “You live in a three-story walkup, and you’re on crutches. How, exactly, is that going to work? Never mind that you live alone, and you’re going to need help.” He rested a hand on Sonny’s lower back and led him down the corridor to his apartment. “You are not going home alone. Stay with me. Let me help.”
Carisi sighed. “I’m grateful,” he said. “I just hate being so…useless.”
“You’re not useless,” Rafael said, stepping around the detective to unlock the door. “You’re injured. A very different condition.”
Door opened, Rafael helped Sonny to the sofa and assisted him in propping up his booted foot. “I’m glad it was just a hairline break,” Carisi said. “I can get away with just the boot for a few weeks and not a whole cast.”
“Okay,” Barba said, settling a pillow behind his back. “Rollins is stopping by your place to grab some clothes for you, I have your pain pills, and groceries are on the way. Do you need anything else right now?”
He offered an impish grin. “Can I have the remote?”
Chuckling, he handed it over, and then dropped on the sofa next to him. He smiled when Sonny rested his head on Rafael’s shoulder and snuggled in. “You know,” he said conversationally as he opened up Netflix, “you get all flustered and nervous when you’re worried about me. It’s kinda cute.”
His brow furrowed. “Cute? I am a forty-five-year-old man. I am not cute.”
Unrepentant, Sonny chuckled. “Then what are you?”
“Distinguished,” he replied, indignantly.
“How about sexy?” the detective countered with a wicked grin. The grin widened when Barba blushed. “Irresistible.” He leaned up and kissed Rafael gently. “Handsome.” He raised a brow. “Damn fine ass.”
By now, Barba had begun to chuckle too. “Would you stop? Eres tremendo comomierda.”
Sonny paused and looked up at him. “What does that mean?”
“You mean you don’t know?” Rafael asked innocently.
“Noooo…” Carisi sat up. “What does it mean, Rafael?”
“I can’t tell you.”
“What do you mean you can’t tell me?” A grin was spreading wide over Carisi’s lips.
Rafael was doing his best to feign seriousness, and rapidly losing. “It’s a classified Cuban secret,” he said. “If I tell you the…um…Castros might come after me. Hey!” he yelped around a laugh as Sonny pinned him to the sofa. “Get off.”
He had managed to push himself up and into Rafael’s lap, arms around the older man’s neck. “You wanted me here, you got me. Now what does it mean?”
Rafael slid his arms around Sonny’s waist and shook his head, laughing. “You are an idiot. And that’s why I lo—”
He froze, green eyes wide as he cut himself off.
Sonny, too, stopped. “You what?” he asked, gently.
“I, um…” Barba didn’t move, breath caught in his throat. “Sonny, I mean…I…”
The amusement faded from Carisi’s eyes, replaced by a tenderness. “Rafael?”
He bit his lip. “Y-yeah?”
Sonny leaned forward, stopping just short of Barba’s lips. “I love you, too,” he murmured, and closed the distance between them to kiss the attorney.
Rafael melted against him, heart pounding and body warm. He hadn’t anticipated saying those words just yet and wasn’t ready for the impact that hearing them had on him. Desperately, he wanted to crush Sonny against him, but remembered the cracked ribs just in time. Instead, he slid his hands around to the front and rested them on Carisi’s chest, savoring the feel of the steady heartbeat against his palm.
At length, he rested his forehead against Sonny’s. “Are you sure this isn’t too fast?”
“Babe, no,” Sonny cupped his cheeks. “It’s…it’s us. We feel what we feel.” He smiled. “Are you gonna be able to say that at some point without turning beet red?”
“Eventually,” Rafael replied with a sheepish grin. “But that doesn’t mean I feel it any less.”