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Clarke shut her locker with a satisfying clang, revealing Bellamy on the other side.
“Hey,” she greeted him. He’d always had a habit of popping up unexpectedly, and years of friendship had accustomed her to it.
“Hey,” he echoed, glancing around the halls distractedly. At long last he met her eyes with a sheepish smile, and she automatically adopted a cheery expression to hide the effect his attention always had on her.
“Looking for Echo?” she asked resignedly, still forcing a smile. Being the huge dork that he was, Bellamy had a rather alarming tendency to become completely infatuated with a different girl every few months — but he’d been stuck on this one for a year, and Clarke was finding it harder and harder to convince herself that it wouldn’t last. (On the upside, they were high school seniors, so she could always hope that any new relationships Bellamy got himself into wouldn’t survive the long distance next year.)
Besides, she knew Echo. Unlike most of Bellamy’s previous crushes — who were all completely out of his league and therefore not people she actually had to worry about — Echo was like them, middle-class in high school society. She was super-smart like Bellamy was, and pretty and sophisticated like Clarke wasn’t, and social and a crap ton of other things that were completely unfair but still true.
“Yeah,” Bellamy said softly, pulling Clarke back to the present. He shook his head, and she found her gaze caught by the way the light reflected off his dark curls. “Anyway, we still on for the movies tomorrow? O’s been looking forward to it all week.”
“Huh?” She blinked, trying to redirect her focus. “Oh, yeah, of course.”
Wells tapped her on the back, and she jumped. “You’re going to the stupid family-and-friends gathering this weekend, right?”
Choking down the urge to laugh — how had she not seen her childhood best friend approaching? Oh, right, she’d been talking to Bellamy — Clarke nodded. “Yeah, I’ll see you there.”
“Cool.” Wells glanced at Bellamy and shot Clarke a knowing smile before patting her shoulder and walking off.
When she turned back to him, Bellamy was scanning the passing students again. “I just really think she’s the one, you know? I — she’s smart, and funny, and pretty, and — damn, I’m really in love with her.”
Clarke could only nod helplessly, knowing exactly how he felt.
It was midnight and she had classes tomorrow, and going to the movies after meant that she wouldn’t be able to take a nap to catch up on the sleep she was missing right now. But she couldn’t quite take her eyes off her iPhone lock screen display.
The image was a few years old, from back before Raven and Wick went off to college. They were all at the beach — Clarke, Bellamy, Octavia, Raven, Wick, Monty, Jasper, and Maya — and O had coaxed a random passerby to take the photo for them. Just before they snapped the picture, Octavia had bumped Clarke’s shoulder, sending her off-balance, and Bellamy had thrown an arm around her waist so that she wouldn’t fall. That was Bellamy for you, always aware of his surroundings so he could look after the people he cared about.
It had been one of the happiest days of Clarke’s life.
He was probably asleep by now, Clarke thought. Health-conscious Bellamy, he of the ridiculous time management skills that ensured he easily finished everything he needed to do and got eight-plus hours of sleep each night.
She sighed, realizing that it was going to be another sleepless night. Setting her phone aside, she reached for the guitar that leaned against her nightstand. (It was one of Bellamy’s old ones; he’d given it to her along with an offer of lessons when she’d first expressed a tentative interest in learning.) Silently giving thanks that her room was far enough from her parents’ that they wouldn’t be woken, Clarke outlined a chord on the strings, strumming lightly.
Before she knew it, her fingers were tracing their way through the first melody Bellamy had ever taught her.
Bellamy, Bellamy, Bellamy. She loved him so much, and yet he was infatuated with someone else.
The longing rose up in her throat, choking her, and her eyes brimmed with tears. A single drop hit the polished wooden body of the guitar.
She wiped it away hastily, dashing away the remaining tears and lifting her head to watch the night sky. A shooting star winged across the view from her window.
How long had it been since she last wished on a star?
Didn’t matter. For Bellamy, she’d do it, and more.
As the mid-morning break crowd of students milled past her locker, Clarke caught sight of dark curls over a broad-shouldered frame and raised a hand to wave. Bellamy walked right past her to catch up with a girl. He laid a hand on her shoulder and she turned, and Clarke could see that it was Echo.
It was utterly unfair that, even in the process of thoroughly breaking her heart, Bellamy Blake was a perfect gentleman, a flawless human being far out of Clarke’s league.
As Echo dropped a kiss on his cheek, Clarke frowned. If Bellamy was going to give his heart to Echo, she better deserve it — return those awesome Bellamy hugs, love him back the way he loved her, appreciate those gorgeous brown eyes and realize just how lucky she was.
The movie was entertaining enough, and at least Bellamy had the consideration not to bring Echo along. (Then again, it could’ve been that he simply didn’t want to introduce his new girlfriend to his crazy little sister yet; Octavia had a history of deliberately scaring girls away from her brother, winking at Clarke all the while.)
All too soon, it was over, and the Blakes were waving goodbye as they parted to drive their separate ways home.
In the car alone, Clarke sighed — whether out of relief at not having to pretend anymore, or disappointment that Bellamy was no longer just her and O’s Bellamy — and turned the key in the ignition. She missed him already.
Back in her room at home, she finally turned out the light and tossed her phone aside. Rolling onto her side, she closed her eyes and tried to think of something or someone else.
Maybe she’d actually get some sleep tonight.
For so long, it had just been Clarke, Bellamy, and Octavia. And while the youngest would always be an indispensible member of the trio, Clarke had thought for a time that there could be something more between herself and Bellamy.
When she cried over her guitar chords, it was always for him. No one else held so much of her, held the power to break her heart.
Bellamy was her past and present, and, she’d thought, her future. He was the time taken up, but there was never enough. He was all that she needed to be perfectly happy.
“What’cha thinking about?” Bellamy asked, looking over Echo’s head at Clarke.
She glanced briefly at him, then shifted her gaze back to the football game. “Nothing.” As she always did, she faked a smile.