Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

In a small elementary school in Jinae, two boys met for the first time on their first day of fourth grade.

Jean Kirschtein had moved to the oceanside city with his parents when his mother and father both got transferred to the Jinae District Hospital from Trost. Even at nine years old, he stood out amongst the crowds of his peers, literally and figuratively. He was a lanky, awkward boy, with a soft heart and a face that was anything but.

Jean had resented the idea of moving, he loved Trost, it was his home. He also wasn’t wild about the idea of leaving his friends, it had taken him so long to come out of his shell and really make friends. He had dreaded telling his friends, Connie and Sasha especially that he was leaving. The two were sad to say goodbye, but they promised that they would write to him as often as they could, and that they’d stay in touch.

Jinae was a whole other world from Trost. Trost was urban, hardly anything but concrete and enormous buildings sprouting from the ground. Dizzying to look up at from the ground, but beautiful to look at from afar as different sized silhouettes as the sun sank below the mountains on the horizon. The area surrounding Trost was nothing like the city itself, sprawling forests and mountain springs; Trost stood out in the middle of it all.

Jinae was a different story. Jean had loved going there during vacations with his parents, it was smaller than Trost by a longshot, but full of life in its own way. It seemed like every night the streets and beaches were full of people and music and fun, and though Jean was sad to leave his friends, he felt a good amount of excitement at the thought of somehow living in the middle of that.

That was before he realized Jinae in the summer was very, very different from Jinae at any other point in the year. During the seasons that were not summer, Jinae was anything but lively; a sleepy little coastal town that had few things to do that had any longevity aside from the beaches and the movies. It was nothing at all like Jean had remembered it, and he found his new reality more than a little unappealing.

He was in the middle of writing a letter back to Sasha and Connie saying as much during recess when he felt a light tap on his shoulder. The sudden contact came as a surprise and he scrambled quickly out of his seat, taking his letter with him. Turning to see who had surprised him, he found himself face to face with an equally surprised, very freckled face that he recognized from his class.

“S-sorry.” The boy said quickly, stuttering at first. “I didn’t mean to frighten you.”

“A little late for that.” Jean said to himself.

“It’s alright.” Jean said quietly. “You just surprised me...um?”

“Marco.” The boy, or Marco apparently, said with a big goofy grin. “Marco Bodt.” He extended a hand towards Jean, the latter taking it in his own after a moment of brief hesitation.

“I’m Jean, Jean Kirschtein. Nice to meet you.” Jean mumbled out, he wasn’t really great with introductions. Marco didn’t seem to notice, or at least he didn’t show it. They stood there in silence for a second, neither knowing what to say.

“I saw you over here all alone, and I thought I’d come over and say hi.” Marco explained after a moment. “I haven’t seen you around here before.” He added.

“I, uh...Just moved here from Trost a few weeks ago.” Jean admitted. “S’my first day at school here.”

“Oh!” Marco exclaimed. “Well then welcome to Jinae. It must be so weird for you here, Jinae and Trost are so different.” He noted.

“Yeah…” Jean said, not really knowing what to say.

“What’s that?” Marco asked, pointing at the letter in Jean’s hand. Jean flushed red with embarrassment.

“It’s a letter…” He said. “To my friends back home.”

“Ooooh. That’s really cool that you guys write to each other. I’ve never written anyone before.” Marco said.

“I guess…” Jean said.

“D’you miss ‘em a lot?” Marco asked, his head tilting a bit to the side at the end of it.

“A little…” Jean lied. He missed Connie and Sasha a lot. He felt lonely without them.

“Well, I was gonna ask you if you wanted play tag with me.” Marco said. “But if you’re busy, you don’t have to.” He finished, rubbing the back of his neck and smiling. Jean thought about it for a moment. He decided the letter could wait, Marco seemed nice, and he was kind enough to extend this offer to a new kid he’d never met.

“I- I can finish it later.” Jean said, and that grin from earlier immediately spread across Marco’s face.

“Awesome!” Marco said. Jean folded up his letter and slipped it into his pocket. Maybe life in Jinae wouldn’t be as bad as he’d feared. The grin on Marco’s face turned from goofy to devilish.

“Race you!” He said, and before Jean could say anything, he was off. Jean was startled for a moment, before racing after Marco.

All too soon, the bell signifying the end of recess and the beginning of lunch rang. Marco led him into the school and toward the cafeteria. They chatted walking through the halls, and in line for food. Jean grabbed the hot lunch for the day, which was some kind of fish sandwich, and didn’t quite notice the look on Marco’s face as he did so.

They sat together at a small, round table in the corner of the cafeteria, and were soon joined by a small group. A girl with dark hair pulled into loose pigtails named Mina sat on the other side of Marco. She was flanked by a blond boy named Thomas, as well as a boy named Franz who had a shaved head, and a redhead named Hannah with freckles that reminded Jean of Marco.

The others were very interested about what life was like in Trost, asking Jean question after question. Jean didn’t mind it at first, but the more they asked, the more he started to remember that he missed his home, and he missed his friends.

“So, Jean. What do you like to do for fun?” Marco asked, and Jean was thankful for the break in conversation.

“Uh- I like to read.” Jean said after a moment, Marco’s friend’s seemed disinterested in that topic. “I also like video games.” He added, trying to connect. It worked.

“Oh!” Thomas exclaimed. “What games do you like to play?” He asked.

“Um, Mario mostly...and Zelda.”Jean said. “My parents got me a Wii for my birthday last year” He noted. “And I have a Gamecube.”

“Whoa!” Hannah and Thomas exclaimed in unison. “We should get together some time and play together!” Hannah added.

“Y-yeah.” Jean said, looking to Marco. “Do you like video games?” He asked.

“I haven’t played many before, but I’d love to try.” Marco admitted.

They talked about games and television for the rest of lunch. When the period was over, they split up and went to their own classes. Mina and Marco were in Jean’s class, and they sat together. Jean didn’t feel so lonely or afraid anymore, in one kind gesture Marco had done away with his fear of having no friends. When it was time to go home, Marco and Jean walked to where the parents waited in their cars, taking a seat on a grassy embankment and talking while they waited.

“So…” Marco started. “You said you liked books at lunch. What’s your favorite book?” He asked.

“Ah- I love Harry Potter.” Jean said, thinking for a moment. “And I love Matilda.” Marco brightened.

“I like those too!” He said.

They talked about their favorite parts of each book, what house they thought they’d be in, and what it would be like to have psychic powers. Jean saw his mother’s car pull up, and was bummed at the thought of having to leave. He really liked talking to Marco.

“I gotta go, my mom’s here.” Jean said.

“Oh, alright.” Marco said, with a slight frown that made Jean feel a little bit happy. He wasn’t the only one disappointed.

“See you tomorrow?” Jean asked.

“Definitely.” Marco said with a nod.

Jean sat up, and dusted himself off, and got in his mom’s car, and buckled himself in, waving to Marco as his mother pulled away from the school.

“Who was that, honey?” She asked, happy to see her son happy.

“That was Marco, he’s my new friend.” Jean exclaimed. “I made a bunch of new friends!”

“Now, aren’t you glad you went to school instead of staying home like you wanted to?” His mother asked.

“Yeah!” Jean exclaimed. “It was scary first, but then Marco came up to me at recess and asked me to play and everything was fine.”

“Well, I’m glad you had a good day.” His mother said with a soft smile. That night, he finished his letter to Connie and Sasha, and he told them all about his first day.

That weekend, Jean had Marco, Franz, Thomas, and Hannah over to play. They played super smash brothers melee. Marco showed up first, and Jean showed him how to play, and he picked it up quickly. They took turns playing, whomever came in last switching out with the person who wasn’t playing.

Time started to fly by. Days became weeks, which became months. Jean and Marco had become inseparable in no time, and spent as much time with each other as they could. Fifth grade rolled around, and although they were in different classes, they still played during recess and spent time with each other outside of school. Whether they sat in each other’s bedroom reading, doing homework, or playing, they did it together as much as they could. Sleepovers often consisted of these, and other things, the two would talk until late into the night about the future, wondering what middle school would be like, and that no matter what, they would remain friends.

And then life threw them an obstacle close to the end of the year in the form of another transfer for Jean’s parent’s. They were being brought back to Trost, some recent changes in staffing leaving the hospital they’d worked in understaffed and in need of experienced doctors, they were the first ones called. Jean did not take the news well.

“But we JUST moved here last year!” He yelled at them when they told him. “Why do we have to move again?!” He didn’t normally yell at his parents, and usually they wouldn’t have let him. But they understood where he was coming from, and that he was hurting.

“I know sweetie, but they need us back home. We can’t just say no..” His mother said, rubbing his cheek softly, only to have him recoil.

“When do we leave?” He asked, feeling defeated.

“We’re moving back the week after you finish school.” His father said.

“But that’s so soon!” Jean exclaimed. He didn’t want to leave, it wasn’t fair. Didn’t his parents know that?

“We’re really, really sorry sweetie. We didn’t know how to tell you.” His mother said. But Jean didn’t respond, he simply went up to his room, shut the door, and cried.

~~~~~

He told Marco the next day at school.

“I’m gonna run away.” He said. They were sitting at the same picnic table he’d been writing his first letter to Connie and Sasha. The same picnic table where he’d first met Marco.

“Jean.” Marco said, chuckling. “You can’t run away.”

“But I don’t want to leave!” Jean said. “They can’t make me leave you.” Marco blushed at that.

“Jean, I don’t want you to leave either, but you can’t run away. You’d be all alone.” He reasoned. Jean thought about it for a second.

“We could run away together.” Jean said. “We wouldn’t be alone. We’d have each other.”

“Jean...We can’t.” Marco said, and Jean knew he was right. Marco usually was, even when neither of them wanted him to be.

“I’ll write to you too, y’know?” Jean said after a moment. “Like I do with Connie and Sasha.” Marco smiled.

“I’ll finally get to write my first letter to someone.” Marco thought aloud.

“Yeah.”

“Jean?”

“Yeah?”

“D’you wanna play tag?”

“Yeah.”

That night, he wrote Sasha and Connie with the news.

~~~~~

Graduation came faster than either of them would have liked. Jean thought about how excited they had been for this day before, and how miserable they were about it now. The week following graduation was busy, Jean helping his parents pack their belongings into a van far sooner than he ever would have liked to. He spent his last day in Jinae with Marco, at a small cove on the beach near Marco’s house.

They sat on large rock together overlooking the ocean in near silence. When it was time for Jean to go, he hugged Marco tight.

“Don’t forget to write, okay?” Marco said forcing a smile.

“I won’t.” Jean said, unable to do the same.

With one final hug, Jean got into the car with his parents, and drove off, leaving Jinae, and a portion of his heart in the rearview mirror.”

~~~~~

When Jean left, Trost seemed so full of life. When he came back though, it just seemed cold, and foreign to him, he longed to be back on the seaside, to be back with Marco. He found solace in his old friends, Connie and Sasha were the silver lining to it all, as well as Armin and even Eren. They were familiar, and they were fun and they helped make Trost feel like home again. But they weren’t Marco, and even though they wrote each other every week, it still wasn’t the same.

Summer ended and school began, and for just a little while each day, Jean found he could push the thoughts of Marco and the accompanying loneliness out of his mind. It began to get a little easier for him, and he hoped Marco felt the same.

The advent of technology and the internet helped a lot, too. Letters became instant messaging once they were deemed old enough by their parents, instant messaging became texting and calls. Their freshman year of high school, social media began to boom, and they found themselves with a myriad of ways to connect with each other.

That summer, Jean went back down to Jinae to stay with Marco for two weeks. It was Marco’s parents who suggested it, and Jean’s parents were more than on board with the idea. Jean boarded a plane bound for Jinae the first day of summer vacation, and a few hours later, he was met with a big hug, and a lot of tears.

“You got so big.” Marco said as he pulled away.

“So did you, you’re taller than me now, Bodt. There’s no way that’s fair.” Jean said, Marco laughed.

Those two weeks with Marco were some of the happiest of Jean’s life, he’d missed Marco so much. Even though they’d been talking every day, it wasn’t the same as being with him. The first few days with Marco felt like a dream, and it was one he never wanted to wake up from.

Being with Marco this time felt different, though. Jean couldn’t quite place it until Marco told him that Mina had asked him out on a date. Jean immediately felt irritated at the thought of Mina and Marco together. He hated to admit it, but he was jealous.

At first, he tried to convince himself it was just because Marco dating her would mean he had less time to be Jean’s friend. Yeah, that was it.

Except it wasn’t, not at all. Realizing that you might like your best friend as more than a best friend is not exactly easy to deal with, especially so suddenly, and when they lived so far away from each other. He resolved to try to get over his feelings, no matter how impossible it seemed.

Despite it all, he still enjoyed being back with Marco. Being with Marco again was like coming home after a long day. But all things, even good things, must come to an end, and on their last day together, the found themselves on a familiar beach reliving a familiar conversation. But this time, to Jean, it felt different.

“I still think we should r-”

“Jean we can’t run away together.” Marco cut him off. This might not have been the first time this trip Jean had mentioned it.

“I know.” Jean sighed. “Doesn’t mean I don’t want to, though.” The goodbye hug did not feel nearly as good as the one he’d received when he first landed in Jinae.

They promised they’d see each other again next summer.

Unfortunately, not all promises can be kept. Jean got a job at a local pizzeria, and Marco got a job as a lifeguard on the beach, and the two were too busy to schedule a proper time to make a visit. A small, small part of Jean was relieved. Though over the course of the year he had come to terms with his feelings for Marco, the thought of being close with him and being unable to tell him was not particularly enjoyable. He had griped about it to Connie and Sasha for months leading up to summer.

They still called each other though, when they had the time, and that would have to be enough. That summer flew by even faster than the previous one, and Jean found himself entering his junior year of high school.

Jean was grabbing a textbook out of his locker, with Connie and Sasha on either side of him.

“Hear there’s a new kid in town. They say he’s quite the looker, Jean.” Sasha said as she looked through her phone.

“Sash, what do you care about that, thought you didn’t swing that way? Or at all.” Jean said shutting his locker.

“Just because I’m not hungry doesn’t mean I can’t look at the menu, Jeanathan.”

“First of all, you are always hungry, that was a terrible fucking metaphor. Second of all that is not even close to my name, and you know I hate that.” Jean pointed out.

“Whatever, Jeanboy. What matters is you do swing that way. Hell, you might even know the guy already.” She mused.

“What do you mean?” Jean asked.

“I mean he’s from Jinae, so there’s a good chance you know him already.” Sasha said with a grin. Jean felt his heart beat heavy in his chest. He felt a tap on his shoulder.

“He might also be right behind you.” A voice behind him said.

Jean quickly turned around and found himself face to face with a very familiar, very freckled face that he hadn’t seen in over a year.

“Hey, Jean.” Marco said, flashing his usual goofy grin.

Jean stood, eyes wide, mouth agape.

“M-Marco? What’re you doing here?”

Chapter Text

M- Marco? What’re you doing here?” Jean stuttered. Shit, how much of that conversation with Sasha had Marco heard?

“School enrollment is low down in Jinae, and they had to cut a few teachers in each of the school.” Marco explained. “Mom was one of them. She got an offer from one of the middle schools up here in Trost, and dad was able to get a transfer to your police department...So here I am.”

Jean was speechless. He felt like he was in a dream, and that any moment Marco would disappear, and he’d wake up in his bedroom disappointed.

But it wasn’t a dream. Marco... his Marco was here in front of him.

“Are you just gonna stand there blinking, or am I gonna get a hug from my best friend?” Marco asked with a smirk. Jean didn’t need to be told twice, he hugged Marco tightly, laying his head on Marco’s much broader chest. In that moment, he didn’t care what anyone else thought, and he knew that Marco wouldn’t mind.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were moving up here?” He asked.

“I thought it would be nice to surprise you.” Marco said. “Thought it would all be worth it when I saw that stupid look on your face.” He added, dropping his hands, letting them rest on the small of Jean’s back.

Jean would be lying if he said he didn’t wish for Marco to drop his hands just a bit lower. What he wouldn’t give to have Marco hold him, arms wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer until-

No. He couldn’t think like that. Marco was his best friend, and Jean had no idea whether Marco even liked guys let alone whether Marco liked him in that way. His thoughts would have to stay his thoughts, he had only just gotten Marco back. He couldn’t risk losing him because he couldn’t keep his feelings to himself.

He introduced Marco to Connie and Sasha, and found they were more than acquainted with him. The three of them shared their first period lit. class together, and the two recognized him the moment Ms. Ral had introduced him. Once they confirmed he was the same Marco Jean knew from Jinae, the three devised this surprise attack. He was going to get them back for this little scheme later.

It turned out he and Marco had the same class second period, Chemistry with Ms. Hange. He tried to pay attention in class, he really did, but he was too caught up in thinking about Marco. Not even Hange’s eccentric teaching style could pull him out of his thoughts, and before he knew it class had ended.

“You look so...different.” Jean said as they walked down the hall towards the cafeteria.

“Should I take that as a compliment?” Marco asked with a chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck like he had since they were kids.

“Oh shit, yeah. You look great...I mean- Fuck” Jean stuttered. What the hell was wrong with him. Why was he being so awkward now? The sound of Marco’s laugh brought him back to reality.

“I’ll take what I can get. You’re looking pretty good yourself.” He said with a wink, Jean could feel heat pooling in his cheeks, he was sure he was beet red. Marco pretended not to notice. They got their lunches, and were beckoned over to a table by Connie. Beside him sat Sasha, who was ravenously tearing into a burger as if she hadn’t eaten anything in weeks.

“Hey guys.” Connie said “How was class?”

“It was good, though Ms. Hange nearly started a fire during the middle of a demonstration.” Marco said. Had she? Jean really hadn’t been paying attention, but explosions and small fires were pretty commonplace when your chem teacher was Zoe Hange.

“Hello hello hello!” A voice Jean instantly recognized called from behind him, and it made his blood run cold. While he and Eren Jaeger had gotten off on the wrong foot originally, over the years the two of them had become friends. Underneath his cocky attitude and quick temper, Eren was really a good friend to have. He was, however, not subtle at all, especially when subtlety was needed.

When Jean first began to really question himself, his sexuality, and his feelings for a certain freckled boy he’d known in Jinae, Eren was one of the first people he turned to to talk about it. Eren, while lacking in the subtlety department was very understanding, and was not one to judge others for their feelings. Jean also figured that Eren and Marco would never meet, so Eren’s inability to keep his mouth shut would not really be a problem.

What had he gotten himself into?

“So, who’s the newbie there next to ya, Seabiscuit?” Eren asked, sliding in next to Marco.

“I’m Marco, Jean and I lived in Jinae together.” Marco said with a smile, and Eren’s eyes went wide once it hit him just who Marco was.

“Well I’m am Eren Jaeger, and may I just say it is a pleasure to actually meet the famous Marco Bodt in person. I’ve heard so much about you from Adios over there.”

“Good things, I hope?” Marco asked.

“Nothing but, Lady Suffolk here practically sang your praises for years after he moved back here.” Eren said.

“Lady..Suffolk?” Marco asked, obviously amused.

“The first horse to win the 2.5 mile.” Eren noted.

“Eren insists that I apparently look like a horse.” Jean said not bothering to hide his irritation.

“You can’t run from the truth, Bucephalus. Embrace it.”

“I do not look like a horse, Jaeger.” Jean spat out.

“That is not the sound of you embracing it.”

The two went back and forth like that, Marco seemed to find it all incredibly hilarious, and Jean relished in the sound of his laugh. He’d endure a million horse jokes if they made Marco laugh like that.

“Hot damn.” Eren said while Marco left to throw away their trash. “They grow ‘em nice down in Jinae.” Jean bristled at the comment.

“What do you mean?” He asked, his tone sharp.

“I mean that boy is fuckin’ smoking hot, Ajax. I think I’m starting to see why you missed Jinae so much.” Eren said. Jean sighed.

“It wasn’t just because of that. Besides, Marco doesn’t like me like that. We’re just friends.” He said.

“You say that, Jeanboy, but that boy’s been staring at you like the sun shines out of your ass this whole time. I’m not sure your unrequited feelings are actually unrequited.” Eren said bluntly.

“We’re just friends, Eren. I’m not gonna jeopardize that because you have some crazy hunch.”

“You can just say you’re scared to ask him out, Jean. He’s way out of your league anyway.” Jean bristled at that.

“I’m not scared!” Jean said. “I’d just rather not mess up our friendship by asking my best friend out.” He reasoned.

“Whatever you say, Jeanboy. Whatever you say.” Eren said with a smirk.

“It’s true!” He exclaimed.

“What’s true?” Marco said, sliding back into the booth they all shared. Jean froze, and blushed even harder.

“I, uh-”

“That Jean is a total dork.” Sasha said, Jean made a mental note to double kill her later. Marco chuckled.

“Tell me something I don’t know.” Marco said.

“Ouch.” Jean said. Marco grinned.

“S’okay, Jean. I still love you.” Connie choked on his drink as Jean choked on air. He knew Marco didn’t mean it like he wanted him to, but hearing those words come out of his mouth made Jean’s heart skip a few beats. A devilish grin spread across Eren’s face.

“So, Marco...You dating anyone back home?” He asked in the most innocent tone he could muster.

“Ah, no, actually. Someone asked me out a few weeks back, but the feeling wasn’t mutual, and moving here would’ve made it hard even if I was interested.” He said.

“Oh, I suppose that’s good then. Long distance relationships can be hard.” Eren noted. Marco nodded in agreement.

“Well, I’m sure you’ll find someone here, if you look.” Sasha said. “A guy like you would have no trouble.”

“Well...There is someone I’m interested in.” Marco said. “But I don’t think it would work out.” Jean nearly spat his drink out. One day and Marco had found someone he was interested in? It was going to be hard enough hiding his feelings for Marco as it was. But the thought of Marco with some girl on his arm, of having to pretend like he didn’t want to be in her place was too much. He stood up abruptly.

“I gotta go.” He muttered. “I think I left something in the chem lab.”

“Okay, I’ll come with you if you w-” Marco started.

“No.” Jean cut him off. “You can stay here, I can go on my own.” Marco looked at him, confusion and concern all over his face, but Jean didn’t stick around long enough for him to ask any more questions

He’d lied, he hadn’t left anything in the chem lab, and instead he made his way to the school’s auditorium. There, in the back of the the stage was a flight of stairs that lead up to a breaker room for the stage lights, and a costume closet. Hardly anyone came up there during the school day, and that number was even smaller when there wasn’t a production going on, and Jean often went there when he wanted to be alone. It was his “secret” spot, and Eren was the only person that knew he went there sometimes.

In his pocket, his phone went off.

Marco: Is everything alright?

He looked at the text, and promptly ignored it. He didn’t- no, he couldn’t talk to Marco right now. He knew it was shitty, and that it wasn’t fair to ignore Marco, or blame him for liking someone else. But he couldn’t help how he felt, and if he were to talk to Marco about it now, he was afraid he’d say something he regretted.

The bell for the next lunch/3rd period went off, but luckily Jean had the period free, so it didn’t matter. He was, however, very bored. Being the middle of the first day back to school, he didn’t even have homework to take his mind off of Marco. He pulled out his phone and earbuds, put his music on shuffle, and closed his eyes.

“Say something I’m giving up on you. I’ll be the one if you want me to.” Rang in his ears. Jean felt his heart throb for a moment, he debated changing the song but decided not to.

“Anywhere I would have followed you.” Jean felt tears welling up behind his eyelids. He should’ve been happy, Marco was here, they were together again after years of wishing they could be near each other. Yet, here he was ignoring him, literally hiding from his best friend.

But that was just it. He didn’t want to only be friends with Marco. It had been easier when they had distance between them. Like Eren had said, long distance relationships are hard, and a hassle. But Marco was here, and though a large part of him was terrified of telling Marco how he felt.

But Marco liked someone else. Jean could try and pretend his feelings didn’t exist, but he couldn’t pretend to be happy about the idea of Marco with somebody else. That thought alone made the tears come faster.

“Jean?” His eyes shot open. There in front of him was Marco, looking down at him with a worried expression on his face. Jean took one of his earbuds out.

“Shit, Marco you scared me...Didn’t hear you come up here.” Jean said, wiping his eyes on the sleeve of his jacket, as if wiping them away would make Marco forget they were there in the first place. “Wait, how did you even find me here in the first place?” He asked.

“I went to the chem lab after you left, and Ms. Hange said you never showed up. When I couldn’t find you anywhere, I found Eren. He told me you might be up here.”

“Of course” Jean thought. “Leave it to Eren to rat out my secret spot at the first possible opportunity.” Marco knelt down in front of him.

“Jean, what’s the matter. Why were you hiding back here?” Marco asked.

“Nothing’s the matter.” Jean lied.

“Bullshit. You left so suddenly and lied about where you were going, you ignored my text, and when I finally find you, you’re in tears. So cut the shit and tell me what’s wrong.” Marco said, taking Jean by surprised. Marco had never talked to him like this, hell, Marco had never talked to anyone like this.

“It’s nothing, Marco, don’t worry about it. I’m fine.” Jean said, hoping Marco would let it go.

“You’re a terrible liar, Jean. I want to help, but I can’t if I don’t understand what’s wrong.” Marco said.

“You wouldn’t understand even if I told you!” Jean shouted, before he could stop himself. Marco recoiled, shocked that Jean had yelled at him. There was a moment of silence between them.

“How can you say I wouldn’t understand when you won’t fucking tell me what it is?! Do you think that if you tell me whatever it is that I’ll somehow think less of you, Jean?” He asked, receiving only silence in response.

“Jean...Is that really what you think of me? Do you think I’m that shallow of a friend?” He asked, the hurt audible in his voice.

Jean wanted to say no. He didn’t think Marco was shallow, Marco wasn’t shallow, but…

“Please Jean. Tell me what’s wrong.” Marco pleaded.

“And I will swallow my pride.”

Jean leaned in, and kissed Marco softly, Marco’s eyes widening in shock.

“You’re the one that I love.’”

“Now you know.” Jean said quietly, before moving to walk past a still bewildered Marco.

“And I’m saying goodbye.”

“Wait!” Marco called from behind him, snapping out of his daze. Jean could hear Marco move from move behind him, and kept going. Marco moved in front of him, trying to block of the exit.

“Move out of the way Marco.” Jean said, refusing to look up at him, he couldn’t. If he looked at Marco, he’d break.

“Jean, I-”

“I know you already like someone, and that kissing you like that was a dick move, but I couldn’t- I like you Marco, a lot. I’ve liked you for so long, and I wasn’t going to tell you. I thought I’d never have to, I thought I could keep it to myself. But then you showed up here. I understand if you don’t wanna be friends anymore, but I had to do that.”

“Jean-”

“I’m sorry… I fucked everything up” Jean whispered.

“Jean!” Marco repeated.

“Please move out of the way Mar-” Marco kissed him hard, stopping him mid sentence. This time, it was Jean who was dazed when they parted.

“I like you too, you dork. It’s always been you. Ever since you asked me to run away with you when we were kids, it’s been you. I love you, Jean Kirschtein.” Marco whispered.

“Really?” Jean choked out.

“Really, Jean.” Marco chuckled.

“Me too…” Jean said. “I mean, I love you too Marco.” They came together again, hands wandering all over each other, exploring each other like they’d wanted to for years. Marco’s hands were static, everywhere he touched Jean tingled. They fell around his waist, and pulled him flush against Marco as the taller boy leaned down for another kiss.

Jean couldn’t believe this was actually happening, for the second time that day he was sure he was dreaming, and for the second time that day he was so happy to find that he wasn’t. After a few minutes, but what felt like hours they pulled apart, resting their foreheads together and catching their breath.

“So does this mean we’re…” Jean started.

“Boyfriends? Yeah, if you want to be.” Marco said with a grin.

“I do.” Jean said, grinning back at him.