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“Annie, I thought I told you not to leave Troy and Abed alone,” Jeff scowled. “They’re probably halfway across campus trying to train the geese outside the Science Wing. Or trying to read each other's minds with some magic machine made of cardboard boxes and glitter glue.”
Scoffing indignantly, Annie fiddled with the buttons on her cardigan. “Jeff! They said they’d come,” she pouted.
“In about fifteen seconds, they’re gonna walk in here giggling about something stupid,” he assured her, gesturing behind himself to emphasize the two friends who were, indeed, walking towards them.
“You guys,” Troy started, breathless from laughter.
“I hate to say I told you so…,” Jeff said, with a pointed look at Annie.
“No, you really don’t!” Britta argued.
“Yeah, Jeff, you love rubbing it in,” Shirley added in her high, lilting syllables.
Pierce chuckled. “You know what else Jeff loves rubbing in?” The group looked at him expectantly, and Pierce looked surprised, as if he was expecting them to stop him. “Oh, you know. He’s- he’s gay- you know, wieners! Because he’s gay,” He finished with a proud smile.
“Guys! Guess what me and Abed did in poetry class,” Troy cut in, giggling to himself as he and Abed shared secretive glances.
“Oh, jeez, I don’t know,” Jeff deadpanned, “I guess we’ll just never find out because you guys won’t tell us the whole, elaborate story anyway-”
“Troy and I wrote love poems,” Abed said neutrally. “It was hilarious.”
“Aww, that’s nice,” Shirley said sweetly. She dropped her voice to a low whisper. “Why do I feel like the other shoe’s about to drop?”
“You have to read them,” Troy guffawed, handing the piece of notebook paper to Annie. “They’re amazing.”
Annie’s face went white as she scanned the note. “I don’t think I get it,” she said. “Troy, is this… about Abed?”
Troy nodded, a huge grin on his face, waiting for her reaction. “It’s good right?”
“So… you and Abed wrote love poems about each other?” Britta said disbelievingly. “Troy, isn’t that kind of-”
“Gay!” Pierce interrupted with a wheezing laugh, although that was definitely not how she had intended to finish that sentence.
“Hey, we’re not gay, man, it’s just funny!” Troy said defensively, crossing his arms.
Annie blinked back at Troy for a moment. “So, it’s like… a joke?”
“Yes. It’s funny,” Abed insisted with a loud, fake-sounding laugh.
The group was silent for a moment.
“I can’t do this today, I have to get home to my babies,” Shirley sighed, picking up her oversized bag and getting up.
Britta looked at Troy intently. “You guys know I’d support you no matter what-”
“I’m not gay, Britta!”
Abed nodded.
“I’m straight, Abed is straight-”
At that statement, Abed inhaled sharply, blinking quickly as he turned his head to the side. “No.”
Troy whirled around to face his friend, eyes wide. “What?”
“I’m bisexual. Troy’s straight,” he added.
“What?!” Jeff hissed, shutting his mouth at Britta’s burning glare. “I mean… you are? That’s-”
“Abed!” Britta cut in, mouthing frantically to Jeff, Get Pierce out of here! “I’m so proud of you for coming out of the closet. Congratulations on living your truth!”
“Pierce and I are going to- find an excuse to leave,” Jeff finished lamely, dragging the older man out of the study room before he could make another insensitive comment.
Abed tilted his head. “Thanks, Britta. But I didn’t know I was in the closet? It’s not like it’s a secret.”
Troy’s head was spinning. “Then why didn’t you tell me?” His voice came out high-pitched and squeaky.
“I thought you might be upset,” Abed hummed, and Troy couldn’t tell if the statement was an answer to his question or a reaction to his response. And now Troy’s brain was going to explode. “I’ll give you two some space. Britta, you can do your pretend therapist thing.” He got up quickly and wordlessly, leaving Troy with his jaw dropped open.
…
“Why wouldn’t he tell me?” Troy paced hysterically around the study room. “I thought we were friends!”
Britta lowered her glasses expectantly. “And how does that make you feel?”
“We never lie to each other! Why do you think he doesn’t trust me? I tell him everything!”
Britta snorted, dropping the therapist character for a low, snarky comment. “Troy, you wrote him that poem and you didn’t even tell him you’re in love with him.”
“I’m not in love with Abed!” He sputtered.
“We aren’t- I’m not gay, alright?” He added in a hushed voice.
Britta’s eyes widened with understanding. “But… you know it would be okay if you were, right?”
Troy doesn’t answer, just continuing to shake his head back and forth in distress as he sat back down . “I’m not homophobic Britta. I just can’t see Abed with a guy. It’s weird.”
Britta had started to say something about indetermin-ilized homophobia or something like that, her speech littered with buzzwords he didn’t understand. At this point though, Troy had mostly stopped listening, his mind racing. He couldn’t push away the sinking feeling in his chest when he thought about Abed holding hands with another guy, Abed kissing another guy, Abed-
“Holy. Shit,” Troy breathed.
He looked over to Britta, who gave him a tiny encouraging smile as she waited for his revelation.
“Britta, I think I’m… homophobic,” he choked out.
“What?”
“Holy shit! No wonder Abed didn’t want to tell me. He knows me better than I know myself!” Troy gasped. “I’m a horrible friend. Britta, you have to help me!”
“Troy, I don’t think you’re homophobic.”
“I’m so stupid. He was probably scared for me to find out and now he totally thinks I hate him. I have to talk to him!” Troy leaped out of his seat.
“I- Whatever,” Britta mumbled to the empty room. “He’ll figure it out eventually.
…
“I think we need to talk.”
Abed blinked. “Okay.”
“I have to apologize.”
“Troy, you don’t have to be sorry. I completely understand if you don’t want to be friends anymore. I didn’t mean to lie to you, I just didn’t want to lose our friendship. I thought I could hide it but you’ve obviously figured it out, so-”
“Abed, what are you talking about?” Troy said, confused. “You’re scaring me, buddy. Why would I want to stop being your friend?”
Abed paused. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I’m in love with you.”
Oh.
“Oh.” Troy said softly.
“I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, but I totally get it. I’m sorry-”
“Abed… Abed, I’m in love with you too,” Troy whispered, surprising himself.
“Oh. Cool.” Abed said. “Cool cool cool.” They did their handshake.
Troy’s heart pounded in his chest. It was all kind of hitting him at this moment. In the back of his mind, he was distinctly aware that it wasn’t too late to pull away, deny everything and forget all of this had happened. He could still go back to his normal life, as a former jock and star quarterback who was popular and normal and not in love with his best friend. But suddenly, all the voices telling him who he was and who he was supposed to be were quiet. The only voice in Troy’s head was his own, begging him to kiss Abed now and not look back.
“Does that mean I can kiss you?” Abed asked.
Troy cut him off by pressing his lips to Abed’s, hoping he could tell the answer was yes, and, please don’t ever stop and god, I meant every word of that stupid poem.
They broke apart after a moment.
“Oh my god, I think I’m gay,” Troy gasped.
“You don’t have to tell the study group if you don’t want to,” Abed said. “We can do a secret romance trope.”
“No, I want them to know,” Troy answered automatically. His words were unplanned, reckless, but he knew instantly he didn’t want to hide this. “I want everyone to know I’m yours,” he whispered, his face burning when he realized he’d said it aloud. Dang it, that was too much. “…Buddy,” he added awkwardly with a thumbs up. Saved it.
“You’re very attractive,” Abed mumbled, leaning in for another kiss. “Also that’s good, because I’m pretty sure they already know.”
…
“Speaking of figuring things out, me and Abed have an announcement.”
Abed hummed in agreement. “Troy and I are living together.”
“Oh, that’s nice!”
“If you want to get us a gift, we’re registered at Linens and Things,” Troy said.
“We have plenty of linens, we mainly want the things,” Abed added. “Also, me and Troy are together.”
FIN.
#sixseasonsandamovie