Chapter Text
The first one she got was a drawing of a bear holding a flower in its paw.
That was it. No words, no nothing. Simple.
Folded together and pushed into her mailbox on the 14th of February when she was only six years old.
She’d thought it was sweet and had hung it on her bedroom wall – where it’s place still is today.
Of course Lisa had teased her for it a bazillion times, but she’d never had the heart to throw it away. She hadn’t thrown any of them – of course – but the first one always was her favorite.
Until today that was, anyway.
“So?”, Lisa asked as soon as she stepped into Jennie’s room – quickly crossing the room to throw herself onto her best friends’ bed, as she always did.
Jennie looked up from the homework she was currently immersed in and rose her eyebrows.
“What?”, she countered – a challenge in her voice. She knew, of course. She knew Lisa and what day it was and what the other girl had asked her annually for the past few years.
Didn’t mean that she couldn’t have a little fun on her own with this.
“You know what.”, the younger girl groaned as she pushed herself up to sit on the edge of the bed – her long legs tangling from it, now almost touching the floor because she’d grown so much.
Sometimes Jennie was a little jealous of her height and her figure, because Lisa was all tall and skinny and pretty now that puberty had hit her like a truck.
In the meantime Jennie was… well… she was Jennie. All chubby cheeks and short legs. Nothing like her best friend.
“I’m afraid I have no idea what you’re talking about.”, she said as nonchalant as possible – sending the other girl a challenging look.
She loved a good challenge. They both did. So it wasn’t a surprise when Lisa glared back at her and squinted her eyes before jumping to her feet and hurrying over to where Jennie was still sitting in her chair.
She didn’t even have time to react before Lisa was opening the top drawer of her desk, snatching something from within and then waving it back and forth in front of Jennie’s face.
“Give that back!”, she demanded as Lisa quickly turned to move back to the bed – still holding the letter triumphally into the air, not listening to her friend at all.
“Lalisa! You give that back right now!”, Jennie repeated even louder – now getting up in a rush herself and flinging herself at the other girl who only laughed as she held the paper in question even higher above their heads – knowing full well that short Jennie could never reach it there.
“Get it then, if you want it so badly.”, she teased as she turned around facing her best friend. She grinned as she watched Jennie jump up and down in order to grasp the envelope – failing miserably because duh… Lisa was a giant.
“Don’t make me hurt you, Lalisa. I mean it. Give it back. It’s mine.”
The giggle erupting from the younger girls’ mouth would’ve offended Jennie dearly, if it wasn’t for the little wrinkles around Lisa’s eyes that were just so fricking endearing.
“Hurt me? Nini, you’re tiny. You could never hurt me.”
“No, but I can do that…”, Jennie countered – before moving her fingers to Lisa’s sides as she started tickling the other girl mercilessly and Lisa squirmed before falling to her knees and Jennie quickly snatched the letter from her grip.
“That was a nasty move, Miss Kim and you know it. What a cheat.”, Lisa grumbled before softly kicking against the other girls’ shin.
“Don’t you dare make me the bad guy here, you idiot. You literally stole something that is mine.”
“You’re gonna tell me what it says anyway. Why choose violence, Nini?”, Lisa asked, looking up at the older girl as sweetly as she could – getting a headshake in return.
“I’m not gonna tell you.”, Jennie explained as she pushed the envelope into the back pocket of her jeans.
At that, Lisa sat up in a rush – almost bumping her head on the bedside table.
“What? Why not?”
Jennie tried to suppress the grin that was about to take over her face, but failed miserably when she saw the pout on Lisa’s visage.
“You’re just going to make fun of them again. That’s mean, Lisa.”
The girl in question rose to her feet – now towering over Jennie again.
“When did I ever make fun of your secret admirer?”, she asked in a shrill tone – throwing her arms into the air in an over-the-top theatrical way.
Jennie had to stifle another laugh before answering firmly.
“Oh, I don’t know.”, she started. “How about: every fricking time you got the chance?”
“Ouch.”, Lisa replied – the corners of her mouth turning upwards. “Bad Lisa.”
Jennie couldn’t suppress the grunt and the look she received from her best friend afterwards almost made her fall to the floor from laughing.
Oh the way Lisa could make her stomach ache in the best way possible with only one look. It was truly a talent.
It was only when her laughter had died down and they were both sitting on her bed cross-legged that Lisa became quieter and her face more serious.
“Are you really not going to tell me?”, she then asked – voice clear and attentive, her eyes fixated on the other girls’.
Jennie didn’t have to think twice – of course. She was always going to tell her. How could she not? Lisa was the only one who knew about this – well, the only one who knew everything. From the first drawing when she was six, to the second drawing when she was seven, up to the first computer written short letter when she was ten, to last year when the letter was twice as long as in the beginning and with words so beautiful it made Jennie tear up just thinking about it now.
Lisa had also been the one suggesting that this someone was in love with her big time when Jennie had always thought that it was just a sweet thing someone was doing out of kindness.
And Lisa had been there when Jennie admitted that these letters she would get every year on Valentines’ day weren’t just letters to her anymore – that she felt something when reading them. That she felt connected to their writer, somehow.
“They asked.”, she mumbled, suddenly feeling shy but not knowing why. They had talked about this – last year when Lisa had groaned after reading the newest letter, complaining about how Jennie’s ‘secret lovebug’ – as Lisa liked to call them – hadn’t had the guts to ask her out or reveal their identity yet.
And maybe Jennie had agreed a little bit – she’d told Lisa that she kind of liked this ‘not knowing’-thing.
Of course her best friend had laughed her in the face and told her she was a lost cause, and maybe she was – because she felt like a hypocrite right now, her body betraying her with how nervous she was about the possibility to know who had been writing her these letters for all those years.
It was quiet for a few moments, before Lisa spoke and – not for the first time – Jennie wondered what was going on inside her head.
And her heart – maybe she wondered about that too sometimes.
“Oh, cool.”, she said quietly, staring into the distance – face unusually hard.
“Cool?”, Jennie repeated slowly – trying to meet those deer-brown orbs that had been so joyful only seconds ago.
“Yeah. It’s cool. Right?”
“Right. Yeah.”, the older one answered – because yes, it was cool – but when their eyes met again, Jennie had to gulp down the lump that was starting to form in her throat and she wondered just what had brought about this change that now made it so hard to breathe.
The air was stiff in the room and so was Lisa who seemed to have found a huge interest in her fingernails all of a sudden.
“Lisa…”, Jennie started – but as soon as her pleading tone was audible, the other girl stood, gesturing to the bedroom door.
“I should go.”, she said – voice as low as her head and Jennie’s mood.
“I have… I’ve got somewhere to be.”
She pursed her lips before glancing up at Jennie almost shyly and the shorter one once again didn’t know what caused her stomach to drop at the sight.
“Have fun tonight, Nini. I really think you should meet them. They seem to like you very much.”
The door closed behind her with a loud thud and Jennie stood there for the better of ten seconds before she blinked slowly and grabbed the letter from her back pocket again.
She folded it open and read the last section again.
If it’s cool with you, I’d like to invite you to dinner tonight.
8 p.m. at Kondo’s diner.
With all the most honest and deep love,
Your secret admirer
Jennie felt tears forming in her eyes.
She’d been so sure. Up until moments ago.
That it was Lisa.
And now she wasn’t anymore. And she really didn’t want to find out who it was, if it wasn’t Lisa.
So maybe it would be best to just stay home. Right?