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Stella watches as Beatrix sends a bolt of electricity towards one of the specialists. He escapes the blast by only a fraction, and in the time it takes him to recentre himself, Beatrix is already centred and sending another his way that he can’t avoid. He loses his staff, and it lands between them.
He falls to the ground but is quick to push himself back up, still being in the circle they’d set as the boundary for this match.
Stella watches as the wind blows Beatrix’s ponytail over her shoulder, revealing the thin scar that sits across the nape of Beatrix’s neck, a reminder of what almost was. Sometimes… often, Stella wishes she had the magic to take those pains away.
Beatrix rushes forward and grabs the staff. She slides her other hand down it, igniting it with electricity. The specialist dances around the next few swings, though Stella can see the fear in his eyes at being hit by it.
He slides to the edge and grabs the spare staff, meeting her hit for hit. Beatrix was never one to play fair. She slides on her knees and swings at his legs, sending him to the ground with a shock.
‘Point to Beatrix!’ Saul declares. ‘That’s a match.’
Stella smiles and cheers. She watches as Beatrix moves to Saul’s side to discuss her win. Realistically, Stella should be ecstatic. Beatrix was still alive and not only that, she’d become an excellent fighter, surpassing the specialist ranks at a rate few had done before.
But Stella can see what’s unsaid. She notices the way Beatrix looks away from Saul, her thoughts miles away. When Beatrix had healed all those months ago, Stella had asked her if she’d like to find her sisters. Beatrix had said she couldn’t leave so easily. Not after everything that had happened.
Leaving would have been easier than risking injuries each day.
Eventually, Beatrix finishes her discussion with Saul and walks over to Stella, dropping down on the bench beside her. She nudges Stella with her elbow. ‘How was that?’
Stella hands her a bottle of water and pushes a few strands of hair off her face that had started to stick. ‘You’re brilliant. The way you ignited the staff was particularly impressive.’
Beatrix takes a sip. ‘You say, sounding unimpressed.’
Stella places a hand on Beatrix’s knee. ‘I am, I promise you.’ She looks down, frowning at the bruise that sits on Beatrix’s forearm. ‘I just hate to see you hurt.’
Beatrix sighs and leans her head against Stella’s shoulder. ‘You worry too much, princess. A few bruises as compensation for the damage I’ve done? There isn’t a comparison.’
Stella looks up and moves her hand to wrap around Beatrix’s shoulder, holding her close. She watches as two specialists step up onto the platform and start a sparring match. ‘You don’t have to make up for what Sebastian did.’
Beatrix sighs, her hand resting loosely on Stella’s thigh. ‘Don’t I?’
Stella thinks back on all of the ways Beatrix has tried to prove herself. Some of the students and teachers were forgiving, the others bitter and distant. It didn’t matter. Stella knew that Beatrix was good, or at least trying to be. ‘No,’ she finally responds.
Beatrix doesn’t answer and Stella doesn’t demand one. Their lives had become awfully complicated in such a short period of time. Answers weren’t found as easily as they used to be.
Stella watches each match and laughs along with Beatrix as Riven and Musa take to the platform, flirting far more than duelling. It seems to work to Musa’s advantage. Within five minutes Riven is pinned and conceding his loss.
Eventually, their quiet bubble, where they can just be two friends, pops. Saul calls Beatrix over for another match and all Stella can do is watch as she’s flipped, hit and all manner of things. Beatrix wins far more than she loses, but each loss has Stella cringing.
She should leave. She had plenty of studying to do and shouldn’t just be sitting out here watching specialist matches. If it had been Sky, she’d probably have already departed. With Beatrix, though? She finds herself unable to pull herself away. It seems the term ‘friends’ had started to become ill-fitting. She refused to tell Beatrix that. The last thing she needed was the burden of Stella’s out-of-control emotions.
So, she watches Beatrix win and lose, cheering her on in both scenarios. If there was anything that had become abundantly clear since what happened with Sebastian, it’s that Beatrix was an incredible fighter, in both resilience and adaptability.
Stella just wishes this wasn’t the way she found that out.
After an hour of matches, Beatrix is freed by Saul. Her eyes widen in what looks to be a surprise, and she walks over to Stella’s side. ‘You’re still here.’
Stella feels her cheek flush as she reaches for the water bottle. ‘I, um, enjoyed watching the fights.’
Beatrix smirks, accepting the water bottle, ‘Did anything else catch your fancy?’
Stella averts her eyes. ‘Nothing more than the thrills of combat.’
Beatrix laughs but seems to take pity on her, placing her spare hand on Stella’s shoulder. ‘I’m only teasing, princess, I’m glad you stayed.’
Stella turns to face Beatrix. ‘You are?’
‘Yeah,’ Beatrix confirms, reaching down for Stella’s hand and pulling her off the bench. ‘It’s nice to have someone cheering for me.’
Stella grabs the small towel she’d started to bring to these matches and gently dabs it against Beatrix’s forehead.
Beatrix rolls her eyes, but her smile is obvious. ‘You know, I can’t really be that sweaty and gross.’
Stella smiles and presses it against the nape of Beatrix’s neck, carefully avoiding touching the scar too hard. ‘Perhaps not, but I hardly hear you complaining.’
Stella moves the towel to the side of Beatrix’s neck, sliding it down. Beatrix catches her hand, holding her in place. ‘Perhaps I simply enjoy a princess pampering me.’
Stella laughs, her thumb brushing against Beatrix’s neck. ‘Here I am, breaking the tropes of princesses each day.’ She lowers the towel from Beatrix’s neck and places it in the laundry basket just outside the changing room for specialists.
Beatrix squeezes her hand before opening the door. ‘I think you broke every last one when you chose to remain friends with me.’ She walks in and finds her locker. ‘I’ll see you at dinner?’
‘See you,’ Stella whispers, watching as Beatrix pulls the door shut behind her, already starting to pull her shirt off. Stella bites her lip and quickly turns the other way, heading back to her suite to pick up her books. She supposes she should actually study and… avoid the feelings that spurred in her chest at seeing that.
Yes. Studying.
She hurries to her suite and pushes her feelings aside. The last thing she needed was for them to finally reach the surface.
With the suite thankfully empty, she picks up her book on fairy history and her writing supplies and heads into the library, finding her favourite study nook.
She’s halfway through her notes on the wars of fairy history when someone taps their hand against her shoulder. Perhaps Beatrix had found her? She turns to face her, a wide smile on her face and her name on her lips.
Except it isn’t Beatrix at all.
‘Expecting someone else?’ Queen Luna questions.
Stella purses her lips and taps her pen against her desk. ‘No. No one in particular.’
Queen Luna slides into the seat across from Stella, making it clear that she wasn’t just here to politely greet her and leave. How simply awful of her.
Stella scribbles a few more notes in her notebook but her mother seems to be painfully resolute in her position of having a conversation with her. She sighs and drops her pen against her notebook. ‘What is it, mother?’
Queen Luna reaches across the table but Sella is quick to slide her hands under the table, preventing her from touching her.
Queen Luna sighs, her hand suspended in the air. When Stella doesn’t move, she pulls it back. ‘I see you still have your qualms with me.’
Stella huffs, directing her gaze at the wall. ‘Qualms doesn’t even begin to cover my feelings towards you.’
She listens to the sharp breath her mother takes but still refuses to look at her. When she shifts in her chair, Stella relents and looks towards her. ‘What?’
Queen Luna rubs her index finger and thumb against the bridge of her nose. ‘One day you will understand, Stella. As future Queen of Solaria-’
Stella narrows her eyes. ‘I told you, mother if you make me choose, they will always come first.’
Queen Luna presses her hands against the table. ‘That is why I have visited you today.’
Stella’s lips turn down. ‘To make me choose?’
Queen Luna sighs. ‘Stella, I am not here to harm you in spite of what you may believe of me.’ She pulls out a piece of paper from the pocket of her jacket. ‘With the coming,’ she pauses, ‘Decisions, around the Blood Witches, I believe you, as my daughter, should be kept safe.’ She holds the paper out between them.
Stella frowns but with little choice, she accepts the paper and carefully unfolds it.
Queen Luna speaks as she reads it. ‘You deserve a personal guard that has your best interests at heart.’
Stella reads it. A personal guard. Her guard. She was no fool, Sky had meant to be that. It had taken her a long time to realise their relationship had been based heavily on that arrangement rather than love.
She didn’t need another relationship. Another farce with a man she couldn’t love. She wasn’t sure if they were any men in the world that she could.
She opens her mouth to retort, to say she needn’t a loveless relationship. What she needed was for her mother to be her mother. Queen Luna places her hand on top of Stella’s. ‘Please, read the letter before you shout or deny this of me.’
Stella sighs and continues to read. ‘I hereby, as Queen and Sovereign of Solaria, assign Beatrix as the princesses’ royal guard from this moment henceforth.’
Stella rereads it a few times just to make sure she hadn’t made it up. When the fifth re-read still shows Beatrix’s name in her mother’s writing, she looks up, the question falling from her lips. ‘Beatrix?’
Queen Luna nods, a small smile on her lips. ‘I can see what a strong friendship you have. I have watched her grow amongst the specialists becoming a formidable fighter both on and off the field. She will serve you well.’
Stella feels her hand clench around the letter. ‘Serve? My friends should not serve me, mother.’
Queen Luna grips her hand, ‘You will understand when-’
Stella feels her eyes water and tugs her hand out of her mother’s, rising from the table. ‘When what, mother? You still see friendship as only purposeful when it’s bound in servitude. I don’t believe I will ever understand that.’
Queen Luna looks around, her eyes narrowing. ‘Be reasonable, Stella. I will request her to my office tonight and if she agrees, there is little that you can do.’
Stella huffs and pulls her books off the table. ‘There is always something that can be done.’
She walks away from her mother and refuses to look back. Her mother doesn’t call her name, or follow her. She supposes they’re at an impasse where her mother strives to ensure that friendship becomes foreign to Stella.
She refuses to allow it.
When she leaves the library, she searches for Beatrix. She searches the specialist locker room, her suite, and the dining hall. Beatrix was somehow nowhere to be found.
She types a text instead. ‘Where are you?’ No. Too demanding. ‘My mother is looking for you and-’ she huffs and hits the delete button. What could she even say? She settles on something generic. ‘How are you?’ She hits send feeling every bit embarrassed that those were the only words she could conjure.
Beatrix doesn’t respond and she wonders if somehow how mother had found her first. She tries not to worry but when a minute turns into five and five turns into thirty, she does.
It’s an hour later when she finally gets a text back from Beatrix. ‘Can we talk?’
They were the most dreaded words she could read. She takes an unsteady breath and texts Beatrix. ‘Yes.’
They meet outside of Beatrix’s suite and walk with no particular destination in mind, turning down halls when needed. Beatrix finally speaks when the only way they can keep walking is to go outside. ‘I agreed.’
Stella doesn’t need to ask what she agreed on. She leans against the wall and rubs her eyes. ‘Why? I don’t need you to serve me, and you don’t have to work for my mother. Not after Aster Dell.’
Beatrix moves closer and reaches for her hands, holding them both. ‘This isn’t about your mother.’
Stella grits her teeth, looking down at their hands. ‘How isn’t it? She came to you telling you to be my guard, did she not?’
Beatrix sighs. ‘She did.’
Stella pulls her close, holding her hands up to her chest. ‘Why, Beatrix?’
Beatrix squeezes her hands. ‘Because with everything that has happened, we don’t know what comes next. If in my survival, I can ensure yours, I will do so.’
Stella's eyes water. ‘We can do that as friends, together.’
Beatrix releases her hands. ‘We both know it will be easier as your guard.’
Stella nods her head and wipes the tears from her eyes. ‘If that is what you wish, then I accept. But, please, if at any moment this harms our friendship, you stop.’
Beatrix smiles. ‘I can accept that.’
With a conversation that felt undone out of the way, they talk. Beatrix leads her out onto the school grounds to sit on a small bench meant for two pressed against the exterior wall.
She didn’t want this. She feared for their relationship of friendship and of… well, of the possibility of something more. But she equally didn’t want to force a choice on Beatrix. ‘So, what does my mother expect of you?’ She asks instead.
Beatrix crosses her legs. ‘Well, she’d like me to start training with some of the Solarian guards first. To prove myself or something. I wasn’t really listening to her much.’
Stella snorts. ‘You’re supposed to listen to something like that.’
Beatrix shrugs. ‘Turns out she enjoys having everything written. I have an envelope full of details.’ She pulls it out of her pocket. ‘I’ve read it. Or skimmed.’
Stella takes the envelope and looks through the details. Training with the royal guard, then field duty, before finally becoming Stella’s royal guard. She frowns at the mention of field duty. ‘What if she sends you up against blood witches?’
Beatrix reaches for Stella’s hand and rubs her thumb against the back of it. ‘We both know she will, but I have already faced them. Don’t worry about it, princess.’
Stella feels her smile quirk at the corner of her lips. ‘Know this. If you are to become my guard, I will worry about you endlessly each moment you are and aren’t at my side.’
Beatrix leans her head back against the wall. ‘Having you worry about me?’ She tilts her head to look at Stella. ‘Sounds like the opposite of a problem.’
She just knew Beatrix was going to be her most insufferable and enjoyable guard yet. She had many over the years, with Sky having been the latest. As frightened as she was for Beatrix’s safety, there was a certain joy in knowing she would be by her side.
They spend another hour on that bench, talking idly about what was to come. Beatrix would become a member of the Solarian guard and the future of themselves and Alfea was uncertain.
Stella won’t deny that after a quiet dinner with Beatrix and her suitemates, she enters her room restless, trying to process what had transpired.
Beatrix had willing joined the Solarian guard under the claim of protecting Stella. Stella may not have the most battle-ready magic, but if Beatrix plans to protect her, then she shall protect her equally.
She would become Beatrix’s guard, if only in secret.
She falls asleep with that thought in mind and the hope for a tomorrow where she can remain by Beatrix’s side.
She wakes to a text from Beatrix informing her that she wouldn’t be able to share breakfast with her. The Solarian guards she was to train with had arrived at 5 am to start training at 6. ‘Absolutely torturous,’ Beatrix had texted. ‘I expect a comfortable spot at lunch.’
Stella smiles and sends her a quick text. ‘I promise it will be the most comfortable one in the dining hall.’
She didn’t expect a response. With the way she’d seen the Solarian guard train in the palace, it was from early morning to the afternoon with little time for breaks. She stops the irrational part of herself that wants to rush out in her pyjamas and find Beatrix to ensure she’s being treated well and is doing okay.
The looks she suspects she’d receive from her suitemates are enough to stop her.
Instead, she dresses and takes on the day, waiting for lunch to come so that she could verify that Beatrix was okay.
Several classes later, many spent with an empty seat at her side, it’s finally lunch time. Stella isn’t normally one to rush or run down the halls, but she may have broken that rule, just this once.
She scours the dining hall for a spot to sit, and to her surprise, finds Beatrix had already found one, with her suitemates sitting around it.
Beatrix smiles at her and waves her over.
Stella is quick to bridge the distance between them, immediately sitting at Beatrix’s side, sliding her hand into Beatrix’s and squeezing it. ‘Are you injured? Did they treat you well?’
Beatrix smiles at her, the amusement clear on her face. ‘Stella, relax.’
It’s then that Stella is reminded that her suitemates are sitting around them.
Flora leans forward, her gaze flicking between the two. ‘So, what’s got Stella so worried?’
Terra smiles widely, muttering to herself about whatever she was seeing between them.
Stella makes a small sound and clears her throat, hoping to reduce any flush that was forming in her cheeks. ‘We, um,’ she pauses. How does she even begin to explain this?
Beatrix squeezes her hand. ‘I’m training with the Solarian royal guard to become Stella’s personal guard.’
Or… she could just say that.
They all break out into conversation over that. Each girl speaks over the top of the other, demanding answers while simultaneously congratulating them. Or so it seemed.
When they all quiet down, Aisha speaks first. ‘So, how’d this happen?’
Beatrix answers again. ‘I’m making up for the mistakes I made during the last term.’
Aisha bites her lip. ‘Oh. Well, that’s very noble of you.’
Stella nudges herself closer to Beatrix, their arms brushing against each other. Stella watches as Beatrix pushes a smile onto her face and thanks Aisha. Stella knew the truth. Beatrix didn’t see any of this as noble. She didn’t see standing against what could be her family as noble. She saw it as a duty she must fulfil, to make up for what she had already made up for.
She wishes Beatrix would start doing things for herself, for her life, and for what she hopes to be. She doesn’t want it to be for the wishes of those older and carrying years of ill-made decisions.
Still, there was a sense of pride in the way Beatrix speaks about her training. She mentions how she took down no less than three of the Solarian guards, claiming they fight too uniformly and never expect her swings or magic.
Stella laughs along and holds Beatrix close as she revels in the stories of her day. When the rest of her suitemates leave, Stella checks her for bruises or injuries and finds none.
She can only wish for every day to be the same as this one. Though, she could do without the way her heart races as Beatrix leans in, allowing her to check her shoulders and confirm they too were uninjured. At least she thinks they were. With Beatrix being so close, her only thought was to stop herself from leaning in and-
And nothing. She couldn’t risk their friendship with these thoughts.
Instead, she continues to watch and yearn. She yearns for more between them as equally as she yearns for Beatrix’s safety and the promise that she would return from training the same way she entered. For her skin to be unmarred, her smile to remain unwavering, and her touch to be still just as soothing.
Perhaps she should have thought about it a little more. A week passes and she sits with Beatrix under a willow tree, a handful of sandwiches they’d taken from the dining hall sitting in containers between them.
Beatrix leans back against the tree. ‘Training was interesting today. I spoke to one of the guards, hmm I can’t remember her name, but she said something interesting.’
Stella folds her legs beneath her and takes a bite of her sandwich. ‘Oh? Please do tell.’
Beatrix smirks, picking up her sandwich. ‘She told me you have a crush on someone.’
Stella feels her cheeks flush. She supposes she talked to the female guards often, even recently. She wanted someone neutral to discuss all of her feelings with. Perhaps those feelings were about Beatrix and she had gone into lengthy detail describing how beautiful she was. She hopes they hadn’t told Beatrix it was about her.
She takes another bite of her sandwich and swallows with an awkward laugh. ‘Oh, really? They do enjoy gossiping.’
Beatrix’s smirk falls, turning into something softer. ‘Do I know her?’
Stella lowers her gaze. If she were to her tell the truth, she’d say you know them very well. A mirror would suffice as an answer. She doesn’t. She smiles, looks over at the school, and tells her, ‘Perhaps you do.’
They sit in silence for a few minutes, finishing their sandwiches before Beatrix speaks up. ‘One day I’d like to meet her. You know, to make sure I’m doing my guard duties well.’
She needn’t do anything. She was already exceptional. Stella smiles, ‘I am hopeful that day will come.’
They part half an hour later, having chosen to spend the rest of their time discussing Beatrix’s training at length. Beatrix agrees to allow her to watch during their afternoon training and Stella walks by Beatrix’s side, only splitting away when she moves to grab her gear.
Stella watches with wide eyes and little gasps as Beatrix avoids the hits of the other Solarian guards by mere inches, launching a counter-attack that has them stumbling. She does it again and again without fail. Stella cringes each time, fearing injury.
She hears a voice beside her, breaking her out of her focus. ‘She does well amongst them. Better than some of our best lieutenants.’
Stella turns, giving her mother her attention. ‘Yes, she’s amazing.’ She tries to limit her praise. If her mother was watching the training, it was always because she planned to use the guards soon.
She’s proven right with her mother’s next words. ‘I have heard the news of Blood Witches in the east. A small group has been gathering numbers and possibly weapons to use against us fairies. We must strike before they do.’
Stella returns her gaze to Beatrix, watching her take down one of the guards. ‘So you’re suggesting Beatrix joins them.’
Queen Luna places her hand on Stella’s shoulder, squeezing a bit tighter than was comfortable. ‘I am not suggesting, Stella, I am informing.’
Of course, she shouldn’t have expected anything less from her. ‘I see,’ Stella breathes out.
She balls her hands and tries to keep her focus on Beatrix. Her mother had made a choice and she was trapped in that choice, only able to support Beatrix.
When Beatrix finishes her match, Queen Luna waves her over. ‘Beatrix.’
Beatrix tucks her hands behind her back. ‘Queen Luna.’
Queen Luna smiles and reaches forward, patting her forearm. ‘You have fought with strength and tactics that many could only wish to hold. I will be deploying my guards to face our threat tomorrow and I expect you to be within their ranks.’
Stella whips her head to look at her mother. Tomorrow? She hadn’t said tomorrow.
Beatrix shifts on her feet, looking down at Stella for a moment, her eyes showing the same worry Stella was experiencing. ‘So soon?’
‘Yes,’ Queen Luna confirms, stepping away from Beatrix. ‘I believe you are ready.’
A part of Stella, the kind of part that was irrational and slightly lovesick, wishes that Beatrix would never be ready. It would mean she wouldn’t be deployed, and she wouldn’t have to leave Stella and Alfea for her mother’s missions.
Stella watches as her mother starts to walk away. ‘I need to inform Saul of this. Perhaps you two should say your goodbyes. There is no guarantee that this will be a short mission.’
Stella looks over at Saul who nods, giving her the okay to leave. She’s quick to rise from where she’s seated and reach for Beatrix’s hand, pulling her along.
She’s halfway down a hall when Beatrix tugs her arm, pulling her to a stop.
Stella huffs out a breath and looks resolutely away, She fears that if she looks at Beatrix, she’ll crumble and say everything that’s on her mind and more.
Beatrix walks ahead, standing in front of her. She places a hand on Stella’s cheek. ‘Hey, hey, what’s going on?’
She hates the way her eyes prick at the question. ‘You’re going to be deployed, to fight blood witches of all things.’
Beatrix rubs her thumb against her cheek. ‘Let’s talk about it, maybe not directly in the hall, though.’
Stella nods and allows herself to be led back to her suite and lowered onto the couch. She barely perceives the presence of her suitemates scattered around the common area, being too focused on Beatrix.
Beatrix slides her fingers under Stella’s jaw, turning her to face her. ‘Please talk to me.’
Stella sniffs, hating the way her tears fall against her will. She’d seen the states some of the Solarian guards would return to their quarters in. Unhealed wounds, broken bones, or one less than they’d left with.
She feared all of those with Beatrix. She was brilliant and cunning but that didn’t change the fact that those blood witches could be equally so.
She wipes her eyes as she feels an arm wrap around her shoulder, she turns and meets Musa’s worried eyes.
She voices her fears when she turns back to Beatrix. ‘What if you get hurt?’
Beatrix slides her hand down to rest against Stella’s neck. ‘Then I’ll get better.’
Stella lifts her hands, pressing them to her eyes. How many times could she watch Beatrix get hurt to protect her? What she did with Sebastian was more than enough. Even too much, considering the months of healing.
Musa pushes a tissue into Stella’s hand and leans forward, directing her question to Beatrix. ‘What’s going on here? Why is Stella crying?’
Beatrix sighs and pulls back, settling on holding Stella’s hand instead. ‘Queen Luna believes I’m proficient.’
Stella lifts the tissue, wiping her eyes. She watches as Musa’s eyes narrow. ‘Okay, Queen Luna complimenting you wouldn’t make Stella cry.’
Beatrix squeezes Stella’s hand as she looks around the room at each of Stella’s suitemates before answering. ‘She wants me deployed on a mission. Tomorrow. Well, want is the wrong word. I will be deployed tomorrow.’
Musa slides her hand down, rubbing Stella’s back. ‘Will the two of you be alright with this?’
Stella bites her lip. She knows her crying is her answer. No. She would absolutely not be okay with this.
Beatrix uses her spare hand to brush a few loose strands of hair out of Stella’s eyes. She tilts Stella’s head so that they would be looking at each other once more. ‘I will admit, I am afraid. I fear that on the battlefield I’ll meet my sisters or someone who is or once was, family.’ Beatrix sniffs. ‘But more than anything, I will be okay, because I will return and,’ she pushes a smirk onto her face, ‘I expect all of the praise.’
Terra groans at Beatrix’s last words. ‘Really?’
Beatrix laughs. ‘Would a little praise be that Terra-ble?’
Stella snorts as Beatrix enunciates Terra’s name, watching as the nature fairy rolls her eyes at Beatrix, a smile on her face. ‘I suppose it could Bea worse.’
Stella’s laughter turns to exasperation. If her pushing for her suitemates to bond with Beatrix leads to more of these terrible puns she’s rescinding that decision. Still, at this moment it was nice to laugh, despite knowing what tomorrow would bring.
They spend the next few hours talking through their worries. Beatrix inches closer and closer, and Stella’s cheeks flush brighter. By the end of the night, Beatrix was almost in Stella’s lap, with her arm wrapped around Stella’s waist. If only she could just say ‘I like you!’ or anything that would give Stella an indication that these touches were more than friendship.
When it’s time to leave, Stella walks Beatrix back to her suite, knowing it’s the last time she’d see her for who knows how long.
She holds Beatrix’s hands and holds back everything she wants to admit. ‘I’ll, um, I’ll miss you, you know that?’
Beatrix smiles, squeezing her hands. ‘Careful there, princess, you’re halfway there to a compliment.’
Stella shakes her head. ‘Your amazing, Beatrix. I’ll always have compliments for you.’
Beatrix lowers her head. ‘I’ll miss you too, Stella.’
Stella throws away her propriety and pulls Beatrix in for a hug, she feels the way Beatrix’s arms slowly snake around her back before settling there. ‘You return in one piece, you hear me?’ She sniffs. ‘I haven’t the time to find another guard.’
Beatrix laughs, though Stella can hear the unsteadiness of her voice. ‘Perish the thought, don’t you dare replace me while I’m away.’
Stella takes a deep breath and presses her cheek against Beatrix’s, feeling the wetness that hits her own. ‘I promise.’
They pull away with watery eyes and promise on their tounges. Beatrix would return and Stella would wait for her for however long it takes.
Stella returns to her suite without Beatrix and after waving off her suitemates with the promise that she would be okay, she heads to bed knowing she’d wake to a Beatrix-less Alfea.
When morning calls, she takes longer than usual to wake up. She checks her phone and reads Beatrix’s goodbye message. She wipes her now wet eyes and texts Beatrix, ‘I’ll see you again soon.’
That message sits there for the day and the next. When the third day comes, Stella feels tension pulling at every inch of her body. Realistically she knew Solarian missions could last this long. That doesn’t mean she has to accept it.
In the afternoon, she finally hears the familiar tune of the Solarian army song and rushes outside to meet them.
She pushes through some of the guards with apologies on her lips, searching for Beatrix. Finally, she finds her in the middle, her helmet under her arm.
‘Beatrix,’ she whispers, moving to her side and wrapping her arms around her.
Beatrix immediately presses her face into the crook of Stella’s neck and wraps her arms around her as the other guards walk past them. ‘Are you hurt?’ She questions.
Beatrix pulls back, a smile on her face as she reaches up and grazes her hand along Stella’s cheek. ‘I’m okay.’
Stella nods, feeling relief flood her. She’s okay. She’s alive. She’s home. She reaches for Beatrix’s hand and leads her inside. ‘My suitemates agreed to give us some space, they’ll be out for the next few hours.’
Beatrix’s voice breaks as she speaks, worn from the battle. ‘Lead the way, princess.’
She gently leads Beatrix down the halls and into the suite before pulling her into her bedroom and sitting with her on her bed.
She places her hands on Beatrix’s cheeks and assesses her for new wounds, finding none to mention aside from a small bruise on her neck. She finds her eyes wandering more than a few times to Beatrix’s lips but forces them back up each time. ‘Let me help you with your armour.’
Beatrix smiles and places her hands on top of Stella’s. ‘I can do it.’
Stella shakes her head. ‘Please allow me, after three days it’s the least I can do for you.’
Beatrix nods and Stella begins her work of slowly getting Beatrix out of her armour. She unbuckles the shoulder braces and places them to the side. Each gauntlet slides off, giving her the access she needs to take the main chest piece off leaving her only in armoured pants and a tank top.
She frows as she notices the slight bump under the shirt at Beatrix’s waist. ‘You said you weren’t injured.’
Beatrix’s lips lift into a sheepish smile. ‘It’s really not that bad.’
Stella frowns, Beatrix was willing to hide how bad her injury from Sebastian was. She didn’t trust it to be the truth. Carefully she lifts Beatrix’s shirt, revealing the slightly bloodied bandage underneath.
Her hands shake as she takes in the sight of it. ‘This isn’t bad?’
Beatrix lowers her head, placing her hand against the wound. ‘It’s healing, we were just in a rush and I haven’t had the time to redress it.’
Stella feels her eyes water as her hands graze the bandage. ‘What happened?’
She looks up, seeing the way Beatrix’s tears fall. ‘A blood witch got too close,’ Beatrix admits, rubbing the bandage. ‘I, perhaps they were no one.’ She lifts her hand wiping away her tears as her lip wobbles. ‘But they were young, Stella, I could tell and I was so afraid that under their armour I’d find my sister. I hesitated, foolishly and dangerously, I hesitated.’
Stella pulls Beatrix into her arms, rubbing her back as she sobs. ‘You’re not foolish for caring.’
Beatrix sniffs. ‘How can I be your guard if I hesitate? What if it gets you hurt?’
Stella rubs the back of her neck. ‘So be it. I’d rather be hurt than lose you at my side. I refuse to force you to forget who you are.’
Beatrix’s hands shake against her back. ‘What if one day I’m on the other side of this fight?’
Stella presses her chin against Beatrix’s shoulder. ‘Then I shall be with you.’
Beatrix pulls back, a frown on her face amidst her tears. ‘I could never ask that of you.’
Stella smiles. ‘As equally as I could never ask you to be my guard. Now, let me redress those wounds.’
Beatrix relents and Stella finds herself rubbing her thumbs under Beatrix’s eyes, clearing away her tears. She feels her breathing become unsteady as Beatrix leans in, their lips only inches apart.
She flushes and pulls away. ‘I’ll just grab the medical kit.’
She rises from the bed without a glance back. Too close. Much too close.
She grabs the medical kit from under the sink and takes a deep breath. Do not ruin this with your feelings, Stella, she tells herself.
When she returns to the room, she finds Beatrix sitting on the edge of the bed, patiently waiting for her. Her feelings were getting out of control.
She knees down in front of Beatrix. ‘I’m just going to take this off, okay?’
Beatrix nods and Stella begins the task of carefully unwinding it all and setting it to the side. The wound was thankfully mostly healed, with only a small cut left in its place.
Beatrix places her hand under the shirt, keeping it up as Stella’s hands slide across her stomach to pull the gauze into place. After a few minutes, she pulls back and is happy to declare the job finished.
She looks up to Beatrix to inform her of the fact but finds the words stuck in her throat. The way Beatrix was looking at her was almost-
‘I have a confession to make,’ Beatrix whispers.
Stella slides her hands off Beatrix’s stomach, ‘What is it?’
Beatrix slides one of her hands under Stella’s chin, tilting her head up. ‘I believe I know who your crush is.’
Stella swallows and wets her lips. Perhaps the part of her that had missed Beatrix terribly drives her next words, but she cannot bring herself to care. ‘It’s you,’ she admits.
Beatrix leans down, her lips inches away from Stella’s. ‘I know.’ With those words, she closes the distance, pressing her lips against Stella’s.
Stella’s eyes widen as she processes what was happening. Beatrix was kissing her. Beatrix was- She closes her eyes and slides her hands up, tangling them into Beatrix’s hair. Beatrix sighs into the kiss and Stella pushes that bit further, leaning up to press herself into Beatrix.
She pulls away when Beatrix gasps, worried that she’d hurt her. ‘Are you okay?’ She finds herself asking.
Beatrix laughs and pulls her back in. ‘That wasn’t a pained sound.’
Stella is quick to catch on to her meaning as Beatrix pulls her up and into the bed. She’s careful to avoid getting too close, stopping herself from knocking into Beatrix’s wound.
She lies at Beatrix’s side, her hand against her hip and her lips pressing gently against her neck where the bruise sat. ‘I don’t think I can handle another injury on you.’
Beatrix sighs and rubs her back. ‘There will always be another. But never one that will stop me from coming back to you.’
Stella smiles, her fingers thumbing the edge of Beatrix’s shirt. ‘That’s a rather large promise.’
Beatrix returns the smile and leans forward. ‘It’s one I intend to keep.’ Her lips return to Stella and to every part of Stella she can reach. Stella sighs into each kiss but they don’t venture too far, cautious of Beatrix’s wound.
Stella pulls back and presses her hand to Beatrix’s cheek. ‘I love you.’
Beatrix’s cheeks flush. ‘You don’t know what you’re saying there, princess.’
Stella shakes her head, a fond smile on her face. ‘No, for the first time, I believe I do.’
She watches as Beatrix’s lips wobble and the same words tumble out of her mouth. ‘I love you too, princess.’
With those words, more than a few kisses are shared before it’s agreed that a shower is needed after returning from deployment. Beatrix refuses to shower first, claiming that Stella had already offered her plenty.
Stella rolls her eyes with a smile but agrees. She showers quickly and starts to search for some clothes for Beatrix. With no clean shirts or pants of her own, Stella rummages through her wardrobe for something Beatrix could wear. She settles on a pink button-down shirt that looks to be Beatrix’s size and some loose pants. They create a protection for the bandages to waterproof them for the shower.
She sits on the edge of her bed and waits.
When Beatrix returns to her room, the shirt hanging loosely off her shoulders, Stella finds herself having to force her mouth closed. ‘Did you know that you’re beautiful?’
Beatrix smiles and moves across the room, settling onto Stella’s lap, her legs on each side of Stella’s. She slides her hands up to Stella’s neck, ‘You should know how beautiful you are too, Stella.’
Stella smiles and rests her own hands against Beatrix’s hips. ‘Enlighten me.’
Beatrix answers with a kiss, slowly pulling Stella through the motions of it. Stella tightens her grip on Beatrix’s hips when Beatrix deepens the kiss. She groans and pulls back. ‘You’re injured.’
Beatrix shrugs. ‘I’m making up for the lost time.’
Stella closes her eyes and tries to centre herself. There was nothing she wanted more than to make up for all of the times she had told herself no. But, they could do so once Beatrix was healed.
She smiles instead. ‘Lie down with me.’
Beatrix pouts but concedes, lying by her side. Stella gently tugs her backwards, spooning her in her arms. ‘Will this suffice?’
Beatrix hums and pushes herself against Stella’s chest. ‘For now.’
They fall asleep soon after in each other's arms and awake to a message from Queen Luna, requesting their presence in her office.
It takes them slightly longer than it should for them to get dressed, sharing kisses between each item they pulled on. She finds Beatrix a black shirt amongst her clothes, sad to see the pink one go.
They walk together hand-in-hand to Queen Luna’s office. This time was different. They held hands in a way that represented more.
When they enter the office, Queen Luna gestures for them to sit on the couch in front of her. Queen Luna pushes a glass of water in front of them both and starts to speak. ‘I’ve called you both here to talk about Beatrix’s mission.’
Stella finds herself reaching for that glass and taking a large sip.
Queen Luna smiles and continues. ‘You did well, from what I hear, Beatrix.’ She pulls out a letter. ‘Which is why I intend for you to be officially Stella’s personal guard.’
Stella blinks. Beatrix was to be her guard? She turns to face her. ‘Are you sure you want this? I will never force this on you.’
Beatrix places her hand on Stella’s knee. ‘I’m sure. I’m doing this because I want to, Stella.’
Stella smiles. ‘Okay.’
Beatrix copies the action. ‘Okay.’
With those words, it becomes a reality. Beatrix was to be her guard and while not official, Stella would be hers. She would never allow Beatrix to be injured again if she had any say in it.
Once they leave the room, Beatrix smirks and kneels in front of her, reaching for her hand. ‘My princess.’
Stella laughs and accepts a kiss on her hand before pulling Beatrix up. ‘My guard.’ She slides her hand under Beatrix’s chin and pulls her in for a brief kiss. ‘My heart.’
Beatrix smiles and they walk back to the suite. It takes an hour but eventually, her suitemates are updated on the change of title and everything that happened during Beatrix’s deployment.
Stella holds her hand as she speaks, a smile on her face. She had not expected their relationship to ever lead to this. She had even feared that this change would result in Beatrix serving her and their friendship would be ruined.
This was far better. Each day would be a day they wake for each other. Whatever Beatrix gives her, she plans to give in return.
Never again would she allow someone to define Beatrix. They had each other and they would do this together.
Her guard, My guard. They had begun to mean the same thing.