Work Text:
Clutching the hotel pillow close to her chest, Sansa blinked up at the ceiling trying to slow down her heart rate. Her phone laid next to her, her notifications from her friends about her newest video gaining more views than the last. It had been just a little over a year since she had fled to King’s Landing. Just almost a year since her YouTube channel blew up, seemingly overnight, and since she had last seen him in person.
Getting away from Castle Black, a town in which more cows and sheep existed than the population of people, had been everything she ever wanted. The year away had been one of the best and worst years of her entire life. Career-wise it exceeded her expectations of what she thought she was even capable of, but personally it felt like it had rotted away. When she fled Castle Black, she had fled Jon. Her boyfriend of 4 years and fiancée for one, she appeared to have ended their long engagement with a fight and note. Now she was back in town looking for him and had no idea how he would react to her call.
When she had first broached the subject all her friends had told her, he had to have moved on. The ones close to her hometown reminded her of the redhead ex he had before her or the new owner of the farm from the next town over. The beautiful horseback rider extraordinaire who he had met at a conference. Margaery even reminded her of the pretty ice blonde writer who had bought an escape cottage down the road. About a month before she left, Sansa came home to find Jon and her talking on the porch about some book she had never read before, eating cookies the beautiful women had made.
Sansa approached her siblings, yet their opinions codirected her friends. Robb had been pissed at the relationship to begin with and Arya couldn’t stop telling her how selfish she had been. The word bitch and Sansa had been interlocked in her sister's mind since she moved to the city. Yet they all said the same thing, Jon Snow loves her and only her. Time wouldn’t change that fact even if he had to wait another twenty years. That Sansa doubted, no man could ever wait that long for a woman, no matter how great the love seemingly was.
At the time of her departure, she was a hollowed shell. Dying every day in that town unable to think about a future when all she dreamed of was trying to thrive in the metropolis of King’s Landing. When her youtube channel spiked to over 4 million subscriptions in three months and an agent called about sponsorship deals she had to take a chance. She had been caught in two different worlds, yet she still felt like didn’t belong to either of them. All of the success she had still felt hollow yet exciting all in the same breath. In a few short weeks she would head off to Essos to film her first movie. The role wasn't big, but it was the biggest accomplishment she had since her YouTube channel began. She convinced herself to see him one last time before she began the new adventure. Sansa needed to know if what they had was truly over and done with. She wouldn’t blame him, the only one to blame in this had been her.
Sitting up, she took in a deep breath grabbing the phone and dialing his home phone. She knew it would go to voicemail at this time if he had stuck to his old routines. Jon being the creature of habit ever since she knew him didn’t think he would change all that much in a year yet, Sansa also knew that despite being able to dial she wasn’t brave enough to hear his voice on the other end and produce words.
Her heart hammered away in her chest with each sound of the ring. She heard the click of the answering machine, his voice coming in loud and clear.
Hello, this is Jon Snow. If You’re wondering about the truck for sale, I sold it this weekend. If it’s Tuesday, I will be out, also I’m not buying anything you're selling. Anybody else please leave a message…oh and if this is Winterfell I still love you. *Beep* [At the tone please record your message]
Sansa held the phone tightly hearing the phone beep again for her to speak, yet no words came out. Clicking end without even making a noise her hand shook while tears wouldn’t stop coming.
How?
Why?
Who was he to love her so much?
She sank back into the bed, looking at the phone screen. It had been over a year with no contact, not even a text since she left him with a note and broken heart. Yet there could be no one else he would have called Winterfell.
When they had first met six years ago, a year before they began a relationship. When she stumbled into the bar after moving to Castle Black. Escaping the hell of her ex in a place no one would know her. She had slid next to him on the bar a seat down. Asking her where she was from and her being a smart ass replied he wouldn’t have heard about it.
Try me…
‘Winterfell’
‘Well Winterfell, do you have a name?’
‘Not at the moment.’
‘Winterfell it is.’
He even still would call her that from time to time, getting her attention at parties or with his friends. She hadn’t heard it in so long, even remembering the name made her cry.
Three days had passed since she had worked up enough courage to call him again and this time leave an actual message. Only with the support of her sister and a short text exchange with her brother Robb did she dare find the courage. Drowning herself in work is what got her into this mess.
Pacing back and forth in the room, she made it a point to call at night so he would be there to pick up the phone, but she still ended up with his voicemail again. In her hand she held the words she knew she was going to say.
Hello, you reached Jon Snow. If it’s Friday I’m at the Stadium and first thing tomorrow I am leaving for the lake. I won’t be back till Sunday night, but I’ll return your message as soon as I do. Also, if this is Winterfell, I still love you. *Beep*
Sansa felt her stomach drop, a heart race that she panicked when the phone beeped for a message. She swallowed before she rambled off, forgetting to read anything else she wrote down.
“Motel Black, room 604.” She ratted off before hanging up the phone. Eyes glued to the screen, she looked at the date with Sunday right in front of it. He could have been listening right then and there to her speak. She didn’t even say her name, just a room number. The odds of him thinking it was a drunk girl who dialed the wrong number were high, along with him just deleting the message.
Sansa decided she would stay at least until tomorrow night, then she would have her answer. Sitting on a chair, she listened softly to the TV blaring some rerun of Golden Dragons ignoring the buzzing from her phone. About 20 minutes had passed since she called when a knock rattled the motel’s door. She tripped over her legs bolting to the door to look out the peephole. A man’s back was to her, hands on his hips, black curly hair a mess and the red flannel he always wore. His shoulders were tight, and she could tell even from the back how the man seemed to be breathing deeply. Taking in her own shaky breath, Sansa opened the door wide, watching him turn around. He took a step back at the sight of her, a look of shock echoing in his dark gray eyes.
“Jon…I-” As soon as she spoke, he took two steps forward, wrapping a hand around the back of her neck and pulling her into a kiss, so deep and intense she felt like she was floating. But he broke it a few seconds later. Hands in the air, cheeks red with what appeared to be shame.
“I’m sorry, I should have asked. You might be seeing someone else. I just-” Sansa reached out grabbing him by the flannel and pulling him back into another bone crushing kiss. Pulling him into her room, she wrapped her arms around his neck holding him close.
“Sansa-” he whispered when she pulled away.
“I love you too.” She smiled, kissing him again, while he slammed the door closed.