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It wasn’t exactly the normal dinner conversation he and Jinki had. He wasn’t even sure how the topic had come up, it wasn’t something they’d ever mentioned to eachother. Key just wanted to enjoy the pasta he’d made and some quiet time with Jinki but apparently, Jinki had other ideas.
"You know you're the only one who can't see it, how much he loves you? It's so clear to everyone around you but you're blind to it. You've convinced yourself it'll never be true."
Key was silent.
"You're in denial."
"I am not in denial."
"Kibum. Stop for a second and think. Actually think about it. Think about everything he does for you, does he do that for anyone else? He's the only one who would show up at the crack of dawn to go to some art show with you, would come over on his one day off to help you tidy up your garden. He'd do anything for you,” Jinki pressed on. He was determined to get his point across. After over a decade, it was time.
"He's a nice person. He'd do that for anyone."
"No. No, this is what I mean. You refuse to see it when it's so clearly there. It's always been there, but you have completely convinced yourself there's zero probability of anything between the two of you and you're wrong."
"Jinki, I haven't-"
"Stop. Seriously. When was the last time Minho ever talked about someone he was seeing?"
"Can't remember," Key mumbled, he felt like a child getting told off.
"I lived with him a lot longer than you did. I heard about everything. He hasn't even gone on a date in like 3 years. Any ideas why?"
"I don't know, Jinki, okay? Quit it with the quizzing. He doesn't like me, he never will. I came to terms with it years ago, don't try to give me false hope, it's not fair.” It was a sensitive topic for Kibum. He had never really talked about it with anyone. Sure, Jonghyun had worked it out pretty quickly but they hadn’t ever really discussed Key’s very obvious crush. He knew Jinki had known for a while, and Taemin definitely didn’t have a clue. Outside the group, no one knew. At least, that’s what he thought, but according to Jinki that was incorrect.
"You don't get it. I’ve seen you both through every up and down you’ve ever had. I was there pulling you off eachother when you got into scraps in our trainee days, I’ve been there when you’ve both had a drink and are curled into eachother on the couch. I’ve seen both ends of the spectrum and everything in between, and everything you haven’t seen too. You don’t know the way he looks at you when you’re not watching. You haven’t seen his concentration when he’s monitoring you at a performance or the way I’ve caught him scrolling back through photos of the two of you. He always sets an alarm for when your new music video is released and has it up on the TV the second it’s released. He religiously watches Nolto every week just to see you. He spends hours searching online stores for the perfect present for you every birthday. He always came home and raved about whatever restaurant you’d taken him to, it was all I’d hear about for two days. Every second you’re together is just as precious to him as I know it is to you. Why can’t you accept that?” Jinki was almost mad that Kibum couldn’t see it. Everyone he was friends with within the company could see it; for someone who loved gossip, Key was clueless when it came to his own. It was so clear.
“It’s not going to happen, Jinki. Please stop pushing it. We’re just friends and I’ve accepted that and I’m okay with that. Yes, it hurts that I care about him that much and he doesn’t reciprocate but I don’t care. He’s my best friend and if that’s all I can have I’ll take it,” Key was exasperated now. Why was Jinki suddenly pushing this on him?
“I'm clearly not going to get through to you. But if you really do still have feelings for him, I'm telling you that you shouldn't keep them to yourself. It's not as one-sided as you think."
"Whatever, hyung," Key sighed, pushing himself out of his chair to head for the kitchen, “Dessert?”
“Sure.”
“And a different topic of conversation?”
“You can’t run from it forever, Kibum, but yes. Did you see that movie trailer that came out yesterday? The one with the aliens?”