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Fushiguro Megumi doesn’t get hugs.
It’s not that he doesn’t like them. It’s not that he doesn’t want them. It’s just that he doesn’t get them.
He can’t actually remember the last time somebody hugged him. It’s silly, really, that he’s upset that he doesn’t remember the last time somebody wrapped their arms around him and pulled him close. But he can’t, no matter how far back he goes as he sifts through his memories.
He can remember watching other people hug. He remembers Gojo hugging Tsumiki after picking them up from school. He remembers Okkotsu-senpai hugging the second years (first years at the time) as he left for Africa. He remembers Yuuji hugging Nobara when he returned from the dead.
And he remembers standing on the sidelines of every one of those hugs, wishing it was him being pulled in to a warm embrace, his head resting on another person’s chest, listening to their heart beat.
“Hugs are for girls” were the words Fushiguro Toji spat the first (and last) time he asked. He’d had a nightmare, and was standing in their living room as his father sipped at a beer and watched the horses. He’d just wanted to be comforted, to be told that ‘it’s okay’ and ‘the monsters aren’t coming’. But instead he’d been sent away, feeling cold and lonely and empty.
He’d avoided hugs from Tsumiki after that, pushing her away with a huff and a muttered “hugs are for girls”. She’d been hurt at first, confused as to why her little brother didn’t want to hug her anymore, but she’d stopped trying after the fifth or sixth time.
“Megumi doesn’t like hugs.” was what she’d told Satoru Gojo when he’d attempted to hug him after they moved in to his apartment. They’d just finished painting his room, and he was so proud of what a good job he’d done. The man, who he’d only known for a couple of weeks, had gone to hug him, and, even though Megumi had tensed, he’d been ready to accept it. Until Tsumiki hurriedly put a hand on the white-haired man’s shoulder, whispering those awful words.
He’d cried himself to sleep that night.
“Megumi-chan doesn’t do hugs.” Gojo had told the other first years after they’d finished their first mission. He’d watched as Yuuji hugged Gojo, then an unwilling Nobara, before turning to him with a grin and a thumbs up. “Good job, Fushiguro!” He’d exclaimed, and Megumi had just smiled, ignoring the way his eyes burned.
The moment he truly gave up on being on the receiving end of a hug was after the Kyoto school exchange. The first years and second years alike had joined together in a group hug, Megumi stood on the outskirts with his hands in his pockets. It hurt, seeing them together, enjoying each others’ embrace, but he’d said nothing, Toji’s voice ringing in his ears.
Then Shibuya happens. And Megumi realises one night, alone in his bed, that he’ll never get the chance to feel one of Gojo’s hugs. They’d always looked so warm, so inviting. But he’s gone, maybe forever, and Megumi feels a little colder when he realises he’s never been embraced by the man who raised him.
The Culling Game happens, and he doesn’t think about hugs for a long time. He’s too alone, too focused on fixing this mess and getting Gojo out of the box and helping Tsumiki that it doesn’t even cross his mind. Until one night, when he realises, taking shelter in an abandoned family home that feels a little too familiar, that he was four the last time he hugged his sister.
Not for the first time, he cries himself to sleep, arms wrapped around himself, pretending he’s being held.
They find the Angel, and as a group they fight. They almost lose Yuuji to her deal. Americans get involved and suddenly there’s more than just Kenjaku and curses to deal with. But they win. Gojo is freed, Yuuji is alive, and Nobara meets them back at Jujutsu High, head held high.
The group mourn their losses hard, but they celebrate harder. There’s a party, and everyone left standing attends. There’s alcohol and food and people who have never met before talk and dance and hug and Megumi just watches.
It’s Choso, Yuuji’s brother, who approaches where he’s stood, alone. He grins at him, before wrapping his arms around Megumi and pulling him in for a hug. And Megumi barely knows the man, but what he does know is it’s the best feeling he’s ever experienced, and he sinks in to the warm embrace, tears pooling in his eyes as every missed opportunity, every moment of loneliness, every time he stood on the sidelines comes flooding back in a whirlpool of emotions.
“Choso!” Yuuji calls, and just like that it’s over, and Megumi is cold again and he feels pathetic as he watches his arms reach out without his permission, already missing the contact. “Shit, dude. Sorry, I should have said. Fushiguro doesn’t do hugs.” the pink-haired boy tells him, and Megumi’s heart shatters.
They turn away, Yuuji talking about how he’s going to introduce Choso to Gojo, but not before Megumi whispers “I never said that.”, and Yuuji freezes.
“What?” He asks, turning around, almost in slow motion like he’s in some sort of romcom and Megumi just confessed his undying love.
“I never said I don’t like hugs.” Megumi repeats, and he’s embarrassed. He’s not asking for a hug, he reasons with himself, he’s just correcting misinformation. Twelve years of misinformation.
Yuuji frowns, like he’s contemplating every interaction he’s ever had with Megumi, and for a terrible moment Megumi thinks he’s going to laugh at him.
He doesn’t.
“Do… do you want a hug, Megumi?” the boy asks, using Megumi’s given name and sounding unsure of himself for what Megumi thinks may be the first time in his life.
And Megumi’s bottom lip trembles. He thinks about all the times he’d wished someone would ask him that question, and he nods. A broken “yes please” falls from his lips, and before he realises it, a strong pair of arms wrap around him, one cupping the back of his head and the other around his waist, holding him close. And he cries quietly, sinking in to the warmth, taking in deep lungfuls of Itadori’s cologne because he can’t remember the last time he was close enough to do that to anyone.
At some point Gojo comes over, complaining loudly about how “Yuuji gets to hug Megumi-chan and he’s not even the one who was gone”, and Yuuji lets go. Megumi doesn’t even have time to miss the warmth when he’s pulled in to the embrace of his sensei, of his father figure, and his sobs just grow louder because he was right, Gojo does give good hugs, and he’s finally on the receiving end of one.
From that day on, Megumi gets hugs. Yuuji hugs him every morning when he walks into the kitchen, hair still messy from sleep. Gojo hugs him after missions and when he goes over to his flat for weekly movie night. Even Kugisaki hugs him when he agrees to go in to Tokyo with her and hold her bags.
He even gets to hug Tsumiki when she wakes up, both teens crying in to each other’s shoulders.
And Megumi realises he doesn’t just like hugs, but he loves them. And he gets them all of the time.