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The sound of footsteps echoing down the hall seemed to grow closer, a fear building from the bottom of the chest up to the throat, a choking feeling grasping a hold of the windpipe. The sounds of footsteps layering and getting added, there had to be at least ten now, on the hunt, using the hunter as the prey where she lurked in her hiding spot. Soon very soon did those footsteps grow as the seconds passed, more and more, a cacophony of sound now echoing causing hands to grasp at where ears would rest under the helmet. Trapped, disoriented, overwhelmed to the point of a headache blossoming. It didn’t help that she was relying on other senses with her vision blackened.
Delving from the layers of discombobulating noise spoke a voice, a voice layered with its own feedback echo, seeming to pry into the space where she was pushed with her back against the wall, “There is no escape.”
A loud blaring noise brought her from the folds of sleep, sitting up fully as a jolt from being startled worked its way through her body with sweat dripping from her forehead. She took labored breaths before reaching over and shutting off the alarm clock next to her. Calming the mind was a difficult task as she stared at the wall in front of her, hands wringing into the sheets as a plea for any sort of grasp on reality.
“Prrrow” Her cat let out as he jumped onto the bed, finding his way into her lap.
“Ziggy.” She spoke his name in a soft whisper, stroking over his back.
She closed her eyes, allowing the gentle weight of the companion in her lap to help bring her back down to reality faster.
“Just a dream… It was just a dream.” she muttered, hands coming to scoop the sphynx from his place as she stood to start her day.
“Just a dream.”
______________
Words couldn’t be bothered to reach her ears as she stood on the Helm, mind distracted as her movements were turned on to autopilot, going about her usual set of tasks when she’d visit the place. Hawk was in front of her, vocal tones carrying but not meeting his mark, he’d soon stepped in front of her as she went towards the vaults.
“Hey… you okay?” He asked, words suddenly flooding through as he put a hand on her shoulder.
The hum of machinery, the movement of the frames, not to mention the shuffle and movements of the cabal in the other room suddenly reached her ears.
“‘Doc… you alright?” Hawk asked again.
“I’m fine.” She lied.
“Really? ‘Cause I asked if you wanted to try makin’ this pepper popper recipe I found and usually you’re excited for culinary wonders.” He’d spoken poignantly.
“I’m… I’m just having an off day.”
“Seems a bit more than that…”
She looked around the room, as though whatever she was about to say was worse than whatever had left her mouth before while on the Helm.
“What? Only one who’s gonna hear is Crow, if he does, and the Traveler knows he’s heard worse.”
“I had a nightmare again.” She admitted sheepishly after a moment’s pause.
“Ain’t nothing to be ashamed of…”
“I know but… it feels silly is all.”
“Hey… I’m your best friend… I’m Hawk man, I ain’t goin’ to judge you.”
Murdoc sighed, shaking her head, “I’m just overwhelmed from it all, it was unexpected.”
“Was it one of the ones where you couldn’t see?” He’d asked softly, knowing her past experiences.
“Yeah…”
__________
Standing beside the bed, staring at it like it was the one conjuring the thoughts in her brain, Murdoc stood almost as if waiting for something. She’d done her nightly routine; no coffee after 7pm, shower and brush teeth at 9pm, PJs on, and light reading till 10pm, yet she still felt unsure. Whatever was happening in the depths of her mind, paranoia didn’t help the subconscious thoughts manifesting.
“Just a dream.” Murdoc told herself, crawling under the covers finally.
She pulled the blanket up close and tight, almost suffocating, arm clutching around the stuffed unicorn plushie laying in her bed. Ziggy had jumped onto the bed, carving out a spot behind her knees, resting comfortably. While her ghost, Gojo, had settled above her head, watching his guardian as she forced herself to slumber.
“Everything is okay… I’m fine.. They’re just dreams.” The Guardian whispered to herself one last time before slowly dozing off.
Not seeing in one of these dreams was bad, adding a layer of terror with the sensory deprivation it had brought, but when all senses were heightened it was worse. After a chase from invisible foes her legs gave out, sending her tumbling down, spiraling down a hill as her hands reached out in an attempt to stop herself. Ground became a cliff before her and she casted her hands out, hands finding gripping along the ledge as momentum sent the rest of her torso and legs over the edge. Slowly the grasp started to fade, fingers one by one losing footing before just one hand remained then none, sending her into the chasm below. A hand, or so she felt, yanked her wrist, suspending her before gravity could plummet her.
Suspended in the face of an unavoidable death, the ground and chasm walls slowly began to be eaten away by black abyss, her settings changing as both wrists were forced above her head and she was left floating in a room of black metallic sheen encapsulating every surface of wall along with floor. She still had her vision, the ability to see the way her legs kicked, how her chest filled and decompressed as the choking feeling worked up from her chest to around her throat. The feeling of her armor and under suit clinging to her became unbearable as she felt every inch with the way it clung to her skin as if it had become a part of her. The grip from the neck liner of her under suit had felt tighter than normal, grasping in a way that felt as though it would lead to suffocation. A metallic taste had grown in her mouth that was all too familiar.
The sound of blood and heartbeat thumped through her ears with a loud ring as its backup noise. She squirmed before thrashing against what restraint was holding her, if this was the end she was going down as a fighter.
A sudden bonk to the head drove her awake along with the distinct voice of her ghost yelling, “Hey! Wake up!”
Her body stiffened with tension as she roused, the glowing light of her life companion staring down at her as she forced herself to slowly sit up, a quick glance to the alarm clock showing ‘3:00 AM’.
“Again? We’ve really got to get a handle on your sleep state.” Her ghost tsked, shell twisting as his words found the air.
She groaned as she pushed herself out of bed, ignoring the way her muscles pulled and yelled as she made her way through her small guardian apartment. Her cat skittered off the bed as her departure disturbed him.
“Thoughts? Opinions?” Gojo asked her.
“I hate this more than you do.” She spoke with a guarantee, flipping on the kitchen light, “I’m my own tormentor.”