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An unholy light entered Phoenix's eyes when Wrex tossed her a set of keys to one of the tomkahs. The krogan let out a soft laugh at Shepard's response to being allowed to drive. Vega looked curiously between his commander and the turian as Garrus covered his face with his palm and let out a small groan the moment the woman had been granted possession of one of the trucks.
"I know it's not the Mako, Shepard, but I figured it's the next best thing," Wrex grinned.
"Damn straight. Just as long as it's not the M-44 Hammerhead, I'm happy," Phoenix replied, bouncing on the balls of her feet like an excited child on their birthday. "I swear that thing is made of tissue paper."
"Wrex, I don't know about you, but I would like to make it to the Shroud in one piece, with as few bumps and bruises as possible," Garrus sighed.
"That's why I'm letting Shepard drive. If I remember correctly, you were with her the last time she visited Tuchanka, and got to listen to our illustrious mechanic bitch and moan about the state of the vehicles when the scouts took them out into the field. He told me, after you left, that he'd never seen someone with such a gentle touch when it came to the tomkahs and that Shepard could borrow one any time she came through."
"Gentle touch? Spirits…" Garrus laughed.
"All right. If you're done complaining, let's haul ass. We've got a Reaper to move and a genophage cure to disperse," Phoenix said, shooing the others into the truck. Hopping inside, she took up her position in the driver's seat, a look of pure bliss crossing her face as the engine roared to life.
"So, what're you guys saying about Lola's driving?" Vega asked.
"Just sit back and enjoy the ride, kid," Wrex answered, settling himself into one of the seats next to Eve. Before he could even move, the truck lurched forward, slamming Vega back against the rear wall of the vehicle.
"Watch it, Vega. I'm not into humans and sure as hell not into men so keep your bulky ass away from my lap," the turian grinned at the solider that had landed within inches of his seat.
"And I'm not into bony bird-like dinosaurs," Vega retorted, grabbing at the handlebar above his head.
"Oh-ho! That one wasn't original as far as insults go," Garrus snickered, watching the human struggle to stay upright while trying to reach the front cabin of the truck.
Noticing a good gap in the road ahead of them, Phoenix angled the truck and, following the lead of the other drivers, floored the gas and launched it off of the makeshift ramp, letting it fly. Unlike the other krogan, her time with the Mako had taught her how to maneuver the vehicle into a less jarring landing than the other tomkahs around her. Her little shout of victory had both Wrex and Eve chuckling behind her.
"I swear, Phoenix, between your driving and head-butting skills, you should have been born a krogan, not some puny human being," the Urdnot clan leader remarked.
"I'm still wondering if that breeding request I got the last time I was here, after helping Grunt with the Rite, was from you," she snickered.
"What is that human expression? Loose lips sink ships? I'm not breathing a word, Shepard."
Phoenix let out an unladylike snort from the driver's seat, her shoulders shaking from silent laughter.
"Ahhh shit," she squeaked, their banter having taken her attention off the road a bit too long. Not having as much space to launch this jump as the previous one, and unable to back up to get her the distance she actually should have had, she pushed the gas pedal as far down as it could go and mentally crossed her fingers that they'd make it to the other side. The landing wasn't as graceful as she would have preferred, either, but at least she'd cleared the gap.
Vega found himself tossed around during the last two hurdles the tomkah had flown over and realized his stomach was either somewhere around his feet or in his throat. Swallowing hard, his grip not nearly as steady on the handlebar as it had been when they first started out, he tried to continue on toward his commander.
"Oh, would you lookit that. Jimmy Vega is turning a bit green," Garrus teased. "I think he's learning about the pitfalls of having Shepard behind the wheel."
"Shut it, Vakarian! My driving isn't that bad!"
"Really? I could have sworn it was you who tumbled us down hills and over cliffs when you weren't backing us up into lava pits."
"Hey now, that last one was an accident! Not my fault that the ground was a bit soft in that area and we kind of fell in. Besides, that was my first time driving the Mako and I wasn't used to the controls yet!"
"Keep telling yourself that, Shepard," the turian chuckled.
"Oh shit!" Vega barked out, finally making it to the front of the truck. "Mother varren! With cubs! Pups! Babies! Whatever in the fuck they're called! Stop! STOP!!
"For fuck's sake, Vega," Phoenix muttered, slamming on the brakes and coming to a stop scant inches away from the varren family.
"I think I'm gonna be sick," James moaned, his body slamming into the passenger side seat up front then promptly losing it all over himself and the floor. "Ahhh damn. I'm sorry."
"Don't worry about it, kid," Wrex laughed. "The first time is always the worst. You'll be fine the next time."
"I don't know if I want there to be a next time," he groaned, slumping back into one of the seats while Phoenix took a few minutes out to help him clean up.
The others exchanged glances and smiles, good-naturedly poking at Vega to help him keep his mind off of the rest of the short trip until he was able to stand on solid ground again.
