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Two hours.
Dallas woke up early the day of Michael and Alex's wedding, excited that he was the one who got to bind them for life. He couldn't think of two better guys for each other, not even Heath and himself.
Heath was his favorite person, and though they didn't always see eye to eye, their relationship blurred the usual platonic boundaries. But they definitely didn't want to marry each other.
His phone dinged; his plus one was ready at the hotel. Dallas smiled. It was always good to see him, and he was glad he could take some time off from med school for it.
His phone dinged again. He had lost at chess. Again. He didn't actually know how to play, but Maria was lonely with her boyfriend off at college and she was insistent, and he usually liked strategy games.
(She talked about Greg a lot, as well as other past boyfriends, and Dallas was fascinated because her relationships sounded like something out of a movie. But not a romance movie. It was like a high school movie, and she was a mean girl. She didn't seem to be aware of this, though, and Dallas didn't know how to tell her.)
(What was especially weird was that sometimes she slipped up and said Alex instead of Greg. Dallas really didn't know what to do then. She didn't notice, either.)
"Loser gives the winner a ride to the wedding this time" was the accompanying text, and he frowned. He supposed if he left now, he could pick her and Heath up, and still have time to help decorate and set up.
He nodded and patted down his pockets, excited all over again to marry his brother and his friend. He had his monologue and copies of each of the boys' vows (just in case their nerves got the best of them). He was ready to go.
One hour.
Dallas rolled to a stop outside of Maria's house where she was waiting. He had to stare as she marched up to his car and pulled on the passenger side handle. It didn't open. She knocked, as if she hadn't seen him. How could he not?
He rolled the window down.
"Come now, I've heard of being struck dumb by looks, but this is ridiculous."
She was wearing a bright red dress and a leopard print coat that he was pretty sure had to be worth more than the car he was driving. "Girl, no. No way are you wearing that as a guest to a wedding, let alone to Michael and Alex's."
She rolled her eyes. "They didn't give us hard and fast rules. It's not like I'm wearing white."
Every time Michael and Alex, Rosa, anyone else mentioned something about her in the past two and a half weeks came flooding back. Holy shit, they weren't kidding. "They specified dark colors on the invitation, Maria."
She indicated her coat.
"No," Dallas said. "No, I'm not taking you to their wedding like that. Jesus, Maria, every photo, video, moment of their happy day is gonna be drawn to you!"
"Look, I'm pretty much Alex's maid of honor which means I get to wear a special color. You know, if he only wasn't gay he'd be marrying me, so..." She waved at the car door.
"No you're not, they told me who was in their wedding parties, and for Alex it was just Kyle and his immediate family," Dallas said, very nearly gobsmacked. "Alex is gay. What the hell are you saying?"
She crossed her arms. "Are you gonna make me stand out here all morning? We'll be late."
"You're not showing up like that. Are you serious? You really hate them that much?" How had he ever even joked about calling her a saint?
That steamed her. "I love Alex more than anyone! And anyway, I don't know why you're being like this when Greg and I just broke up so this is going to be terribly awkward for me. You should be comforting me."
"Their wedding is not about you!" Dallas was upset on Michael and Alex's behalf. "You better suck it up and go change, or stay home. I need to pick up Heath still, so you better decide fast."
"I don't want to see Greg," she said. She took off her coat, revealing more of the ridiculously bright red fabric. "I'd rather see you. You wanna get this dress off for me since you hate it so much? Then we don't have to help set up, either."
"What? No," Dallas said. "I actually do want to help set up, I want to officiate my brother's wedding, and I want to celebrate with them as they take their next steps together as husbands."
"Ugh, wait, don't tell me you're gay too," she said, slinging her coat over her shoulder. "Is Heath your boyfriend? Is that why you've been ignoring me flirting with you?"
Dallas made a face. Was that what she'd been doing? How long? Was that why Rosa had been so annoyed with her last week? "You flirt with me? That's unfortunate because I sincerely had no idea. I'm not gay, but I am queer, so I didn't like any of that tone."
"So now you're calling me homophobic when my best friend is literally gay?"
Dallas got out of his car, finally peeved enough to do something. All he could think was that she couldn't crash the wedding.
"Great, my bedroom is in the back."
"Maria, stop," he said, heading for her truck and popping the hood. He focused on the engine. "I'm not interested in you, I'm not interested in Heath, I'm not interested in anyone. What I am interested in is the boys having an excellent wedding after all that they've been through, and it sure seems like you're trying to mess with it by bringing drama." Smoke billowed.
"What the fuck!" she shouted. "Are you for real right now? That's my truck!"
"You are trying to wear bright-ass red to my brother's wedding!" Dallas got back in his car and raised the window enough that she wouldn't be able to reach her arm in, because at this point, he didn't even trust her not to do that. "You know what, just don't show up. They don't need your drama. If you come in that outfit I will physically remove you."
"Dallas, you just killed my truck!"
"Yeah, I did. I'll pay to have it fixed. Too bad the best mechanics in town are busy since one of them is getting married and the other is his father. Change and call a rideshare if you really want to go support them. Think about why you feel the need to make their wedding all about you while you wait. And then don't."
"I'm not--"
Dallas rolled up the window and backed out. God, that was upsetting, and he didn't want to show up to the wedding upset. He took some deep breaths. He was calmer by the time he got to the hotel, but still pissed off, and truly, truly incredulous at the assumptions she made about Alex, and about him.
Heath was ready and waiting, and Dallas unlocked the door for him as soon as he saw him. "Hey, man," Heath said as he opened the door.
"Hey! Sorry about the wait. There was drama."
He scrambled in and quickly put his seatbelt on. "Drama? Oh no."
"First of all," Dallas said, reaching over to grind his knuckles into Heath's skull. "How do you always manage to look so scruffy, dude?"
"It's my brand!" Heath swatted him away. "What happened? It's not gonna be awkward for me to be there, right?"
"Of course not, I got the okay from the grooms. They said it's fine as long as you don't put anyone in a coma."
"Ahahaha... yeah, I'll do my best to not do that. If it's not me, then what happened?"
"My chess buddy asked me to pick her up..." Dallas described his morning, and the simple act of telling his best friend helped calm him down a lot. Maybe too much, because now he worried, "Did I overreact?"
"Uh, no," Heath assured him. "I keep telling you, by the way, you gotta be more up front about the no interest thing! Maybe you should tell people we're boyfriends if it'll stop them from propositioning you. First Jenna, now Maria..."
"I did tell Jenna I wasn't interested! After she told me what she wanted. At least she was up front about it, you know I have no idea unless they tell me outright. It feels kinda presumptive? Besides, you would think being a priest in a celibate denomination would be enough, so I don't think 'having a boyfriend' would stop anyone, either," Dallas said. "But I meant, did I overreact to what Maria was trying to wear to the wedding?"
"No, man, the instructions were very clear on the invitation you sent me a picture of. Semi-formal, dark colors. If it was me I'd kick her out."
"Okay. Yeah," he said, nodding. "Yeah. I should talk to... Isobel, I think, I don't want to bother the grooms with this stuff."
"You were upset enough for them," Heath said. "Better they miss her than for her to ruin their day."
"Yeah." He sighed. "You're right."
"Just repeating what you said, buddy."
"I'm really glad you're here, even if it's just to echo me."
"Shut up." Heath smiled. "Me too."
Dallas parked down the street from the gazebo. Much of the wedding party had already arrived, eager to support the grooms and help set up seating and decorations. Isobel, especially, was directing their friends and family with a sharp eye as she placed name cards on the chairs.
With his arm linked to Heath's, Dallas made a beeline for her. "There's a problem," he said.
She spun and frowned deeply. "No! No there isn't, Michael and Alex are getting married today and there won't be any problems. Don't say that. What is it?"
"There's a potential problem," Dallas corrected. "Maria asked me to pick her up, but given what she was wearing, I made the executive decision to leave her there."
Isobel blinked at him. "Are you kidding? Would you show me?"
He nodded, and she dropped them into her mindscape, where he brought up that morning's memory. Isobel turned as red as the dress. They left it with her hissing, "I asked her if she had an appropriate dress, that I would buy her something if not, and she said she had just the thing!"
"I could see her having too much pride to accept that," Dallas said.
"Fuck that!" Isobel snapped, as quietly as she could so as not to make a scene. "It's their day! She can swallow her pride and follow directions! Everyone else understood the assignment! Oooh if I see her in that dress I am gonna fight her."
"Well, she might not even show up," Dallas said, nodding at the gazebo proper, where Alex's brothers were setting up pale yellow and white flower arrangements. "Apparently she and Greg broke up so this is going to be 'terribly awkward' for her."
She crossed her arms and yelled, "Gregory Manes!"
He jogged over. "What's up, Legend? Hey Preacher."
"Hey."
"When did you and Maria break up?" Isobel demanded.
Greg's brow furrowed, and he looked down sadly. "Umm, we didn't, as far as I know? She said she'd come later, she didn't want to be outside for too long and ruin her makeup."
Isobel's eyes widened, and she and Dallas exchanged a look.
"I'm gonna tell him," Heath said.
"Don't you dare," Isobel said as Dallas pulled on his arm.
"What?" Greg said. "Did something happen?"
"She's just trying to make Michael and Alex's wedding about her," Dallas said, feeling bad for him. Maria considered them broken up, and she hadn't even told him.
"Oh. Yeah," Greg said, rubbing his neck. "She... does that." He sighed. "Honestly, I'm not surprised if she said something about us breaking up. The long distance thing hasn't been working, but when she told me she was coming to see me a couple weeks ago, I thought it'd be different. It wasn't, and she was so irritable the whole time, so I was going to suggest a break... Then she told me about Mimi. She must be having a difficult time, but she doesn't want comfort from me, so I've been letting her have her space."
Isobel patted his arm sympathetically. "You're a good guy, Gregory Manes."
"Thank you." He nodded. "Hopefully, she'll remember that today is for Alex and Michael. See you later." He went back to his family to help hang a garland of sunflowers.
"Oh my god," Heath said quietly. "She was going to break up with him here. In front of his whole family, at his brother's wedding. Is that some kind of space grudge?"
"Don't put that on us. The rest of us would never do that." Isobel whipped out her phone, tapped a contact and spoke cheerfully. "Kyle? Hey, how's Alex doing? That's lovely." She dropped her sweet voice. "Can you bring tranqs?"
"We-We can't tranquilize her," Dallas said. "Can we?"
"Oh, we can and we will if she thinks she's going to cause problems at my brother's wedding," Isobel said grimly. "It's my duty as Michael's best woman to make sure there aren't any problems. I will commit murder to make sure his wedding day is perfect."
"Uh, hold on," Dallas said.
Isobel smiled. "Don't worry. It won't come to that." Her face twitched. "Unless it does."
"I'm scared," Heath mentioned.
Dallas patted his arm, and Isobel turned her focus back to her phone and succinctly explained the situation. She added, "No, they don't need to know, we are the bullshit shield. They should focus on the joy. Everything is pretty much set up here, so I'm going to go pick up Mr. Sanders and make sure Michael hasn't gone full feral on Max. Dallas is going to hold down the fort. We're running on time. Yes. Alright, see you here." Isobel put her phone away.
"I'm going to hold it down?"
Isobel put her hands on Dallas's shoulders. "You're a capable guy. Drown her if she shows up in that monstrosity."
"I will not let her stay," Dallas said. "I don't think I'm down for murder."
Isobel hissed, then took a deep breath. "No, you're right. Murdering her would leave a stain, and we can't have that. If she shows up in accordance with the dress code, fine, but she may not speak to Greg or start any other drama."
He nodded. "Got it. Can I do anything to help in the meantime?"
"Uhh, I think we're good," Isobel said, looking around. She saw the Ortechos (plus Bonnie) setting up some snacks and waved. "Ask them, and have an empanada. I'm gonna go wrangle Michael. He keeps threatening to elope."
"Good luck," Dallas said.
"Thank you, but I won't need it. I have years of experience wrangling nervous grooms." She tossed her ponytail over her shoulder and headed to her car.
"Your sister is amazing," Heath said.
"She's dating the guy you drugged into a coma," Dallas said.
"Oh, god, she's gonna kill me."
"Come on," Dallas said humorously, dragging him over to the food tables. "You heard her, murder would taint the day."
"Good morning!" Arturo said.
Rosa jumped on Dallas, and Liz hugged Heath. Bonnie waved enthusiastically.
"You all look stunning," Dallas said.
Arturo winked. "Thank you, you boys do as well. Want an empanada?"
"Yes please," Dallas said, and Heath accepted one gratefully too. "Mm, so good."
Arturo leaned forward and said, "The statue of Jesse Manes has been removed without a word, but no one else has noticed. The thing's been up for a year, and I've had to look at it every day. But when I got here this morning, it was gone..." Arturo grinned. "No love lost, I think."
Liz and Rosa hid their laughs under their hands, so Dallas and Heath nodded conspiratorially. Bonnie had no idea what he was referring to but happily munched on her own empanada.
They chatted for a few minutes until one of the Manes boys came over. This was the one helping with Clyde, Dallas was sure. "Hey, Preacher," he said. "Flint Manes. Do you need anything set up on the altar?"
"Please, Dallas is fine. They didn't want a podium, they thought that would be too distancing. Michael's my brother, nice to really meet you," he added.
Flint nodded in understanding. "You too. Alright. Then everything's ready to go! Hey Mom, have you had any of Mr. Ortecho's empanadas?"
The rest of the family joined them, and again they chatted and snacked.
Twenty minutes before noon, Liz tapped on Dallas's shoulder. She jerked her head, so Dallas patted Heath's back and followed her.
"Do you know what's going on with your chess buddy? I just told her she was going to be late and she said she wasn't coming because of something you said."
He couldn't help the breath of relief. "Liz, she was going to wear a bright red dress. All I told her was not to come unless she changed."
"Red is my color," Liz said.
Dallas looked pointedly at her black and white patterned dress.
"Exactly! It's my color and I'm not wearing it because they asked us to wear dark colors." Liz crossed her arms. "I mean, it's a wedding, I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to wear bright colors anyway. I'd have done burgundy, maybe, but this one matches Max better."
"Yeah, it's the respectful thing to do," Dallas said. He waved at all the flowers. "Isobel made the suggestion of highlighting the colorful flowers by having everyone in dark colors, and Michael and Alex really liked that. But in my experience, it's rude as hell to wear bright colors or white to a wedding."
"Even Mother of the Groom Mindy stuck to deep mulberry," Liz said, nodding at Alex's mother, who also had on a dark coat to further dampen the color. "Everyone else is in some shade of charcoal or gray. Maria would definitely stick out like a sore thumb in red. But why didn't she just ask to borrow something from me? I-I could bring her something now!"
Dallas caught her arm before she could head to her car. "Sorry, didn't mean to grab you. It's just, she's a powder keg right now, it's probably best she doesn't come at all. She also wants to break up with Greg, and she said if Alex wasn't gay he'd be marrying her, not Michael."
Liz blinked rapidly. "She told you that?"
"This morning, when I said I wouldn't take her to the wedding in a bright red dress."
Liz mumbled rapidly in Spanish and took out her phone. "What the hell do I even say about that?" She put her phone back away. "That's insane. Okay."
"Take a deep breath."
She did. Twice. "No, this isn't helping. Excuse me." She held onto his shoulder to lean over and take her heels off. "I'm gonna, uh, run upstairs real quick and hit something."
He gave her a thumbs up, and she took off at a sprint toward the Crashdown.
"What was that about?" Rosa asked, catching him just before he rejoined Heath.
"Maria's not coming."
Rosa rolled her eyes. "Of course not. Either she's the center of attention or she gets talked about in absentia. Nah. Not today. We are going to ignore her, alright?"
Dallas nodded. "Alright. Today's about Michael and Alex, after all."
"Hell yeah, it is," she said, grinning. "Can I ask you something real quick, though?"
"Yeah?"
She nodded at Heath. "You called him your brother before, and he bros you sometimes too, but... is it more of, like, a queerplatonic thing? You don't have to answer, I'm just asking 'cause y'all remind me of a QPR in my building."
Dallas opened his mouth, then shut it thoughtfully. "Maybe so. That sounds right, I'll have to talk to him about it. But it's definitely not something exclusive, if you're interested in him."
Rosa made the most disgusted face that had Dallas laughing.
Liz returned, shoes back on, and they all helped to cover the empanadas.
Moments later, multiple cars that Dallas recognized pulled up. He got on the top step of the gazebo and yelled, "The grooms are arriving, everyone please take your seats!" which were carefully assigned by Isobel for minimum drama.
Dallas waved at Heath, who had struck up a conversation with Jenna, then headed for the party getting out of Michael's truck.
At the same time, Alex's family crowded his car on the other side, and they would each make their way to the altar amongst their closest friends and family. The best man and best woman would remain on the altar/gazebo, as would Dallas to officiate.
The ceremony was sure to be beautiful. Dallas was excited for them all over again, any potential problems flung far from his mind. This was Michael and Alex's day, and from the smiles already on their faces, it was going to be supremely joyful.