Work Text:
Ever since Jeremy clumsily waltzed back into his life, Michael’s found himself swarmed with feelings that manifested years ago.
His days are now filled with warm fragments of memories, and mental images of freckles dusted across Jeremy’s nose and round, red cheeks, the dark curls falling into his face. Each conversation and long stare into familiar brown eyes adds to the feeling there’s a ticking time bomb set to go off, and all Michael can do is ignore the never-ending feeling of dread—like something bad will happen again. Familiarity haunts him in the worst way. He grabs onto Jeremy’s presence so he can’t lose it.
It’s a matter of poor timing. He wants the one person he can’t have, just as Jeremy is no longer just his. The one boy he’s ever desired is preoccupied with someone perfect, for whom he’s totally whipped.
And all the time, he hears about how perfect things are. How so in love Jeremy is with someone who doesn’t know him the way Michael does, each quietly exchanged secret and late-night conversation; years of friendship could never be rivaled by someone who’s been in their circle for not even close to a year.
That’s how it’s supposed to be, right? Friends before partners. But Michael knows Jeremy will always choose them over him now, just because they didn’t talk for a few months, and because Jeremy’s so head over heels, it hurts him. And even then, Michael still waits. It’s so disgusting. It aches like nothing else in the world.
But he wants the one he can’t have. And it’s Michael’s fault for not loving Jeremy sooner.
The whole situation has taught him how to be more grateful for what he has. Never again does he want Jeremy ripped from the clutch of his hands, to leave Michael behind all on his own accord.
He loves Jeremy too much to watch him leave again. And he knows Jeremy isn’t a mind reader, but he pleads anyway, in case maybe one day he is. Please love me back.