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I miss my lover, man. My heart was bleeding from the inside out. I couldn’t do this anymore. After reggie I now also lost em. Why? Why did I have to loose everyone I ever loved? A tear fell down my cheek. I heard a knock. An owl was knocking on the window. I opened the window while holding back tears. On the owls leg there was a letter. I took it and read it.
Darling panda,
Ive heard about Emmeline. I am so sorry. I can’t imagine how you must feel. I am so so sorry. And all of that so short after Regulus. If you want we can organize the funeral… and you can always come here. Really always! We are here for you.
Love, Lily.
These words were the last straw. My legs gave in under me and I fell to the floor. Ugly cries escaped me and tears flooded over my face. I couldn’t stop sobbing. She was my love. She was the women I wanted to marry. I had planed to propose tomorrow, and now she was gone. My beautiful Em, the light of my life was gone. The only person I’ve ever loved that way was gone.
I saw my wand and made decision. „Im sorry!“, I whispered as I grabbed my wand and put it to my forehead…
I couldn’t do it… I couldn’t delete her out of my memories. I couldn’t delete myself. So I did the second best thing. I took all my courage and… snapped my wand.
„Im sorry…“, I whispered again. Still crying I stood up and grabbed a few things. Then I left that house on the cliff.
A few months later
„Pandora?“, i heard someone say. I turned around and…. „Go away please“, I said coldly. Lily was standing in front of me. „Please pandora. Talk to me!“, she pleaded. „There is nothing to talk about! I left that world behind for good!“, I declared. „I left all of that behind… I left all of you behind! And I wanted it that way!“ I clenched my fists and reminded myself to stay calm. „Please Pandora. We all miss you!“; Lily said. „No! Leave me alone!“ With this I turned around and walked away. I just got myself a live in the muggle world and now she had do destroy everything. „Do you think Emmeline would have wanted this?“, Lily shouted. „Do not tell me what Em would have wanted! I know that! Its your fault she’s dead. Yours and the fault of this damned order of the phoenix!“, I screamed. „Now leave. Me. Alone!“ Angrily I stomped in the direction my apartment. My nails were digging in my palm and I felt warm blood run over my hands. „Im sorry, Em!“, I muttered to myself. And that was it… I never got visited again…