Chapter Text
Mika spun away from Shu, coattails swishing against his legs as he concentrated on matching his movements precisely to Shu’s hands. Up, left, right. This dance was familiar and comforting to Mika, a way for him to fall into the soothing embrace of being a doll once again, and he wished they performed it more often. He spun back in towards Shu, feeling his partner’s fingertips skim across his shoulder as he raised his arms-
The stage plunged into darkness.
Mika felt Shu freeze in place behind him, his breath stopping. Memories were flooding back, of another time this had happened - and spelled the end of Valkyrie.
No! How can this be happening again?
Panicking, Mika twisted around to look at Shu in what little light came in from the tiny windows near the ceiling. The crowd was murmuring with confusion. Mika touched Shu’s arm, whispering his name, but he stood stock-still. Mika inhaled. He’d just have to finish the performance for them again.
The power suddenly came back, temporarily blinding Mika as the stage flooded with light once more. As the dots cleared from his vision, he could see the audience looking back at them expectantly, but still, Shu didn’t move. Of course. He must be trapped in the past. Mika swallowed the spiky lump in his throat, forcing his nerves to calm. It would be impossible to finish singing the song in a satisfactory way on his own. He’d have to improvise something. Valkyrie was known for their non-traditional style, so he could do anything. Get it over with, he told himself sternly, and seized Shu’s arms and lifted them to his sides, shocked at how easily Shu allowed it.
“An- an’ suddenly, the puppet stirred to life, an’ the puppet’s master collapsed to the ground, just as lifeless as the dolls he had painted, waitin’ now for someone to-“ Mika glanced at Shu, and, seeing how pale his face was, made a split second alteration in the already impromptu script. “-save him. The once-cold puppet took pity on its beloved master, and bore him away to safety.” And with that, he quickly ushered Shu off stage, pushing him from behind. As they disappeared into the wings, he could hear confused applause.
One of the concert hall’s staff members rushed over to them. “We are so sorry!” she exclaimed. “The power went out momentarily. Thankfully it came back pretty quickly, but we know it affected your performance.”
“It’s okay,” Mika responded. “I know ya wouldn’t do anythin’ like that on purpose.” He could see her looking at Shu, who was leaning heavily against Mika with his eyes closed, with a curious expression, and continued quickly. “Oshi-san’s jus’ tired after all that, so we’re gonna hurry on home now, okay?”
The journey home was, thankfully, a short one, and the entire way, Mika held tightly to Shu’s hand, talking brightly and pointing out the things he saw - a coffee shop with the smell of freshly baked pastries and ground beans wafting out, a cute, fluffy dog with a curly tail, brilliant sapphire blue flowers in bloom by the sidewalk. When they arrived at the dorms, he took Shu to his room.
Ritsu was laying on his stomach in bed, arms wrapped around a fluffy pillow beneath his chin. “Hey, Mikarin. What’s up with Itsuki-san? He looks a little sick.”
“Ah, hey, Ritsu-kun…yeah, Oshi-san’s not feelin’ too great. Is it okay if he stays on the couch in here for a lil’ bit?”
“Yeah, yeah. Lemme give ya guys some space, though.” Ritsu slid out of bed with a yawn, dragging his pillow after him. “See ya later.”
As the door closed behind him, Mika guided Shu over to sit on the couch, then gave him an appraising look. The entire way back, he’d only murmured a few times in response to Mika’s words. “How are you feelin’?”
Shu’s eyes were trained on the floor, and he spoke quietly, Mika straining to hear. “I’m…tired.”
Mika tried not to celebrate too much, but this was already a lot better than things had been last time. “You just rest here for as long as ya want, okay? Do ya want some water, or somethin’ to eat?”
“Some water…would be nice.”
Mika nodded vigorously. “Water, okay! I’m on it. Lemme go get Mado-nee, too. I’ll be right back. Um, don’t go anywhere, okay?” he added as he went to the door, recalling the past. Shu nodded, and Mika let out a relieved breath.
After their sabotaged match with fine, Shu had been impossible to speak to. Mika had done his best to take charge in a way he never had before, sitting him down outside while he went to go fetch him some water, just as he was doing now. But that time, in the instant Mika was gone, Shu had wandered away. Mika remembered how he’d almost fainted when he returned to find the bench empty. He’d spent the rest of that day frantically searching, until Subaru, of all people, brought him back.
And so, wanting to avoid a repeat of the past, Mika sprinted upstairs to Shu’s dorm room. Mao opened the door for him. “Kagehira! What brings you up here?”
“Um, Ikkun, sorry, I’d stay an’ chat with ya, but I need to fetch Mado-nee.” Mika sidled past Mao with more apologies, picking Mademoiselle up in his arms, before leaving just as quickly. Mao watched him leave with a bewildered expression. After that, it was down to the kitchen, where Mika grabbed a bottle of water, before rushing back to his room. Quickly, quickly.
Thankfully, this time, Shu was still there, frowning down at his hands, resting in his lap with the palms upturned. “Oshi-san! ‘M back. Here, here’s some water.” He held the bottle out to Shu, who accepted it, turning it over in his hands. “An’ here’s Mado-nee. I’ll put her right beside ya, okay?” He nestled Mademoiselle between Shu and the arm of the couch, then sat down on Shu’s other side, pressing against him, and watching for his reaction. Shu’s expression didn’t change, but he did take a long sip of water, before setting the bottle down on the floor.
“Thank you,” he whispered. Mika once again nodded, reaching for Shu’s hand, then hesitated.
“Um, is it okay if I hold your hand?” Shu nodded slightly, and so Mika took Shu’s hand in his, entwining their fingers together tightly.
It hadn’t been like this last time. Before, Shu had practically turned into a doll himself, unmoving and unspeaking. He’d locked himself in his room for days, huddled under his blanket, only able to ask himself why. His family was at a complete loss as to how to take care of him, and so chose to ignore the issue, but Mika was there every day, coaxing Shu into eating, drinking, taking care of himself. They’d both missed so much school back then, but Mika didn’t care; nothing was more important to him than to make sure he didn’t lose Shu, who was teetering on a knife’s edge, forever.
But it had still been so hard. Whenever Mika would peek into Shu’s room to see him sitting on the floor under the blanket, clutching Mademoiselle to his chest and illuminated only by the thin light of the moon, he’d wonder to himself if he’d ever get his beloved Oshi-san back. He would sometimes catch sight of Nazuna in the distance at school and feel an explosion of anger in his chest, only to be replaced by an icy sadness in the next instant. Why wasn’t he here to help them, when he’d been a victim too? It wasn’t fair.
Still, bit by bit, Shu had begun to crawl out of his darkness, chasing after Mika’s guiding light. He’d say good morning to Mika when he brought him breakfast, ask what his plans for the day were. He finally started going back to class, back to sewing in the handicrafts clubroom. And even though he was never exactly the same as he was, Mika knew that now, he was better.
He squeezed Shu’s hand. “Oshi-san, even if ya need more time, like you did before...I’ll be right here beside ya, jus’ like then.”
“Kagehira…thank you.” Shu’s voice was surprisingly clear, if hushed. “I will be better soon. I am sorry to cause you so much trouble.” He shook his head. “Ah, you must think me so weak, for a mere technical failure to bring me so low.”
A wide smile lit up Mika’s face, glad to hear him speaking once more. “It’s no trouble for me. I mean, ya went through a lot before, an’ that was real scary earlier to have happen again. I think anyone would be shaken up over that.”
“Mmm…for now, can you move over? I want to lay down here, but I want to talk to you too.”
Mika nodded, releasing Shu’s hand and sliding over to the other side of the couch. Shu started to lay down, holding Mademoiselle in his arms, and to Mika’s surprise, he settled his head right in Mika’s lap, before closing his eyes.
“That’s better.” He exhaled softly. “Can you talk to me about something else? I don’t…want to think about the past.”
Mika nodded again, a tiny smile on his face. “Well, yanno, or actually maybe ya didn’t since you were still in Paris, but me an’ Naru-chan went to the amusement park the other day. They’ve got a new ride, an’ also a whole buncha new games. Actually, I kinda was wishin’ you were there with us, ‘cause you’re so much better at the crane games than I am.” Mika let out an embarrassed laugh. “Naru-chan won a few times, though. She gave me one of ‘em. It looks like a seal, an’ it’s got real big eyes…” Without thinking, his hand went to Shu’s hair, running through it, and then, suddenly realizing what he was doing, he yelped. “Ah! S-sorry, Oshi-san, I didn’t mean to do that.”
“It was nice, though.”
“Really?”
“Yes…” Shu breathed out slowly. Uncertainly, Mika returned his hand to Shu’s hair, and Shu smiled. Heartened, Mika continued to talk, stroking the soft, rosy strands. “Anyways, after that, we went to go get some lunch. That bakery you like, they’ve started sellin’ chocolate croissants. They’re really good, we should go try them sometime before you have to go back to France.”
As he spoke, Mika eventually became aware of an alteration in Shu’s breathing. He’s asleep, he realized, looking down in shock. Shu’s arms were still wrapped loosely around Mademoiselle, but he looked peaceful and calm, and Mika smiled as he brushed Shu’s hair aside.
Hey, Oshi-san…you can always rely on me, you know?