Work Text:
Touta was no idiot.
Sure, he wasn’t as hardened or as cynical as his coworkers when it came to investigations and upholding the system to keep up the status quo, but he was still a grown adult who had been exposed to the horrors of criminality. If there was one thing that he learned over the years, it was that it was easy to pretend that he wasn’t as affected by the degeneracy that accompanied the tragedies of police work. That smile on his face? That was him trying to feel something that wasn’t existential dread. He wanted to show others that he was still human underneath the suit and the badge.
It was with that philosophy, to embrace these sides of life, both the gritty and the vibrant, with particular emphasis on the vibrant, that Touta tried to live life. It bled into his workplace relationships, his acquaintances that he managed to hold onto, and to his special romance that he had with you.
You were so beautiful, a light in the dark that was rapidly descending on the world. Ever since he had first seen you, helping him up when he had tripped over his shoes while carrying a tray filled with coffee, that he realized that even when Kira was at large and he was treated like a nuisance at work, he was still deserving of the love and affection usually afforded to couples.
Ever since that day, Touta made sure to always be on coffee duty. If L or the other investigators were caught off guard by the fact that Touta was adamant that he was the one to leave the building just to get L’s favorite coffee, they didn’t show it. However, the elder Yagami had taken Touta aside, a worried, but stern look in his eyes.
“Don’t get distracted while we’re all working on this investigation, Matsuda. I know that this situation is stressful and we all need time to destress, but if you can’t put all of your focus on catching Kira…”
Touta knew that his superior had already harbored doubts about him, but it rankled him. Didn’t his coworkers trust him to know what he was doing? It wasn’t as if he was slacking off. Wasn’t retrieving coffee for the world’s greatest detective one of his main strengths? The rest of the team hadn’t blinked the second L relegated Touta to being an errand runner, but when he was actually compliant, they began to ask questions?
It was annoying.
However, Touta was kind and patient. Despite what reservations he had, he wanted to make sure that he was still on the good side of his coworkers.
“Of course, chief!” He rubbed the back of his head with a bashful look on his face. He didn’t need to pretend to look foolish—he had years to practice that expression. “Don’t worry about me, just focus on catching Kira.”
And while everyone else was intent on capturing Kira, Touta was focused on you.
To be clear, he didn’t slack off when it came to analyses of reports or following leads. However, he could not deny that he spent his days thinking about you, wanting to be near you. Over the next few weeks after that initial encounter, he had brushed past you at least a dozen times, caught your name, and eventually looked into your social media accounts.
You were beautiful.
You were kind.
But it wasn’t just the social media aspects that gripped him. Rather, it was the fact that in real life, you smiled at him. You thought him to be responsible and important.
Hadn’t you told him a few days ago that he was punctual and you could count on him to be there at the precise time every day? Touta thought that he could combust. Finally, someone out there who could appreciate him without picking him apart through criticism.
To Touta, it was a refreshing change of pace.
However, passing by you every day, exchanging a few words here and there weren’t enough. Touta could glean bits and pieces of your personality from what you posted online, but he wanted to know the true you.
What you curated on your social media was only the tip of the iceberg.
Therefore, in order to really know you, he needed to be a part of your life.
Thanks to your previous comments and small interactions, it should not have been a hard task for him to get you to fully trust him. After all, he was a man of the law and a fool in love.
What harm could he ever do to you?
It went like this:
The way he drops one of the styrofoam cups of coffee is believable. Ordinary. You would have laughed if someone told you that Touta had timed it just so, had splashed enough coffee on himself to appear frazzled and dazed instead of pathetic. When you helped him to his feet and helped dry himself with serviettes and tissues, you would have thought him charming and sweet.
Touta is not an idiot.
He knows that he’s acting in his own self interest, possibly compromising the state of the Kira investigation.
He knows that what he’s doing is not normal.
But most of all, he knows that you’ll fall for him like this because if you knew how practiced his clumsiness and stupidity were… you would have never looked at him with the kindness that he alone deserved.