Work Text:
Despite having your own Master you still found yourself spending most of your time in the company of Master Obi-Wan Kenobi and his Padawan Anakin Skywalker. More often than not you accompanied Anakin to his lessons with Obi-Wan, whether it be lightsaber training or mediation.
The training a Padawan undertook was long and gruelling, days seemed to drag as you were taught the ways of the Jedi. Your Master was a cold man, he lacked the patience needed to train a Padawan which led to him snapping at you whenever you were made to train with him. Obi-Wan, however, was everything a Jedi Master should be, where you struggled to mediate, to shut your mind off to any and every outside distraction, your Master would snap and push you without proper guidance, Obi-Wan was the exact opposite. You still remembered the first time you’d mediated in front of him, how much you had struggled to do what came easily to most Jedi and you fully expected Obi-Wan to lose his temper with you, only to be shocked when he sat down in front of you and spoke, his words soft and gentle as he guided you and for the first time ever you felt yourself fall into that peaceful state easily.
From there you had been eager to learn under Obi-Wan’s guidance. Compared to Anakin you felt your training was far behind despite the fact the two of you had started training at the same age though you hadn’t met until a few years later when your Master’s had been sent on a mission together with the instruction to bring their Padawan’s along.
It was from that mission on you had become a permanent attachment to their duo, spending time with them even if it did take you a while to open up to them. The kindness they both showed you was such a stark contrast to how your Master treated you that you couldn’t help but stick with them.
Keep reading
Obi-Wan had wondered whether he should put a stop to how involved in their lives you were becoming. When you started joining Anakin’s lessons he had debated over what to do but Anakin seemed to like the challenge of a new opponent, one whose moves he couldn’t predict as well as he could his Master’s so Obi-Wan let you stay until he became as attached to you as he was his own Padawan. Watching as you grew in your training, how you seemed to thrive under his gentle guidance and encouraging words and sought out his advice on how you could improve made his heart warm and he knew that he wasn’t going to put a stop to you joining them.
Throughout the years Obi-Wan had tried to talk to you about your Master, about why you seemed behind in your training and more inclined to let Obi-Wan teach you. Each time you gave a vague answer, one that never answered his question before quickly changing the subject or darting off somewhere before he had the chance to ask you more questions.
Anakin had also asked you about your Master, never having heard much about him. Anakin could never imagine training under another Master when he had Obi-Wan and knew that something wasn’t right between you and yours but as you did with Obi-Wan you did with Anakin and did your best to avoid answering the question.
As the years went by and you got older your Master’s outbursts seemed to become more frequent and less justified. Some days he would yell at you when you weren’t training, when the Council sent you on missions together. You and your Master had never particularly gotten along well but the last couple of years had been worse than when you were a child.
You ignored it though, content to find comfort from Anakin and Obi-Wan, content to hide away with them when things became too much. You knew both men knew something was wrong but you had refused to talk about it and over time they didn’t ask as much as they used to, knowing full well you weren’t ready to talk about it yet.
One morning you found yourself in a training room, Obi-Wan walked around you and Anakin as you both duelled against the other. Years ago it was a challenge, neither one of you could predict the other's next move, the next step but now after years spent at each other’s side, being taught by the same Master it was easy to see four moves ahead.
That didn’t mean the two of you went easy on each other, if anything it meant the two of you were more cocky, riskier in the moves you made and by the time the doors to the training room opened the two of you had worked up at sweat, panting as you grinned at each other as Anakin managed to get you on the ground with his lightsaber pointed at you.
“Alright, that's quite enough you two.” Obi-Wan told you with a smile.
Anakin holstered the lightsaber and reached a hand down for you, your grin still firmly in place as you slipped your hand into his and let him pull you up.
“Don’t worry, Y/N/N, one of these days you’ll beat me.” Anakin told you, his entire face lit up as he threw an arm around your shoulder and pulled you into him.
“Please,” you scoffed, letting yourself enjoy the closeness before playfully pushing him away, “I was just going easy on you.”
“Padawan,” A cold voice from the doorway said, causing you to flinch slightly, an action that didn’t go unnoticed by Obi-Wan or Anakin. “We are being sent to aid the clones.”
You had to force your feet to move, to follow your Master out of the room, forced yourself to ignore the worry you felt coming from the two Jedi left behind in the training room. The air was tense as you followed him into the craft and even more so once you were up in the air and he turned his cold gaze towards you.
“Spending time with Kenobi and the Skywalker child again, Padawan?” He snarled and you barely suppressed a shiver.
This was the cause of many arguments and despite how much you dreaded your Master’s temper you would take any anger he directed your way so long as you could seek comfort from Obi-Wan and Anakin. You knew it wasn’t the fact you were so close to the two that angered your Master, though it certainly didn’t help matters, but it was an easy thing for him to target, an excuse for him to actually be angry at you.
You had no idea what you had done to cause so much hatred from your Master, since you were a child he had never had a nice word to say towards you. You remembered being so young, so upset that he seemed to hate you and tried so hard, did everything right, to get him to like you.
Nowadays you had accepted your Master’s anger, accepted you would never find the reason for it and stopped trying to please him, stopped seeking out his approval. You suspected Obi-Wan had a large part to play in your acceptance, the man was the complete opposite of your Master and where your Master shot you harsh words and hateful glares, Obi-Wan easily countered it with kind touches and soft words.
And then there was Anakin.
Anakin wasn’t foolish, he could see that you and your Master didn’t get on and though he had questioned but never pushed the matter, he had become an expert in reading you. He always seemed to know exactly when you needed him, was always there with a shoulder to cry on and distractions that often pulled the two of you into some kind of mischief that Obi-Wan never scolded you too much for because he too could see when things had gotten bad.
You loved being a Jedi, loved helping people and saving them but some days you wondered what would have become of you had you not met Obi-Wan and Anakin. Would you have stayed with the Jedi or would you have left the Order many moons ago? You believed you would have left, if you hadn’t had Obi-Wan and Anakin’s kindness to counteract your Master’s harshness. You truly didn’t think you could survive the years spent as a Padawan, not without the Dark Side spreading through you until you were consumed by it .
“Stupid girl wasting your time with those two, though I suppose I cannot expect much better from someone so foolish.” Your Master spoke, pulling you away from your thoughts and bringing your attention back to him.
You barely suppressed a sigh but knew if you let it escape you’d be done for. The words you could take but if he ever saw signs of you fighting back against him, even something as little as a sigh or squaring your shoulders back, you knew that the consequences would be bad.
It was a lesson you had learnt the hard way and your side still burned from where the Force lightning had been directed.
Instead you sat there, still as a statue and watched as one of the clones announced your Master was needed elsewhere. Once he had left the room you let yourself relax and looked towards the clone, Daar, and shot him a grateful look, smiling as he nodded back at you.
You were close to many of the troopers and knew that they saw how your Master treated you, he didn’t hide it around them, not when he could order them to stay silent and they couldn’t disobey him. A few had offered to though, they had come directly to you and told you they would gladly disobey orders if you asked them to. You had smiled at that but each time had told them to do as your Master said, no point the clones being punished when you could take what your Master gave.
The rest of the trip was blessedly silent, the clones coming up with a reason to keep your Master in another section of the craft and it wasn’t long before you were landing.
The entire mission was a mess, that was the only word for it. Your orders were to protect both the people and the Senator but your Master seemed to only hear the last part of those orders as he laid out his plan that willingly sacrificed the people of the planet to get the Senator away safely.
The people were starving, held captive by the droid army and from your position you could see many slaughtered innocents. You grimanced before turning back to your Master as he spoke, your eyes wide as you listened to him, he was not a kind man but this was extreme even for him. How he was a member of the Jedi order, a Jedi Master, was completely beyond you.
“We can’t let him do this.” You told Daar as your Master left the craft, lightsaber already out as he and some clones fought droids in order to make it to the palace.
“What do you suggest we do instead?” Daar asked and all the remaining clones turned towards you, each of them waiting for orders from somebody who did not have the authority to give them but all of them willing to follow them no matter what.
You stood silently for a moment, shocked at how the troopers didn’t hesitate to turn to you, to let you give the orders but then a smile broke out on your face and you nodded. Nothing good would come from this for you, you would be punished both by the Council and privately by your Master but you refused to just let the people of this city die for no reason, not when you could save them.
“Out here we only have the droid army in our way, let Master deal with whatever member of the Empire is holding the Senator captive. You think we can get the people out?” You asked Daar and he shot you a grin as he nodded.
“Course we can, right boys?” He asked and the troopers gave a cheer causing your smile to widen.
From outside the craft you could see your Master had made progress with the droid blocking the entrance to the palace, his gaze turning back towards you and calling for more clones.
With a final glance at all the troopers, your gaze landed on Daar who gave you a softer smile and nodded causing you to nod back. The troopers put their helmets on and you all left the craft, you spared a final glance back as you all made your way in the opposite direction to see your Master’s furious glare towards you.
The droids seemed to multiply, for everyone you took down five more appeared. The troopers were fairing no better and there were a number of casualties but eventually you fought your way to where the citizens were being held. It took some effort to free them as droids fought back and you had to deal with your Master yelling every hateful word and threat he could think of through the comms but eventually the droids were down and stopped coming and you ushered the people towards your ships.
Your Master and the Senator, as well as the people who had been trapped in the palace with him, all stood around the crafts and you ignored your Master as you passed him, thankful when Daar put himself between the two of you so he couldn’t grab you and began handing out the food rations you had brought with you.
You tried to drag it out for as long as possible but eventually you had to leave. Boarding the ship, your heart was in your throat and anxiety pulsed through your veins, you waited for your Master to dole out whatever punishment he saw fit but it never came and that only made you more scared.
Daar noticed your anxiety and sat down next to you ignoring the glare your Master sent towards the two of you and patted you knee gently.
“You did go out there today.” He told you, the words quiet but the genuineness of them was clear and you couldn’t help the smile that pulled at your lips.
“Thank you,” you said, keeping your voice just as quiet, “I’m just glad we were able to save everybody.”
The trip back to Coruscant didn’t take too long, something you both hated and were grateful for. You weren’t foolish enough to believe you could slip away before your Master got a hold of you, knew what was to come but still once the ship landed you tried to leave as quickly as possible.
“Not so fast, Padawan.” Your Master snarled, his hand reaching over to wrap around your bicep, grip so tightly you winced and knew bruises would form but they would be the least of your worries after he was done with you.
You could see the troopers behind him, could see Daar take a step forward but you shook your head as discreetly as you could, watching him step back reluctantly.
“Come with me.” The tone of the man’s voice was low and harsh as he dragged you away from onlookers.
It wouldn’t be long until you were called before the Jedi Council, your Master had already given the briefing through holocomm, but it was enough time for him to pull you into his quarters, far away from any witnesses and leave you crying out, withering on the floor as you felt the lightning produced by the Force spreading and burning your body, sweat pouring from you as you tried to fight against it but it was useless as you were pinned down by the Force.
Your Master gave you enough time to go to your chambers to clean up, tears and sobs leaving you as you tried to pull burnt fabric from the burns and covered it in as much bacta salve as you could.
You cupped water into your hands before splashing it across your face, desperate to hide evidence of what had happened. Despite it though you didn’t regret your actions, so many people were alive because of you and you would gladly go through that a thousand times if it meant they were safe.
Your Master showed up at your door and grabbed your arm again, dragging you down to where the Council members were gathered. He stopped abruptly outside the door and pressed his hand into where he had burned causing you to wince and bite back a sob.
“If you know what’s good for you you’ll keep your mouth shut.” He warned before standing up tall, a friendly look spreading across his face as he entered the room and greeted the members of the Council, you following behind and keeping your gaze down.
As you stood there you had to fight down protests, felt the anger rise in you as your Master painted a picture completely different to what had happened. As he told them his plan was to save the Senator before helping the citizens but you had jeopardised the entire mission as well as the lives of all the innocent people and the Senator’s to prove yourself.
The pain in your side made it unbearable to stand but the hatred you felt in your veins, a deep anger you had never felt before made it hard to keep your mouth shut. How dare he, how dare he say you needed to prove yourself! It had never been about that, you only wanted to help people, you didn’t care if the Jedi Council took notice of your actions so long as the people who needed your aid were safe.
Once he was finished you finally looked up and came face to face with a sea of disappointed looks. The only person who didn’t look disappointed was Obi-Wan, instead he had a small furrow in between his brows as he looked between Master and Padawan, seeing something the others weren’t.
“A common occurrence, this is becoming.” Master Yoda said and your jaw clenched under the effort to stay silent. Of course the Council member’s thought you disobeying orders was a regular thing because no matter what you did your Master always, always, found a way to make it seem so.
You managed to keep quiet, staring straight ahead, knowing that any attempt to counter your Master’s story would only end badly for you. The burning pains in your sides only reminded you of that, reminded you of what your Master was capable of.
“To add, have you anything?” Master Yoda asked you and it took every ounce of strength you had to not fall to your knees before the Council and beg with them to help you, to protest your Master’s fabrications, to show them what he did to you but you knew it would amount to nothing, your Master had taught you that long ago that Master’s could give out whatever punishment they saw fit.
As you shook your head you felt your anger spike again, though it seemed impossible that it could do so. From your side you could practically feel your Master’s smugness coming from him in waves.
The room stayed silent for a moment and you took the opportunity to look at Obi-Wan, his eyes already looking back at you. You watched as the man’s face softened though you could practically see how fast his thoughts were running as he knew something was wrong.
Obi-Wan had known for a long time something was not right. For years you had been by his side, he had watched you grow from a small, shy little thing into the young woman you were now. He had trained you, had brought you onto his missions with Anakin and watched you thrive under his guidance. He rarely got the chance to see you with your Master but the times he did, especially now, the person you were around him was not the person Obi-Wan knew.
“Archive security, you shall do.” Master Yoda announced and Obi-Wan barely suppressed a sigh at Yoda’s choice of punishment, you weren’t going to like this at all.
“Archive security?” You repeated, the words coming out of your mouth without your permission. Your tone was complete disbelief as you stared at the Council member’s, watching as Obi-Wan rubbed at his forehead.
“A problem, you have with this?” Master Yoda asked and yes, yes you did have a problem with this because even though it got you out of missions with your Master it also meant it got you out of missions with Obi-Wan and Anakin and left you behind, alone with your Master.
You were desperate for that not to happen, you couldn’t cope with being around your Master anymore than you had to be. You knew it was a bad idea to argue with the Council, to do something else to anger your Master but still your mouth opened, words ready to fall when Obi-Wan cut you off, probably saving you from a worse punishment.
“Y/N.” He warned, his tone soft and gentle as you turned to look at him.
Obi-Wan shook his head and you silently pleaded with him but knew that even he couldn’t do anything to get you out of this. He had no proof beyond his own doubts and unfortunately that wasn’t solid evidence.
Oh stars, he thought to himself as he looked at your wide eyes, why won’t she just tell me what’s happening so I can help?
“No problem, Master Yoda, forgive my outburst.” You apologised robotically, hands clenched at your sides as you listened to Master Yoda dismiss you.
You bowed towards them, side burning at the movement and you barely choked back a sob at the pain but made your way out of the room.
You stood outside the Council doors, cursing the face that you were forced to remain here, alone without the two people you cared most for, the two people who made your Master’s actions easier to deal with. You longed to tell them about the burns covering your body but Master’s could do as they saw fit to punish their Padawan and you knew they would only turn you away.
“Y/N,” Obi-Wan called softly as he slipped from the room.
Your head shot up to look at the man and you couldn’t help but let your thoughts run. Obi-Wan wouldn’t turn you away, right? In all the time you’d known him you had never seen him harm Anakin, no matter how badly his Padawan messed up. Perhaps if you told him, maybe he wouldn’t disagree with your Master’s way of dealing with you but maybe would help you patch yourself up.
Obi-Wan gave you a kind smile as he gestured for you to walk with him, each step sending a new wave of pain through your body.
“What really happened out there?” He asked softly as the two of you walked side by side.
You stayed silent for the longest time, thoughts running wild as you debated whether to tell Obi-Wan what was happening. You trusted Obi-Wan more than anybody, knew his kindness better than most and by the time the two of you arrived at his quarters you still hadn’t made a decision.
Obi-Wan let you remain silent, he could see the thoughts in your head, could see the frown on your face as you battled over what you could tell him. He could see the exhaustion coming from you, could see your anger and how you were ready to let it out. He hoped he could help, hoped you would finally tell him what happened behind closed doors.
The man let you through the doors first before following after you and gesturing you over to the sofa, raising his eyebrow as you grimanced whilst sitting.
“I wish you had been my Master.” You finally spoke after a long period of silence, the words so quiet Obi-Wan would have missed them if he wasn’t sitting so close to you.
“As do I, young one.” He told you, taking your hand in yours and giving it a gentle, encouraging squeeze.
At his words, your eyes filled with tears, the exhaustion and pain and anger you felt all became too much suddenly as the tears fell down your cheeks one after the other, your breaths coming out as shaky sobs.
Obi-Wan’s own eyes widened at the sudden onset of tears but he didn’t hesitate to comfort you. He pulled you softly against his chest and you willingly went, hand gripping his cloak as he held the back of your head, running his fingers soothingly through your hair.
The tears refused to slow and you stayed buried against Obi-Wan’s chest for a long time, the man's arms around you, holding you in place as he murmured gentle words of comfort, not rushing you to calm down but allowing you to work through it.
He could tell you had been holding onto these emotions for a long time, the tears coming from you ached his heart and he wanted nothing more than to wrap you up and keep you far away from your Master who was no doubt the cause of all of this.
He didn’t let his own anger show, didn’t want you to think he was upset with you at all. It was rare for Obi-Wan to feel such anger, he liked to think by now he had a pretty good grip on his emotions but listening to you, your tears soaking his robes as you sobbed into his chest, he couldn’t feel much but anger.
At some point the tears subsided into sniffles, your eyes red and blood stained after crying for so long. Obi-Wan felt your breathing even out and thought you had fallen asleep, especially as you cuddled further into his chest but then you began speaking.
“I only wanted to save them.” You told Obi-Wan, your voice croaky from sobbing uncontrollably but also emotionless, “He was going to let them all die and I wanted to save them.”
“I believe you.” Obi-Wan told you and the honesty in his voice had you letting out a shaky breath.
“He punishes me,” You said, eyes falling closed as you forced yourself to keep talking, “it doesn’t matter what I do, he always finds a reason to punish me. Some days he doesn’t even need a reason.”
Obi-Wan’s own eyes fell closed as he dreaded your next words but asked anyway.
“How does he punish you, young one?”
You were silent again and Obi-Wan, despite not wanting to hear the answer, needed to. He needed to know so he knew exactly how bad things had got, so he knew just how to help you.
“He uses the Force, uses lightning.” You said, the words bringing on a fresh set of tears but you kept them trapped behind your eyelids, pushing your face further into Obi-Wan’s chest.
Obi-Wan felt his heart stop at your answer, his blood running cold as mental images filled his head of you being burned with Force lightning. How had he never noticed? His grip tightened on you, his arms holding you closer but at your wince he pulled away like he himself had been burned.
“Y/N,” He said, the word so soft as he looked at you. You didn’t let him say anything else, you’d come this far you might as well go further and with that you pulled your cloak away and lifted your shirt enough for Obi-Wan to see the fresh burns as well as the old ones.
Obi-Wan gasped, his hand moving to touch the fresh one before pausing. There was fabric that seemed to have melted into your skin and he winced as he continued to stare. He had seen a lot of injuries in his lifetime but that had to be up there with some of the worst.
“Y/N,” He breathed out, his gaze shifting from your burns to your face, silent tears making their way down as you let your shirt cover them again.
Obi-Wan reached over to wipe at your cheeks, moving towards you and placing his lips to your forehead, letting them linger there before he pulled away.
“We have to inform the Council.” He told you softly and you looked at him, shaking your head but he cut you off before you could speak. “Y/N, he cannot be allowed to stay, what he has done to you is-” Obi-Wan cut himself off, not having the words to describe the pain inflicted onto you.
“Master’s can punish Padawan’s however they want.” You told them, the words were void of emotion and almost robotic, like you were repeating words you’d been told for years and Obi-Wan didn’t doubt that.
“No they cannot.” He told you, voice firm and you looked at him with wide eyes. “How many times has Anakin messed up since being my Padawan? I’ve lost count and I have never inflicted pain upon him. He gets a scolding and if the Council sees a harsher punishment is needed they will see to it but never would it be something that would harm the Padawan.”
The words made your eyes water even more as you felt foolish, of course you should have known that.
“Don’t be so harsh on yourself, he made you believe something for a very long time. He manipulated you into keeping this pain a secret. You are not to blame, I promise you the Council will see that too.” Obi-Wan told you and you nodded, tears sliding down your face again and you wrapped your arms around him and cuddled into his chest again.
Obi-Wan held you close whilst making sure he wasn’t hurting you and swore he would see to it that your Master was dealt with.
Anakin walked into his Master’s chambers after roaming the Temple looking for you after hearing about what had happened on your latest mission and stopped just inside the doorway as he took in the scene of you sobbing into Obi-Wan’s chest.
You hadn’t heard Anakin enter the room but Obi-Wan did and he glanced up at Anakin with a sad smile as he held you. He was glad Anakin was here, he wanted to keep you out of this meeting though he knew the Council would want to speak to you, he wondered if perhaps any of the clones had seen anything and would be willing to speak up about it.
He gestured for Anakin to come closer and you jumped when you felt Anakin sit beside you, relaxing when you saw it was him.
“I know archive security is boring but that’s a lot of tears.” Anakin said softly and you couldn’t stop the choked laugh that escaped you causing the two men to smile.
“I have to speak with the Council,” Obi-Wan told the two of you and you turned to look at him with fear shining in your eyes. From behind you he could see Anakin’s questioning look but just shook his head. “If you want to be there whilst I tell them you can be but it’s completely your decision.”
“I’ll stay with Anakin.” You told him softly, sniffing as you rubbed at your eyes. “You can tell him.” You allowed, gesturing to Anakin as you leaned back into Obi-Wan, even more exhausted than you had been before.
You listened as Obi-Wan filled Anakin in on what he had missed, listening with a small smile as Anakin fumed on your behalf, threatening to go and deal with your Master himself but Obi-Wan assured him it would be dealt with and that his only job was to look after you whilst he spoke to the Council.
That seemed to calm Anakin down and he nodded, sitting back down next to you and letting Obi-Wan transfer you from his arms to Anakin’s, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead before he stood and readjusted his cloak.
“You know where I’ll be if you need me.” Obi-Wan said before he turned to leave the room.
Anakin looked down at you as you lay on his chest and smiled softly. He wished Obi-Wan would allow him to deal with your Master but knew you needed him more.
“Come on.” Anakin said, nudging you up softly being mindful of the injuries Obi-Wan had told him about. He knew sitting on the sofa wouldn’t help your wounds and instead stood, smiling at the soft whine of protest that came from you before you took his offered hand and let him lead you over to the bed.
You had to admit it felt much better to be laying down and as Anakin pulled you back into his arms you couldn’t help but relax, feeling better than you had in a long while. It seemed bizarre that Obi-Wan was going to talk to the Council about this, that it wasn’t normal and the Council were going to have something to say about it.
It almost felt like a dream, like you’d wake up with your Master standing over you with a smirk on his face.
“I’m so sorry, Y/N.” Anakin whispered as he pressed a kiss to your hair and you smiled, hand holding the fabric of his shirt and cuddling further into him.
“You didn’t know.” You whispered back, eyes heavy as they fell closed and you couldn’t find the strength to open them again.
“Nobody will ever hurt you again, I promise.” You were certain that was a promise Anakin couldn’t keep, no matter how hard he tried but you appreciated it all the same.
Cuddled up in Anakin’s arms, in Obi-Wan’s moments before, felt safe. It was as safe as you had felt for a long time and knowing that the two of them cared so much about you, that they were willing to speak up for you and, in Anakin’s face, threaten the man who had caused you so much harm, had you believing that things would be ok. Once your Master was gone and you had only the two of them you truly believed that, in time, you would be ok.