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Warning: This has major end game spoilers for A Plague Tale: Requiem. I would recommend playing the game through entirely before reading this.
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters, places, etc. from A Plague Tale. It all belongs to its respectful owner.
Silence
The tall trees surrounding her as well as the familiar scents of the woods brought her mind back to a simpler time. Back when she hunted with her father, Lion by her side, although the trees had been bathed in the autumn colors then. She hadn’t had a care in the world back then, and for a moment she was almost able to trick herself into believing that everything that had happened was merely a dream.
“Are you ok?” Lucas’ voice snapped her out of the daydreaming she had been doing, and her gaze moved slowly towards where he was standing, just a short distance away from her, his gaze cautious, worried as always. It took her brain a moment to remember where she was exactly, and she slowly nodded.
“I… think?” The statement came out more as a question, as she herself couldn’t determine if she was ‘alright’, but it caused the younger boy to shift slightly, his gaze casting about nervously. It had been the young alchemist’s idea that getting Amicia out of the wooden cabin and walking around would be good for her health. She hadn’t missed the whispered conversations that Lucas and Sophia had, always casting worried glances in her direction. Worried that she wasn’t eating enough, wasn’t getting enough sleep, wasn’t really interacting with anyone beyond what she had to, and sometimes ignoring them completely.
“Sorry… wrong question… I- ah…” Lucas trailed off, glancing back towards where the cabin was still in sight, as the two hadn’t gotten that far from the structure yet. “Would it be better if we went back? You can always try again tomorrow.”
Amicia glanced back towards the cabin as well, the one that the four of them would have come to had things gone differently, and she shook her head. Heading back there didn’t seem like the right idea either to her. Too many memories and familiar scents, despite the time that the cabin had remained empty. She had only visited the area a few times when she was younger with her parents and her memories of the place were vague, back before Hugo had been born and the Prima Macula had manifested. The mere thought of her parents and Hugo caused the girl to take a sharp intake of breath, feelings threatening to take hold of her once more.
“It’s going to be ok. Just breathe Amicia…” She hadn’t realized that Lucas had gotten so close, the boy now holding onto her arm as if to keep her upright. She must had nearly blacked out once more, another reason that they had hesitated in allowing her to go anywhere in her current state, let alone without one of the two of them with her. Once he was sure that she was steady, or rather steady enough to keep upright, she heard him sigh. “Let’s go back for today, alright?”
He had phrased it as a question, but she could tell by the gentle nudge on her arm that he was going to take her back. She shook her head, pulling slightly away while focusing on keeping her ground.
“No… I’m ok. I can keep going.” She didn’t want to admit to her friend that going back to the cabin was just as painful as being in the forest. She didn’t want to go back and have her friends look at her, sorrow and worry in their gazes as they tried to help her through what had happened over the course of the last few days. She didn’t want to fall asleep to fitful dreams that quickly turned into nightmares, that left her screaming and sobbing as she woke, only for Lucas to come try to calm her down when the reality of the current situation set back in.
“Ok…” His gaze rested on her worriedly, and he cast another glance back at the cabin before back at her, as if pondering whether going back and getting Sophia would be the right course of action. Although the other woman was still healing from her wounds, she had stuck around and was helping out as best as she could. “Just let me know if you need to take a break, ok?”
Amicia nodded, fixing her gaze back on the rugged trail ahead of her, wondering where the path led to. She had missed quite a bit of the journey here. Her mind had been foggy, skipping in and out of wakefulness as she tried to cope with what she had had to do, with how her life would be from now on.
“It’s a fairly straight walk-.” Lucas pointed towards the path that led deeper into the woods. “If you don’t count the roots and fallen branches in the way.”
She could tell that he was trying to act similar to how things had been before, as if logic would help her forget and maybe help her feel slightly better with a goal in mind. She nodded, and set off at a slow pace, marveling at the trees and rocks surrounding the trail. True enough, like the alchemist had said, there were some roots that jutted out of the ground and branches in their way, although it was a rather paltry challenge to go around or step over them, compared to what the two had been through. As if anything could compare to what they had been through.
She could feel Lucas’ gaze on her back as he followed her, most likely gauging her reaction to things. He didn’t say anything, waiting for her to talk if she so desired. The sound of the gentle rushing of water gave her a pause, causing her to stop momentarily and see where it was coming from. A small trickle of water against rocks led farther up the hill and she followed it, a bit faster this time till there was a small break in the trees and she could see a river. Memories flooded through her at the sight and she leaned down to touch the water, feeling the gentle current pass through her fingertips.
“Oh! A river! It’s the sea!” Hugo had been so excited to see the river after their time traveling, rushing towards it while Amicia followed him, a smile on her face as she watched his childish innocence. The boy had been convinced that this place was their castle during their game of pretend and his sister was more than happy to play along.
“This is where my Kingdom stops.” Her brother had declared, walking over to a sizable branch near the waters surface. Amicia moved towards him, trying to keep laughter out of her voice.
“That branch is your frontier?”
“Yes!” At that declaration, she couldn’t stop a small laugh from coming out.
“Alright why not.”
What had ensued next had been Amicia and Hugo protecting the king’s domain from fierce invaders attempting to land on the shore. While it had been nothing more than pinecones that were envisioned as enemy ships, Amicia played along and sank them gladly, for each time she did her brother got so excited, laughing gleefully as she struck invader after invader down.
“Want to stop for a bit?” At Lucas’ voice she was brought back to the present, and she shook her head, standing up as she watched a pinecone float down the river that they were currently at. Her chest hurt as she watched it float by and she shifted.
“After…” She began, pausing momentarily to collect her thoughts as she glanced over at Lucas. “That day we had been playing hide-and-seek. After you had gone back to study. Hugo and I…” Her throat felt parched just saying her brother’s name, but a gentle hand on her shoulder from the young alchemist gave her the strength to continue. “We found a river just like this one. He was convinced that it was the edge of his kingdom and we had to protect it from invaders. So, we played pretend, with my sling shooting down the pinecones as he threw them into the water.”
A gentle squeeze on her shoulder caused her to look back over at Lucas, where pain was hidden in his gaze as well.
“Sorry I missed that. Sounds like you two had a lot of fun.”
“Yeah. We did.”
She expected Hugo to chime in with some long-winded explanation of why exactly they were defending the kingdom and from who but when she didn’t hear anything she shifted, breaking her gaze from Lucas’, and moved back towards the trail. She tried her best to ignore the sound of water now, focusing back on the path in front of them. More trees greeted her vision, but the path had started to have a more upward slant now. She set off once more, trusting that Lucas would follow, even though she didn’t know quite where exactly she was heading. Maybe if she just kept going, she would find…. something that would put her mind at ease.
Just something… anything…
As the two continued to climb, with Amicia reaching the top of the small hill first, she stopped to allow her friend to catch up as she reached the stone ledge that led deeper into the forest. After allowing Lucas to catch his breath, she stepped aside to allow him to go first, watching as he climbed the ledge with ease. The girl stared up at the stone ledge, before bending down, her hands grabbing at empty air. She froze, remembering that Hugo wasn’t there for her to help up the slope this time, and didn’t know quite how to react, so she continued to stand there.
“Amicia, you have to help him next time.” Their mother’s voice echoed through the small enclosure as the girl landed back on the ground in a crouch. The rain continued to fall, and she glanced back to where Hugo was trying his best to climb through the window.
“Ah right, sorry.”
A hand reaching down towards her caused her to jolt back slightly, and she glanced up to where Lucas was reaching out towards her.
“I know you don’t really need the help but…” There was a light blush on his face as he looked away and she gratefully took his hand, allowing him to help pull her up. It was something not as familiar to her as lifting Hugo up and she was grateful for the distraction.
“Thanks.” The thirteen-year-old muttered a quick ‘welcome’, his gaze still partially directed at something else before he coughed slightly and glanced around where they were currently standing, releasing her hand in the process. The area had widened out a bit, leading off in two paths now.
“So… which way?” Lucas asked the question and glanced towards her, causing her to inspect the two paths.
One seemed like the same scenery that they had seen so far, while the other led slightly upwards still, where she could just vaguely see a fallen tree leaning against something. She pointed out of habit towards the area, and without waiting for a response set off once more. The hike to where the tree had been leaning was brief, but she could now see that it was leaning up against a stone ledge that had a crawl space underneath. She glanced back at Lucas, who had just made it beside her and was catching his breath, before she flattened herself against the ground. There was light coming from the other side of the crawl space, which looked like it led to more trees. She hadn’t seen a way to crawl over the stone ledge so under it was.
A quick crawl later and she stood up now, brushing some of the damp ground off her tunic as she waited for Lucas to crawl through. The boy did the same, although giving her a slightly quizzical look at her persistence to get through the obstacle.
“You sure you don’t want to head back for today?” She shook her head, although that was most likely his gentle way of reminder her not to push herself and that dinner would most likely be ready soon. While she couldn’t smell anything from the cabin from this distance away, she was sure she had heard Lucas and Sophia talking about some kind of stew.
“No. I… want to keep going.” Amicia herself wasn’t sure why exactly she wanted to continue but something had to be at the end of this path. Why else would it be hidden the way it was, even if just by nature and not some man-made structure.
Lucas merely shook his head and gave her a small smile, gesturing towards the rest of the path forward.
“Let’s just make sure we don’t stay out too late or… we won’t be able to find our way back.” Amicia was sure that that wasn’t what the boy had meant to say but nodded regardless. Neither of them were used to the notion that the rats seemed to be gone, disappearing after their time in the Nebula, but she knew that their group was still wary of the fact that nighttime in the past had been what had drawn the creatures out most frequently.
Just a short distance away was another smaller ledge this time that they quickly climbed, which led to a taller one. Amicia was the one who tried to go up first this time, nearly slipping at the strange way of not being the last to go up the structure, before she made her way up and leaned down to help Lucas. He didn’t hesitate to grab her hand and she pulled him up as well, both taking a moment to glance where the path led, closer to the edge this time. The breathtaking view of the mountains could be seen as they got closer to the edge, making sure not to get too close, with Lucas studying both the edge and her warily before they began to climb once more.
“We’ll have to bring Sophia back later. She’ll be sorry she missed this…” Amicia let out a small laugh at the statement.
“I’m pretty sure she would prefer a view of the sea than the mountains.”
“True…”
The small conversation almost seemed normal and for a moment neither of them quite knew what to say as they continued up the slope, which led to another stone ledge that they two quickly climbed. The higher they got the more they could see and Amicia glanced down, trying to see if the cabin was in sight. She wasn’t disappointed despite not being able to see it though, and glanced forward once more, seeing a thin ledge jutting out from the cliff. She glanced back at Lucas, then towards the ledge, before starting to make her way towards it.
“Ah… Amicia…” Lucas’ wary tone caused her to glance back at him looking warily at the thin outcropping. “Maybe we shouldn’t? I mean…”
“Don’t worry. I won’t fall.” She glanced downwards as well at the drop before carefully flattening herself against the wall. “And you won’t either.” She added next, watching as the Alchemist took a breath, muttered something under his breath, and came to stand next to her. She could feel his gaze on her as she shimmied her way across towards the other side but could hear him following after her at a much slower pace, clearly being more careful of his actions than she had. She couldn’t hear what exactly he continued muttering and she tried not to let out a laugh as she reached her hand out towards him once she made it to the other side. They both took a moment to regain their breaths, with him looking back at the way they came and then back towards her.
“Please tell me there’s another way that doesn’t involve perching ourselves over a cliff?” Despite the question, she knew that he knew she didn’t know the answer either, causing her to lightly shrug, which caused a light groan to come from the boy.
“Come on. I think we’re almost there.”
She patted Lucas encouragingly on his shoulder and pointed towards where there was another small ledge they would have to climb and then something beyond it. The boy shook his head before standing upright and following her over past the ledge. There was a hole just big enough for them to squeeze between, with Amicia going first. Once she arrived on the other side however, she paused, her breath caught in her throat. This area was much wider than the last, with three large stone pillars standing in the middle of the alcove a short jog away. She didn’t wait for Lucas and instead started to jog faster towards them, not quite sure herself why she was so… excited, nervous, to get to them.
Amicia stopped slightly away from the middle of the three pillars, staring at the scattered rocks around the area. She half expected her brother to come charging from behind her, making some excited exclamation about the tall stone pillars but she was once again met with silence, which only tugged at her chest painfully once more.
She stared at where a large stone slab was already placed and then back around at the scattered rocks, her heart twisting painfully. She took a deep breath, trying to mentally steady herself before walking over towards one of the bigger rock slabs and picking it up.
I never got to bury Father and Mother… and even though there isn’t a body… Her breath caught in her throat at the thought, but she tried to push it aside. Tried to bury the grief so it didn’t overwhelm her, as she set down the rock she had picked up on the large slab that was already in place. She heard footsteps come up behind her, but she ignored them, knowing that Lucas had caught up with her.
“Hey…” The soft whisper came from the Alchemist, with a bit of confusion in the word as well. “Amicia, what are you doing?”
She chose to ignore him, because if she gave voice to the thoughts swirling in her head, tried to explain what it was that she was doing, she wasn’t sure she would be able to continue. Picking up another rock, and another, and another, moving each one so they were precariously stacked one on top of the other. She tried not to think as memories were drug up as she placed each stone, her breath becoming ragged.
“Hugo… it’s me, Amicia, your - your sister.” She peered cautiously down at her brother in his fort, uncertainty in her gaze as to why exactly their mother had told her to stay with the boy.
“Amicia…”
“Many tried to invade us.”
“But we pushed them back!”
“Because we are the house of De Rune!” The game of pretend continued on, each pinecone ship sinking bringing bright laughter from her brother.
“Amicia.”
“Please… I need to see you…” She was tired of fighting, tired of all the pain that she brought and was inflicted upon them.
“I’m proud of you.” Her brother’s voice reverberated around her, causing her to glance up frantically around her. She didn’t see the boy, something that was torture to her. Her breaths came in ragged gasps.
“Where – where are you?” He finally appeared a short distance away from her, walking slowly towards her.
“Hugo! Come, come!” She outstretched her arms towards her brother, needing to embrace him, to see that he was safe.
“Amicia!” She was briefly aware of someone shaking her but she pushed them off, continuing to stack rock after rock.
“We have one chance… the last one…”
“Tell me. I’ll do anything.” She would always do anything for her brother.
“I think you know already…”
“I-.” Amicia hesitated, it couldn’t be the answer. It just couldn’t. He couldn’t possibly mean…
“You must stop me. To stop the Macula.”
“Hugo… you can’t ask me that…”
“Stop! Just… please stop Amicia…” The begging brought her back to her senses, causing her eyesight to focus. Lucas was standing in front of her, grasping her wrists firmly but gently, his eyes full of worry and sadness.
“Lucas…” She dropped the rock in her hand, this one much smaller than an apple, before sinking gently to her knees, trying to hold back sobs. Amicia glanced just barely past the Alchemist at the small burial mound that she had built before her eyesight clouded up. “I can’t do this…” She felt his arms wrap hesitantly around her, pulling her in for a comforting hug.
“You don’t have to…” His voice was barely more than a whisper and she latched onto it, trying not to get pulled back into the spiral of passing memories. “Not now… just… give yourself time to heal…”
She latched onto his words. Heal? Could she ever? Could she ever remove the pain of all that she had done?
“I can’t… I can’t live without him Lucas…” The admission caused her more grief. How was she ever supposed to move past this? What was the point of living if she was all alone without her brother? The last of the De Rune’s… “I killed him Lucas… I killed so many people… and for what? I couldn’t save him… there was no miracle cure! The worst of it is that I’d kill all over again if I could bring him back…”
“Don’t, just don’t Amicia. You can… you’re stronger than this…” The Alchemist took a breath, his voice shaky as well. “Hugo… he… he knew you were.”
It was at this moment, when she glanced back up at her friend, she felt wetness on her sleeves. He was crying as well, most likely trying not to drown in his grief like she was. The Alchemist had admitted that they were family to him, so it was quite possible that his grief was just as great as hers. He had lost his mentor - Amicia and Hugo’s mother - and had to stand by, just as helpless as she had been, as she had to put down her brother. This wasn’t any easier on him than it was on her.
“I’m sorry…” Her voice broke and she kept repeating the word because what else was there to be done? They both had suffered more than anyone should have, and she had been so focused on her grief that she hadn’t thought to help him through his.
The two sat there for hours to come, processing their feelings and trying to figure out what would come next, before eventually making their way back towards the cabin. Left behind on the burial mound, a necklace with the De Rune emblem lay buried under one final rock, with a simple flower laying in front of the marker.
Hi everyone!
So now that that’s out of my chest and I can freely sob again (because honestly who wouldn’t and the amount of time I spent mulling over how to word this all caused a lot of feelings) thank you for reading! For those of you wondering, I do have some more lighthearted stories that I will post as I write them but for now we get to process some of the grief that the characters themselves were feeling in a scene we didn’t really get to see. I always debated if they had retrieved Hugo’s body at the end of Chapter 16 but never really got a concrete answer so for this one I chose to write as if they hadn’t (this will probably vary based on what story I am writing. Thanks again for sticking with me till the end of this one! Hope you all enjoyed!
-EmiriSuika