Chapter Text
James almost resented Thomas for getting a penthouse, as he glared down at the offensive slip of paper that dictated who'd he'd be sharing a room with for the next 9 months. It's not like he couldn't afford one himself, his father wouldn't think twice about lending him the money for the first few months or so. Yet, with his track record of sickness and chronic illness, his mother suggested he save that cash for his next medical bill.
James of course had nodded, packing away his things for the next years of college and resigning himself to a roommate. At the time, he really didn't think it'd be so bad.
"Dorms will be good for you, Jemmy," his mom had told him, southern drawl twinging her words like warm honey. "You have got to make some more friends,"
"I got plenty of friends, ma," he huffed, but solemnly accepted that he was now stuck.
If Thomas had sucked it up and dormed out, they may have been able to be roommates. Sharing a room with his fellow Virginian would've made things so much simpler. Who'd think twice seeing them together? They could finally share a bed without fear and paranoia biting at their ankles.
Now, though, he didn't know what to make of this. Aaron Burr, printed in sans script, stared at him. James struggled to drag up any memory of the man, coming up with only bad information. Burr was a quiet man, all small smiles and pleasantries whenever he happened to be drawn into any given conversation. He was a simple, unproblematic person, which should have been perfect for him. Yet, the young student took unproblematic to a new record.
James couldn't name anyone he might've called Burr's friends, with a very slight expectation to maybe Hamilton. He never faltered, never lashed out, never spoke up; a perfect, empty person with endless dark eyes that gave nothing away. James knew nothing of him. Not one belief, core value, moral, nothing. More than that, his mantra of 'talk less, smile more' and unwillingness to form any close relationships led to the fact he didn't mind playing dirty. He'd throw anyone under the bus if it meant he benefited from it.
There was nothing telling him if Burr stood on the side of gay rights or not, and his family name of pastures didn't help much. His throat felt tight, hands trembling weakly as doubt clouded his mind. 9 months of rooming with Aaron burr, and James didn't know if he could handle it.
But it was day one of college, and all of his belongings were set up inside this far too small dorm. The other side remained clean and empty, patiently, waiting for the other occupant to arrive. Swallowing down his irritation, James kicked the last of his shoes under his bed
James sat down on his bed, hands already reaching for his phone. Thomas would know just what to say, know just how to make his worries dissipate. He pressed his phone to his ear, biting the inside of his cheek as ringing echoed back at him -once- twice, before it picked up.
"Jemmy!" Came that familiar voice, sending shivers down his spine. The grin spread across his face was natural, tension in his shoulders melting away. " Fancy getting a call from you. How can I be of service to ya,"
"Finished unpacking, just thought I'd check in." he hums, fingers rapping lightly against his bed.
"Ah, how's the dorm life?"
"Boring, Thomas, He's not here yet,"
"Know who it is?"
"Burr," Nimble fingers rub circles into his temple, headache already forming. He prepares himself for whatever long-winded character analysis Thomas had on burr.
"Oh jemmy, you be careful of that man, he can not be trusted. He's opinionless, and sways with whatever will garner him sympathy or victory. He thinks just because he's a prodigy and trust fund baby, he's above everyone. Burr can smile more all he wants, but I know a snake when I see one," His voice carried an air of distance, words dripping with hate usually reserved for Adams or Hamilton. "Don't trust him,"
"Thanks Tom," He drawled, rolling his eyes. "Way to make me super excited to room with him,"
"You're smart, Jem, I know you'll see through whatever ish he tries to pull." Just like that, warmth and gentle smugness pollutes his voice once more. It's stupid, really, but he can't help but grin wildly with affection for the man on the line.
"Of course, Thomas."
"I… I love you, okay?" It's spoken like a secret, even though he lived alone now. His face is so warm, cheeks stinging from how much he was smiling. The soft, quiet tone crackling through his phone speaker made it feel so intimate. 3 months was too long without his boyfriend, and his skin craves the contact of the taller male.
"Love you too, dork," The call ends, and for a moment he forgot why he felt so shitty to begin with. That's until the door opened, and a short, dark male entered the room carrying a suitcase and bag. Wide, almost black eyes quickly scanned the room, pausing on him. He's suddenly glad the phone call ended, fear of homophobia rushing back.
"Hello, Madison." He nodded at him, striding over to drop his things on the twin bed across from him. He wearily watched Burr, the unassuming appearance not helping.
"Burr," quietly acknowledging him, James mindlessly opened social media to avoid any and all conversation. They were both quiet individuals, so perhaps this could go well.
______________
Aaron didn't react to Thomas' coldness towards him, ever pleasant despite the snide remarks and glares thrown his way. Whether it was because he didn't notice, or just didn't want to acknowledge it, James couldn't be sure.
Thomas tutted, half mumbled insults tumbling from his tongue. The harsh clicking of keys made the steady thumping behind his eyes grow. If Burr didn't sit just feet away, quiet and calm and aware, James would find no problem in fixing his disastrous mood. He'd say to hell with mindless reading and busy work, work himself into the southern male's personal space. Kiss his mouth, face, whatever he could reach.
Suddenly, he grew to resent the boy across from him.
"Say, burr," Thomas started, itching for a fight. For a debate, or outburst, or something other than polite disconnection. Wide black eyes looked up, an empty void, carefully blank. " Crazy how the whole Internets' gone and kicked up a fuss over this Oscar thang, right?"
"I have been seeing it a lot," he nodded, full lips pushed. That gave nothing away, as did most of his responses.
"What do you think?"
"That people are putting too much attention on this," Burr went back to reading his book, painfully oblivious to the snarl adorning Thomas' lips. Or maybe just willfully ignorant.
"But what do you think about the slap!?"
"What do you think, if it's so important?" Exasperation, the first real emotions of the day. Thomas smirked, all teeth and ill-intent, latching onto his building irritation. With his fingers crossed behind his back, Thomas actuated his thick southern accent.
"Well I think Will was in the wrong, obviously. I mean, he's a comedian, it was just a joke. Honestly, if that woman can't like a little prodding from the public, then she needs to get a reality check." Thomas, too caught up in his rambling, failed to notice the open gaping Burr displayed. "Will's a fucking simp for that shit. He shoulda laughed along and said nothing!"
Burr stared with wide, unbelieving eyes, jaw slack. His mouth moved silently, still processing, still trying to respond and not give anything away.
"Poor got humiliated for nothin'"
"He deserved it!" He finally snapped, shell-shocked expression giving way to an icy rage. "Comedian or not, that's no excuse to openly ridicule a woman's disability on live TV. God-damn it, if someone did that to my wife, I'd slap the shit out of them too! So tired of this violence isn't the answer bullshit, It's not 'simp' behavior to fucking stand up for women!"
Labored breathing echoed in the now quiet room, the three men locked in a staring contest. The tension was almost touchable. After what felt like hours of half breaths and painful silence, Thomas laughed.
"See, that wasn't so hard," he drawled almost gleefully. Burr paused, brows drawn up as his lips parted slightly, waiting for the too-tall male to explain himself. "You finally took a stance on something,"
"What…?" James almost felt pity for the male, if not for the gratification of prying at least 1 belief from the male. His open expression of confusion and receding anger was cute, walls of discretion cracked. He blinked at that. Cute?
"You're a feminist and pro-disablity," he offered, smiling when the male shook himself from his reprieve. While his expression closed off once more, James felt accomplished. They were finally getting somewhere. " If we're going to live together, I need to know where you stand on this kinda thing"
"Yeah," Burr scooted back onto bed, all but burying his face into his book in an attempt to hide. Yeah… Cute.
_______________
"Nngh, Thomas," James breathed, biting his lip. The man in question straddled his hips, grinding down in rough movements. Hot breath tickled his neck as Thomas buried his face into the junction between his collar bone, his barely audible whimpers vibrating against his skin.
Their homework stayed long and forgot sprawled across the floor. He had been planning to finish it sooner or later, but Thomas had kissed him, and really they had the dorm to themselves, so why not?
"Oh Jemmy, fuck please Jemmy," He groaned, grinding against him harder. His begging, high-pitched and desperate, turned him on so much. He squeezed his waist, flipping them so he loomed over Thomas, papers wrinkling under them. Their clothed cocks created perfect friction, a promise of pleasure more than enough to unravel the usually put together male. He became nothing but soft gasps and blunt nails scratching his back.
"You naughty boy, we could've been doing that essay," he growled, mouthing at his throat. Neither of them left marks anywhere one could see, but he knew Thomas enjoyed the thrill of it. Pretending that maybe he'd bruise, maybe everyone could see who owned him. He whined, arching up into him. "God, do you deserve it? Deserve to come after you interrupted me?"
"No,"
"No, what?"
"No daddy," he hummed, face flushed oh so beautifully. "I've been bad, daddy, I need a punishment," and how was James supposed to deny him when he lay so hard and needy under him?
He all but ripped open his button down, ignoring his whimpers as he attached his mouth to his chest, sucking his nipples harshly. His hand attended to the other, twisting and pulling with aggression until they were hard. "Daddy! Daddy please, oh God," Thomas tangled his fingers in his hair, though knowing better than to pull. The way the honorific fell from his mouth made his dick strain.
“Oh god!” another voice squeaked, followed by a thud. They both shot up in surprise and fear, eyes landing on the figure halfway into the room. Burr clutched his messenger bag with a death grip, with his other bag already spilling its content onto the floor, and a furious blush rising to the tips of his ears. His wide eyes darted rapidly across their bodies, taking in everything they’d been doing, before meeting James’ eye. With something indiscernible flashing across his dark eyes, the short boy rushed from the room with a harsh slam of the door.
“Shit-” James pulled back as he scrambled for footing, fear grasping his heart painfully, “Shit shit shit,”
“You said,” Thomas croaked, clearly shaken from both the sudden intrusion and the denial of subspace. “You said the little freak would be out all day,”
“He was supposed to be studying with friends off campus,” he snapped, guilt rushing to fill what was once anger when Thomas flinched. Still sensitive. Deciding that running after the boy will prove pointless, James sits down once more, pulling his boyfriend into a kiss. “I'm sorry, it's not your fault, it's… oh god, what if he tells someone?” this got him to scoff, his usual prickly nature popping back up
“As if he’s got someone to blabber to,” he glared at the door, lips pressed into a thin line. “He’ll hold it over us, the snake, betcha. You know he’s after that student council position too,”
“We’ll just have to talk to him when he returns.” James decided, fingers finding their way into his perfect curls, now tasseled from their… Earlier activities. It’s enough to calm him, and the taller male relaxes into the floor, beckoning him to join. It quickly grows heated, James licking open his mouth and thrusting his tongue in hungrily. “Thomas…”
“Like damn hell I'm letting that bastard ruin this.” he growled, grabbing his face to kiss him harder. James is smart enough to pull back, shushing him when he whimpered. “James! Jemmy, daddy please,”
“I got you, baby,” he kissed his nose, tugging both of them to their feet. Thomas took a set on his bed curiously, while James locked the door, taking only a second to observe the bag. His laptop is poking out of the bag, and he takes the time to set it, and the bag, on Burr's bed. He hopes the only thing he’ll want out of this is a new laptop should it be broken. “Now, I believe you were in need of a punishment, huh?”
______________
“Burr,” they greeted as he reentered the room, still looking rather flustered. While his face didn’t betray these emotions, as it usually didn’t, his cheeks remained a darker hue than usual. His eyes lingered on the center of the room, flickering briefly to them before glancing away. James takes small pride in managing to flusher the boy so much.
“Madison, Jefferson,” with a stiff nod, he shuffles to his bed to avoid eye contact.
“I believe you were supposed to be off campus all day,” James started, after sharing a knowing look. He has never seen Burr so flushed before, and a small part of him thinks a good look for him. "And yet."
"Well, my plans fell through, I wasn't aware I needed to give a heads up to enter my dorm room," he shot back, putting away the scattered objects covering his bed as an excuse not to face them. Thomas had one thing right, the man knew how to hide his intentions.
"If you had, you wouldn't have walked in and seen something you shouldn't have," Thomas picked up, accent clouding his words more than usual. He leaned over the edge of their bed, a typical sneed playing his lips. To anyone else, he looked irritated, but James could see the subtle clenching of his fingers and the slightly off beat breathing.
"I apologize for not informing you," Burr hissed, finally in his tidying and having nothing else to busy himself with. With a soft huff, he sat facing them, a fake smile plastered on his face.
"And what you saw," his smile flickered into a grimace, teeth sinking into his bottom lip. The sight does something weird to James, though he doesn't linger on the odd feeling. "This stays between us, Burr,"
"Don't worry, I'm not inclined to discuss the, uh, sex life of my roommate to other people," his voice dropped into a murmer, as embarrassment took hold. James blinked at that. Burr was embarrassed at seeing them in such a lewd setting, and by the fact he could hardly hold eye contact, he got the feeling he wasn't inclined to hold it over their heads. How lovely.
"No one knows about us, and it'll stay that way," Thomas growled bluntly, as it seems Burr didn't feel like being particularly observant today. Burr rolled his eyes.
"Yes they do, or at least I do," he scoffed, shaking his head. "and Hamilton and co, " he added almost as an afterthought.
"The hell they do! We are not affectionate outside or anything," Thomas spluttered. Curiosity won over any lingering shame, enough for the other male to give them both a long, intriguing look.
"You're together all the time, attached at the hip, and you're only caring towards each other. Though, you aren't entirely obvious. I hadn't considered it anything other than a close friendship until Peggy asked," Burr hummed thoughtfully.
James could only frown. Peggy was the youngest Schuyler sister, and a freshman this year. Even with his claim that they'd been convincing, if someone James himself had never interacted with could guess their relationship, he worried who else could. They got far too comfortable.
"I won't speak on anything I've learned about today, and I'll make sure to tell Hamilton the same." As hard as it was to get a damn read on the boy, James could detect nothing but sincerity as he spoke. Well, that and a little fluster.
"I'll hold ya to that, Burr," Thomas said seemingly unconvinced, but understanding of the lack of choice. James smiled, and pressed a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth. Burr said nothing, glaring daggers into his laptop as he opened it.
"Aw fuck, I broke it!"
______________
Walking into their near pitch-black dorm room, James already knew today would be a weird one. He fumbled blindly, running his hand along the wall until he found the switch. His eyes, after adjusting to the sudden light change, found the groaning lump under a thick cover on bur's bed. He walked over, leaning over him.
"Are you good?" he muttered, jumping back when the lump rolled over, two tired, pain-filled eyes popping out, nearly purple bags weighing under them. He opened his mouth, but all that left was a soft groan, and he curled in on himself. Plump lips curved down, though James had a difficult time telling if the distaste was aimed at him or the situation at large. "Burr?"
"I didn't think you would be back today," He sounded so tired, so small. James raised an eyebrow at this. Sniffling, Burr rubbed his face into the soft comfort of his pillow to avoid his eyes. He let out a very gentle hum, sitting on the edge of his bed and hesitantly set a hand on his back.
"Thomas has a lot of debate work and I decided to come back so as not to get stuck in between another argument," He shrugged, eyeing what he could see of Burr's body in mild worry. With mild confidence, James could now say they were friends. Not particularly close friends, but it was better than whatever they'd had before. And as his friend, his well-being became a concern.
It suddenly occurred to him that he was probably sick, and there was a chance James could catch it too. Normally that would be enough to send him right back out the door with a 'get soon, buddy'. "Are you ok?"
"I'm fine, just a stomach ache," A weak smile pulled at his lips for a moment, falling back into a tight frown seconds later as if even that took too much energy. Once James moved himself back into his bed, Burr borrowed back under his mountain of comforters. He pulled out his laptop, booting up one of Washington's essay's.
While concerned for his health, he had enough respect to leave him alone. Being chronically Ill himself, James knew how frustrating it felt to have someone hovering over him all the time. Burr was handling himself nicely on his own. A few hours ticked by, James making a decent dent in his work, when something finally happened.
On his side of the room, Burr slowly sat up in bed, groggy and hunched over himself. He pushed back several of his blankets, only briefly moving the one covering his lap before tugging it back down. His breathing grew labor, something that pulled his attention away from his computer screen, and after a few moments the normally stoic boy began to cry.
James hurriedly made his way to the bed, kneeling beside him with unsure movement. Burr jerked his head up, black eyes obscured by tears tracking his movements, face hot with what he could only assume was embarrassment. It's an entirely new sight, a level of raw vulnerability that had him uncomfortable.
His arms wrapped around himself in a weak imitation of a hug, fingers gripping onto the sleeves of his oversized navy tee-shirt. A tee-shirt that belonged to Thomas. While he should have felt jealousy or resentment, James found the boy to be quite adorable, drowning in his boyfriend's clothes. What an odd thought. Before he could examine him any closer, especially his chest, Burr hid himself away.
"Don't look at me!" He wailed loudly, covering his face. James flinched, feeling at a loss as his voice grew shrill and painful to his ears. "Stop it!"
"Why can't I look at you?" He asked after a moment, tilting his head down so he was staring at the bed. In his peripheral vision, he can see Burr's hands coming down to hover over his stomach.
"Because I… I don't want you to!" Burr insisted after a moment of thought, breath ragged and choked. At least his voice had dropped from the painful screaming.
"Ok, I'm not looking," he reassured, holding his hands up and tucking his chin against his chest. Burr , pleased at his admission and obedience to his rather strange order. "Can you tell me what's wrong?"
"Stomach," he bit out, pulling a cover over his shoulders. His breathing grew unstable and quick, eyes hazy as the tears grew tenfold. "I can't get up. I can't-" James, wanting to do something, anything , gently grabbed his hands. Burr gasped, stiffening for a long moment, wiggling his fingers in the much larger hands concealing them. After seconds of still silence, he relaxed.
"It's a secret," Burr whispered, leaning in closer to James. Perking up, James hummed curiously. He bit his lip, a nervous tic for sure, and the weird feeling flashes through him. "Promise me you won't tell anyone else,"
"I promise." He agreed immediately, despite his own reservations. Burr paused, squeezing his hand tightly.
"I wasn't always a boy," it was a whisper of admission, as if even saying it was difficult. Once the words left his mouth, he curled up, quietly sniffling.
"Oh, is it your period?" He asked quietly. Another sniffle, and a nod. "That's ok, I won't judge you. You didn't judge me and Thomas."
"P-promise?" Feeling rather childish, James playful held up his right pinky.
"Pinky promise," although stupid, it had its desired affect. A burst of giggles escaped his mouth, and he wrapped his own pinky to complete the action. It's with a startling realization he noted Burr had never laughed, let alone giggled, before, not around him. Nor had he cried, but that was not something he wished to view again. His giggle, however, is a sweet sound. Like biting into a fresh pastry on a cold evening, or sliding into a hot bath in the winter. It warms James in a way couldn't possibly articulate accurately, the words just barely out of reach.
He doesn't have time to dwell on those thoughts or their possible meaning. All his attention was channeled into helping Burr, easily sliding out to the store and giving him the privacy to clean himself up. A smile tugs at his lips even as he stands in the feminine hygiene section of the local CVS, a little confused, but more than happy to have solidified their friendship.
He wondered to himself if he could get him to giggle again, or even to fully laugh.
______
Knowing about Burr–Aaron, he’s Aaron now– doesn’t change much for James. Sure, he leaves a few of Thomas’ hoodies and tee-shirts for him to steal (and privately thinks he looks perfect in them) but he’s surprised at how life just seems to move on. Perhaps the biggest change is the smiles. It's enough to completely derail him the first time it happens. He took notes for him during a particularly bad migraine, bringing a cup of his favorite Earl Grey for him to drink. The reward is a small, warm smile, completely different from the usual blank one he projects to the world. It's so genuine, so him , that James short circuits.
He gets to see these small, real smiles, more and more in the privacy of their room, or over their messy notes during a cram session, tucked into a corner of the library. It's a treasure, and he learns to treat it as such. Thomas only raises a brow at him, at the new friendship born between them. Thankfully, he’s stopped with the bashing and insults, as even he’s thankful for his silence on their relationship.
“You can tell him,” Aaron tells him, plugging his heating pad into the wall socket beside his bed. He’s in a simple tee-shirt and sweets, soft sighs leaving him as he presses the pad to his abdomen. Once again, James feels unexplainably odd at this.
“Tell who?”
“Thomas, it’s only fair since I know about you guys,” he explains, clicking his tongue dismissively at something on his phone. That's another thing that’s changed. How openly expressive he’s gotten around him, how he isn’t scared to scoff and glare and pout at something he found distasteful. It's new. It's so tempting for James to stare and memorize every new expression on his soft face. Odd.
“Are you sure?” James studies his face for a long moment, looking for any hint of discomfort, that he didn’t mean it but felt obligated on the basis of his own knowledge. Aaron offered that simple small smile, easily settling his worries.
“I need some tampons, so I was hoping…” his cheeks take on a darker hue as he tapers off, turning to James in a desperate silence. He nods, and pulls his phone out to send the appropriate text. Aaron slumps in relief, squeezing stomach and turning back to his phone. James finds himself staring just a second longer than what's appropriate, and busies himself with his reading.
Thomas is kinder than expected with the information. He does bring tampons, as well as lunch. With a very quiet thanks, Aaron excuses himself to the communal bathroom, and they start on the sushi. His concerned eyes roam over James as they eat in.
"Jemmy, he knows you're telling me, right?" He mutters, as if James was cruel enough to share such a dangerous secret after the other male worked so hard to protect them. "I know I call him slimy n shit, but I… I don't feel right using something like that against him."
"He knows. Why'd you think I got you to buy those things? Said it's like mutual destruction, but also he trusts you" James pops a roll of sushi into his mouth. He doesn't think any harder than he needs to about that, doesn't ever imagine giving away that information.
“Good,” Thomas hums in apparent relief, as if there was any chance James would’ve stooped so low. “I was wondering why he had my purple hoodie,” he points to said sweatshirt which was currently hooked on the end of Aaron's bed frame. James flushes, as there's no possible way to explain it.
"Dysphoria," James settles on. "I never say anything if he takes one," he elaborates, popping another roll into his mouth. Thomas nods in understanding, but he's too observant for own good not to notice. James had other reasons, reasons wasn't admitting to even himself, and least of all Thomas or, god forbid, Aaron himself.
Aaron slides back into the room, hands pulling at the collar of his shirt. He expertly avoids the body length mirror on his way to the bed, a usual look of mild unease on his face. When the mask wasn't up, he usually looked (and supposedly felt) nervous or on edge. James didn't feel comfortable opening that can of worms, so he accepted it as he did with any other of his odd quirks.
"You better like sushi, cause I got you some," Thomas asserted, thrusting the plastic try for Aaron to grab. He smirks at the over the top energy that Thomas always brought, and grabs it.
"Thankfully, I do," he teases, sitting cross-legged on his own bed.
"Nice hoodie," Thomas says with a devious smirk. He nearly chokes on his lunch, frantically looking from the clothing to Thomas like a guilty child now caught. James elbows his taller boyfriend, but it's useless. "Strange, cause I lost one just like it a week or so ago,"
"Um," he's at a loss for words, knowing damn well he's been caught. Realizing quickly that there was no getting this one, he sighs in defeat "I'm sorry I took your stuff, I… I don't own many large hoodies of my own, and I liked hiding my chest,"
Biting his lips, he can't possibly look Thomas in the eye. James' glued to the motion, to the slightly swollenness of it when he releases it to speak. The weird feeling is slamming full force into him now, and this time he knows exactly what it is.
It's want.
"I'm just teasing ya, Ron," Thomas winks, playful enough to calm Aaron down. The tiny smile is back, seemingly enough to shock him as it had done to James. But all James can focus on is this newly discovered desire.
He wants to kiss Aaron silly, kiss until his lips are swollen and bruised like they were after his constant nibbling.
James wants to kiss Aaron.