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Finney Gabriel Blake, the only survivor of the North Denver Grabber should be happy he escaped. He should be thrilled, yet he isn’t. He lies awake, hugging his pillow, thinking of his friends, of his lover, and the lives they could have lived. They should have lived, they should be alive right now, yet they aren’t.
Finney doesn’t cry. He hasn’t shed a single tear since it happened, and honestly he wasn’t sure if he still could. It was Robin's funeral earlier that day, Finney will never forget the look on his uncle and mothers faces, Ms Arellano tried to comfort him, but he wouldn't allow her that, he doesn’t deserve her comfort. Her son, Finney’s lover, his sunshine, was dead, and Finn was alive, how’s that fair?
But still Finney doesn’t cry. He wonders if he’ll always feel this way, maybe he doesn’t want to feel better, maybe he wants to stay grieving and guilty in fear of forgetting them, forgetting his friends, Griffin, Bruce, Vance, Billy and his Robin. He was terrified of losing his memories of them all the good times.
He finds himself wondering what their voices used to sound like, trying to recall every little conversation they ever had, small interactions that had seemed so insignificant at the time.
“Finney?” a voice calls out to him, but he doesn’t bother checking who, it’s probably just Gwenny, but he can’t bear to look at his sister. He’s so sick of all the pity and guilty looks.
“Finn.” the voice says. Oh Finn, Finney smiles at the nickname only Robin ever called him that, it was their little thing, wait Robin?
“Robin?” Finney looks up to see the other boy he’d been longing for standing right in front of him.
“Hey Amor, miss me?” He smiles.
“But how, I- you- you're dead! I went to your funeral today” Finney scrambles towards his lover grabbing hold of his cheeks.
“Ah yes, dead” he frowns a little “Finn I’m not here, well I am but only you can see me, it's like Gwen’s dreams, you can see me because of your mothers gifts, your gifts.”
“Oh.” Finney's smile drops, as Robin walks over picking up his guitar from Finn’s bedroom floor. He takes a seat on Finney’s bed, motioning for the Brunette to sit next to him.
“C’mon Querido, come sing with me one more time” His expression is soft.
Finney takes a seat next to him, resting his head on Robin’s shoulder as he starts strumming the strings of the guitar.
“Remember me..
Though I have to say goodbye,
Remember me, don’t let it make you cry,
For even when I’m far away, I hold you in my heart,
I sing a secret song to you,
Each night we are apart.”
Finney listens to soft hum in Robin’s voice as he sings, finally allowing himself to cry, clinging to the side of his lover.
“Remember me, though I have to travel far,
Remember me, each time you hear a sad guitar.”
Finney tries his best to wipe away his tears and fight the exhaustion that is finally hitting him as he tiredly sings along.
“Know that I’m with you the only way that I can be,
Until you’re in my arms again,
Remember me…”
Robin looks over to his sleeping boyfriend, kissing his forehead and laying him down.
“I love you Finney and I’m so sorry we have been torn away from each other in such a way, Goodnight Mi Amor and Goodbye, please always remember me”
Finney awakes in the morning with Robin no longer by his side, the only evidence of it not being a dream is the Grey bandana tied around Robin’s old Guitar.