Chapter Text
Clint hadn't slept in days, since Loki had taken away the love of his life. If Natasha had told him that Phil was gone before Thor had taken the trickster back to Asgard not even The God Of Thunder could have stopped him from sending Loki to whatever passed for Asgardian Hell. Clint didn't know where else to go to find peace other than Phil's SHIELD office. It had been Clint's safe place since Phil first recruited him.
Clint wrapped himself in Phil's well-worn, wool sweater and walked until he could hail a cab. Once he got to SHIELD, he went straight to Phil's office, locked himself in and lay on Phil's couch. Clint hadn't expected to feel even worse here than he had at Phil's brownstone. As hard as he tried, he couldn't hear Phil's voice in his head. When things had been particularly bad, Phil had sat on the couch with him and let him rest his head on his lap as he read to him. Clint had always felt soothed by Phil's voice. Clint remembered the first time that Phil read to him. Phil had lost patience with him, tossed a book at him and told him to read. That had been when Clint had confessed to Phil that he'd never learned to read. Phil had put away his paperwork, joined him on the couch and had started to read Kurt Vonnegut's Slaughterhouse-Five, or, The Children's Crusade: A Duty-Dance with Death to him. That had been when Clint had discovered that it was possible to feel safe and loved.
When Tony entered the kitchen, he looked at Natasha, frowned and said, "You look like somebody kicked your puppy."
"I can't find Clint," Natasha said. "He's not answering his cell and Phil's landlady said she saw Clint leave about 1:30 this morning from her her front window. I don't trust him not to--."
"That's what you think of me, Nat?" Clint asked as he came into the kitchen and felt the eyes of his teammates boring into him.
Natasha tumbled out of her chair where she'd been poking at her breakfast and took Clint into her arms. She whispered into his ear over and over saying, "You're okay."
"Phil would haunt me if I did anything to myself," Clint said.
"Where have you been?" Natasha asked.
"Phil's SHIELD office," Clint said. "I haven't slept--I'm not even sure when the last time I slept was. I thought maybe his office couch might help."
"No luck?" Natasha asked.
Clint shook his head looking like he could fall asleep where he stood.
"You can come home with me," Natasha said. "You can sleep with me."
"That's weird, Nat," Clint said. "It's like sleeping with your sister."
"How would you know," Natasha said.
"Pepper had to go back to D.C.," Tony said."I've been working in the garage all night. You can come sleep with me."
"She won't mind?" Clint asked.
"She loved Phil," Tony said. "She'd want me to keep an eye on you."
"Okay," Clint said.
"You'll have to read to him," Natasha said.
"You like to be read to?" Tony asked.
Clint blushed. "Phil tried to teach me when I first joined SHIELD. I can manage, but I was never very good. Phil used to read to me."
"What's your favorite?" Tony asked.
"The first book he ever read to. me was by Kurt Vonnegut," Clint said.
"I knew I liked you," Legolas," Tony said. "Which one did he read to you first?"
"Slaughterhouse-Five," Clint said.
"Everybody to the penthouse," Tony said, "for a puppy pile."