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Twenty-eight days. That’s how long it took Beatrice to return to the OCS in some capacity.
Flashbacks continued to haunt her- the echoes of voices no longer around, the eerie sounds of faint screams and groans- Camila sending texts expressing how much she misses her, Dora leaving her voicemails on how the new recruits were progressing- it was all too much.
She couldn’t rejoin the sisterhood… not at this point. But she could do something to help the cause, even if she wasn’t as involved as before.
“Your hair is different,” Mother Superion observed, her voice even.
Beatrice looked up and met her eyes, a slight smirk gracing her features, “I needed a change.”
Mother hummed in response and turned back towards her desk, “I imagine it’s beneficial on a hot day,” she commented, referring to the tight shave on the side of Beatrice’s head, “It suits you.”
Beatrice kept her eyes fixed on Superion, a smile overtaking her reserved expression, “Thank you.”
Superion nodded once before retaking her seat behind her desk, “What brings you back? I can’t imagine you’d want to rejoin the order.”
Beatrice stared at the wood grain on the desk, analyzing the words, “Not as a sister, no,” she stated softly, her eyes meeting Superion’s curious gaze, “As an independent fighter, like Mary.”
Beatrice watched as something flickered behind Superion’s eyes, her throat bobbing with a tight swallow, “I see no reason not to agree to this,” she replied matter-of-factly, occupying her hands with some of the papers on her desk, “Would you be willing to help with the new recruits? You still remain one of our most accomplished warriors.”
Beatrice’s eyes lingered on Mother Superion before fixing down at her hands, cracking her knuckles in thought, “I see no reason not to,” she agreed, looking back up to meet Superion’s eyes, “As long as I am granted access to what I once did.”
Superion stared at Beatrice, and the former nun could’ve sworn she saw something akin to pride behind her eyes, “Archives, artifacts, weapons, the works,” Superion replied, Beatrice nodding once in confirmation, “Consider it done.”
That was nearly two weeks ago.
Beatrice made good use of her access to the OCS archives, researching any information on the afterlife, salvation, heaven- anything. Anything that will give her answers as to why she still heard Ava’s voice echoing in her mind, guiding her every action, influencing every emotion.
Once she felt as though the moon had risen high enough and nearly all of the sister warriors turned in for the night, Beatrice would help herself to the courtyard for midnight training.
It wasn’t the most optimal hour, no, but it allowed Beatrice to mistake any fallen tears for sweat, and any burn in her chest from lack of oxygen, not from the lack of someone’s presence.
She wouldn’t always be moved to tears; sometimes anger took root during these sessions, with plenty of splintered and broken bo staves to note it.
However, on the fortieth day of Ava’s disappearance, Beatrice felt the symbolism to be too great to withstand.
On her fifth round of shadow striking, she fell to her knees, her chest heaving rapidly as she begged herself to not break despite her emotional fracturing.
She choked on air as she dropped her head to the ground, the roughness of the stone against her forehead grounding her to the earth as her mind carried her to heaven.
To Ava.
Her lungs in a vice, she gasped for breath as sobs overtook her, the former nun eventually gaining enough strength and will to pull herself into a sitting position, tears shimmering in the light of the moon.
She held her hands out to her sides, closing her eyes as she tilted her face up to the sky.
“Give me a sign,” she prayed, her chin quivering as her eyes opened to fix on the moon, pleading, “Lord, show me that she’s alright.”
She closed her eyes again, allowing the silence of the night to surround her, deafening in its emptiness as Beatrice recognized that she was, in fact, alone.
Several meters away, energy pulsed in the middle of the courtyard.
Beatrice’s eyes snapped open as her pupils dilated at the sudden undulation of the energy before her, an electric blue light now suddenly enveloping the courtyard- a yellow glow soon following.
Beatrice felt her heart stop.
Ava, just as Beatrice had last seen her, levitated out from the rift, halo aglow with power, her arms stretched out to her sides. When she opened her eyes, Beatrice noticed their golden glow, her expression giving away nothing but power and divinity.
Had she not been in shock at witnessing the scene before her, Beatrice would have moved forward to meet Ava, but her awe overtook her instincts, and soon the rift was closing, and Ava’s ethereal light faded, her body collapsing to the ground.
Beatrice reacted immediately, jumping to her feet and sprinting towards the girl she thought she had lost for good. Nearly falling to her knees, her eyes scanned Ava’s body for injuries.
Thank god, she thought, her hands immediately moving to cradle the smaller girl, moving so that Ava laid across her lap.
Her trembling hand moved to cup Ava’s cheek, feeling the clamminess of her skin and exhaling sharply in both relief and anticipation.
“Ava,” she whispered, her voice quivering as she ran the pad of her thumb back and forth against Ava’s cheek, “Ava, please hear me.”
Holding back tears was impossible at this point, Beatrice’s eyes overflowing as the rivulets ran down her cheeks. She closed her eyes as Ava lay still against her, a choked sob escaping her lips as she leant down, placing a lingering kiss to Ava’s forehead.
When Beatrice pulled away, she leaned her forehead against Ava’s, “Come back to me, Ava, please.”
The halo-bearer laid still even then, the only indication of her life being the slow but steady beating of her heart, the faint rise and fall of her chest.
An intake of breath.
A shift.
Beatrice didn’t move when Ava’s eyelashes fluttered open, her eyes immediately finding Beatrice’s, and she smiled.
“Hey,” she said weakly, that dopey smile on her lips that Beatrice missed so dearly.
Beatrice stared at her as she felt joy bubble up in her chest, a laugh escaping her as her tears continued to flow. She let her heart guide her actions as she placed another kiss to Ava’s forehead, the halo-bearer closing her eyes as her hand covered Beatrice’s against her cheek.
When Beatrice pulled away for a second time, she was caught by Ava’s touch, the smaller girl reaching to place her palm against Beatrice’s face, her fingers brushing against the skin just below her ear, “Talk to me.”
“You’re real.”
Ava’s smile reached her eyes.
“I’m real.”
“You’re here.”
Ava stroked her thumb against Beatrice’s jaw, nodding softly.
“Pretty sure, yeah.”
Beatrice laughed again, leaning down to press her forehead against Ava’s for a second time, this time allowing herself to brush their noses together. Ava pressed her fingers lightly against Beatrice’s neck, signaling her consent before moving up to meet her lips.
It was so, so different from their first.
This held no sadness, no hesitation, no doubt.
Just pure understanding of where they stood, how much they cared, their devotion to one another.
Beatrice moved slowly as Ava kissed her again, the feeling of her nails scratching against the base of her neck grounding her, prompting her to wrap her arms around Ava fully, pulling her up into a sitting position.
When they pulled away, Ava’s hands never left Beatrice’s face, her thumbs gently wiping away residual tears, Beatrice’s hands holding onto Ava like her life depended on it. Their eyes never left the other, not even when Ava ran her thumb across Beatrice’s lips, not even when Beatrice kissed Ava’s palm.
Completely and utterly consumed in adoration.
“I love you,” Beatrice breathed, earning a smile from Ava, “I love you and I need you to know that.”
“I know,” Ava replied softly, leaning in again to kiss her sweetly, “I’ve always known.”
Beatrice breathed a laugh as she leaned into the kiss, supporting Ava in her arms as they drank in the other, making up for a fraction of the lost time they wanted back.
When Ava pulled away to breathe, she moved to embrace Beatrice, pressing their bodies together as close as she could manage. Beatrice returned the gesture in kind, burying her face into the crook of Ava’s neck as she cradled her head, breathing in her presence.
“I love you, Bea,” Ava whispered, receiving a squeeze from Beatrice before feeling a gentle kiss against her neck, “I always will.”