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The Bronya couldn’t sleep again (Mr. Welt always said it was because her body was getting used to the Core of Reason, but they both knew otherwise). However, this time wasn’t because of a Homu Kingdom boss battle (Alloy_Bron had to take a break for a few weeks during her unconnected disappearance).
Seele . Bronya floated down the halls as she passed each nameplate. Empty (They were still looking for that idiot) . Mei . Empty ( She was put there to watch over the students). Theresa. And Seele .
Gently, she tapped her knuckles against the door (It used to take a literal fire alarm to wake everyone up. Kiana’s pizza burned toast stunk up the dorms for weeks).
The door swung open—. It was Seele. Her eyes twinkled blue in the dim lighting of the hall, but Bronya could tell it was her anyway.
Just the way she held herself: slightly nervous but expectant told her so.
“The Bronya just wanted to meet with the Seele.” This was a check up in disguise, but there was no reason Bronya would tell her that.
“I-I see.” She still stuttered. Seele stepped aside to let Bronya in.
Floating in, Bronya didn’t notice anything. The plushies were lined along the wall like the ones at home used to be. There were pictures of all the kids from the orphanage, except one of them had her face scribbled on.
Bronya could almost imagine how that girl in question would respond, but this visit wasn’t about her anyways.
“Hey!”
“Oh no, Liliya! Sin’s gone crazy!” A pink-haired girl ducked behind her twin as the short-haired girl glared at her.
“The Bronya feels as if nothing has changed when standing here.” Her therapist told her to be more vocal about her feelings whenever she had them since “communication is the key to a functional relationship”.
Seele’s hesitant reaction told her all she needed to know. Everything had changed.
Seele was no longer the cowardly girl who had to hide behind Bronya in the face of danger. And Bronya was no longer the closed-off girl who stopped her world at the orphanage.
Both had gone through experiences rendering them completely different. Seele’s old plushies will never be recovered and so will that part of her who always marveled at the new things Bronya had to show her.
Bronya had many friends from Mei, even Kiana Idiotka, and Fu Hua. And she had experienced loss that Seele didn’t know of.
It was almost reassuring seeing Seele’s new room resemble her old room, but both were deeply aware, almost achingly, that they were like strangers to each other now.
Will they fit together anymore? If this was a question asked one or even a few years ago, Bronya’s answer would’ve been certain. Of course they would.
However, it’s been several years since Seele had been trapped in the Sea of Quanta, and now was the time they had to confront this important question.
“Seele…How was it—?”
Seele gently placed her finger in front of Bronya’s face. It shook as Bronya gazed upon her broken-hearted expression.
They both yearned to go back to normal, but they had transformed in little ways that even they have no knowledge of.
“Bronya….I don’t really want to talk about this now…” Her hands trembled as she placed them again in her lap.
But they had to.
“We should get to know each other again.” Bronya stated. There couldn’t be room for doubt or else they will never move past this block in their relationship.
Seele averted her gaze from Bronya’s. That determination she had seen in the Sea of Quanta was dampened.
Bronya didn’t even have to think about her next action; she pulled Seele into a hug. As tight as she could, as if to subsume her lost lover. Their temperatures warmed the other. And Bronya could no longer feel Seele tremble.
She couldn’t even feel Seele’s tears on her hair. But everything would be fine.
That was something she had to just believe in.
Eventually, the two of them drifted off to sleep in their embrace.
Bronya woke up. It was still nighttime; the clock showed that it was 3am.
Why had she woken up? Seele was still at her side sleeping peacefully. Bronya didn’t even wake up from those nightmares she used to suffer from.
But she was lonely. Himeko was gone . Kiana disappeared to who knew where. Mei isn't doing very well nowadays.
Sometimes, when Bronya passed by Kiana’s room, she could hear quiet sobbing. She knew it wasn’t a ghost, but she never knew what she could do to comfort that voice. Tell her that everything was going to be okay? That Kiana was definitely alive?
At the time, she didn’t even know that for Seele. But now, she felt like she didn’t even have the right to say that to her.
“Bronya…” Seele mumbled in her sleep and Bronya froze. Seele turned around and rolled onto Bronya.
She was a little too heavy to sleep with, but Bronya didn’t want to move her. Seele was just recovering from being in the Sea of Quanta. Her eyebags after she got out were very deep, as if she suffered from jetlag.
After kissing her forehead, Bronya shuffled slowly deeper into the bed’s covers and closed her eyes.
1…2…3…4…
1…2…3…4…
1…2…3…4…
1…2…3…4…
1—
Opening her eyes again, she was greeted with Seele’s red eyes. They squinted in judgment as Seele spotted the eyebags that Bronya now sported.
“Bronya, did you not sleep well?”
“Yes, I just had some worries on my mind.” Bronya pushed herself to sit up. But Seele just grabbed her arm and pulled her down back into bed.
“Just go to sleep for a few more hours. It’s not like we have anything to do today.” Seele pouted as she said this, so Bronya smiled indulgently and closed her eyes.
“Are you asleep?”
“Yes.”
“…” Seele sighed, letting a puff of air tickle Bronya’s face. “You’ve really changed, haven’t you?”
“Affirmative.” Bronya didn’t joke around like this a lot back then. “St. Freya had changed the Bronya.”
“And the Sea of Quanta had changed me and her.”
“So, Seele is going to talk about it now with the Bronya?”
Bronya could feel Seele fidget around as she anticipated her response.
“Well, it’s not like we can ignore it forever…” Seele’s tone changed, and Bronya could almost imagine those beautiful sea eyes staring at her.
“Yeah, we can’t.” Bronya searched for Seele’s hand and grasped it. “We don’t have to start over from scratch.”
Squeezing her hand, Bronya started.
“The Bronya went to school after you disappeared. At St, Freya, in fact. She met many new friends and her favorite teacher there. And she learned that she could be betrayed by her family.”
Bronya continued to squeeze Seele’s hand.
Seele’s voice trembled. “I know, actually. I’ve touched upon worlds similar to this one, in which you’ve met those people. And others in which you met other people. But in all of them, you always changed from the Bronya I used to know.”
There it was: the sadness that neither could stay the same, but if they had, both wouldn’t have made it this far.
“We’re both different, and that’s fine.” This was the words that she had learned under Mr. Welt’s tutelage. Change was an inevitable part of life, but it didn’t mean that either of them should make it more difficult for the other by ignoring it.
“The Bronya still loves you. Do you still love her?”
“I do.” Bronya could faintly hear sniffling from her, but she didn’t open her eyes.
“Then, we will be just fine.” She smiled.