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The arrival of Cardinal Copia to the Ministry was no small affair. At least, not when looking at the bigger picture. The man might have gotten there on his own, carrying a boom box to give his entrance a bit more of a dramatic flair in the hopes of impressing Papa Nihil, the current Pope of the Satanic church. And despite Copia later coming to realize that his effort was in vain, he stood his ground anyway.
With Papa Emeritus III forcefully retired by his father, and said father being too old to replace his son in the role of frontman of the Ghost Project, there was no other choice than to get an “outsider”. Someone outside the Emeritus bloodline (or so is believed) that could take over lead vocalist duties without a hitch. And it fell upon Sister Imperator’s shoulders the task of finding said ideal man.
Up until that point, the Cardinal had been residing in Italy, as many members of the Clergy do in order to complete their studies or just to work in the churches that still stand within the country. After being summoned by Seestor, he took the first flight that would lead him straight to L.A.
Copia landed in the City of Angels amidst turbulent times for the church. As a replacement and stand-in for two Papas, he was under a lot of pressure to out-perform any other potential contenders. Because, despite Imperator being the one to personally ask him to step in as Ghost’s new frontman, he didn’t know for sure if he was the definitive choice, nor the only option.
Being the new face in an unfamiliar place, as well as feeling under constant scrutiny, the Cardinal felt extremely alone in that new environment. Sometimes, especially late at night amidst anxious sleeplessness, not even Sister Imperator’s reassurances or his ambition to one day become Papa Emeritus IV were enough to console him. He was left feeling devoid of comfort and joy.
His attempts at befriending the wary ghouls that remained after Terzo’s “retirement” proved unsuccessful at first, which of course didn’t help to cheer him up at all. It wasn’t the demons’ fault, though, since they were trying to recuperate from the trauma of seeing their former frontman being dragged off stage in the middle of a ritual. Aether, Dewdrop, and Mountain just couldn’t trust the newcomer right off the bat. Especially after the rumors of Copia being hand-picked by Imperator, who played a key role in Terzo being kicked off the band, were gaining traction amongst the Clergy.
So, the poor, lonely man turned to the only source of solace he knew since he was a little boy. The companions that never left his side nor judged his flaws. The ones that despite being unable to talk and understand human communication, seemed to totally get Copia.
Said furry little friends the Cardinal brought to the Ministry with him, all the way from Italy, were rats. Five rats, to be precise. (And they were all named after famous rat and mouse characters from animated movies.)
Mickey, Minnie, Jerry, Speedy, and Nibbles had been some of his closest friends since childhood. He befriended the little rodents as a kid living in an abbey and suffering from bullying and ostracization from the other kids. He always had to hide his unusual pets given that they are considered dangerous pests by humans.
So, to avoid losing some of the few beings that didn’t treat him like shit, he went to extreme lengths, including but not limited to: hiding them in his room; keeping them tucked inside his jackets whenever he needed to move them; spending considerable amounts of money in food and accommodations; even making a pact with an undisclosed high-ranking demon in order to prolong the lifespan of the rodents. That’s how and why the rats are still alive to this day.
However, what he has always failed to see, in part thanks to his meticulous care for the small creatures but also given that all the places he had lived in housed cats, is how dangerous the animals can actually be. And when moving into the HQ of the Ministry, back in Sweden, all hell broke loose given that the abbey was vacant of any rodent-specific predators to keep the population under control.
It only took a little bit of unwilling negligence from the Cardinal, who was too preoccupied with the responsibilities carried by his new position and with living up to the expectations his superiors had, for the rats to run amok on the grounds of the Ministry’s property. And, soon enough, five rats turned into a full-blown infestation.
What was baffling at first ‒to everyone except Copia‒ was how the rats appeared in the first place since the abbey used to be free of rodents. Until the arrival of one particular Cardinal, who found himself having to answer a few questions regarding the sudden materialization of animals that weren’t there not long ago.
Of course, he tried to play dumb and shift the blame, arguing that the rats were there because of the lack of any bigger predators that served as pest control. The timing of his arrival was just a coincidence, according to him, not a causality.
That led Sister Imperator to have a terrible idea, as she often does when it comes to punishing people.
As she knew that Copia was the one behind the rat chaos, and despite not wanting to torture the man, she ordered him to deal with the problem unless he wanted to be shipped back to Italy and never become Papa. That was enough of a threat to scare the man into action. And the only plan he could come up with that wouldn’t result in the death of dozens of frail little animals was to enlist the ghouls to help him.
Cats would hunt and kill the rats without a second thought, but the demons could follow commands such as “search and retrieve unharmed”. Although, he should have seen it coming that tasking a ghoul of such chaotic and unpredictable nature as Dewdrop with hunting anything would end with something catching fire.
He learned that the hard way.
It didn’t take long after Copia launched his “Catch All Rats!” operation for him to be summoned to Sister Imperator’s office. He knew why he was being called over there, yet he thought he would only find Seestor inside the sizable and well-furnished room. However, to his detriment, he also found Papa Nihil sitting on a couch to the right of Imperator’s desk.
As soon as he walked in, the woman motioned for him to take a seat in front of her and the whole scene reminded him of the times he was called to the headmistress’ office back when he was a little kid getting in trouble at school for standing up for himself against his bullies. Still, he gulped visibly and sat down straight, daring to look Seestor in the eye as well as to ignore Nihil’s intimidating annoying presence.
With the Cardinal’s arrival, Seestor proceeded to commence her interrogation.
“So, tell me, Cardinal, what happened exactly?”
“There was a fire in the chapel,” Copia succinctly explained.
“And how did that happen?” She pressed for further details.
“The fire ghoul, he found a rat nest inside the organ,” an increasingly distressed Cardinal informed. “He thought the best way to flush the rats out would be to shoot fire down some of the pipes.”
“And who allowed the fire ghoul to use…fire?”
“I…I did, sort of,” he confirmed while he winced. “I told all the ghouls to use any means necessary to capture the rodents.”
“Did that include lethal methods?” Imperator inquired with a raised brow.
“Uh, not explicitly, no.”
“I told you he isn’t ready to lead the Ghost Project,” Nihil chimed in, without being invited to join the conversation. “He can’t even get rid of a bunch of filthy rats.”
“They are not filthy. Unlike you,” a sullen Copia muttered under his breath.
Upon hearing the Cardinal whisper something to himself, which Nihil interpreted as being aimed at him, he grew irritated with the other man’s disrespectful demeanor.
“What was that, boy?!”
“Nothing, Papa.”
Copia’s response was subdued not because he feared Nihil in any way, nor was it because he actually respected the scornful man, but rather because he didn’t want to invoke Seestor’s ire. Nevertheless, the tense exchange between the two men was enough to make the woman snap and call them both to attention.
“Enough! I told you to deal with this, not to make things worse,” she warned with a grave tone, addressing only Copia. “Get rid of the rats without any further property damage.”
“Yes, Sister, at once,” the younger man assured as he got up and before departing. “Sister. Papa.”
The Cardinal solemnly bid farewell to both of his superiors, his intonation of Nihil’s title sounding more spiteful than that of Imperator’s. Still, neither of the elders commented on the obvious difference between tones of voice, allowing him to exit without further ado.
“I told you, Seestor,” was Nihil’s dry comment after the door closed behind Copia.
“Oh, stop it, will you?” She interrupted before the older man could complain further. “He’s got a lot of potential, it’s just that he’s under a lot of pressure.”
Despite Imperator’s reassuring affirmation, a stubborn Nihil grumbled his insistence on what he had been saying ever since Terzo’s “retirement” took place.
“I should be the frontman of the band‒”
“Don’t start with that shit again! You can barely sit through a long car ride without shitting your pants,” she accused without reserve.
“That was only one time, and because I had a stomachache!”
No matter how Nihil tried to defend himself ‒and his embarrassing unfortunate accident‒, Imperator disregarded him completely and gave out the usual ultimatum as well.
“You are not going back to being Ghost’s frontman!”
Meanwhile, not far away from Seestor’s office (yet far away enough for her and Nihil’s argument not to be heard), Copia was telling the ghouls involved in the rat hunt how his meeting with the woman went.
The three demons were sitting side by side on a bench placed against a couple of pillars that support the roofed corridor that connects the main offices’ building with the abbey and that it’s flanked by gardens. Dewdrop and Mountain took each end of the bench while Aether sat between them.
The first to interrupt Copia was Dewdrop, who asked a question as soon as he heard the Cardinal mention the fire he started. He looked curious and slightly annoyed, drumming his clawed fingernails atop his crossed arms.
“So, are we in big trouble?”
“We?!” Aether exclaimed in alarm and indignation, tail tensing next to him.
“I think you’re the only one that’s in any real trouble here, Dew,” an unfazed Mountain pointed out in his accustomed monotone drawl.
“What, why?! You guys broke shit too!”
“Yeah, by accident, and only a few vases and small objects,” Aether defended.
“We didn’t intentionally start a fire inside the chapel,” the earth ghoul added.
“It was a controlled fire!”
Regardless of the fire ghoul’s ardent attempt to defend himself, the quintessence ghoul was buying none of it.
“Then what happened?”
“It got out of control.”
“See?”
Mountain’s rhetorical question, asked to no one in particular since it meant to point out his fellow ghoul’s reckless and dangerous behavior –which landed them in so much trouble– was enough to invoke said demon’s explosive anger. At the same time, the Cardinal could only stare silently at them.
“Why don’t you say that to my face, tough guy?” Dew challenges as he leaned forward in order to look at the drummer past Aether. “You think you can say whatever the fuck you want just because you’re hella tall?! I’ll show you‒”
“Boys, boys!” Copia finally cut in to dispel some of the rising tension. “My boys, this is not the time to start fighting among each other. It doesn’t matter what happened or who did it…”
“Yes, it does,” Mountain sourly insisted.
“…What matters is that we still have a task to complete, least of all we want to be skinned alive by dear Sister.”
Pointing out the risks they were all facing was enough to cut some of the tension remaining in the air, as well as to prompt Aether to play the mediator role once he got up from the bench.
“The Cardinal is right. We need to get rid of the rats or Imperator will get rid of us.”
“Whatever,” Dew scoffed as he turned his head to his left, avoiding everyone’s gazes. “My plan was flawless; you idiots just can’t understand my genius.”
The fire ghoul’s narcissistic comment was enough to incite a scathing response from the earth ghoul, who was following after a retreating Aether.
“Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if she got rid of Dew.”
“Hey! I heard that!”
A fuming Dewdrop quickly got up from the bench as well, being the last to do so, before stomping after the other demons. Surely to talk their pointy ears off with complaints and empty threats of violence.
As the ghouls went on their merry way, bickering all the while, they left behind a stunted Copia, who still didn’t know how to process the demons’ volatile dynamics. Nevertheless, he seized the opportunity to make what he believed to be an inconspicuous escape toward his private chambers. There, he made sure that his beloved pets were safe and sound and would remain so. And despite feeling bad for the tragic end most of the other rats would meet, he was relieved to know that the ones he cared about the most would remain out of harm’s way.
Or so he thought until he noticed that he had left his door slightly open and standing on the other side, somberly looking in, was Nihil, a judging stare present on his decrepit face.
After that, the Cardinal was forced to let go of his rats, in a clandestine way to make sure that they wouldn’t get improperly disposed of. Not that they could be killed, since they are basically immortal thanks to the pact he made decades ago. Either way, he had to make sure he could convince both Nihil and Seestor that he was completely rat-free.
Nihil still complained, of course, but no one really listened to him, Imperator being already fed up with his usual bullshit and Copia mourning the loss of his precious companions.
He was heartbroken for losing his oldest and closest “friends”, but at the same time, he was content with knowing that they would survive and maybe even thrive out in the wilderness. After all, they wouldn’t suffer any harm from other animals or humans.
And maybe, just maybe, one day he would meet them again.