Work Text:
Mo Guan Shan wasn’t afraid of blood. He was a delinquent, as his teachers would call him. He’d been in more fights during his high school career than he could ever hope to count. He was the type of guy to wipe the blood dripping from his nose onto his hand and keep walking like it was nothing. It was his normal. It was nothing.
He Tian’s hand had been properly bandaged by his brother’s people, but flashes of crimson still echoed in Mo’s mind. His heart was pounding, even with She Li gone. Sweat dripped from his brow. It wasn’t quite the overwhelming fear that had taken hold of him before, but he couldn’t quite place it.
He Tian walked over to Mo, blowing away his thoughts and anxiety like dandelion seeds in a gentle wind.
“Where… are you going after this?” Mo asked, the words sticking in his throat. It was probably because it was still sore.
He didn’t say, “Don’t leave me.”
“I don’t know,” He Tian responded. His voice was quiet, but rougher than normal from the fight with She Li. A bruise was already beginning to form on his throat where She Li choked him with a metal rod.
“He Tian…” he started, looking up into those dark eyes. There were too many things to say. Are you okay? Thank you. I’m sorry.
Mo wasn’t sure which to choose. He needed more time. At that moment, all he knew was He Tian couldn’t leave. Forced to stand by and watch He Tian fight his fight, the one thought running through his mind was that She Li would win and he’d never see He Tian again. He’d never get to feel his warm embrace after a hard day. He’d never get to show him another set of good marks on an exam.
The pounding in his chest continued, but it wasn’t fear or anxiety.
“Come home with me,” Mo blurted out. He Tian smiled and Mo’s heart ached.
“W-why are you injured again?” Mo’s mother said as soon as she opened the door. Her hand trembled as she reached out to touch the bandage on Mo’s cheek. Her touch was gentle as only a mother’s could be.
“Mom, He Tian was the one who helped me,” Mo said quickly. The last thing he wanted was for He Tian to be turned away due to a misunderstanding.
He didn’t say, “He saved me.”
“Everything is settled now,” Mo continued. “I won’t get into fights anymore.”
His mother’s thumb paused on the bandage as her eyes raked over his face and neck, taking in all of his injuries. He didn’t know what else to say to comfort her. After all he’d done to stay away the past few days while the marks on his throat healed, he’d still had to come home covered in bandages. Maybe they’d talk about it one day. Today, he just needed to feel safe.
“Okay…” His mother nodded, letting her hand fall from his face and leading them into the house. He heard the click as the lock fell into place behind him and his shoulders slumped from relief and exhausted.
“I made soup,” his mother said as they walked into the kitchen, placing full bowls in front of the empty seats at the table. “You boys each have a bowl.”
Mo’s eyes followed her as she went back to the kitchen, tending to the rest of the soup. He took a sip from his bowl. The broth went down easy, despite the pain in his throat. There was nothing quite like his mother’s cooking. The warmth from the soup spread through his body, easing the rest of the tension from his muscles. He wished he could have it more often.
His eyes fell on He Tian where he sat between Mo and the kitchen. He took a sip from his bowl with his bandaged hand. Mo almost visibly winced, but He Tian appeared as calm and collected as ever. It was like nothing ever got under his skin. Except Mo. He had seen one too many haunted expressions on his face to think He Tian was indifferent to him. He just couldn’t figure out why.
“It tastes good… Really,” He Tian said. He wasn’t quite smiling, but his voice sounded the way Mo felt. It was soft and calm. In that moment, Mo saw their future. He saw himself coming home from work and starting dinner. He saw He Tian coming home a little later, settling his things down in the walkway and making Mo his first stop. He saw them ki-
Mo stood abruptly, grabbing He Tian’s hand and dragging him away from the table. He led him to his bedroom, letting the door shut behind them. He didn’t let go of his hand until they were alone.
“He Tian…” Mo started. His thoughts continued to race, but he wasn’t sure which to let free and which to keep for himself. He Tian leaned closer. His hand found Mo’s, the bandages rough against his skin. Mo intertwined his fingers with He Tian’s, giving them a gentle squeeze.
Mo could feel his heart beating wildly in his chest. He was surprised He Tian couldn’t hear it. Maybe he could. He felt warmth creep into his cheeks as he reached up with his other hand and placed it firmly behind He Tian’s neck. His thoughts stopped. Time froze. He Tian inched closer, his other hand finding its place between Mo’s shoulder blades. Mo let his eyes flutter shut as their lips met.
This. This was everything.
It wasn’t like anything Mo had experienced before. He Tian’s lips were soft and gentle against his. He let He Tian’s fingers untangle from his own and wrap around his lower back, pulling their bodies together. Mo let his free hand clench He Tian’s shirt between them, trying to keep his balance when the world felt like it was spinning. Any remaining fear or nervousness disappeared in He Tian’s embrace. He was safe. He was home.
He Tian held him close, deepening the kiss. Something stirred in Mo’s lower abdomen-
“Y-you can come over anytime if you feel like having soup,” Mo said, pulling away quickly and letting his hands drop. The heat in his cheeks exploded. “My Mom probably doesn’t dislike you too much…”
He didn’t say, “I like you.”
He Tian’s arms stayed firmly against his back, leaving only a few inches of space between them. Mo was grateful for the closeness. He felt like he should say something else to break the silence, but the words evaded him. All the words he wanted to say were fighting in his chest. Once again, pride and embarrassment choked him, forcing down anything that might have risen to the surface in such an intimate moment.
“Mn, anything else?” He Tian said lowly. Mo glanced back at him to see He Tian’s cheeks tinged with the same pink that must have been burning on his own. It brought him comfort to see He Tian’s feelings laid bare on his face. He wasn’t the only one feeling, wanting.
“One more thing,” Mo said, turning to his desk. He took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart. He felt He Tian grab his hand, ready to pull him back if he tried to leave. Another ache throbbed in his chest. He Tian didn’t want him to leave. He didn’t want them separated, even for a moment. Some part of Mo knew this. He’d known for a while, even before he peeked at He Tian’s notes.
will he be sad if I leave
He didn’t say, “I’m not going anywhere. I’d miss you too much.”
Mo pulled open a drawer and grabbed the disposable piercing kit he’d bought, placing it in He Tian’s hand.
“I already bought a piercing kit… Once your hand is better,” Mo said, scratching awkwardly at his bandaged cheek, unable to meet his eyes. He Tian had told him to pierce it because he liked him, not to prove a point. He hoped He Tian understood what he didn’t say.
He Tian’s fingers wrapped around Mo’s chin, turning his head forward so their eyes met.
“Look at me…” He Tian said slowly. Mo hadn’t noticed when his expression turned serious. He felt the weight of that gaze like a gazelle standing face to face with a lion, ready to be devoured. In another life, it might have turned his blood cold. Now, it weakened his knees. He sat back against his desk with his hands resting on the edge for support. He let He Tian press a leg between his, closing the distance between them once again. He Tian’s finger hooked underneath Mo’s chin, his thumb caressing his lips.
“Little Mo, you’re the one who saved me,” he said. His other hand came to rest against Mo’s cheek as well, cradling his face like it was something precious. His eyes drank him in like he was something desirable. Mo swallowed as He Tian’s thumbs traced over his lips again. His skin vibrated with nervous energy. He couldn’t take his eyes off He Tian. He didn’t know if he could ever let go of him again.
“I’ll obey your every word from now on,” He Tian breathed into the few inches between them. “What do you want? Tell me…” The deepening flush on his cheeks was not lost on Mo.
Mo pointed a finger up toward He Tian’s face. Try as he might, the words still wouldn’t come. They’d never been his strong suit.
He didn’t say, “You. This. Us.”
But He Tian understood. He always understood. Mo let his finger rest on He Tian’s cheek as the distance between them dwindled once more.
“Little Mo,” He Tian breathed into the mere centimeters between them, “I’ll give you anything you want.”
Mo Guan Shan wasn’t afraid of blood, but he might be afraid of this. He was afraid his feelings might swallow him whole. He Tian had fought for him. He always fought for him. Mo thought he might be ready to fight for this.