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The juice box in his bag had split and ruined all the contents inside.
Yuzu had been horrified when she opened it and the strong smell of orange juice hit her. She kept despairing about every item she pulled out, one by one, exclaiming how she would try to dry and fix it. When she pulled out his iPod though, dripping in sweet sticky liquid, she seemed to give up on the fact that she could return everything to how it previously was.
Mizuiro raised an eyebrow in question when Ichigo showed up at school holding a red satchel the next morning.
“It’s Karin’s.” He muttered. “Spilled something in mine. It got ruined.”
Keigo made fun of him for it. Uryuu just looked at it with his usual disdain. Ichigo flipped him off. Chad didn’t say anything. Orihime thought it was cute and ‘a nice change’.
At some point, all their words just blurred together.
It wasn’t until the sun had properly gone down did Ichigo get back home. He had been making deliveries after school, and it had taken him a little longer than anticipated because he got held up by one of the customers. Regardless, he was home now, weary to the bone and wanting to do nothing but collapse on his bed. As he changed, he could hear Kon pittering around in his closet. Ichigo hoped he wouldn’t speak. He didn’t feel like holding a conversation at the moment.
There was a quiet knock on his door once he’d tossed his uniform in the hamper. Karin poked her head in, holding up his bag.
“Thanks. That was quick. ” Ichigo muttered, taking the bag from her. Karin hummed and yawned, leaning against the doorframe.
“You know how Yuzu gets.” She gave Ichigo an almost scolding look. “Why’d you have that juice box in there? The packaging said it expired months ago. Also, you don’t like orange juice.”
Ichigo scowled at her, rummaging through the bag and looking at everything inside. He was surprised to see that almost everything looked intact. Except his iPod which was not turning on no matter how much he poked and prodded at it.
“I forgot to throw it out.” He spat. He didn’t like having to explain anything. He was tired and Karin was acting like it was his fault.
(It was.)
She blinked at the acid in his tone, straightening up and scowling back at him. “I don’t know what your issue is, but I don’t appreciate the way you’ve been acting. Either fix whatever problem you have or handle your shit yourself. Yuzu isn’t your servant.”
She grabbed the door handle and stepped out, giving him one last withering glare on the way before the door slammed shut.
Silence fell on the room. Kon had stopped shuffling around, probably listening to the conversation. The air was still. Ichigo’s hold on his satchel tightened until his knuckles were white.
What did Karin know? She was unaware of the million thoughts spiraling around Ichigo’s head. She couldn't fathom his anguish, his helplessness. She didn’t understand what it felt like to lose his powers and go from being so dependable to being so useless. She didn’t know what it was like to have not seen Rukia for the last eleven-
Stop.
A deep breath.
Ichigo’s grip on his bag loosened. He relaxed his jaw and let his shoulders drop. There was a slight creak and his closet door opened, Kon peeking through the miniscule crack and peering at him.
“You okay?”
No. “Yeah. Fine.”
The newly cleaned bag hit his desk with a thump. Some shuffling later, the covers were pulled up to his chin and he stared at the bare ceiling. The closet door shut again with a soft click.
Something in Ichigo’s mind seemed to have settled. To him, it felt like he had spent so long using every fiber of his being to not think about Rukia, that the minute he had pictured her in his brain, all his efforts had left this body. He felt hollow and empty, and all he could see was the last of her face as it disappeared right in front of him, tarnished by the look of sadness in her eyes.
That night, he didn’t fight off his thoughts any longer. He let himself think and he let himself dream of her. It was no use trying to avoid it. He missed her terribly. The days were hard enough without her there, how could he deprive himself of her thoughts during the nights too?
On his way to school the next morning, Ichigo stopped at the tiny convenience store he frequented and bought a juice box, stashing it in the far corner of his newly cleaned bag.