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It was early autumn. Late September, maybe. Leighton Murray had been at Essex College for approximately too long. College is supposed to be where you ‘find yourself.’ You make the friends that will last with you for a lifetime. Leighton had always grown up, with her Dad singing his praises of Essex College : His alma mater! Then, Leighton’s older brother, Nico, went to Essex College. Everytime she went on Instagram, his pictures of parties and drinks dominated her feed.
When it came to applying to Colleges, Leighton too applied to Essex. It was what she was meant to do. Right? She looked forward to spending college life, accompanied by her two best friends, Francesca and Esme. That did not go to plan.
Instead, she sat in her room. Her room, which she shared with her roommate, Bela Malhotra. Bela was currently at the Catullan, probably drafting a hilarious comedy sketch. Creeping out of her room, she appeared to be alone. Kimberly, who was miserably failing her subjects, was out at the library, desperately fighting to raise her D in Economics to a slightly more respectable C. Whitney was probably practising soccer, playing with her teammate Willow.
Whitney was Leighton’s favourite roommate. When Essex Women’s Soccer Team last had a match, Leighton, Kimberly and Bela went along - to support. Kimberly, spent the whole time with her head in a book, praying the words on the page would diffuse into her brain. Others in the stand chanted rhyme after rhyme - cheering the team on. Bela joined in. Meanwhile, Leighton watched in awe. In awe, at how effortlessly Whitney could kick the ball from one end of the pitch to another.
When Whitney scored the final goal, during extra time, Leighton was drawn to Whitney’s smile. It spread across her entire face, lighting up her eyes. Leighton knew some of the other women on the team ; Willow and Jena. Willow and Jena, and everyone else on the team (including those who had not played that game) ran over to Whitney. Swamping her, they all came together, forming a large hug.
Leighton’s reflection was interrupted by a text on her phone. It was from Alicia.
‘You on your way?’ It read.
Leighton’s heartbeat picked up. Frantically looking around the room, her bag was at the end of her bed. Packing it last night, Bela asked where she was going. She pretended not to hear, what would her response be? Grabbing the bag, Leighton started the short walk to Alicia’s, hoping no one would see her on the walk there.
A few weeks ago, Leighton got into some trouble. It turns out that underage drinking, and defacing campus property does not go down too well. She was sentenced to 100 hours of community service. 104 if you count the 4 hours that did not get put down from the poetry night. She begged, and begged to serve hours anywhere other than the Women’s Essex Centre. Improv! She would sooner do improv. When that did not work, she tried bailing her way out, with her Mom’s money. 3 Russian billionaires send their kids to Essex, a few hundred dollars would not make a difference.
As much as Leighton begrudged helping at the Women’s Centre, there were positives. First, Tova, who was almost too cool to be there. Last, Alicia. Whenever Leighton was with Alicia, she immediately felt calm. Even after Alicia had just kicked someone, Leighton still felt as if she was meditating. With Alicia, Leighton felt as if she was a different person. A version of herself that she actually liked.
Whilst Leighton was arranging a surprise party for her brother, Nico, Alicia had suggested that the two get out of town for a day. As nice as it was for the two of them to watch eight continuous episodes of Housewives, and sleep in each other’s arms, Alicia was becoming restless of being imprisoned in the same four walls.
***
Following a long car ride, which was only made better through carefully selected songs, the two arrived at their hotel. Glancing at her phone, Alicia declared how they did not have long. Leighton was still clueless as to what they were doing.
‘Is my outfit okay?’ Leighton asked. Alicia smiled, anything that Leighton wore was okay. Today, she had a plain black dress on.
‘You might need some make-up’ Suggested Alicia.
Leighton delved through her bag, selecting the eyeshadow palette that would best compliment her dress. Sitting by a mirror, she swiped the brush against the right shade, then applied it gently above her eye. Having much experience of getting ready for night outs, she was ready within record breaking time. One thing was missing. Eyeliner. She always struggled with eyeliner. The wing was either too long, or too short. On the rare occasion that the wing was the perfect length, they did not match. One angle would be slightly too off.
Picking up on Leighton’s hesitation, Alicia offered to apply the eyeliner for her. Alicia left the bed, joining Leighton on the floor. Placing the eyeliner between her fingers, Alicia, placed her free hand against Leighton’s arm steadying her. Leighton needed steadying. Inside her, it felt as if there were hundreds of caterpillars, emerging from their cocoon, metamorphosing into beautiful butterflies. As Alicia drew the wings, the butterflies learned how to fly, flapping their wings constantly.
‘All done.’ Alicia put the lid back on the eyeliner. She noticed Leighton’s pale complexion. ‘You okay?’ Leighton was speechless. Trying to nod, her face moved up, then down, by about one centimetre. Alicia moved closer to Leighton, pressing her lips against her cheeks.
‘Hope I did not ruin your makeup.’ She laughed, then got up, collecting her bag and coat, ready to take Leighton on her first date outside of her flat.
***
The hairs on Leighton’s arm stood up. This time, she was actually cold, not nervous in the presence of Alicia. Her shivering was becoming pathetic now, with her teeth chattering. Alicia pulled Leighton into a hug, rubbing her hand against her back.
‘We’re nearly there.’ Alicia explained. ‘In the meantime’ she removed her jacket, placing it around Leighton’s shoulder.
They really were nearly there, with Alicia seeing the sign in the distance. Alicia had planned the trip, and so carefully selected a bar. A lesbian bar. The sign was illuminated, with the name of the bar in the middle, and rainbow lights flashing. Pointing towards the bar, signalling it out, Leighton was overcome with nerves.
A lesbian bar? What if someone saw her? What if someone posted a picture, and she was in the back of it? Then what? Her flight or fight kicked in. Except, her flight took over, and instead of turning around, she headed straight towards it. They say, opposites attract. Perhaps, there was a magnetic force between Leighton and this bar, compelling her closer and closer.
Alicia was at the bar, ordering drinks. With her back towards Leighton, she could not see how Leighton was desperately trying to calm herself down. Breathe in. Breathe out, You’ll be alright. This ritual was interrupted by a hand placed against Leighton’s shoulder. She knew, it was not Alicia’s though. Alicia had rings decorated all over her hand, and this hand did not.
Turning around, Leighton immediately recognised her. It was Chloe. Her long, black hair framed her face. Her face, which earlier that month, Leighton had her lips against, tracing down to her neck.
‘Hi.’ Chloe blushed. Conveniently, Alicia strode over to the table, a drink in each hand.
‘Thanks.’ Leighton took a glass off Alicia, downing the fiery alcohol, anything to avoid talking to Chloe.
‘How do you know Kelsey then?’ Chloe engaged with Alicia instead.
‘Kelsey…’ Alicia was lost. Leighton fought with the drink in her mouth, forcing it to go down her throat.
‘We’re girlfriends.’ Leighton announced. She expected everyone to turn. To stare at her. No one did. Chloe, just nodded, exchanged pleasantries then walked away.
‘We’re girlfriends?’ Alicia looked at Leighton.
‘Shut up.’ Leighton’s hand found itself against Alicia’s jaw, as their lips pressed together. The kiss didn’t last for long, as Alicia pulled away.
‘I love this song!’ Leaving the drinks on the table, Alicia pulled Leighton from the chair. Forcing her onto the floor, she interlocked her fingers with Leighton’s. They moved their body in time with the music, allowing their questionable dance moves to take centre stage. They remained on the dance floor all night, even with Leighton’s feet aching from being trapped in heels.
At one point, electricity shot through the dance floor.
‘Now, it’s time to welcome a drag queen to the floor!’ Announced a loud voice, with them drawing out every last syllable.
‘Miranda Penis!’ The crowd roared, with Miranda being a well known name in Vermont. Alicia, and the rest of the Women’s Centre, nearly saw Miranda earlier that year but instead, attended a frat party. The whole night that Alicia was at the frat party, she wished she was witnessing Miranda instead. In fact, the only memorable part of that night was Leighton.
It was where the two girls shared their first kiss. Fairy lights twinkled in the background, illuminating the dark sky, along with the dancing stars. With Leighton’s hand placed gently against Alicia’s waist, she felt the most safest and secure she had ever been. Nothing could harm her.
Leighton’s hand rested against Alicia’s wrist now, with the occasional tapping of Leighton’s fingers against the table.
‘You good?’ Alicia asked. She questioned, whether bringing Leighton to a lesbian bar would have been the right decision. After all Leighton was not out yet. She did not respond and momentarily, Alicia thought her girlfriend was about to cry.
‘It’s perfect.’ Leighton whispered into Alicia’s ear, causing her cheeks to flush an awkwardly bright shade of red.
The two girls stayed until the end of Miranda’s set and ended the night with a few shots, accompanied by more worrying dance moves. As they walked back to the hotel, Alicia wondered, who was Kelsey? Maybe she was drunk.