Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

In the hot water of the tub at the Tendo household, a young boy stewed (in more ways than one).

They'll find out eventually, he thought with a sigh. Might as well go out as I am.

Just as he was exiting, a knock sounded on the door. "Daddy? Are you in there?"

Ranma gulped. That was the voice of the girl he'd just been sparring with, he was pretty sure. The one who...

"I'm just glad you're a girl."

"I couldn't stand to have lost to a boy ."

Well, maybe just a little while longer, he thought, creeping back to the washing area.

He poured a bucket on himself just as the door opened.

"Oh, Ranma! You should have said it was you!"

Instinctively he covered his crotch before turning around. "H-hey Akane."

"Did your hair just change colors?"

"Ah, nope, nope, that's crazy!"

"That's true... hair definitely doesn't spontaneously change colors, but..." Akane hummed doubtfully. "I could have sworn it was black when I opened the door..."

"You musta been seein' things," he said, buckets of sweat pouring off of him.

"I guess... Hey, where are you going?"

"I... 's your turn to use the bath, right?"

"You don't have to leave, silly!" Akane said with a giggle. "We're both girls, after all."

"Uhhhh. Yup. Sure are. But I was done anyway, so..."

"Aren't you going to use the hot tub?" Akane asked, frowning.

"Uhh, nope, it's too hot for that."

"You're shivering ."

"'S a martial arts training technique okay bye Akane!"

Akane was left, blinking, at the door the redheaded girl had slammed behind her. That was weird. And... why would she cover just her crotch?

A couple hours later, as he idly performed easy katas in the dojo, Ranma was starting to feel anxious.

He hadn't seen his pops in a couple hours. Which meant that he was off somewhere pulling some scheme. Which meant they were probably going to get run out of town, and he would somehow take the worst of the blame, even though he hadn't done anything.

And here he was hoping he'd actually get the chance to make friends, for once.

Stupid of him, really.

"Daddy! Girls! Dinner's ready!"

Well, he might as well take advantage of the Tendos' hospitality while he could.

(A small part of him wondered why he hadn't been called to the table, then realized he was included in 'girls', and wasn't sure how to feel about that. The rest of him ignored that part.)

As the four girls gathered around the table, the eldest among them frowned. "Has anyone seen Daddy?"

"Not since that disaster of a family meeting," Nabiki replied, Akane and Ranma echoing their agreement.

"How odd," Kasumi replied. "I wonder where he is. It's not like him to–"

She was interrupted by a knock at the door, which she immediately went to answer, the others following behind her.

She was greeted by a policeman with his hat in his hands. "Are you the daughters of Soun Tendo?"

Three of the girls nodded warily, and the policeman continued, "I'm so sorry to have to tell you this, but..."

"A shootout between two gangs?"

The policeman nodded. "Your father was caught in the crossfire. If it's any consolation, he died instantly, with no pain."

It clearly was no consolation. Kasumi was openly weeping, Nabiki had a stare that could pierce a steel wall, and Akane looked like she was barely restraining herself from lifting the table and using it to clobber the culprits (or the messenger).

"I hate to ask anything of you at a time like this," the policeman said, reaching into his coat, "but there was another man he was with. Can you identify him?"

The three Tendos all shook their heads blankly, but the moment Ranma laid eyes on the photograph—"Pops!"

"Wait, you are?" the policeman asked.

"R-Ranma. Ranma Saotome," he replied, his throat seeming to close up. "Th-that's my pops, Genma Saotome."

"I see. Well, he also died quickly, he would have been unconscious within seconds."

Ranma knew how they felt, now; that meant absolutely nothing to him. 

"Ah, can I take you to your mother, or other relatives, perhaps?"

Ranma shook his head. "Pops's all I got. Had."

It was just... surreal that he was gone, and to a gang war that had nothing to do with him, of all things.

"We can take her in, at least until things are settled," Kasumi offered through her tears. "We all lost someone today, after all." She forced the most hollow smile Ranma had ever seen onto her face.

The policeman bid them farewell, or something, Ranma wasn't paying attention. It felt like the world was sliding past him, nothing was quite in place.

Pops was gone. One of the fundamental forces of the universe, gone. Could the world even make sense, without him?

At least I don't gotta tell Akane I'm a boy.

Ranma slapped himself. Why would he think that , of all things?!

Chapter Text

Nodoka Hashimoto frowned at the man before her.

"You're telling me that there are four girls, of whom I'm meant to be the guardian?" she asked.

"Yes, ma'am."

"And that, due to my name change, they have been living on their own for five months while you searched for me?"

"Y-yes, ma'am."

She glared daggers (and threw one, which whistled past his neck) at the apparently incompetent lawyer. "Tell me they haven't been homeless, at least."

"N-no ma'am! Mr. Tendo left the dojo to them."

"Oh, Tendo's girls! Funny," she frowned, "I was never all that close to them..."

"Well, ma'am, technically they were supposed to be taken in by Genma Saotome, but–"

" Do NOT. Speak to me about that man," she hissed, before taking a deep breath to calm herself. "But I understand perfectly, now."

"Actually, ma'am, I should tell you that he–"

" I said. Do. Not. Talk. To me. About. Genma. Saotome. "

"R-r-right." The lawyer gulped. "Shall I guide you to the dojo, then?"

"I know perfectly well where it is. I will consult you if I have need of you," Nodoka said frostily.

"Right you are, ma'am. Be seeing you!"

Half a city away, Akane Tendo fumed.

"I don't see why we need a guardian now , we've managed just fine for the past five months!"

"What's the big deal, 'Kane?" Ranma asked. "It ain't like you even met her, yet. For all we know, she could be real nice!"

"I don't fucking care how nice she is!" Akane yelled. "It's different for you, you never had a mother!"

"Hey, low blow," Ranma protested.

"She can't replace mom, or—" fat droplets rolled out of Akane's eyes, "—or dad..."

"Now Akane, no one's suggesting she'll replace them," Kasumi said as she emerged with a kettle. "But we've only been squeaking by these months; having another adult around would surely help."

Ranma edged away as Kasumi poured her tea. She honestly couldn't believe how lucky she'd been, to avoid being splashed all this time. Especially given how much she'd been splashed before she started pretending to be a girl full-time.

If nothing else, she'd expected Akane to walk in on her in the hot tub, one of these days. (She hadn't used it at all, the first couple weeks.) But after that first time, Akane had always knocked before entering the bathroom.

She still wasn't confident enough in her luck to not be careful around tea. But she did at least drink tea, now.

"Anyway, what if she's awful?!" Akane continued. "What if she says I can't keep doing martial arts, or Nabiki has to stop working with Hibari, or Ranma–"

Ranma raised an eyebrow at the sudden stop, but said, "Hey, ain't nobody sayin' you have to like her. Just give her a chance, yeah?"

Akane sighed deeply. " Fine . So when's she supposed to get here, anyway?"

On cue, the doorbell rang.

 "Would you get that?" Kasumi asked Akane, turning back to the kitchen.

"I'm not ready!" Akane protested. Turning to Ranma, she demanded, "You do it!"

"Pfft, and fifteen seconds'll make the difference?  Do it yerself!"

"Fifteen seconds is enough to get my expression under control, at least! You get it!"

"Ah, that's just yer face, tomboy, if she got a problem with that we ain't gettin' anywhere!"

"Listen here, airhead, if she's gonna have a problem with anyone's face–"

"Would you two quit arguing and get the door already?!" Kasumi snapped. “At least pretend to get along.”

Akane turned a chagrined look toward Kasumi, and Ranma took advantage of the distraction to toss her across the room. She tucked into a neat roll, shot a glare back at Ranma, and tried to wipe it off her face as she opened the door to admit–

"Yeesh, what took you so long, Akane?" Nabiki demanded, standing in the doorway.

"Oh, it's just you," Akane said, letting her rictus slip.

Meanwhile, Ranma offered a wide grin and a "Hey, Nabs."

"Ah, I see. My little sisters have been arguing again, huh?" Nabiki asked fondly.

"Do they ever not?" Kasumi returned wearily.

Nabiki laughed joyfully. "No, I suppose not."

Akane smiled. Getting to hear that laugh again was one of the few good things to come out of the last few months.

The other good things included, obviously, Ranma and–

"Ranma!!" A familiar, distant voice called. "Prepare to die~!!"

Ranma's face fell. "Aw, no, not today! 'Kane–"

"On it!" Akane returned as she dashed out the door.

Sure, Ranma would almost certainly disagree. But...

"Ah! Violent girl!"

"Hey, Shampoo. Any chance I can get you to put off killing Ranma?" Akane asked.

"Hmmm... Shampoo suppose she can spare a few minute," she replied, punctuating her sentence with a kiss.

...at least to Akane, Shampoo was also one of the good things the last few months had brought.

"I still don't see why you insist on that disguise," Nabiki said to Ranma, who was marching downstairs wearing a fake mustache, a sarashi binding her breasts, and a deep frown. As well as the boyish silk outfit she'd first arrived in.

"It works, don't it?!" she snapped back. Plus, I can't let myself forget I'm really a guy.

"Sure, but so would, like, a frilly dress and a wig, I bet."

Ranma quashed the spark of... hope?... those words ignited in her. "I—I can't risk it. She'll kill me, Nabs."

Nabiki sighed but dropped it, and a peaceful minute was spent drinking tea.

"They must really be going at it out there," Kasumi commented mildly.

"Yeah," Ranma said with a shudder. 

She didn't know what kind of weapon Shampoo used to make those little round, red bruises, and frankly she didn't want to. Few people scared Ranma Saotome, but Shampoo was one of them. 

She just thanked her lucky stars that Shampoo wasn't out to kill Akane , and so left it at a few bruises.

Trying to kill her , she could deal with. I probably deserve it, anyways.

The door opened, and behind it stood Shampoo and Akane, flush with exertion. Ranma noted with satisfaction that Akane had managed to disarm Shampoo and inflict a few of those bruises herself.

"Ranma not here, Shampoo see," she said, eyes flicking across the table and resting on Ranma.

"That's right," Ranma said in the fake deep voice that made her want to gag. "And she won't be anytime soon."

"I'd pour you a cup of tea, but I'm afraid we're expecting an important visitor soon," Kasumi said.

"Hmph." Shampoo glared at them. "Fine. Shampoo kill Ranma some other day."

As she left, she gave a dishonorable blow to Akane's rear while she wasn't looking. Akane yelped and turned to fight back, but Shampoo was already out the door.

Akane peered out the blinds for a couple seconds before announcing, "She's gone. You can take off that ridiculous disguise now, Ranma."

Ranma huffed to cover up the sheer relief that brought her. "No more ridiculous than your disguise for Kuno."

Akane flicked her on the forehead. "Just go change already, airhead."

Nodoka hovered outside the house, her hand on the bell-pull.

They're probably just as nervous as you, if not more. Like bears! Just picture them as bears!

This did not help.

Finally her nerves and her knees gave out, and she pulled on the bell-pull by means of collapsing to the ground.

The door was promptly opened by a kindly-looking young woman. "Oh my!" she said with a quiet gasp. "Are you all right?"

She smiled up at the girl and accepted the proffered hand. "I will be, I think. You are one of the Tendo sisters, correct?"

The girl nodded. "Tendo Kasumi. And you would be Mrs. Hashimoto?"

" Ms. Hashimoto," she corrected. "... But you can call me Nodoka. After all, we are... meant to be family now, yes?"

"Of course, Ms. Nodoka. Come in."

Nodoka tried not to bristle at the impersonal address. She had, after all, only just met the young woman; she could hardly expect anything else.

As she followed her young host to the table, she looked over those already gathered there. On the left stood a girl with a bob cut and what looked like a fitted suit without the jacket, who watched her curiously but with a guarded expression. In the middle, a girl with a pixie cut wearing a tank top, who scowled at her. And on the right...

On the right, a girl that looked nothing like the others, but did look hauntingly familiar.

Nodoka realized she was staring. "Ah! Apologies."

Kasumi smiled gently at her, then turned to her sisters. "Girls, this is Ms. Nodoka Hashimoto. Ms. Nodoka, these are my sisters, Nabiki–"

"Charmed," the professional-looking girl said.

"Likewise," Nodoka returned.

"Akane," Kasumi continued.

The tomboy huffed and turned away.

"... Nice to meet you?" Nodoka ventured.

"Sure."

"And Ranma," Kasumi concluded.

Nodoka gasped as she placed why the last girl looked so familiar. She didn't look related to the Tendos, but she did look an awful lot like the face in the mirror.

"Somethin' wrong?" Ranma asked.

But... it couldn't be. She had a son .

"I'm sure it's just a coincidence," she said, as much to herself as to Ranma. "I... I've just got that man on my mind, today, and it's making me see things that aren't there."

"What man?" Ranma asked innocently.

" Genma Saotome, " she spat.

"Ya knew pops?" Ranma asked, immediately following it with, "What'd he do this time?", confirming beyond doubt that they were talking about the same Genma Saotome.

Apparently, she was wrong.

Her 'son' was actually her daughter.

"Many things," she said, trying not to choke up. "But the worst, by far, was stealing away my–"—she caught herself before saying 'son'; the Tendos might not know—"–my daughter before I even got to see her lovely face."

"Ah geez, that's low, even for pops. Maybe we can find her again... how long ago was this?"

"She's talking about you, airhead," Akane cut in.

"What? No." Ranma scoffed. Then, a moment later, understanding hit her like a speeding panda. "Wait. Really...?" Ranma said in wonder. "...Ma?"

Nodoka opened her arms. "Come here, my child."

"Ma!" Ranma cried, and cried as she hugged this woman that was apparently her mother.

But like all good things, this too couldn't last, and Ranma stiffened up in her mo– in Nodoka's arms as the horrible thought struck her.

I'm lying to her.

My own mother. The lady who pushed me out from between her god damn legs. I'm lying to her about my gender.

How does she not realize??

And how the FUCK did I get here?!

Chapter Text

Something in the air felt sus.

Nabiki prided herself on being able to observe, ascertain, and retain everything about everything and everyone. Nothing could happen without her knowing about it, and no one could come near without Nabiki learning everything there is to know about them.

And her expert instincts said there was definitely something odd about the relationship between Ranma and her mother. 

The first hint—if something she was subjected to constantly over the span of three hours qualified as a "hint"—came during the grocery run, the day after Nodoka’s arrival. It was supposed to be Ranma’s turn to do it, but Nodoka insisted on assisting, and (for some unknown reason) voluntold Nabiki to join as well. 

And during that entire trip, from the tedious walk to the 3/11, to that ridiculous display at the soft serve, to the agonizingly long detour to the nearby clothes stand… she found it impossible not to notice that Ranma was acting off. She spoke in a higher pitch, giggled at anything and everything, twirled her hair, and generally acted like a massive ditz.

It felt like she'd decided, for some reason, that she had to put on a disguise, rather than let her mother see the real her. And clearly, she wasn't any bigger a fan of how she was acting than Nabiki was; as the night went on, she slipped more and more, to the point where Nabiki had to cover for her, much to her annoyance.

At the time, she'd dismissed it as just Ranma trying to make a good (if inaccurate) first impression. But then, a few days later, there was the Sashimi Incident.

Nabiki was at work at the time, but from what she gathered after the fact, the situation was thus: Kasumi had been ejected from the kitchen to relax (already a mistake; she relaxed best while cooking), while Ranma and her mother made dinner.

What actually happened was disjointed and inconsistent between accounts—Akane swore there had been at least one explosion, while Kasumi insisted on the presence of a ghost—but everyone agreed it had started with a series of knives being thrown at Ranma.

(Nabiki checked out the scene, afterwards, and found it difficult to interpret. Knives in the walls, flour and sugar everywhere, a pan deformed with the shape of a handprint, globs of burnt rice stuck to the windows, a giant mallet embedded in the ceiling…

The question of where the mallet even came from still haunted her.)

Amazingly, dinner turned out well, and Nodoka apologized for the incident, blaming it on her own lack of grace, but Nabiki found it hard to believe a disaster of this extent could be caused by a simple bout of clumsiness.

Which brought her back to her collected hints, and the third hint was a doozy: Ranma’s extreme caginess around bathing. Of course, it was one of those hints that was there from the start: Ranma had always been nervous in the bathroom, especially after being walked in on by Akane that fateful night, and had rarely used the furo in general. But after Nodoka had arrived, that caginess had intensified into outright terror, to the point that on some occasions, the door would be barricaded. (From the outside, sometimes; Nabiki wasn't sure how Ranma managed that.)

Even with all that, though, she might not have put it together without a chance encounter.

She bumped into Nodoka—literally—just as the woman was leaving the house, grumbling to herself. Nabiki didn't catch everything she was saying, but she did distinctly hear "...can't back out of the contract. Does honor mean nothing?"

"Where are you headed?" she asked Nodoka after rising to her feet. (Look, sometimes the direct approach just works , okay?)

"Oh, I just have some things to take care of at my old house," Nodoka replied dismissively.

"Can I come with? I'd like to see your place." Which was true; she'd love to snoop around and find out what makes her new guardian tick.

"No!" Nodoka cried. "I mean—you just got back from work, right? You should stay here and relax with your sisters!" And then she fled before Nabiki could argue further.

Every aspect of this encounter stuck in Nabiki's mind. What kind of contract was she thinking about breaking? And why was she so against me seeing her home—what didn't she want me to see?

And later that night, it all clicked: it was a seppuku contract! Probably one binding Ranma to become a woman among women, or something like that.

That explained so much! Not only about the last few days—though of course it did explain those incidents. Of course Ranma pretended to be extra girly, if the penalty for masculinity was death! Of course she would have to dodge knives—she must have made some mistake while cooking, leading to Nodoka attempting to enforce the contract; salvaging the meal must have redeemed her in her mother's eyes. And of course she would hide her body—Nabiki hadn't seen Ranma naked, either (due to said caginess) but she imagined her short gremlin body might not measure up (snrk) to womanly ideals.

But it also explained so much about Ranma's life. What kind of mother would just let her daughter be taken away by her father? One that had assurance that said daughter would turn out alright. What kind of daughter slips into masculine behavior just after hearing her father's died? One that never had the chance to, before. What kind of father obsessively trains his daughter in martial arts? One that's very motivated to ensure she grows up well.

And if Nabiki didn't quite understand the connection between martial arts and being the perfect woman, well, it just meant that Nodoka had some unusual ideas about femininity, right?

While initially she was simply happy to have figured it out, Nabiki soon found herself fretting over Ranma's potential fate.

This led her to the rare position of not paying attention in class. (Not that she always paid attention to the teacher , but she always paid attention to the class .)

"Fair Nabiki! What ails you so on this fine day?" came an unwelcome voice.

Nabiki rolled her eyes. "Hey, Kuno-baby. So I'm 'fair' now, am I?"

"Any damsel is fair whence in such distress as thou appear!" Kuno proclaimed. "Beside which, your foul aura has decreased greatly, these past months."

Great, thought Nabiki. Just what I need to hear, I'm losing my touch.

"So?" Kuno pressed. "What cause the consternation in thy eyes?"

Nabiki sighed. "Nothing you can–"

She stopped as an idea struck her, and a grin began to form. "Actually, maybe you can help. Any chance you could come by the dojo tonight, say around six, and challenge my little sister?"

"'Twould be my pleasure!—but did you not bar me from challenging my fierce tigress at thy home?"

"My other sister, Kuno-baby."

"I could never!" Kuno shouted. "Kasumi is far too delicate a flower to engage in combat!"

"My other sister, Kuno-baby."

Kuno's eyes narrowed in confusion, then widened in understanding. "Thou mean—my dreams of Akane's long lost twin returning have come true? O joyous day!"

Nabiki stared through half-lidded eyes. This kind of crap was why she called him a baby all the time. " Ranma , Kuno-baby."

"Of course!" Kuno exclaimed. "Who else could combine such beauty and strength than my tigress's own twin! All is explained, now!"

Nabiki blinked. That sure was a conclusion he jumped to… it just wasn't worth it to try to correct him, though.

( When did she start considering Ranma her sister, anyway? )

"So, will you do it?" she asked.

"Mayhap," Kuno responded, an unusually sly look on his face. "If you desire it so, however, I must ask: what shall you grant me in exchange?"

Nabiki grimaced. Damn! I really am losing my touch! "I…"

"Yes?"

"I'll…" she attempted.

"Go on?"

"I'll… I'll owe you a favor," she bit out.

"Holy shit, you must really want this," Kuno said, startled out of his… unique mode of speech. He rallied himself and continued, "Then shall it be so."

"Oh, one more thing, Kuno-baby?"

"Yes, deal-maiden?"

"No holding back, this time."

As Kuno froze, Nabiki grinned. Nodoka wanted Ranma to be good at martial arts? Well, she'd see just how good she was.

Returning from her work with the Oozoras—they'd uncovered some new blackmail that she couldn't wait to use—Nabiki was greeted by the aroma of frying beef. Her mouth began to water in anticipation of delicious yakiniku, or maybe gyukatsu… maybe even a steak, but that seemed a bit Western, and Nodoka and Kasumi were both very traditional.

Her excitement was only dampened by the thought of impending Kuno. She just hoped Ranma would deal with him quickly enough to keep the food from getting cold. She had no doubt who would win, but if Kuno really didn't hold back, it could take–

Nabiki’s thoughts were interrupted by the sound of splintering wood.

"Oh my!”

Nabiki looked over to see a knife embedded within the table, just inches away from Kasumi.

Handle-first, somehow.

————

“I apologize for that.” Nodoka said, as she started carefully extracting the knife from the table. “I really must improve on my knife handling.”

"It’s fine," Kasumi replied, even though it wasn't. "I've had closer calls;"—she hadn't—"there's a truly poor knife juggler who comes by the market sometimes." That, at least, was true.

"I believe I saw him, the other day," Nodoka mused. "All I could think was, 'oh no, I'm contagious.'"

Kasumi giggled politely, while beside her Nabiki let out a sharp bark of laughter.

“In any case, I'll try to keep them contained in the kitchen from now on, at least,” Nodoka said, making her way back to the kitchen to do just that.

See that you do, Kasumi did not say, and don't ruin my knives. Instead, she placidly sipped her tea.

————

Dinner is coming along quite nicely, noted Nodoka as she returned, pausing to watch Ranma mind the grill. The mother-daughter duo had made a nice, traditional meal of cheeseburgers and baked beans, along with daikon radish fries—apparently something the younger girl had experience making on the road—and, of course, homemade ice cream.

For a mother-daughter bonding time, it went well, aside from her recent clumsiness with the knife—up until now, Ranma had been quick to take on any chopping. She was sure it was intentional— but what harm could slicing one tomato do? she'd thought.

The only damper on her spirits was that she'd realized that Ranma was very unwilling to discuss anything related to her original gender; something she would have to broach at a better time, when she could help sort through the trauma (and when there were no nearby Tendos to eavesdrop). For now, dinner was ready, and it was time to call everyone together.

————

"Ranma, could you fetch Akane from the dojo?" her mother requested.

"Sure thing, Ma." Plating the last burger, she took a wistful glance towards the freezer.

Ice cream looked delicious , dammit. And it especially wasn't fair that she couldn't eat it when she put in the work to make it.

But… she was still a guy (despite appearances). And guys weren't allowed to eat ice cream, or enjoy clothes shopping, or read romance novels, or do goddamn anything nice .

Not for the first time, Ranma wished that she was a girl.

But she wasn't. So she sighed and did her best to put it from her mind as she went to find her sister.

————

In the midst of her laughter and surprise at the preceding display of clumsiness, the gears within Nabiki’s mind were turning. And said display was giving her some food for thought.

If her theory was right, then Nodoka's 'clumsiness' with knives was all an act. A well performed one, to be sure, but still just an elaborate ruse to cover for her attempts to enforce the contract.

But if that was the case, she mused, what was Nodoka's intention in targeting Kasumi? Had she done something wrong? Surely not—Kasumi was unimpeachable, especially in matters of traditional womanhood.

…Was it possible that she really was that clumsy? That she hadn't been enforcing the contract—maybe even that there was no seppuku contract at all?

No, surely not. After all, Ranma was still acting exaggeratedly girly around her mother—that much was undeniable. What reason would she have to do that, if there was no contract?

…Something about that question niggled at her brain… like there was a reason that she should be able to think of….

Before she could place it, however, her thoughts were again interrupted, this time by the small matter of Kuno crashing through the roof.

————

Having torn through the roof, the table he had gracefully landed on served as the perfect stand for Kuno to declare his intent. It didn’t matter that he had actually landed on top of the refrigerator; it didn’t matter that he had to scramble to get to the dining room; and it certainly didn’t matter that he’d been initially waylaid by enjoying a stray tub of butterscotch ice cream. His inner theater kid—his dramatic instincts , dammit Nabiki—told him that this was what he must do, especially in times like these.

"My fair lioness, Tendou Ranma!!" he proclaimed at the top of his lungs—using the traditional name ordering, of course. "I hereby challenge thee to a duel of might and wit, with no holds barred!"

Pausing for his opponent's response, he was quite taken aback for it to be, "Wait, ya can just… eat ice cream?!"

"...Yes?" he returned, still brandishing the fork he had used for the task at arm's length.

"Just like that?!" Ranma cried, fury in her voice. "I was always told men couldn't have any!!"

Kuno blinked, nonplussed, dropping the fork in his surprise. "It is just… food. Aye, it is perhaps a tad feminine, but an honorable warrior ought not be deterred by such labels–"

Kuno was again taken by surprise as Ranma suddenly screamed and charged at him, but he recovered admirably quickly, if he did say so himself—she only landed three blows before he had his bokken out to block!

“You are eager, I see! Very well, I shall take you on at full force!”

————

It did not take long for the scene to devolve into the usual brand of chaos native to Furinkan-cho. Wood clashed with flesh clashed with metal, as Ranma and the Neighborhood Samurai fought with each other. 

Well, it looked more like the Neighborhood Samurai was getting his ass beat handily by Ranma. At least Nabiki wouldn't need to intervene any further.

And a good thing, because she suddenly had a lot to think about. Claiming a migraine coming on, she retreated to her bedroom, slammed her back against the door, and let her feelings out.

God dammit God dammit goddammit!! How could I have been so wrong?!

This wasn't right! Nabiki prided herself on observing people and figuring them out, and she did not make mistakes! Especially not ones like this! 

Yes , Nodoka was traditional and concerned with honor, and yes , Ranma was acting super extra girly and a little scared around her, but it wasn't because of some insane seppuku contract!

She was just trans!!

Nabiki couldn't believe it took goddamn ice cream jealousy for her to figure it out. Her best friend was trans! She knew what dysphoria looked like! And yet, somehow, she hadn't clocked her own sister in five months .

And it's not like there weren't clues; in retrospect, there were clues all along. The lack of feminine clothes—heck, Nabiki practically had to force her to buy her first bra. Her paranoia around the bath, and the way she always seemed more tense afterwards . The sheer shock when Kasumi gave her her old nightdress. The way she acted like her disguise for Shampoo was physically painful . Her (reported) closing up when changing for gym. Not to mention her love for martial arts and complete lack of experience in anything girly.

…Although, that last one would also imply that Akane was trans, so maybe it didn't count.

Still, though! There were more than enough clues! And for Nabiki to not have put them together was…

Well. Downright shameful.

She could only imagine how many opportunities she'd missed.

Opportunities to help, that is! Definitely that and no other kind. She's your sister, remember? You don't cheat your sisters!

Anymore.

So deep was Nabiki in her thoughts, it wasn't until she felt the stinging warmth of reheated espresso in her veins that she realized she was holding only cold shards of what used to be her favorite coffee mug. Even then, it barely registered, and she simply drifted her way to the kitchen for a paper towel.

Only when she half tripped over the remains of a shopping basket did she think to actually look at her surroundings. But when she did, she was greeted by the sight of the dining table on fire, with Kasumi over Ranma with a first aid kit and a bag of ice, Akane almost casually putting out the fire with an extinguisher from the kitchen, and Nodoka holding Kuno at swordpoint with his own bokken.

“What the fuck happened here?”