Chapter Text
The summer was an accumulation of sensations that in my relatively short life I didn't think to pass, from joy to the most tragic, from security to the unexpected.
From trust to insecurity. From not thinking of winning anything in the season to obtaining the King's Cup from the hand of the one who until now...
He was the greatest legend of the club. From taking its renewal for granted to the most tragic farewell that a legend could receive
Without an ovation, without any audience, without... Without nothing more than a small audience, where more than half were journalists.
I was not present because they had given me a short additional vacation for the Eurocup and the Olympics, I was certainly in bed with pain in all body. I was so tired and I had lost more than 3 kilograms in all this time playing.
But I saw it on TV, like many millions of others in the world. The causes... I had no idea, but the club's situation had everyone on the brink of uncertainty...
Until I had not renewed my contract like many others and my future was still uncertain. In the end, Lio went to the dirty PSG club. There is no resentment with him, it was one of the few clubs that could receive him and deal with his wages. Also he had friends in Paris so he hasn't to meet new players... Lio was reserved with people.
The little time we shared, no more than one season, was full of learning and seeing the best football that my eyes could see. At least. I want to not face with him in the future.
Although some time had passed, he still thought a lot about everything that had happened. In addition to not doing preseason. I felt restless and anxious.
It was the first day in training, at least mine. The climate in the sports city was... insipid and only sheltered insecurities or that's what I thought.
The captains lay on one side with the coach. Frenkie and Ters were talking separately with the new Dutchman. Ousmane with Griezmann on the other side. The greeting was short but respectful. Ansu seemed the most happy with my return as well as congratulating me on my role in the team. At least he showed some joy on his face, not like everyone else.As I said the climate was insipid and not only for me it seems.
Apart from them, many familiar faces, some not so much. I knew about Eric, the Kun and Memphis. I already knew something about them, at least footballingly speaking, from the matches I had seen in the premier league and "ligue one". But the other two... I didn't remember them at all.
Were they from the "masia"?
Or they had signed up and I had no idea... My doubt ended when Eric mentioned that he had known them for a few years. In addition to my null knowledge about both, they did not separate.
They seemed to have a friendship because of the familiarity that emanated.
The first impression... of the tallest, was...
How to say... Standard, normal?
He was or at least in my view sociable, enthusiastic, participative and he asked the coaching staff for advice anytime he can... like any young player. The greeting was also a simple handshake. Now that he was close, physically... He looked a bit like Collado, only the brown hair I thought.
The youngest of them looked like his younger brother, much younger, I couldn't believe that he was promoted to the first team at such a young age... Even more than I did a year ago even much people called me the "new Iniesta" prematurely already in Las Palmas .The greeting as with Nico, short without further conversation, however the handshake would say that I had been annoyed by the force he imprinted.
The problem came when they formed us into teams after the "rondo" we used to do.Honestly, watching him train, I felt an annoyance in my thoughts, I couldn't define it but it got more accentuated when he took the ball away with a tackle. The fall hurt, not physically.
I was relatively tired from the consecutive games with the national team... I felt humiliated for a moment. And more when he took the ball off again shortly after.
Was I so rusty or what was wrong?I was very bad or he was very good? was this aggressiveness normal?
I saw at times how the coach looked at him and talk with his second in command.
I feel fear?
He... Plays right in my position.
Two months ago I felt secure in the team but all this climate of insecurity formed since Lio's departure made me feel bad and now for first time annoyed with one of my teammates.
After training, I went to the parking lot where my brother was waiting... Get in the car. I rolled up the windshield and rested my face on my elbow.
- Everything's fine? asked my brother.
- Yes, as always... Everything good.
He nodded but I was sure he knew something was wrong with me, He didn't try to find out more and I thanked him for letting me to sink into my thoughts.
....
The first game for "la liga" will be in a few days, at that moment I will know if all my insecurities were real or just a product of my imagination... In this moment I really wanted to be in the past... When I felt calm with the team and without knowledge of all the financial problems of the club. In addition, Lio was no longer here... providing security and leadership. Even if that was more than just an illusion.
Now everything seemed like a coin toss. Glory or failure, fifty/fifty.
- Shit...
"don't think about it,Pedri, at least not for now" I told myself