Chapter Text
“But I learned something” Minori said, her voice sounded so tiny.
Ami briefly eyed the curled-up figure beside her. Her face was red and stained with tears, she was hugging herself so close she could only just about make out her facial expression. She would’ve never believed that this girl and the happy jock everyone saw running around the softball field were the same person. “What?”
“If you run through the halls and trip, you get a nosebleed. If you go through life and trip, you cry.” Minori reflected solemnly. Her words sounded smart and grown up, like something you’d print on a t-shirt or read in a book, but her voice betrayed her words. She sounded so...weak and shaky and small like she didn’t really know anything.
She didn’t know anything, and she was just putting on an act again, an act so convincing that she became it.
“Oh, give me a break” Ami sighed. “You’re way too young to be waxing philosophical.”
Minori quietly hid her face in her knees.
“Maybe in ten, twenty, sixty years. But now, you’re way too young...”
It’s okay to not know, you don’t have to be grown up all the time. Ami thought to herself.
“We both are...”
Minori felt the hot tears burning in her eyes again as Ami went quiet. Minori had always seen Ami as far more mature than the rest of them. Ami, her last beacon of hope after everything else failed. Minori lifted her head and looked at this so-called ‘last hope’, looked at the awkward expression on Ami’s face, her slightly furrowed eyebrows and tightly strung mouth staring up into space as if searching for what to say next. There was a quiet tapping sound coming from Ami’s slender finger nervously drumming against the floorboards beneath them, a rustle from her clothes as she leaned back on her hands trying to get comfortable.
Minori still thought that Ami was beautiful, but Ami was just a person. A person who’d lived just as long as she had. Minori gripped onto herself as a wave of guilt and pain washed over her. She still wanted to lean on Ami, cry to her, spill her feelings out because she thought Ami might understand better than she ever could. But it wasn’t fair. It was unfair to burden Ami with something that she couldn’t and didn’t need to fix.
“Wow...sorry.” Minori let out, exasperated. Ami looked at her curiously. Minori uncurled herself and wiped the tears off her face. “It’s getting pretty late, huh? I should get going.” Minori said even though her limbs felt like they were made of jelly.
“Uh- huh? Wait, are you sure? It’s really cold out and your house is pretty far away.” Ami blurted out, surprised by Minori’s sudden need to go.
“Thanks, but I’m sure. Don’t worry, I can make it, you’re looking at the fastest runner on the softball team here.” Minori stood up and stretched, talking as if she hadn’t just been crying a moment ago. She was wearing that fake smile and overly cheery persona that she wore whenever she wanted to hide something. It made Ami feel sick to her stomach.
“Wait, you’re really just going to-”
The redhead grabbed her jacket and scarf and began putting her shoes on. “I’m sorry for bothering you, Ami. Thank you for having me. Seriously, thank you.” Minori smiled sadly and honestly. The look in her eyes was so lost and drained. It scared Ami.
Minori stumbled slightly as she stood up, she held her coat and scarf in one arm, while the other arm urgently reached for the door handle.
As if Minori had hit some unknown reflex she didn’t know she had, Ami reached out and forcefully grasped Minori’s outstretched hand. “Minori wait!”
She looked down at the shaking hand she was holding in surprise of herself. Not long ago she’d wanted Minori to leave, what changed? She’d have to answer that later because she heard another sob.
“Minori” Ami called out, so softly it was barely audible.
“I- I need to leave Ami...” Minori whimpered, her face still pointed at the door. “I can’t- I can’t let myself rely on you.”
Ami’s grip on Minori’s hand weakened slightly. Those words hurt a little. “What are you talking about?”
Minori sniffled “It’s not fair- it's not fair to you. You’re just as y-young as I am. I’m- I-I shouldn’t have! It’s unfair for me to push my...my feelings onto you to fix, I know that’s not- fuck. I’m sorry!” She stumbled through each wobbly, crackly word, it was difficult to understand but somehow Ami still heard her.
Ami’s heart hurt, it ached so bad that she almost felt like crying. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt like that. “But didn’t you hear what I said? ‘You’re way too young to be...’” Ami exhaled and put her hands on Minori’s shoulders. “You don’t have to act so grown up all the time. It’s okay for you to just...” Ami’s voice caught on her words. Just like Minori she had to struggle through the forest of facades and be truly honest for once. “I never said I was going to fix your problems or whatever you think. I can’t do that but...if you want to you can just stay here for the night. Sit down here or cry or talk or anything and I’ll be...I’ll be here.” Ami let go of Minori and sighed at herself, breathing through the matted feelings in her stomach.
Minori stared at Ami with tear-filled eyes. Her breath shook before her face broke out into a wobbly smile; those tears streamed down her cheeks once again, she batted at them as she bittersweetly chuckled between her choked sobs and she showed it all to Ami.
All the strength in Minori’s body tumbled out in an instant and she fell to the ground, onto the step she’d sat on. It freaked Ami out a little and she checked if she was okay as she plopped down next to Minori.
The two of them resumed their positions from before but just a bit closer together this time.
“Sorry” Minori mumbled curling up again.
“You don’t need to apologize.”
“...are you sure it’s okay-”
“It’s okay.”
A draft of cold air drifted in through the hallway causing Ami to shiver slightly. She saw Minori was trembling slightly, either from the cold or from crying or maybe both. Ami felt her cheeks heat up and she rubbed at them with her cold hands, she couldn’t believe this night. Ami scooched over, she tentatively put her arm around Minori’s shoulders.
Minori flinched, not expecting such a display from Ami. “Awe Amin~” she giggled.
“Shut up.” Ami grumbled in embarrassment.
Minori hesitantly leaned into the affection. “Thank you” she whispered. “Thank you for everything.”
They sat there together for some time. Mostly in comfortable silence, sometimes Minori would start crying again, sometimes one of them would say something, but for the most part they were okay to just sit together, not knowing.
Ami really couldn’t believe this night. Not just because Minori was finally being honest with her but...Ami herself felt like she was displaying so much of herself tonight.
“Hey, we should probably move we’ve been sitting here for way too long.” Ami said, she was starting to get a cramp from sitting in the same position for so long. But Minori didn’t respond. “Minori?” Ami leaned to look at her. “Hello?” Minori’s eyes were half open and she was leaning almost entirely on her now.
“Hmm?” Minori hummed idly.
“Are you seriously falling asleep?” Ami asked, raising an eyebrow.
“No, no, I'm not” Minori responded before yawning and closing her eyes again.
“God, at least get to bed first.” Ami shook Minori slightly and pulled her to stand up. “Come on, I can’t carry you.”
She helped the tired girl to her bed where she collapsed like a ragdoll. Ami let Minori curl up in her bed, she even put a blanket over her, she had no idea why she was doing all this. Minori just looked so helpless.
Minori looked up at Ami, smiling with a half-asleep gaze.
“What?” Ami chuckled “Why are you looking at me like that? Just go to bed, okay?” Ami was about to walk away.
“Amin” Minori mumbled.
“Yeah?”
“I really like you.”
Ba-dum.
“W-what?”
But Minori was asleep.
With a boom, Ami’s heart set into motion and began beating uncontrollably. Her cheeks flushed. She looked down at the ground and rushed out of the room, trying not to slam the door behind her. She pushed her back against the door and tried to calm herself down because there was no reason for her to react like this.
I don’t know what that meant. That could’ve meant anything. It doesn’t matter. Besides plenty of people have said that to me before.
But none of those people had ever seen Ami’s true self. None of them knew her the way Minori did. Minori knew her and she- she likes me?! Fuck.
Ami stomped away from her bedroom where Minori was and into the kitchen. She face-palmed herself with both hands.
She just got over Ryuji, she couldn’t possibly be getting feelings for someone else already. Ami grabbed a bag of chips from the cupboard in annoyance and began eating her feelings away.
Why did it have to be Minori? Minori already had enough on her plate, she had to get over Ryuji and Taiga at once she didn’t need this. Ami got herself a blanket and a pillow and made her way to the couch with her packet of chips.
She would just have to ignore any feelings she had for now, it was not a good time. Ami turned on the TV to distract herself.
Ami didn’t get much sleep that night.