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In the midst of late nights that quickly approach day, and scattered papers and books thrown across the floor. There had always been silence.
It had been the one thing that kept him company in his moments of solitude. The comforting peace to balance out the frustrations. Silence also served as a reminder of where he stood in the present. Through silence he can hear glass surfaces meeting, bubbles popping and the sound of liquid swirling in a little pot.
It’s not an uncommon trait shared between him and his fellow alchemists. Even between the other members of his guild. Silence had always been what stood beside them in the journey to perfect their crafts.
When all the momentary noise fades. When the swinging of weapons draws to a halt, and the chatter ends. There was always silence.
He worked better in silence.
Yet there were some nights that even silence couldn’t grant him what he needed. Where the scatter papers are crumpled into balls strewn across his desk. Rolling off the edges and out the knocked over trash bin. Where the books thrown across the floor were a result of frustration rather than carelessness, a violent choice he would come to reflect upon later.
Such a night like this, where even silence could not balance out the frustrations that had built in the great Magni Dezmond’s mind.
When he had stepped into his workspace, reaching to close the windows as he began his work, the sun had only begun to set. Moments ago, when he looked through the glass once more, it seemed like it would only be a few hours before the sun would greet him again. The bright light would seep in through the windows and highlight the mess he has made of his space.
And when the sun would greet him again, he would have had nothing done. With no rest to accompany that too.
His mind had grown exhausted from trying to think, and body weary from pacing for hours. Though he isn’t sure what prompted him to rest himself on the carpet instead, knowing very well he was unable to rest even if he wanted to. Eventually, one of his guildmates would contact him and probably berate him for not resting
And he’d laugh, biting back the desire to call them out for doing the same at some point. All while exhaustion weighs on his shoulders.
But until then, he was here.
The carpet isn’t the most comfortable surface, but it’ll do. He at least has the little comfort that silence can offer him, and the cold breeze of the late night and early day too.
Wait.
He doesn’t remember ever opening the windows again.
Alarm bells ring in his head, and he sits up quickly. Maybe too much so. The rapid movement and the exhaustion in his body prompted a throb of pain through his head, making him groan in pain. A palm pressed against his forehead as he drew out a long, exhausted sigh.
The cold breeze greets him again, and he remembers why he got up in the first place. He turns to the windows. Unsurprisingly, though a little unnervingly, the windows were wide open, drawing in a cold breeze that brushes against his face.
Dez stares at the open window, waiting patiently and warily for something to appear. His eyes briefly scatter across his room, looking for the closest potion that he can use against whatever unexpected enemy could be clinging onto the walls outside.
And then there was a sound.
The first few seconds of it was enough for him to jump forward, reaching for the potion sitting on his desk, just a few feet away.
But the sound continued, and he found himself pausing halfway. His hand frozen midair while his mind blanks. All the alarm bells silencing, and his alertness dropping.
Whatever was outside his window, whatever opened his window. Whoever .
Was singing.
Dez’s fingers curl back into his palm, his hand drawing closer to his chest as the melody goes through his ears. The tension in his body visibly fades as his shoulders slump, relaxed. He feels peace, absolute peace. It was a peace unique to the one the silence granted him, and yet effective all the same.
A smile. A small, stupid smile that he can feel, stretches across his face. On any other day, had he been more conscious of that smile with the addition of his dishevelled and exhausted appearance, he’d be trying to fix himself as quickly as he can. But at that moment, he didn’t really care.
He knows that singing voice anywhere.
“Rio-senpai?”
It’s a little embarrassing how clear it was that he hasn’t used his voice in hours. But if it was Rio, he can afford to not fear any judgement. Not like he expects it, no. Not from Rio.
Dez continues to stare at the open window, waiting patiently for anything to happen. The cold breeze suddenly halts, no longer touching his face. Yet around the edges of the open window, his curtains were still dancing gently in the air, as if a gentle breeze was still making its way into his workspace.
A silhouette fades into existence from nothing, sat on the window sill. Long purple hair flowing in the gentle breeze, and the blue light of a tiny flame decorating on the window’s frame and reflecting on the glass. Soft purples stare back at him, highlighted by a pale face glowing with a hue of pink flush.
And a smile, a tiny, curious smile stretching soft lips.
“Rio-senpai…” It comes out of Dez’s lips like a soft exhale. Relief.
The ghost tilts his head to the side, the soft smile growing wide as a greeting. Dez can’t stop the endeared chuckle that slips from his lips as he watches the other. Rio, sat on his window sill, swinging his legs innocently, the back of his shoes bouncing on and off the wall under where he sits.
“Hi!” The cheeriness in Rio’s voice almost made Dez forget that it was an absolute horrendous hour in the morning to even be awake. Dez doesn’t stand from his spot, but the thought crosses his mind with the desire to be closer to the other.
But before he could, Rio pushes himself off the ledge with his palms. Floating across the room and around his desk gracefully. Eyes curiously panning across the room, taking in the details. There’s a bounce to how the ghost floats. Something that, from the few encounters they’ve had, was a telltale sign of his happiness.
Rio was happy.
To be here.
Dez isn’t sure why he feels so giddy by that thought.
“Why are you still awake?”
“I uh-” He shakes his head, face growing hot in embarrassment at how the other managed to catch him off guard like that. Rio floats closer to him, before spinning a little midair and slowly falling back onto the ground. Landing to sit next to him on the carpet. “I- I can’t sleep. I ummm. I.”
Awkwardly, Dez gestures to the mess that was his workspace. Earlier embarrassment grows as he finds himself more awake and aware than ever. Rio is looking and sitting in the middle of his mess. All with the sweetest smile on his pale face.
“Rough work day.” The alchemist laughs at himself in an attempt to brush away his own embarrassment. He can have the relief that Rio genuinely looks like he doesn’t mind the mess. “What about you? Why are you still awake?”
“I can’t sleep too.” Rio’s smile stretches into a tiny grin. “The others are asleep, like babies. I wanted to look for someone who was awake.”
“How’d you know I would be awake, Rio-senpai?”
“I didn’t.” Rio laughs, his legs draw closer to his chest and he leans his chin on his arms, crossed over his knees.
Dez finds himself taking in every detail of the other. From the flicker of the flame floating above his head, to the way his fingers tap against his arms. There were all these little details about his senior that he finds himself hypnotised by. Unsure of why exactly, but not particularly bothered.
“When I saw Fuma, Uyu and Gamma were asleep, I just went to the first person I could think of.” Rio’s eyes pan to him, and Dez’s breath hitches while his cheeks grow hot. “So now I’m here.”
“O-oh.”
“Are you alright?” There was genuine concern in Rio’s voice as he said it. “It’s not everyday I see a great alchemist such as yourself, laying on the carpet and staring into the ceiling.”
“I’m fi-ine!”
Rio’s brows furrow at that reply, and Dez doesn’t blame him. Not with how his voice cracked in the middle of it. He wonders if it's possible for his face to grow even hotter than it already was, but never in his life has he been reduced to such an easily embarrassed mess.
“That’s not very convincing.” Least he can do is be happy that there was some amusement in the other’s voice. “You’re not good at lying, Dez”
“I- I uh, yeah.” Not to you, it seems. “I-I did say I had a rough work day, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
The alchemist sighs, drawing patterns into the carpet as he tries to figure out how to explain his dilemma. He eyes his desk, the disappointment of today’s failures staring back at him in the form of unfinished work, empty and emptied bottles. The hours spent in the workspace, and the time sacrificed, leading to nothing.
Not a new experience. But the disappointment is all the same.
“I’m tired.” Dez says, softly. “Exhausted, actually. But I can’t sleep.”
In the beat of silence that follows, Dez finds himself unable to face the other man sitting beside him again. Still focused on the messy desk and abandoned work. Even if he did turn around, what would he see other than more mess?
The only good thing from the past hours to have happened, sat beside him. His beloved senior, a witness to the tragedy of what a bad day looked like for the great Magni Dezmond.
“So I just, am here.”
He feels something press against his shoulder. A hand, smaller than those of his own. His eyes pan to it, taking in the sight of the pale slender fingers. Slowly, he turns to the other, his eyes tracing from the other’s hand, down to his arm and shoulder. Until he’s finally staring into the face of the other next to him.
Those lovely eyes staring back at him with so much care.
His heart beats, loud in his ears.
“I could have guessed.” It’s said so softly, sweetly. The tone, seeming so perfect coming from the lips of someone like Rio. “You look so tired. Please rest.”
“I wish I could.”
“I could help you.” The ghost offers him a sweet smile as it's said, “If you’re okay with that. I’m not sure if it’ll work but…I could try something? Is there anything I could do to help you sleep?”
“Rio-senpai, you don’t need to do-”
“I want to! It’s alright!”
Dez can’t find it in himself to argue further, the other looked determined. Hiding his embarrassed face, he throws himself back onto the carpet, managing to avoid bumping his head too harshly on the surface. Rio is staring down at him, still waiting for an answer.
Not wanting to leave the other hanging, he goes through possible ideas. Trying to avoid looking up at the other as much as possible.
A cold breeze touches his cheek, and his attention turns to that open window again. The thing that had turned his exhausted night into a spiral of embarrassment that he can barely comprehend. The lack of sleep causes his head to throb.
He’s so tired.
“Can you sing for me?”
Dez still can’t put it in himself to look at the ghost.
“I can do that.”
So he closes his eyes. Muttering a tiny ‘thank you’ as he awaits the other to start. Praying that this would be enough to bring him into slumber so he can sleep off the concoction of feelings in his chest. That, and so he can actually rest.
But instead, he hears shifting next to him on the carpet. Hands press against the side of his head, and Rio repositions his head onto something soft. His eyes flutter open, ready to give his thanks thinking the other had slid a pillow under his head.
To his surprise, the first thing he sees is Rio’s face right above him, staring down at him with a smile as soft as the expression deep in lavender eyes. It didn’t take long for him to put two and two together; He was laying his head in the other’s lap.
Dez’s heart beats in his ears, his face warm. But he can’t look away.
Not until Rio chuckles above him. Not until Rio draws a hand over his eyes, obstructing his view from the ghost. His eyelid flutters shut in the darkness, and the weight above them leaves.
There’s a beat of silence. A moment for Dez to calm himself, and allow himself the sweet comfort. Ignoring the embarrassment and placing it as a matter for another day, somewhere in the back of his head.
The ghost’s gentle voice reaches his ears, a tune that he’s unsure if he’s heard before. Soft and sweet. A lullaby that fills his mind with images of stars shooting in a sky, darkness painted with soft hues of colored light. Reds, blues and greens and all sorts of colours.
There's a gentle caress on his forehead.
He finds himself imagining two shades of purple mingling in that dark sky. Like a slow dance between two people, connected in ways that go beyond physical.
Briefly, before he’s welcomed into the arms of slumber, he wonders if he could be one of those people.
Briefly, before he’s welcome into the arms of slumber, he wonders if the person lulling him to rest would be the other.
In the middle of all his wonders, there was one thing he was sure of.
This was so much better than the silence.
✦-✧-✦-✧-✦
“Fuck.”
When he wakes up hours later, his senior is no longer in the room and a soft pillow was placed under his head. It’s almost late afternoon, and he had never felt as rested as he did at that moment.
But the memories of hours prior resurface the minute he wonders where Rio had gone.
Running his fingers through his hair, before burying his face in his hands. He groans at the realisation that had dawned upon him. His face was burning hot, and he was sure anyone that would walk in at that moment would not miss how red he looked.
Question after question comes. Reflecting on every thought that had crossed his mind in that moment alone with his senior. No matter which way he’d try to connect every little detail, it all led to that same conclusion. That…
“I can’t believe I thought that way about Rio-senpai…I-”
Oh.
Oh.
“Shit.”
And once more, he was greeted by silence.