Chapter Text
Charlie liked to consider himself a normal bank teller. He had two cats who would wake him up every morning with incessant meowing. He would greet them sleepily, yawning and stretching his arms as they rubbed their heads up against his feet. “I'm coming,” he would mumble, trying to force himself out of bed. “Give me a minute.”
His minute usually ended with one of the two cats biting him, and he would fuss all the while as he prepared their meals.
Once his little monsters were satisfied, Charlie would make himself some breakfast. He tried to make it well-rounded and healthy, though sometimes he would cave and pull out some cereal or just settle with coffee.
He was close enough to walk to work, sidestepping all of the other sleepy businessmen and women in their suits with their briefcases, determined to speak with no one and to only focus on work.
Charlie liked to think he was the same way.
He would arrive and settle down behind the counter, several of his coworkers already seated in their positions, as well. It was all normal, all very well, just as how everyone else in the world lived their lives—
“I'm going to bet all of the money in my wallet that Lune Noire comes back today.”
“How about all of the money in my savings account?”
“You guys can take my entire family, while you're at it. It's a full moon — of course he'll be back.”
And then all eyes turned to Charlie.
He sighed loudly before glancing at his calendar. Circled was the date, a small moon drawn beside it, and he had written out, “TEN AM: LUNE NOIRE WILL ROB THE BANK.”
“Even Charlie seems to know,” one of his coworkers exclaimed. “He's calculated all of the days Lune Noire is coming!”
“It's not hard,” a lady snorted as she walked up behind Charlie. “He comes at the exact same time every single month. As long as we know when the full moon is, we know when we'll be robbed.” She sipped her coffee and sighed. “At least Solar and Power Surge always get it back to us the next day.”
Charlie never really forgot that his place of work was always the subject of the news each month — or, rather, it was at one point in time, when the robberies were new and unpredictable.
And then it became monotonous. Lune Noire would arrive one day per month, on the full moon, and take whatever Charlie had in his till or near his general person. Originally, Lune Noire would also acquire money stored away in safes or in back rooms, but for the past few months, it had been whatever change Charlie had around him; maybe close to 15,000 pounds. A large sum, yes, but it was always returned by two superheroes the very next day.
(Charlie had asked once, “How the hell do you two always bring this back to me so quickly?”
Solar, the superhero in the dark pink-coloured mask with gold details, hummed lightly as Charlie counted out the exact amount of money. “He contacted the police and informed them he would hand it over to me only if he had my phone number. So now some crazy supervillain has my phone number and always texts me where he's dropping off the money.”
“He steals it and then drops it off a few hours later?” Charlie asked.
“Yeah. Probably the most useless job I have these days. And, on top of that, he texts me pictures of dogs.”
Charlie somehow found Lune Noire endearing.)
He prepared the money, then, for Lune Noire to take, setting it aside for easy access. He didn't want the robbery to take up too much of his time. He had other clients to see; clients who wouldn't rob him.
His coworkers kept glancing at the clock throughout the first hour of opening, counting down the minutes. They usually pretended to be scared, proclaiming Charlie as their official “villain ambassador.” It was pathetic. It was silly.
The police stopped responding when they realised everything was normal in the end, and Lune Noire was impossible to catch, anyway. So Charlie had only himself to rely on.
Ten o'clock. Right on the dot, a heavy bout of mist exploded in the front entrance. Customers waiting in line hurried off to the sides of the large building as a villain, dressed all in black, strode forward.
Charlie appreciated good fashion. Even if there wasn't a single bit of colour in Lune Noire's evil attire, he still made it look good. His pants were tight and his shoes were polished. His top was a black mesh with one sleeveless arm, along with a harness that went over his pecs and around his neck. He also had black leather gloves attached to leather sleeves that connected to each other on his back. He wore a mask, just like every other superhero and supervillain, hiding his identity to the world. It was a very interesting villain uniform; not as complex as the other villains that Charlie would see on the news, and yet it was intriguing (and incredibly distracting — something he would never admit out loud).
Piercing brown eyes stared at him from behind the mask, and lips turned up in a small, smug smile.
“Charlie Spring, we meet again,” Lune Noire greeted.
All of Charlie's coworkers had taken the chance to hide. Some of them were still on the phone with clients as they huddled under the counter, seemingly unconcerned with the robbery.
“Doesn't this ever get tiring, Lune Noire?” Charlie questioned as he gathered the money. “It's rather boring.”
“It's a robbery, though.”
“Solar always brings the money back.” Charlie passed over the bundle of cash he had set aside. “And I counted — 15,000 pounds.”
“Precise!” Lune Noire commented as a gloved hand came out to take the funds.
Charlie held it back, however, jerking his hand away and narrowing his eyes. “I always count,” he warned, “and if it's not the exact amount, I will call the police on you.”
“Oh?” Lune Noire grinned and leaned in, splaying himself out lazily on the counter. “Wouldn't that be interesting, Charlie Spring? A wild police chase? Mm, but you know they can never find me.”
“What about Solar, then? She's become a regular customer around here. I'm certain that she'd be able to find you if she tried.”
Lune Noire sighed, a little dramatically — then again, he was a supervillain. “Solar's been a stick in the mud recently. She got herself this cute girlfriend, and now she says she has less time to play cat and mouse with me. So I usually just have to tell her where I am. Either that, or she sticks Lightning Rod on my arse.”
“Power Surge?”
“Solar tells me Power Surge is just a phase, and that he'll adopt a name like Circuit Breaker soon enough.” Lune Noire gave a reach for the money, which Charlie still held away. “Oh, come on, Charlie Spring! You're not being fair!”
“I just want to know how much longer this will continue,” Charlie said. “I have my own life to be concerned about. If I pass over 15,000 pounds to you every single month, it really starts to wear me down.”
“How so?”
“It just… it does! I stress over it often.”
Lune Noire pursed his lips before he moved his hand, this time to Charlie's face. He brushed a finger over Charlie's cheek, the fabric from his glove soft against skin, then gave a slight tsk. “Stress causes wrinkles.”
“Gee, great. Now I'll become wrinkled before I hit the age of thirty.”
“A-ha! I knew you weren't that old just yet! How old are you, then? Twenty-five? Twenty-three?”
“None of your business.” Charlie grabbed Lune Noire's hand, pulling it away from his cheek, and stuffed the money into his open palm. “Stop fondling me and just take it, alright?”
Lune Noire giggled, his tone deep but airy, voice cracking as he responded, “Fondling you is the best part of my entire month.”
Charlie wished he was the one with the mask, if only to hide his blush from Lune Noire's watchful gaze. “I-I expect it to all be back by the end of today,” Charlie warned. “15,000 pounds.”
“15,000 pounds,” Lune Noire confirmed. “Will you work on the full moon next month, too?” Charlie glared at him, and Lune Noire grinned sheepishly. “You could request the day off if you hated this so much,” the villain commented in leisure. “But I know you won't, because I think you secretly look forward to all of my visits. I think that you think that I'm hot.”
“Please leave.” Because it was definitely true. Charlie was never drawn to the bad guys, but damn him, Lune Noire was extremely attractive for an evil supervillain.
“I'm not so secret in my desires,” Lune Noire explained, “and one day I hope I can convince you to kiss me. Right here. Right on the lips. Just one little kiss—”
“I have Solar on speed dial.”
“You do know how to shut a guy down. What a shame.” Lune Noire pulled back from the desk, the same, devious smirk taking over his expression. “One day, though, I have hope that I'll gain your love and affection. I'll bide my time. And while I do that, you'll continue taking other days off in order to work on this one, particular day. Oh, but don't you worry, Charlie Spring — I'll always be here for you, okay?”
He didn't wait for a response. He left again, shrouded in mist and mystery, and Charlie released a large sigh as his coworkers all resumed their positions and the customers all scurried back in line.
Charlie was normal, save for the giant, stupid crush he had on Lune Noire, resident supervillain.