Work Text:
Raine Whispers was having a (semi) normal day in the boiling isles when hooty dragged in Ben Shapiro by the neck.
"LOOK WHAT I BROUGHT HOME FOR DINNER, HOOT" Hooty said, unceremoniously depositing a very greasy looking human onto the carpet, "He tried to run away like Eda's vegetables, but that didn't stop me!"
Raine questioned if they were about to have an aneurysm.
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Maybe they should take a nap. Why is Hooty bringing in greasy humans? Why is Raine the only one home right now? Where is Eda? Where is Luz? Where’s King?
“Hooty… I don’t think we should eat that. Luz said cannibalism is very frowned upon in the human realm.”
“Aw. Hoot.” Hooty drops the human.
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"Hey whats up guys im Ben shapiro."
"Actually, maybe I agree with you hooty. He looks very scrumdiddlyumptious."
Hooty stabs him through the heart and he dies.
Hooty throws him in a comically large pot with vegetables and salt and pepper.
"Wow what a yummy meal,' Raine says.
"Ben shapiro is no more."
The end....?