Work Text:
If there is a way to meet with anyone he wants to, even the one he never heard its name before, Tang Gunak really needs to know how right now.
Some time already passed after Tang Family formed a new friendship with Mount Hua. After witnessing what Chung Myung has done for his family, Tang Gunak feels this is the best decision he ever made in his life. As a friend, he made promised to himself that he will do anything he can to help his first friend in time of need, no matter what it is. Personally, he thought there weren't many things he couldn’t do. But maybe he needs to reconsider taking back that claim.
Inside a gazebo reserved for only him, and his little friend, Tang Gunak sit across Chung Myung whose already emptied enough bottles to knock out five people in one go. As he watches the youth sink his head deeper into his arms, Tang Gunak brushes his thumb against the rim of his own cup, thinking. Thanks to his resistance to poison, this much alcohol is barely enough to haze his mind. But he also knows Chung Myung isn’t usually the type who loses to alcohol this fast.
Now the one called Mount Hua Divine Dragon is wasted helplessly on the table. Mind completely gone elsewhere. Should he be happy that the youth showed enough trust on him till he didn’t mind showing his weak side?
That’s not the reason for Tang Gunak’s furrowed eyebrows.
“ermm….Tang Bo…..”
Chung Myung has been muttering the same thing over and over again. As he let out a broken sigh, his hand roaming on the table’s surface, try to reach another bottle. His hand doesn’t reach anything in the end so he is back to hide his face. Later, a muffled sound can be heard. The voice sounds hoarse and terribly hurt.
‘did he, cry?’<
No one would believe him if he said that Chung Myung is crying in his drunk state. But again, Tang Gunak realized the fact that no matter how genius and mature his first friend is, the boy is barely twenty. As a father himself, how can he bear watching a kid who is younger than most of his son, drown his cry with alcohol until he falls asleep?
”Tang Bo…who is this one you always called every time you come to drink with Tang family?”
It’s already humiliating enough for him, The Lord of Tang Family, wasn’t able to recognize the name that was supposed to be part of his family.
“I will look into it.”
*****
“Father, is there anyone named Tang Bo in our family?”
Unexpectedly, Soso came to ask the same question the next morning. Tang Gunak put down the report in his hand and walked towards his daughter. She has black shade under her eyes and her clothes smelled like some herbal that’s good for insomnia. Her face was full of distress.
“What’s the matter?”
“Chung Myung sanghyung, he hasn’t slept for days. I was actually hoping to find a good medicine from our house but nothing’s work.” said Soso as she pulls her hair in frustration. “Sago heard him call someone named Tang Bo after he collapsed from exhaustion another day, Jo Gul sanghyung also said the same thing. Do you know who is it?”
“I'm actually just about to find out.” Tang Gunak feels strangely uneasy since he heard how Chung Myung mutters that name in his sleep.
He can’t help but think, how’s a person’s name could sounds so painful to call, yet desperately needed? The only thing holding him back from asking it directly, is a clear understanding that whoever that person may be, he is already long gone.
His lost left pain that carved a hole in Chung Myung’s chest, as proof that a person was once settled there. He was and still is an irreplaceable part of him.
Tang Gunak tried his best to find something about the person, but in the end, he couldn’t find someone named Tang Bo in his family who seems to have a relationship with Chug Myung.
*******
“Ah! There you are, disciple Chung Myung!!” Chung Myung stopped on his track by the call. Tang Zhan, the one who called, hurriedly catching up and said with full enthusiasm. “Disciples, did you know that one of our ancestors is a friend of Plum Blossoms Swordsman??”
Chung Myung’s eyes widened at the sudden topic.
“Yes, I think I’ve heard a brief about it when we are in Yunan. What's with it?” Chung Myung asked uninterested, but secretly waiting for Tang Zhan to tell them what made him look so enthusiastic.
“I was cleaning the old record room and read the story about our elder. Then I became interested in his story, so I went to the elder’s old chamber.”
“His chamber still exist?”
“Well, it was left alone for more than 100 years. Although it was cleaned up regularly, everything was kept the same to honor his brave sacrifice in the war.”
Chung Myung bits the inner part of his mouth unconsciously.
“Then, guess what I found there?”
“Just tell me already.”
“I found the portrait of Plum Blossoms Swords Saint, painted by the elder himself!”
Thump!
Chung Myung feels his heart drop at the moment. He didn’t remember anything Tang Zhan said after that. All he knows is he was already running towards the deepest part of Tang family’s residence, and found a personal building surrounded by a small garden. The only thing that stands out is an old plum blossom tree that is standing right outside the window, with buds that still aren't fully blooming yet.
“I will take out the painting.” Tang Zhan let Chung Myung sit beside the window to wait.
This room is so quiet.
Since it's Tang Bo, Chung Myung expected it to be more luxurious or bright like the Tang Bo he knew. But this place is too dull, dark, and far from other residences. There are many books, mostly about medicine and poison. There are also some journals about personal experiments and self-made poets. This place is indeed Tang Bo’s place, but it has been left as a cold room without any sign of life.
“Here it is, disciple.” Tang Zhan opens up a scroll that seems to be the painting.
In that painting, a tall man wear white Mount Hua’s robe is standing with a plum engraved sword in his hand. He has a pair of plum colored eyes, the same as the blooming flower in the background. He has long black hair, tied up with a very long green ribbon. He looks dashing. It almost as if you can see him shining.
That man, the swordsman, is smiling. It is such a beautiful and honest smile. And more than anything, it is a happy smile. The man portrayed there is smiling so happily and looks so free. The flowers blooming with him in the center, as if he is the spring himself. You can feel so much care has been put into effort in every stroke and color to make it complete.
Chung Myung stayed silent for a long time. His feelings are too complicated after seeing the painting. Though Tang Zhan didn’t rush him, Chung Myung asked to be left alone
“Is there a portrait of the elder here too?” Chung Myung asked for the last time before Tang Zhan go out from the room
“Portrait of the elder? It's right there. Right in front of you. It's the only one though.”
“....thank you.”
Chung Myung lost his word at the painting hanging on the wall in front of him.
There is a portrait of a man dressed in black and green. Long black hair left partially loose, while a snake ornament made by jade neatly put a little bun in place. Dark green long robe covered most of his body silhouette, with black inner clothes only shown on his front. Pair of snake shaped earrings decorated his ears elegantly.
Inside the wooden framed painting, the man portrayed there has a gaze cold as stone. His lips pursed into a thin line. Pair of dark and hollow orbs replaced what was supposed to be the place of his emerald eyes. A black mist surrounded the man, giving a finishing touch to the painting, as it told the image the painter tried to convey. You can easily feel the fear form each stroke and brush that completed it.
It's like a portrait of imoogi who will pull anyone inside if they dare to stare a second longer.
Chung Myung sighs very hard. The mention of Tang Bo washed him with so many memories he hasn’t once forgotten all this time. But the more things he remembers about Tang Bo, the more broken he feel.
When he was remembering all the days they spent together, Tang Bo’s smile is always the first thing that appears in his mind. Sometimes, he remembers his smile as he tails from behind, being a chatter-box he is. Sometimes, he remembers Tang Bo’s smile bright and full of joy as he poured alcohol bottle after bottle until they both got drunk before forgot everything that happened in the morning. Sometimes, he remembers his assuring smile, as Chung Myung rested his head on the safest shoulder he could lean on.
Sometimes, he remembers Tang Bo’s smile as he said his last word and wakes up no longer.
Inside the very room that supposed to contain every part of his life, Chung Myung can’t find any traces of the Tang Bo he knew. There are records of him, but there is nothing to prove his soul ever lived in this room. In this room, there is only Tang Bo the elder of Tang family, but there is no Tang Bo who roamed free as he made his own name in the world.
There is no trace of his first and only friend.
His love.
His Tang Bo.
“I guess, this is the only thing left that contains your heart, huh…”
Ironically, it is a portrait the man Chung Myung hates and despises so much. It is the portrait of the man Tang Bo loves the most.
“Hyung-nim, how about making a portrait of us?”
“Portrait? What for?”
“For a memento of course. So I can show it off for the future generation. That once upon a time, Plum Blossoms Sword Saint has fallen in love with an elder from Tang family!”
“Seems like I hitted your head too hard, huh? Come here, I’m gonna break it for real!”
“Ugh! Why not~? Hyung-nim, don’t you want to left a memory with me??”
“No! It’s embarrassing.”
“Hyung-nim~!”
“I should have made it back then.”
Words can only become regret. The past can no longer be fixed.
“I miss you….Tang Bo.”
**********
“So… I heard you went to one of our former elder’s residences”
“...yes.”
Tang Gunak observed the teen in front of him closely. He looks different tonight, and in a good way. Chung Myung gulped a bottle of alcohol with ease and went for another one. He looks more free, as if a weight had lifted off his chest. Soso said he was able to have a good night's sleep yesterday. He looks like he was almost completely healed, but is really what important for him?
The hole is still there. The pain is still stinging.
Chung Myung didn’t plan to cover it up anytime soon, and maybe never in the future.
Because this hole is a better proof than a cold and dark room he saw. It sting because once someone he loved with all his heart settled there. Both the beautiful memory of his smile, and the pain of losing him, are proof of his existence.
There was someone he loves, named Tang Bo.
“Our elder name is Tang Bo.” Tang Gunak said in caution. afraid it will trigger a bad memory from the youth. But there is no one else in his family history that named Tang Bo, and although it sound ridiculous, he want to know if there is connection with the person Chung Myung’s know.
“I know…. Actually, his name reminds me of an old friend.”
“A friend?”
“Yes. You must have heard me calling for him in my sleep. Isn’t that why you made Tang Zhan Show me the room?”
Tang Gunak admitted his doing without much of a fight. He has been caught red handed, what else should he say? He just relieved everything ended well. Tang Gunak can see the acceptance in Chung Myung's eyes and know he no longer need to worry. He is alright now, in his own way.
“If it's okay with you. May I know what kind of person this friend of yours?”
“Well…. let’s see… how about I just show it to you?”
“Show it to me?”
“Yep. Lord, please believe me. I won’t hit you.”
“Huh?”
Swoossh!
There was a gust of wind, and suddenly a fist stopped an inch before his very eyes.
Tang Gunak blinked twice at the sudden provocation. He can’t help but felt a bit threatened after facing the unleashed power from that fist.
“You blinked.” said Chung Myung as he retreated his fist. “Even though I already said that I won’t hit you.”
“Ah, no… I’m just surprised. It was too sudden.”
“Even if I didn’t say anything, that person will know which of my fists is really intended to punch him. He will confidently face my fist without blinking, and even laughing back as he guesses it right when I stopped. But he also strong enough to stop my fist if he wants to. to. My Tang Bo is someone who knows me that much.”
Tang Gunak listen silently. For Chung Myung who almost never talk about himself, now he is talking about the person he holds dearly, taking all the time of the night that seem won't be enough for him to finish. He is listening, hoping he will understand a bit more about his first friend even if it won’t be as much as the person he is talking about with both joy and sorrow in his voice.