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The Bay Quarter Plaza of Yokohama.
God, this place looks so expensive.
Atsushi tugged the scarf around his neck a little more, puffs of cool air escaping him as he gazed out to the water of the port before him. Nerves clung to him like the shirt on his back, letting a sigh overcome him as he pulled out his phone and checked the time.
6:55, he had five more minutes until Akutagawa was meant to arrive. And, well, when he was supposed to get there himself, but he was nervous! And you can’t blame him for being twenty measly minutes early, right? (Thirty, actually, but nobody needs to know that.)
He just didn’t want anything to go wrong, really. He wanted to sort through his thoughts more before he’d confront Akutagawa on this day, this date. His ears tinged red just from the thought, wondering what his rival-boyfriend would wear to see him. And perhaps it made him a bit self-conscious of what he himself was wearing, but he tried his best, especially with the help of Yosano and Naomi.
A warm jacket hung on the elbows, thick black turtleneck with his light gray scarf, and extra baggy pants to fit the cold weather and some pure white, ankle-high boots to go with it. They never had much of a set dress-theme for this, so he didn’t expect anything so casual out of the other, he wasn’t the type to wear things like Atsushi, casual and comfortable. From what he remembers, it’s more of a classy and comfortable, or modern Victorian.
He certainly wasn’t complaining though, the other looked stunning every time.
“Still can’t believe it’s been so long…” he couldn’t help but mutter to himself, a shy smile on his face. But really, why wouldn’t he be in such disbelief? It has been five months since they first got together, even if they have yet to tell anyone else (although, he’s sure Akutagawa’s sibling is aware, if not, then they at least know their brother is dating someone, right?).
He’s surprised they even lasted so long in this secret relationship, with the more time he’d spend with the other, it became harder and harder for him to hide his affections towards the mafioso. Akutagawa just…had a way of charming him, he supposed.
He tried not to show excitement when he recognized the distinct sound of clicking footsteps out of the hundreds of others, making their way to him as he checked his phone. Seven O’ clock, on the dot as always.
“Jinko.”
Atsushi turned to face him, to greet the other-
But his words caught in his throat.
A beautiful black winter coat hugged the man’s frame perfectly, a similarly colored belt to help accentuate his waist with a turtleneck reminiscent to his worn underneath. It worked like a dress around him, falling just around the middle of his thighs with thick, black tights to accommodate the cold. With dark gray boots that stopped just below the knees and cute white fluff lining the top, Atsushi was almost hesitant to look him in the eyes, yet they continued to roam his outfit, taking in the wondrous sight. Classy and comfortable, just as he thought.
“Akutagawa…” He breathed out, finally looking him in the eyes, but the pair of fluffy white earmuffs caught him off guard, especially with the little purple bow hanging off one side.
“Seems you’ve waited long enough for me.” Akutagawa spoke with a teasing lilt in his voice that accompanied the barely there smirk as he stepped closer into Atsushi’s personal space. He couldn’t help but fluster from the proximity, even after so many months of being in each other’s space, something about now felt…different, really.
“I didn’t have to wait that long. I got here at least five minutes before you.” Atsushi huffed, unable to resist the temptation to bring the other closer by the waist, truly taking a moment to further indulge in the sight before him.
“Please, Jinko. You are not fooling anyone.” Akutagawa hummed with a roll of his pretty, pretty eyes, a movement that really should not enrapture Atsushi so much, but here he was. Akutagawa placed a hand against his chest, and Atsushi wondered if he could feel just how fast his heart was beating, thundering in his chest.
So close that their foreheads rest against one another, they take a moment to feel at ease in each other’s presence, feeling the cold wind drift around them. Desire to kiss lips so close to his was carved deeply into Atsushi’s core, yet he resisted instead to speak up.
“Where’d you get that outfit from? I haven’t seen it in your wardrobe before.” Akutagawa leans back a bit, adjusting the hand purse he also adorned over his shoulder. “Gin let me have it. I told them it was for a special occasion.”
Atsushi couldn’t help but chuckle at that, raising an eyebrow. “What kind of ‘special occasion’ would that be?” He asked, to which the Rashomon user huffed and turned his head away. “Like you need to know such an uninteresting detail, were-tiger.”
“Yeah yeah, alright. You keep your secrets.” Atsushi playfully pouted, before taking Akutagawa’s hand in his own, placing a kiss over the white glove. “Shall we get going then? I’d hope you're just as excited as I am.” He spoke with a smile.
Lucky is he to see the faint blush that tainted Akutagawa’s face, knowing it wasn’t only from the cold weather. “I suppose we shouldn’t idle for too long.” He mumbled, a hand habitually coming up to cover his mouth as he averted his gaze.
Delight shone in the sunrise eyes of the man-tiger as they began their walk into the heart of the plaza, watching as predominantly couples and families would walk by, full of the Christmas spirit as catchy festive music would play over the speakers.
Truth be told, Atsushi’s never truly been to Bay Quarter, so Akutagawa was the one to be leading them around, showing off all that the plaza had to offer. From fancy stores to nice restaurants, the other seemed to take pride in the way Atsushi’s astoundment was so clear.
“Hey, Aku.” Atsushi piped up after a while more of walking, causing Akutagawa to stop his own little window shopping to turn to him with a hum. “Are you uh…egh,” Atsushi sweatdropped with a sheepish smile. “Are you sure it’s okay to be spending your money so haphazardly?”
The only response he got out of that was a deadpan.
Okay, yeah, he was rich as heck. Point taken.
“Yeaaaah, I'll take it back.” “As you should, fool.” Atsushi huffed at that, and dragged him closer by the waist once more, rewarding him with a little startle from the other. But with the way that belt perfectly snatched his waist, how could he not give some love to it?
The two continued to make their peaceful walk around the plaza, commenting over items that got their attention (“Plush cat-” “Jinko no.” “Plush cat though-” “ No. ”), or some nice jewelry they’d spot (“That would make a lovely engagement ring.” “Yeah, I know right-wait what?! ” “Hah.”)
Atsushi was just happy to be here with Akutagawa, standing in a store as said beautiful man of his curiously inspected a snow globe from off the shelf, clearly intrigued. “What’s in it?” Atsushi asked when he noticed Akutagawa chuckle in amusement. The other looked at him smugly, before showcasing what was inside it.
The Port Mafia buildings.
“Oh wha-they sell that!?” Atsushi sputtered, coming over to take a closer look as Akutagawa shrugged. “I was unaware they did. I should buy this for Tachihara, he’d surely find it something to laugh about.”
Atsushi, feeling silly, gave Akutagawa an incredulous look. “Are you thinking about other men? On our date?? ” Akutagawa proceeded to deadpan him, before giving a little smirk and replying with, “Maybe I am, Jinko .”
That should not sound so hot, given the context, but Atsushi was only a man. A very weak man.
“So, is this it?” he whined. “You’re breaking up with me? In this shop? Aisle five at…" he quickly checked his phone, "7:20 in the night??” His boyfriend had the audacity to scoff at him and his dramatics, hip jutting out sassily (that he totally didn’t fixate on. Definitely.), clearly finding hilarity in Atsushi’s playful predicament.
Atsushi gave him his best teary puppy eyes, and the blush he received was almost as good as the kiss planted on his cheek. “You said I’d be stuck with you when you confessed to me, Jinko; I don’t see that changing any time soon.”
Weak in the knees. Completely and utterly.
“Sly bastard.” Atsushi grumbled, dutifully following beside the other after he had returned the snow globe to its rightful place on the shelf, once again taking his hand. “Love-sick tiger.” Akutagawa shot back. But he wasn’t wrong, so he couldn’t actually say anything back.
“Want to go grab some food?” Atsushi suggested, his boyfriend humming in contemplation before giving a subtle nod. “I suppose so. A bite to eat wouldn’t hurt.” Atsushi smiled at that, the duo exiting the store they were in to go wander around for a restaurant to occupy.
It didn’t take long for them to find a restaurant to fill their stomachs at, entering a KollaBo and letting a waiter seat them at a table for two.
Atsushi took to pulling the chair out for Akutagawa, who rolled his eyes but gratefully took the act of chivalry. Atsushi pulled off his jacket and hung it over the back of the chair along with his scarf, Akutagawa pulling off the earmuffs and letting them hang around his neck. Receiving their menus, the two held idle chatter as they each made their decisions.
“You think Dazai-san and Chuuya-san will get together next year?”
“Doubt it, Jinko. They’re both utter imbeciles when it comes to romantic feelings.”
Well, if gossiping over their coworkers’ relationships is called ‘idle chatter’, that is.
“True, true.” Atsushi nodded absentmindedly, setting his menu down with his food and drink choice in mind. “But like, I think at least Chuuya-san is starting to get it, Dazai-san’s still stubborn. I’m getting Seafood Yaki Udon , by the way.”
“ Vegetarian Soybean Soup for me. And don’t expect much from Dazai-san, his emotion skills in general are worse than subpar.” Atsushi let out a low sigh, muttering how he wholeheartedly agreed there. As much of a good mentor as Dazai-san is now , his lack of understanding towards his own feelings was a whole monster to get through in itself.
“Oh, they have Fig Sweet Tea . I wonder if it tastes different here…” Akutagawa chimed in, tilting his head a bit. Atsushi smiled softly at the movement, watching as his boyfriend (Gods, still can’t believe he can call him that now…) flagged down a waitress, saying they were ready to make their orders.
The waitress dutifully wrote down their orders, letting them know that it’ll only be a ten or so minutes for them to receive, before going about her job, allowing them their time alone. “Hmm, y’know,” Atsushi piped up, catching Akutagawa’s attention.
“I’m surprised we’ve been able to keep it from the others so long. I mean, I wouldn’t be surprised if Ranpo-san knew and just never said anything, but I kinda thought that at least Dazai-san or Yosano-sensei would catch on.” He spoke, fiddling with his sleeve cuff as Akutagawa nodded.
“Indeed, I would have suspected Kouyou-san or Gin to know, maybe Hirotsu-san, but nothing.” Atsushi hummed and tilted his head, a playful smile on his face. “Guess deduction isn’t on their side?”
“Ugh, you and your awful detectives. I should kill you right now, were-tiger.” Akutagawa teased, slipping into a similar routine they had before this, yet the affectionate tone was too easy to catch. “Like you’d be able to kill me, Akutagawa,” Atsushi played along, leaning into the other with a grin of his own. “You may be able to kill hundreds with Rashomon, but I’ve got the healing ability of a motherfucker on my side-” Akutagawa snorted at that, putting his head down on the table and smacking Atsushi in the head.
“You would never say that Jinko!” He chuckled, causing Atsushi to laugh along with him. “Swearing sounds so unnatural coming from your mouth, don’t say it again.” Atsushi found amusement in the way Akutagawa looked up at him, eyelashes fluttering in the attractive way they do whenever they lock gazes.
“Yeah, I don’t really curse that often, do I?” Atsushi sweatdropped and Akutagawa sat up, the two subconsciously finding each other’s hands to hold. “Of course not, you’re much too innocent for such unsanitary language.” Atsushi gave him a raise of a brow, before smiling and saying, with the utmost burst of confidence known to man;
“ Fuck you. ”
Akutagawa, caught off guard, slapped his palms against the table, sputtering for a moment before he reached over and started smacking Atsushi over the head, who playfully pleaded for mercy as he tried to guard himself pathetically. “What did I just say!? No swearing from you, Jinko! Christ!”
Atsushi caught Akutagawa’s hand, instead using it to rest his cheek against, placing a kiss to his palm with a hum and smile. “Sorry~!” He chimed, sounding very much not sorry. Akutagawa couldn’t even retaliate, instead resigning his fate to letting Atsushi purr and rub up his palm like the cat he refused to admit he was.
Small talk continued on, occasionally people watching from the window they sat next to, enjoying each other's presence. They received their drinks fairly quickly, the two speaking they're thanks to the waitress before they resumed being enthralled in one another.
Another thing about their relationship that Atsushi held dear to his heart. Their talks, when not concerning work or colleagues, missions and cases, were strikingly peaceful. A casual setting nobody would expect from the ‘Mad Dog’ of the Port Mafia and the ‘Were-tiger’ of the Agency, always at each other's throats in the battlefield, taking jabs at their trauma and causing more harm than good to each other's self-conscience.
But that doesn’t happen anymore. As much as they still like to participate in their game of insults, they avoid what makes each other hurt, and be mindful of what can and can’t genuinely piss the other off. They’ve come to an understanding that their trauma, at its core, are very similar. They shouldn’t commit hypocrisy upon each other for such a selfish thing as hate.
His view of the world has changed, and with that his understanding of Akutagawa. He could understand now, and with understanding came a want to help from Atsushi. To reconcile, start anew.
And he’s so, so glad they did.
Because the smiling, classy Akutagawa Ryunnosuke before him now, is just as beautiful as the Akutagawa Ryuunosuke he met in the beginning, viscous and truly just in need of someone who could see him as more than what was on the surface. He accepts the murder, although he still doesn’t appreciate it , he accepts what Ryuunosuke has done to keep his own crushed hopes, so he doesn’t shy away, he doesn’t flinch in the face of this man, he understands as much as he can.
“Akutagawa.” Atsushi chimes in once his partner’s musings have died down. “Hmm?” The other hummed, watching him with those stormy, dark gray eyes that never failed to catch his appeal.
“I love you…” The hand on his cheek flinched, and he smiled at the prominent blush that enveloped the other’s face, eyes widening in surprise.
“I…don’t just go springing that on me, man-tiger.” Akutagawa huffed grumpily but let his thumb rub against Atsushi’s cheek all the same, showing his reciprocation of feelings through mere actions alone.
“Sorry, I can’t help it. I was thinking and…I just really, really love you. So much. ” Akutagawa let out a huff of a laugh, clearly far too used to Atsushi’s sappiness and declarations of affection. “You’re truly love-sick, you sappy tiger.”
“Mmmm, I know you enjoy it, Akutagawa.” Atsushi smiled teasingly, the other scoffing with a roll of his eyes before he (reluctantly, Atsushi noted) pulled his hand away. The lingering warmth still filled Atsushi with butterflies in the stomach.
The waitress came only a minute or so later with their orders, and the sappy atmosphere had lifted to something playful, bantering with each other and gossiping about the relationships of their colleagues, to bashing on the enemies they’ve beaten on their joint missions and laughing about their teasing grievances in the love department.
And Atsushi couldn’t help but think to himself that this was it.
This was his perfect relationship. He never wants there to be an end.
And he knows, from the shine of those eyes, Akutagawa feels the same way.
…
After their early dinner, the two set off into the plaza square.
The place was decorated for Christmas, people walking everywhere, crowding some places here and there. The pair weren’t often too fond of crowds, but tonight it had been overlooked as neither could get enough of the other’s presence.
They took to admiring the unbelievably big tree (really,it was far too big to be real!) in the middle of it all, decked from top to bottom with ornaments and decorations of all kinds. Atsushi marveled at it, eyes sparkling with awe as Akutagawa stood by his side.
“That’s not real…right?” Atsushi turned to ask, and Akutagawa shrugged. “Don’t ask me, Jinko. It could very well be a tree imported from abroad, I’ve heard that some places have trees bigger than this.”
“Well, I mean, of course there’s gotta be. But the way it’s structured seems so surreal!” Atsushi responded, throwing his hands forward to frantically gesture to the tree. “There can’t be a tree that just looks like that and is twice the size of a normal one, right??” Akutagawa didn’t answer his question then, merely letting out a hum before grabbing Atsushi’s hand, wandering away from the big tree.
“Sheesh, okay, don’t answer me then!” Atsushi pouted, but dutifully let himself be dragged along, if only to be able to walk a little bit behind Akutagawa. He was still just a man, after all.
“I know you're eyeing me, Were-tiger. Don’t be a pervert.” Atsushi sputtered, heat rising to his face as he stumbled for words. “Well-I-it-I’m-I’m not being perverted! I just-you’re very pretty and…and-Okay, look- ”
His boyfriend chuckled at Atsushi’s struggles, and the other whined. “I’m a weak man, Akutagawa! Spare me just a look, pleeeease?” He practically begged, resting his chin on the mafioso’s shoulder. “Not in public you're not.” Was the response.
“So, in private is good?” “Sure, if you want.”
Atsushi’s never felt so blessed in his life.
“Simp.” Akutagawa accused.
“Shamelessly!” Atsushi agreed.
“Hmm…Oh, look.” The nonchalant tone of his voice captivated Atsushi, and he almost missed the other pointing upwards, having stopped walking to do so. Atsushi looked up, confused, before jolting a bit in surprise.
They stood in front of a shop door.
A mistletoe overhead.
Atsushi couldn’t help but laugh, realizing just how much Akutagawa could steal his sense of surroundings, all with his presence alone. “I have one on my bang, is that not enough for you?”
“I’d like to do things the traditional way, Jinko.” “So I’ve heard.” Atsushi lifted himself from Akutagawa’s shoulder, the other turning to wrap an arm around his neck, pulling him closer with a grace that almost knocked the air out of his lungs. “Have I ever told you how graceful you are, for a Mafioso?” Atsushi whispered, his own hands finding purchase on Akutagawa’s thin hips.
“Many times, Jinko. Many times.” Atsushi chuckled as they pressed their foreheads together, and he couldn’t help but remember the countless times they’ve kissed, how nice it was, how good he felt being able to kiss someone like Akutagawa.
He wanted to feel the lightness again, feel his heart flipping in his chest like it always does. He wanted to feel Akutagawa’s lips again, map them out the way he always does.
And Akutagawa doesn’t spare him a moment to make that wish come true.
Slow was the press of their lips, the easy rhythm they fell into, so intimately familiar with it. Akutagawa’s lips are soft, and he moved with a confidence that was hardly there in the first few weeks of their relationship. How they grew so used to this in so little time, this familiar dance and song of press and feel, it made Atsushi’s heart flutter and beat, as though he’d never felt more alive than right here, right now in this moment.
The kiss was short, but it felt like centuries before they pulled away, and Atsushi practically melted with the way Akutagawa curled his fingers into his hair, familiar and domestic. Scratching in just the right spot that made him purr with delight, hardly registering the way Akutagawa guided them away from the mistletoe, away from the store front.
“You silly cat.” He smiled to himself, unable to deny that fact as he leaned into the warmth of that black coat he wore, melting into Akutagawa’s embrace and wrapping his arms tight around him.
He was in love. He was so in love.
“Come now, get your head out of La La Land. This date won’t progress on its own.” Atsushi hardly complained, letting out a little chuckle before moving away from Akutagawa’s personal space.
He flinched at the feeling of hot breath against his face, and it took him a moment to realize that his boyfriend pressed a kiss right to his nose. God, someone kill him, please. Akutagawa was going to be the death of him.
They’re date took them almost all-around Bay Quarter, admiring the different shops, taking in the sights of the lit-up plaza from the second and even third storey. They contemplated buying stuff, did buy some stuff, such as the pretty jeweled bracelet now adorning Akutagawa’s wrist, or the little cat charm that Atsushi clipped to his belt; they even went back to that store from before and bought the snow globe Akutagawa saw before. A joke present for Christmas, which he promised to tell Atsushi how it went after.
And it took them ages, buying things and Atsushi insisting to carry it all (he’d gotten better at that from Yosano’s many shopping trips), and by the time they found themselves leaning against the railing of the Bay Quarter’s rim, shopping bags placed on the ground just beside them, it was at least 9:30 in the night, close to closing time.
Atsushi let out an emotion filled sigh, heart full of glee and his body feeling more relaxed than it had ever been up to this point. The sea before them was a breathtaking sight, with its clear blue reflecting the gold, white, green and red of the Christmas themed lights decorating the plaza, like one big stretch that faded from golden and specks of color, to a deep and dark wash of blue and black in the horizon.
The things he feels are so extremely strong in Akutagawa’s presence, he doesn’t even know how to put it into words he hasn’t already said before in their time together. The way the other stood, posture perfectly straight with confidence yet looking so light with an air of content, like the feather of an angel, or the angel himself.
White tipped bangs fluttered in the breeze as he took in the sight of the sea, yet Atsushi knew he was aware of the staring, with the way he grasped Atsushi’s hand in his, giving it a comfortably light squeeze.
“Atsushi.” Sparks lit up in his heart at the whisper of his name, like the chiming of heavenly bells, mumbled on precious lips like his. Atsushi gave a weak hum, leaning more on the railing than usual with the jelly feeling in his knees.
“Thank you. This date has been…wonderful.” Better than he thought, better than he wished , and the thought made Atsushi’s mind turn to mush, a dopey little smile on his face.
“You’re welcome, Ryuunosuke.” The light blush on his skin made the sight seem even more captivating, and it was taking everything in him not to overwhelm his boyfriend with the best kiss he could muster.
He pulled Akutagawa in by the waist, and rested his head against the other’s shoulder, who took it as an opportunity to run his fingers through silver hair, occasionally bumping the mistletoe that hung from Atsushi’s bang.
“I’m wearing a mistletoe.” Atsushi reminded the other, and he smiled at the kiss he felt against his forehead. “Well, not the kiss I was expecting, but I’ll take any.” He felt more than heard the light snort of amusement. “You’ll get it soon, man-tiger. Be patient for once.”
Atsushi chuckled but waited patiently anyway.
The tiger purrs within him, he can’t help but relate to it.
“The tiger seems to have enjoyed this too, Ryuunosuke.” Atsushi hummed happily, snuggling more into the other’s side as Akutagawa gently rubbed his shoulder. “Hmm.” Akutagawa hummed, as if in thought. Atsushi turned his head up to look at him more properly-
Only to be caught off-guard by a kiss that could revive one’s soul.
So gentle, and thoughtful, with a subtle vigor that always left him wanting, yearning. Akutagawa’s hand slid to his cheek, vocalizing the purrs of the tiger from deep in the back of the detective’s throat as he stood a little straighter, adjusting himself to melt into the kiss.
Atsushi’s hand landed tentatively against Akutagawa’s hand, fingers lacing in, and eye closed in content. They’d be breaking off for air and falling back into each other, again and again and again, without rhyme nor reason other than the emotions which bubbled to the surface.
A devotion, a love, entranced and enthralled, the tiger would growl in ways only he understood. That want to stay forever, to have a life so truly focused on this love, nothing to come between them.
A life partner, someone to share the rest of forever with, because he loved him.
‘I love him’ , such beautiful words they were, “I love you.” he uttered out gently, just like a prayer, a smile overtaking his boyfriend as he pressed their foreheads together. “I love you too.” he muttered into the wind, only to be heard by Atsushi, and Atsushi alone.
“Be my partner forever, Ryuunosuke.” Akutagawa blinked and smiled, the sweetest-of-honey chuckles spilling from thin lips, and it only served to pull the were-tiger into the deepest, purest throes of love. He didn’t need to hear the answer to know…
Heart hammering, feelings on display, he can’t get enough, and he doesn’t want to. Another kiss, even deeper and much longer than the last couple hundred, and Atsushi’s never felt more loved. To love, and have it come back in full, what he’s always wanted and now has. Nothing could be better; Nothing.
“Merry Christmas, Ryuunosuke.”
“Merry Christmas, Atsushi.”
“Tomorrow’s our Anniversary. I’ll make breakfast-in-bed?”
“Oh? How lovely of you, Nakajima.”
Atsushi’s face was on fire, a smile in eyes of sunrise, a promise in the woes of silence as the wind blew and the choir bells rang, the lights so bright and his heart so full, he realized yet again something so important whenever Ryuunosuke was there.
This is what it meant to fall in love on Christmas Eve.