Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The mug of coffee burnt your hand slightly as you walked through the hallway to Isaac’s office. Upon reaching the door you knocked gently to let him know you were coming in.

“Uh, just a moment” He stammered, but you had already walked through the door. His back was turned to you and although he was fast, you managed to see just a glimpse of his face as he dabbed a tissue to his eye before promptly throwing it away. He turned to face you, clearing his throat and straightening his tie as you looked at him, as much as he tried to hide it, it was still evident. His eyes were tinged slightly red, his nose was blocked as he breathed in and his gaze, although looking at you, was glazed with sorrow. You’d seen him vulnerable like this before, the day in the garden was proof of that but it was still a rare sight considering his constant stoicism.

You decided not to pry, things were already tense enough between the two of you, plus it was obvious what he was grieving about. The news of Vic's death was sudden and will likely keep him more shunned and reserved for a while, you need to give him space.

"Your coffee’s ready" You spoke softly, placing it on his desk.

"Thank you" He muttered bringing the cup straight to his lips despite the scalding temperature. However, he didn't flinch or move the cup away from him even when it burned down his throat. He just sat and took the pain hoping to quiet the banging in his mind. Another thing to expect is more self-destructive behaviours from Isaac in the coming days. When the anniversary was coming near he lost a lot of sleep and drank more than usual, so you could only imagine how much worse these habits would become after losing Vic.

Considering his state, you decided to head to bed early instead of continuing your work with him, giving him his much-needed time alone.

– – – – – – –

"1:07AM"

Read on your alarm clock when you awoke groggily with the sudden urge to use the bathroom. You groaned in exhaustion knowing that you'd be uncomfortable if you tried to go back to sleep, so reluctantly you moved out of bed and quietly headed to the bathroom.

However, after finishing up and trying to silently tiptoe back to bed a crash from the kitchen startled you out of your subconscious state. You rushed towards the sound begging for it not to be an intruder only to find Isaac.

His knees were scrunched to his chest as he crouched to the floor, an ice tray next to him and cubes of quickly melting ice scattered around him. He was attempting to pick them up with his hands and place them back in the tray, subsequently getting his work attire wet as pools of water flooded against his knees when he crawled to collect some that were further away.

"Isaac? Isaac what are you doing it's one in the morning" You whispered. You didn't want to sound harsh, you could tell what he was doing, the new and now empty whiskey bottle on the counter spoke volumes.

He lifted his head at the sound of your voice, muttering your name.

"- 'm sorry I didn't hear you come in, I promise I'll clean this up" His words were slurred and quiet, and his face was flushed pink. He was looking you in the eyes but somehow they seemed to go straight past you as a shameful look of displeasure dawned on his face.

He looked away, continuing to stumble cleaning up the scattered ice cubes.

"No, no Isaac it's okay, I'll clean it. I think you should just lie down"

"No, but — I made the mess" He stuttered his words as he frowned. You felt awkward, he was going to kill you when he sobers up the next morning. As soon as he realises you saw him at his most vulnerable state, he's just going to close off even more. You had to end this now.

"Isaac no, you need to rest and go back to bed" You crouched down speaking to him like a parent to a child. It seemed to get through to him this time and he gripped the counter to help steady himself and turned towards the door. You expected him to head to his room but he changed his direction to you and pulled you into a hug. He was leaning down awkwardly and burying his face into your neck, wrapping his arms around your waist.

“I’m sorry for this” He uttered against you before squeezing your waist a bit. He let go after a short second and, with eyes downcasted, left to his room.

– – – – – – –

You finished cleaning up the small mess Isaac had made in the kitchen in under 3 minutes. It wasn’t a huge mess it was really just water on the ground you could wipe up, you ended up washing and drying the cup he was using too and disposed of the whiskey bottle as well. Thinking ahead though, you grabbed another cup and poured water in it as well as grabbed a pack of Advil from the cupboard to bring to Isaac for when he woke up the next morning.

Assuming he was asleep you cracked open his door to set the items down on his bedside, slowly and gently tip-toeing towards his bed you could see his face through the slight light peeping through the door. His face was still pink and he had a slight furrow in his eyebrows, his eyes were shut but at the same time they weren’t relaxed enough for him to be asleep, so it didn’t surprise you when his eyes fluttered open after you set the cup down on the table.

“Oh Isaac I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you” You apologized quietly.

“No no, it’s fine. I wasn’t asleep” His words were still slurring and timid but he seemed to be calmer than before.

“Alright then well, I was just leaving these here for you in the morning. Goodni-” You’re words fell off your tongue when you felt a sudden tug on your hand. Looking back up to Isaac his face was now buried into the pillow but he continued to pull on your hand until you were at level with his face. “Isaac, what's gotten into you?” Hardly a fair question since he was drunk, but still you didn’t know what to say in the situation.

He turned to you after that, his face still hard to see but you could still make out the pained expression on his face. Tears fell down his cheeks as he stared right into your eyes, fully focused on you.

“Stay” He mumbled so quietly you thought your ears were just messing with you.

“What? Isaac no I can’t do that” If seeing him vulnerable like this wouldn’t piss Isaac off tomorrow, sleeping in his bed certainly will. You can’t do anything more that might distance you further.

“Please?” His eyes were downcasted again, disappointment etched on his face as if he knew the answer but still wanted to try, but with that look of sadness, you caved. You loved Isaac and cared about him so deeply, you’d do anything to hold him close to you.

So even though you knew he would probably hate you in the morning for this you lay down right next to him in his bed. It felt weird to be this close to him, sure you’ve kissed him and you did fall asleep with him on the couch that one time, but those were ignored or pushed away. This can’t be ignored tomorrow, he’s just going to wall himself off even more and your progress will be down the drain. But even with all that, the thought and pain of knowing how he’ll react in the morning, the feeling of him backing against you and curling up beside you made your heart warm. You placed an arm around his front just over his stomach and he looped his own hand there to interlock with yours, the intimate setting encouraging you to rest your face in his neck.

"I don't— I don’t want you to leave" He mumbled out. You had almost fallen asleep by this point so you were startled to even hear his voice let alone a blatant contradiction to everything he was saying earlier.

"What? But I thought you said I couldn't stay here?"

"No, no, no, I was just saying that— I haven’t want— I haven’t wanted someone to be this close in— in a long time" He spoke quietly again words less incoherent but still mumbly. He turned around and faced you now burying his face in your chest, you could feel a slight dampness from his teary eyes but you paid no mind to it.

"I think you should—” You paused, this could be your only chance to talk to him about this and have him actually honest about it but subjecting him to a conversation like that while drunk you knew wasn’t a good idea. So breathing in you pressed your face against his head, his hair smelling faintly of cigarettes, and you continued.

“I think you should just head to sleep, Isaac”

He then nodded in your chest as your fingers gently glided through his hair, both your breathings slowed afterwards and the two of you drifted off soundly.

– – – – – – –

When you awoke Isaac wasn’t next to you, you were disappointed but you expected it anyways. The Advil and glass were at least taken which was a good sign. You sighed content with that though and glanced at the clock next to you.

“10:02AM”

Shit.

Chapter Text

You jolted up out of Isaac’s bed and rushed towards his study. You were in your pyjamas but you didn’t care, you still had a job it was completely unprofessional to sleep in that late. Once you reached his door you knocked hastily, no response. You attempted to open the door but it was locked, which would make sense considering it was his study but ever since you became his assistant he's kept it open for you so you could go in and out without having to ask for the lock code.

“For fuck sake was he going to physically lock himself away too!?” You swore to yourself, knocking louder and harder on his door and continuing to fiddle with the handle.

“Uh, what are you doing?”

A voice coming from behind you startled you into a small yelp as you whipped your head around. Isaac was standing there, a cup of coffee in his hand and he was also still in his sleeping wear. You were beyond confused at this point.

“Isaac? Sorry I was just trying to find you, how come you aren’t working?”

“I spoke to Asriel. After last night he advised I should take a week off starting today and he helped me inform my clients as well”

You couldn’t believe it, he was actually going to take an extended time off and to top things off he mentioned last night so casually, you might be keeping more progress than you thought.

“Considering I’m taking a week off you won't need to work as my assistant for that time either” He continued. “As for your cleaning duties I’ll be less busy so I can help around the house, which is why I didn’t wake you up. You deserved to sleep in anyways after um – having to take care of me last night” He swallowed a thick lump down his throat and averted his eyes from you in embarrassment, rubbing his neck.

“Hey it’s alright, I didn’t mind” You leaned over to maintain eye contact with him “I’m proud of you Isaac you need to take care of yourself. What are you planning to do first?”

He timidly smiled.

“Gardening”

– – – – – – –

The day was spent mostly in comfortable silence. You helped Isaac a little bit with his planting and spoke to each other every now and then but at around midday, you decided to head inside and let him continue on his own. Dinner was slightly awkward but was still enjoyable as he helped cook with you and after a more relaxing day you found yourself lounging in your room.

It was around 11 at night when a knock on your door pulled you away from your thoughts. After you said to come in, Isaac came through your door shutting it behind him.

“Hi, did you need something?” You spoke out when he came in.

“Oh no, not really” He paused for a second. “I just wanted to properly thank you for last night since I didn’t really today, and I wanted to thank you for the painkillers and water you left out for me, it definitely helped and was really thoughtful” He looked up at you timidly.

“Hey it’s no problem I really didn’t mind it, I’m glad I was able to help” You smiled at him sitting up in your bed a bit more. “Did you say you told Asriel about last night?” You continued.

“Only the getting drunk bit, I didn’t mention anything you did” He approached your bed sitting down in front of you.

“Right, I am sorry about that though, I know I must have overstepped your boundaries so I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable ”

“No! No! It’s not your fault, I asked you to do so and I don’t blame you” He shook his hands in front of you and bowed his head slightly in embarrassment.

You breathed a slight sigh of relief you completely overestimated how he would react, he was more apologetic than anything which took a massive weight off your shoulders.

“You remember it then?”

“Unfortunately…” He trailed off in shame.

“Hey like I said, it’s no issue so don’t stress about it. You already have enough of it and you don’t deserve anymore on your week off”

You took his hand and rubbed your thumb over his knuckles. He looked back up at you and smiled faintly, his eyes shimmering with a tinge of sorrow, however. You stared back at him when an idea came to you, it was very direct and you weren’t sure how he was going to react but you might as well shoot your shot, right?

“Yaknow, I have some massage oil back in my drawers from when I used to live on my own, if you want I can maybe give you a shoulder massage to ease out any tension?”

He seemed stunned for a moment and looked at you with a suspicious face.

“A massage? Really?” He asked, still shocked you even suggested it. “It’s a bit late for something like that” He continued.

“It’s fine it won’t take long, I don’t plan on making you stay up too late”

He contemplated for a moment. “Alright, I’ll give it a shot”

– – – – – – –

You finally managed to find the massage oil you got a while ago, it was still in date and when you sniffed it, its scent was still strong and it smelt fine. When you turned around Isaac was lying on your bed stiff as a board. His arms were folded over his chest and he was looking straight at the ceiling very intently.

“I hope you realise that you need to relax your muscles a bit more” You giggled and he blushed, setting his hands by his sides and breathing in. When you walked over to him you realised one more thing.

“Oh um, you’re also going to need to take your shirt off”

“Oh, right…” He trailed off.

“Don’t be nervous, I’ve seen you shirtless before anyway”

“What? When??”

“Like whenever you swam, dummy”

He went to protest against your meek insult but decided to just shut his mouth and ignore it before sitting up and taking off his shirt. Meanwhile, you sat up against the headboard behind him and placed a pillow on your lap and once Isaac was finished he turned around to face you. Upon seeing him, your face grew warm and you attempted not to blatantly stare at him and continued with putting the oil on your hands.

"Here put your head on the pillow and I can start" You told him with a tinge of embarrassment in your voice

He responded with a quiet "Sure" and put his head down on the pillow. He shut his eyes and breathed in as you began to rub his shoulders. You squeezed and gently massaged his shoulders on both sides before working your way up to his neck continuing your action. As you were doing this, he lightly groaned when you pressed against a certain spot on his neck and his eyes flew open as red crept onto his face. You were looking down at him as his eyes met yours and at that moment the two of you seemed to realise just how intimate this setting was; Your hand was just under his jaw your thumbs resting on his chin, tilting his head up towards you, his breathing had slowed and you hadn’t even realised your fingers that had been lightly tracing his collarbone just a moment prior.

“Ugh – S-sorry”

“It’s okay” You giggled at him, as he turned his head letting you continue.

You continued moving your hand against his neck and up to his hair playing with the strands.

“Have I told you just how nice your hair is?”

“Huh?” His eyes opened again. “No. You think so?”

“Mhm”

“Thank you” He smiled shyly again, and beckoned you to lean down slightly to where his hands could reach comfortably before threading his hand through your hair. “I like yours too”

His hand lingered there for a moment as you stared at each other again. What surprised you the most though, was his other hand went up to the other side of your face before pulling you down and kissing your lips. The kiss was short and simple, your lips against his for a couple of seconds, before you pulled back. His eyes were lidded when you pulled back, and his face was flushed but so was yours except you looked more like a flustered mess.

“Isaac, are – are you sure?”

“Yes, keep going please”

You leaned down again, pushing your lips against his with a bit more pressure, and you felt his breath tickle your nose as he sighed into the kiss. Your hands continued to travel down his torso as you continued to kiss, deepening it as much as you could from the awkward angle. You disconnected the kiss after your hands travelled down close to his chest.

“Isaac, I want you. I want you so bad. Please can I” You rasped out, looking into his eyes with so much need.

“Yes, but give me a moment”

He got up to leave for a second and you freaked out. You hadn’t done anything in so long, what are you going to do?? Jumping up you did your best to refresh your room and make it look better. You sprayed a nice scented mist in your room to help it smell better, went to the bathroom quickly and turned on your lamp light to make a better atmosphere before sitting back down on your bed.

He walked back into your room holding a condom and a small bottle of lube before placing it on the bedside.

“Are you sure you want to do this? We can slow down” He told you, holding your chin before leaning down for a kiss.

“No it’s fine, I– I really want to” You stuttered out, flustered as all hell as he looked at you with needy eyes.

“Alright then, lie down”

You did so and Isaac followed you and hovered over you. Straddling you, he lifted your shirt above your head to expose your body and he leaned down to trail kisses across your body, in the process groping your chest and pinching your nipples. You moaned out at the sudden stimulation and you put your hands against him trailing down his chest and abdomen until he trailed further down your body and you couldn’t reach. He continued to kiss down your body before reaching the waistband of your pants.

“Can I?” He looked up at you with pleading eyes. You nodded quickly. “I need your words”

“Please Isaac” You whined out.

He pulled down your pants and underwear at the same time. You covered your eyes with your hands in embarrassment and he lifted your thighs onto his shoulders gripping your legs tightly. Holy shit, he was going to eat you out. Before he did so, however, he grabbed your chin once more and turned you to look at him.

“Look at me, I want you to see” You were bright red at this point as he looked up at you from in between your thighs. “That's it, you just keep looking at me, with those pretty eyes” He leaned down and licked a stripe up your sex trying to maintain eye contact till you turned away. “Don’t take your eyes off me” He told you grabbing your chin again before licking you again. You moaned once more and kept trying to look at him as he continued. He sucked and licked your sensitive areas as you grew wetter and closer to your climax. You moaned loudly as his tongue lapped at you quicker and in your pleasure missed his hand reaching for the lube and pumping some into his hand. He then pressed his fingers to the entrance of your hole and your head jerked towards him and he lifted his head from your legs.

“Can I?”

“Yes, god please” You breathed out in want.

He lowered his head once more, continuing his sucking, before pushing two fingers into you. You moaned out louder as he slowly stretched you out and pumped them further into you up to the last knuckle.

“F-fuck” You cried out and moaned again as your climax crept up to you and with one final thrust you came hard into his mouth, and even after he still continued to eat you out helping you ride it out as you threw your head back against the pillow. He slowed to a stop and looked up at you once again grabbing a tissue to wipe his chin, legs still propped up on his shoulders. He crawled up your body again tilting your chin towards him before kissing you once more, this time he pushed his tongue into your mouth and you could taste yourself through him.

“Was it good?” He breathed out after the kiss.

“Yes, it was great, thank you” You breathed out with a laugh. “Now” You continued. “Let me repay you” You pushed on his shoulder and he sat up against the headboard as you straddled his waist and palmed him through his pants. He groaned out grabbing the condom.

“You’ve barely seen anyone for years, why do you even have condoms?” You joked.

“Just shut the fuck up and ride me” He rasped out with sweat dripping down his face before his head snapped up towards you. “I-I’m so sorry – I can’t believe I said that. Please forgive me that was so rude I just–”

“Isaac it’s fine, it was hot anyways. Now,” You told him before pulling his pants and underwear down. You tried not to stare as his dick came out but from what you gathered, he was larger than average so that lube will be useful. He then rolled the condom down his length before rubbing some lube on it too.

“Are you ready?” He asked, gripping your hips.

"Yes" You groaned out and lifted your hips above him before slowly sinking down on him, taking him inch by inch. You held onto his shoulders as you kissed, making out with him as you waited for your body to accommodate him. You moaned into his mouth and he did the same as you rocked your hips a bit before settling into a rhythm and moving up and down on him. He held your hips and used them as leverage to thrust up into you meeting you halfway as he hit your sweet spot again and again. The room was filled with the sound of flesh slapping together and your joint moaning as you both got hotter and picked up the pace.

He thrusted harder and you tried to push in as much as you could and teetering on the edge of climax you were pushed fully after Isaac reached his hand down and pleasured your sex causing you to tighten around him as your back arched and you cried out in pleasure. He continued to buck into you as you rode out your orgasm once again and after you bit his neck in that same sensitive spot, he came hard slowly stopping his movements.

The two of you took a few moments to calm down from your highs but eventually, you lifted off him and crashed into bed for a few moments. Isaac was the first to get up and use the bathroom and he helped encourage you to get up and use it too. While you were refreshing you came back to Isaac cleaning the mess made, he wiped down your sheets and set them neatly before lying down. Once you came in he beckoned you towards him and you laid down next to him. You spent the next few moments in silence as you traced over his chest and face, the scar he got years ago and his calloused hands. He was gorgeous. Eventually, you turned to your side and Isaac followed after putting his arm over you and putting his face in your neck and hair, listening to your soft breath before the two of you fell asleep.

– – – – – – –

Warmth was something Isaac barely woke up to in the mornings, but today had been the second time in a row that he felt something warm and completely tranquil next to him in bed.

He told himself he'd get up in 5 minutes but when those 5 minutes came he refused, telling himself he’d get up after another 2 minutes instead. When those came around, he went for an extra 3 minutes but the cycle continued. He stayed for an extra 30 minutes snuggled into your back and warmth.