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“I’m… home..” Collei reluctantly said aloud.
The deep wood green floor creaked oddly, tracing her footsteps. She started to dash to the kitchen, throwing her leather messenger bag to the couch. There was a pleasant smell coming from the kitchen and one Collei was very familiar with. Comfort food. She hoped to see Amber’s “Hang Gliding Champion Steak!” on the table, sizzling fresh as it glistened alongside the oozing juices from the meat. Ahh, how delicious, she thought. It is only a piece of meat, but truthfully its Collei’s favorite thing in the world beside Amber herself.
Clang!
The sound shattered Collei’s daydreaming, she shaked her head and continued to peek over the kitchen door. Amber and her grandfather was there near the kitchen counter, they seem to having some sort of conversation but what broke? and why did it break? Curious, Collei tiptoed to hide behind the fridge, located left of the counter.
“Why would you break that? That was our carnival photo!” Amber exclaimed in disappointment “Grandpa, don’t be unreasonable, I know that you’re upset but Collei deserves to stay here. She— she has nowhere to go and I don’t know what will happen to her if—”
“Nonsense! She doesn’t! Neither is she deserving of your love Amber. You deserve to invest your love and time in other people rather than that… disgusting child.” Amber’s grandpa fumed, burrows furrowing deeper.
He scoffed “I mean look at her! She looks like she brings a lot of trouble to others, nothing meant to be other than a burden itself.”
“You have no right to call her disgusting!" Amber yelled as her voice curdled with anger.
"She isn’t any of the things you claim to say, she deserves my love. You don’t have the right to say those things to her!”
Her grandfather took a deep breath and shook his head “Amber, listen to me. I am your grandfather, I know better than you do and I tell you that the filthy kid should leave this house immediately!”
“Dispose of her by tomorrow. Make sure she doesn’t come home here. I am getting sick of looking at her and pretending to be nice to that stupid brat!”
Collei only stood there behind the kitchen door, eyes empty and gloom. She had a hunch that she was a burden. She had a hunch that she was unworthy. She had a hunch that she shouldn't have entered their lives. It was a hunch, but it is now the truth.
“So…” Collei's eyes swelled with tears, a little invisible since she tilted her head downwards.
Amber’s eyes widened as the terror gradually showed on her face. She went pale, it was as if Collei was a ghost. Her grandfather scorned, rolling his eyes, avoiding eye contact with Collei.
“You think I’m a burden? and that I might be a hassle to… Amber?” Hiccuping as the tears started to trickle down her face. She drooped down. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry that I’ve caused all of this. Because of me you had to pretend to be nice to me. I’m sorry.. I should’ve known better that a lowly person like me doesn’t belong here. I’m so sorry I have wasted both you and Amber’s time. I should’ve known, its always my fault. Always."
Collei paused briefly and picked herself up from the floor, head still tilted downwards not even daring to look at Amber or her grandfather.
"I understand, I-I’ll get going now.”
“Wait no, Collei, you've got it all—”
Collei didnt listen. She dashed out of the kitchen and made a quick detour to the sofa to picking up her leather messenger bag before heading straight for the door. It was now far away from dusk, the sky had transitioned into darkness and the neighborhood they were in were poorly lit but Collei simply couldn’t care less. She ran and ran and ran, clueless over her final destination or where she would stay tonight but that didn’t matter to her. Her legs only had a single objective: to get as far away from Amber as possible.
But as much as she tried, her legs felt like it was tied by her own guilt and intertwined by shame. Collei wanted to collapse but she couldn’t. She wanted to wail because she knew nobody would even bother to listen.
She just wanted to die. She’d rather die than carry a burden—a burden that is herself.
“Collei!”
She slowly stopped as she heard someone familiar call out her name.
“What are you doing her so late at night? Shouldn’t you be at Amber’s place?”
It was Tighnari. The fox-eared boy always heads home far late into dusk due to his duties as an assistant helping his father in his lab. There are some days that he heads home earlier, some days that he heads home later and some days that he does not head home for quite awhile. He has much accustomed to his schedule and has accepted it as a part of his daily routine.
“Leave.. leave me alone Tighnari.” She whispered in a dull voice, roughly pushing him aside.
“Collei, is something up? You know you can always tell me if something’s wrong right? Like you always do. Whatever it is let’s figure it out toge—”
“Tighnari please, leave yourself out of this. You don’t deserve to waste your time on me, go back home. Just leave me be.” She hissed.
Tighnari cleared his voice and folded his arms “Well I’m not leaving until I’m sure you have somewhere safe to sleep tonight.”
“I’m taking you to my house whether you like it or not. Come on.” He says as he grabs her wrist.
Collei resists. She stood there in silence, petrified.
"hic"
Her eyes were pooling with tears, she had started another downpour. She had shrunk to the ground and refused to lift her head, her arm still glued to Tighnari. The fox-eared boy squatted down to her level. He gently caresses her head, waiting for her to calm down.
“Cry all you want Collei. Cry all you want. But later when you're ready, please tell me what’s going on okay?”
She didn’t utter a single word and slowly nodded
Knock, knock
“Can I come in now?” Tighnari asks
“Mm.” Collei responds shortly
The door creaked open. He kneeled down a little before entering, avoiding the door’s ceiling so that his elongated ears don’t hit it. Tighnari slowly approached the distraught girl, squirming through the small spare bedroom and ushered himself next to Collei who was sitting sagged down on an old wooden bed. She was still silent. There was none of the sweet smile that Tighnari had seen earlier today. Instead her lips curved into a slight frown. Her cheeks were stained with tears, complimented by the red accent on her nose and her puffed up eyes.
“Do you want to tell me now or we wait until tomorrow? Fortunately, its a weekend and aside from some menial things I have to chase, I’m practically free. But again, its your choice. Take all the time that you need, I’ll adjust myself either way.” He tells Collei softly.
Tighnari was met with silence. His gaze slightly shifted to Collei. She sat there still as a statue of seven. Perhaps she just needs my company? He thought.
“Why…" Collei responded softly, breaking the silence.
"Why is Amber so kind to me? Why are you so kind to me?”
“I’m not— I’m not worth your time, Tighnari. Like you said you- you have some things you need to do right? Do that ins—”
“Apologies, but I’m going to have to cut you right there.”
“Collei, I’ve said this to you multiple times and I’m willing to say it again. It’s not true that you are a waste of my time nor Amber’s. If you were a waste of my time, I wouldn’t even consider to greet you earlier. I would’ve just ignored you and headed home, but I didn’t right? I chased after you. That’s clear proof that you are worth of my time and is deserving of my full attention.”
“But what about Amber? Her grandfather told her that she should be looking after someone else, anyone else but me. I’m just a burden to her.”
“That was not Amber’s personal opinion of you, that was her grandfather’s. So does it reflect Amber’s? Absolutely not. Does it even matter? Don’t even consider it. Dare I say, its bullshit. Tell me, do you recall Amber defending you?”
Collei’s head immediately shifted over to Tighnari’s direction. Her expression paints the epiphany on her face.
He’s right, Amber wanted me to stay. Amber told him that I was deserving of her love. I was so hinged over her grandpa’s words that it completely overshadowed her words.
Tighnari sighed in relief as he folded his arms “Judging by your face, I’m pretty sure you have the answer don’t you?”
“Yeah… yeah! I think I do.” Collei said confidently
Tighnari plasters a warm expression on his face and fuzzes Collei’s hair “I’m proud of you.”
Bzzzz Bzzzz Bzzzzz
Tighnari’s phone buzzed in his pocket.
“Hello? Oh! Hi Amber, yes yes! She’s in my house. Ah— apologies that was negligence on my part. I forgot that the bell hasn't been working for days. Stay put, I’ll be right with you.”
Tighnari ended the call with a beep, stood up and rushed himself downstairs. He accidentally bumps his ears to the door and yelped. His yelp made Collei giggle a little.
Not long after, Collei tattered behind him and headed downstairs to the front door where he could be seen greeting Amber and surprisingly Eula. Amber complained to him in a lighthearted manner, telling how they almost had to wait in his front door till Lord Barbatos himself descends to help them. Tighnari let out a subtle nervous laugh, scratching his head bashfully while apologizing profusely.
As soon as Collei stepped into Amber’s field of vision, she spared no time and embraced Collei into a hug immediately, almost shocking the girl. Her hug was warm, it felt comforting, just like her staple “Hang Gliding Champion Steak!”. There were no words said and yet, Collei felt like she knew exactly what Amber is saying.
You were never a burden and you will always be worth my time. I love you, Collei.
“hic”
Collei once more gasped for air as she sobbed but unlike previously, the tears weren’t stained with her guilt.
“Excuse my manners, but can we please go to my now? I’m pretty sure hogging someone’s doorstep for a hug isn’t very… appropriate.” Eula reminded the two. “Chop, chop. After my place. You’ll be living there until Amber can gather enough money to move out for the both of you. No need to thank me.”
"Does that mean...?" Collei's eyes gleamed with delight
"Yup! From now on, nobody will threat to separate us." Amber exclaimed as she flashed her paper white smile towards Collei. "No matter what happens, I'll always try to be there for you and that's a promise I am willing to keep."
"Pinkie promise?"
Amber intertwined her pinkie finger with Collei
"Pinkie promise!"
"I'll be by your side, always."