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A young boy, clad in the most basic of clothes he could find sits in the back seat of his family car as it pulls up to a fairly suburban home with a large SUV in the driveway. His mother turns around to see him, “This the place?” Normal promptly nods. “Yeah this is definitely it. I’ll be seeing you, mom!”
He moves to step out of the car but his mom stops him, turning over in her seat and putting a hand on his shoulder. “Normally, you know that I’m really proud that you finally made a friend who goes to your school?” Normal grimaces, “Yeah.” “Well Normal it seems like something is finally working for you! You ditched that suit and you actually made a friend. I really don’t want you messing this up for yourself. Remember to use your common sense and don’t do anything too radical, you got that?”
Hearing her pleased tone towards the loss of teeny struck normal like an arrow through the heart but he figured it was all fair. It’s not like it was doing him any good anyways.
He pulls away from his mom’s grasp and steps out of the car, wearing an insincere smile. “Ok mom, I’ll keep that in mind but I REALLY have to get going now!”, rushes out of his mouth before he turns to walk up to the Unworthy family’s door.
Rebecca drives off and Normal sighs deeply as he stands on the front porch, a whole monstrous slurry of emotions churning inside his head and stomach making him feel absolutely sick. He shakes his whole body in preparation to enter, not fully convinced that he’s ready to as the anxiety course through his veins.
“Ok, ok Normal, we are good, we are fine, we are totally normal… We just have to be more chill. I can do that.” Normal takes one more deep breath before ringing the doorbell.
It isn’t long before Normal’s soon to be mentor and costumer, Hermie the Unworthy appears, looking far more casual than usual with him wearing a striped button up and some slacks rather than the colorful suit that he would typically have on. His green hair was also not slicked back today but rather fell all around his face, framing it in a way that Normal found rather charming.
“Helloooo there, my darling mentee! Please, please come in!” Normal did as he requested, Hermie wrapped his arm around Normal’s body as they walked into the well decorated living room and Normal looked around at the fascinating trinkets that lined the many surfaces. Hermie had guided him to a very comfortable couch and then patted a spot on it. “Have a seat, Normally.” And so he did.
“So, Hermie I really am glad that you could do this for me on such short notice, like you really didn't have to do that!”, Normal nervously chuckles out. Hermie, taking a seat next to him, clasps both of his hands together as he dismisses the notion with a carefree tone. “Oh Normal, you should understand that I absolutely relish the opportunity to help a new actor- or I suppose in your case a quite experienced actor.” Normal raises an eyebrow. “Do you mean that or are you just getting into the character of a mentor or something?” Hermie laughs. “Oh Normal, this is a role but if an actor is choosing their own role they will only perform the ones they enjoy. Every role takes at least a little bit from your own soul and my part as your mentor comes from the part of me that genuinely wants to see you succeed.”
Normal chuckles, blushing. “Well, we sure have a long way to go before that happens so let’s get started before this thing gets away from us!”
Before he even knows it Normal ends up in an exceptionally large closet filled with clothes and costumes of all potential varieties. He didn’t even know that people were allowed to have closets this big! Hermie smirks at Normal as he gawks at the room. “So, what do ya think, big shot?” Normal does a double take between hermie and the rest of the closet. “I- Your parents are a lot richer than I thought they would be!” Hermie nods. “Well they are both doctors. I really would expect you to be able to connect the dots on that one.” “I know, I know, just…. Wow.”
After a few seconds of Normal continuing to ogle the closet, Hermie snaps to bring back his attention. “Alright Normally, let’s get down to business. How should we dress you?” Normal pauses for a second. “I just want to look normal, I guess.” Hermie gives him a disapproving finger waggle. “Tsk Tsk Tsk. Normal, I cannot simply make you look normal. We have to think about what normal means.” He looks Normal in the eye, borderline condescendingly. “What does normal mean to you?”
Normal scrunches up his face at this rather complicated question. “...I guess most of the kids at school are normal, right?” Hermie nods. “Yes, yes. That’s a good start but we need to get more specific. What normal people do you understand the best?” “I don’t really understand any of them?? …but I do have a few friends who are more normal than me…” Hermie nods once more, eyes wide. “So if I add equal parts of them together then I should average out to a normal teen, right?”
Whatever idea Hermie was expecting, it certainly wasn’t that. Though shocking it didn’t seem too horrible. After a few seconds of Hermie staring through Normal, Normal started to doubt that what he said was correct. “That is how math works, right??” Hermie snaps out of his thoughtful trance. “Oh, you got the math correct! The idea is a bit of a strange one but I think that I am willing to roll with it.”
Normal begins to grin. “So it’s a good plan?” Hermie gives him a hearty pat on the shoulder. “Absolutely!” He looks out towards the wide array of costuming. “Now, what are we going to wear?”
After a good amount of back and forth and discussing defining traits of all of Normal’s friends He ends up wearing an outfit consisting of cleats, argyle socks, basketball shorts, a heavily defaced Jimmy Buffett shirt, and a decently cool looking pork pie hat. Normal bursts out of the changing area, striking a pose to show Hermie his confidence in this outfit. Hermie grins. “‘Looks great, Normal! But remember what we talked about. A role isn’t just a costume. You need to conduct yourself in a much more lowkey manner. Be more chill, if you will.”
Normal sighs, relaxing his body, though the stress from his body only transferred to his thoughts. He nods, doing his best to appear as “low key” as possible. “Ok, so can I get myself in front of a mirror?” “Oh, of course!” Hermie obliges, pointing him towards a full body mirror.
Normal gets a good look at himself, carefully examining every aspect of his appearance. He found himself mostly content with the outfit but something was… missing. “Hey, Hermie?” “Yes?” “You can do makeup, right?” Hermie laughs, a grin spread wide across his face. “Oh, absolutely! Come here and we can work on some looks for you, ok?”
Continuing with the theme of people Normal knows, he of course decided to do some dark gothy makeup, complete with black lipstick and smudged eyeliner, as Scary is the only friend that he knows to wear makeup.
Once Hermie is done helping Normal put together his new face, Normal takes a good look in the mirror. He didn’t feel good about what he was doing but he couldn’t help but to exude excitement because what he was doing was for the best. This makeup is going to have to work. “I really like it, Herm!” Hermie smiles. “It was no trouble at all! And we got it all done within…” He checks his phone. “Four hours!”
“Four hours?!” Normal exclaims stupidly. He suddenly can feel the effect of hunger starting to wear on his body, his stomach rumbling madly. “Dude, we really need to eat.” “Oh that was the plan! I was planning on having you test out your new role in public! Where do you want to eat, Mr. Normal?” Normal thought about the most normal restaurants he could imagine for a second. “Let’s go to Burger King!” “Great idea! But we will have to walk there.” “I can do that.”
Walking the few streets to Burger King, there was a cool breeze blowing through the air, as if attempting to calm nerves. It admittedly wasn’t working on Normal, who was sweating bullets and looking all around whilst trying to keep his body calm. It’s a decent sized walk, meaning that there was conversation to be had by the two boys.
“So… Apologies for not discussing this back in the house but would it make you feel better to, maybe give your character a name? It helps really personify a role in my experience.” Asked Hermie hesitantly. “Hmm. If.. if that would help I can do that.” “Well, what would the name be?” Normal shrugs vaguely. “Norm… I guess? It’s a normal name for a normal teen.” Hermie nods. “Norm… I like it.”
They eventually arrive at the Burger King and step in line to order. It is only then that Normal realized that he was too busy putting all his focus into acting normal that he completely forgot what he was going to get. Think Norm, think… Just get the most normal thing on the menu! By the time that it was their turn they were both ready to order.
A peppy young woman manning the cashier greeted them. “Good afternoon, what would you two young ladies want for today?” Both incredibly peeved, Hermie just squinted. “Actually we are not ladies and I will take a bacon cheeseburger meal with chicken fries and a mountain dew, if you would please.” The cashier gets that all down before looking towards Normal. “And for you?” Normal froze, anxiety rushing through him. “Uh… can I have uh… a.. A number 1 with a diet coke?”
The cashier nodded. “Is that all for you two?” Hermie looks at Normal expectantly. Hesitantly, Normal stammered out a “Yes” and they took a number and went to go sit down at a booth.
Upon sitting Normal almost immediately lays his head on the table and groans miserably, fighting back tears. Hermie reached across the table to take his hands, attempting to comfort him. “Hey, what’s wrong? If this was too much for a first test we can just take our food to go.” Normal picks his face up so that his chin rests on the table. “This was so easy and I already fucked it uppppp….” Hermie was quick to rebut that, squeezing the hands of the other anxious boy. “Hey, hey, hey, Don’t say that! You just stepped outside of your comfort zone and it is perfectly normal to feel anxious about that. You didn’t “fuck up” anything!”
“That cashier called me a lady! Clearly I'm not doing a good enough job being normal if that’s happening…” Tears began to fall down his face. Noticing this, Hermie rushed to move from sitting across from normal to sitting beside him in the booth so that he could wrap an arm around him and put his face at the same level as Normal’s sobbing one. “Hey, hey look at me. Just look at me here.” Normal does so, his eyes glistening with tears. “There is nothing either of us could do about that. That is just how people are. Now, are we going to stay here and have a good time and eat or are we going to calm down at home, because I am completely fine with either option.”
Normal picked his face up, sniffing and wiping the tears from his eyes. “I’m sorry for that. I want to stay. I promise to act Normal.” Hermie massaged his shoulder with the hand that rested on it. “Only if you’re completely sure.” Normal grabbed his arm and guided it back to the side of Hermie’s body. “Yeah, I can do this. I promise.” Hermie smiled softly. “Ok then.”
Eventually their food got delivered and they ate it whilst having discussions that normal teens have like how they’re failing classes and the school soccer team. Normal really does liven up just casually talking to Hermie over lunch. It’s almost refreshing even, to have a comforting face there to keep him from losing it all. Once they finish their food they dispose of their trays and begin the walk back to the house.
Normal let out a sigh of relief upon exiting the restaurant. Hermie looks towards him inquisitively and asks, “Well, how was it?” Normal chuckles, smiling weakly. “Better than it would have been without you there.” Hermie laughs deviously. “Of course my presence helped, my darling mentee. I’m Hermie the Unworthy, after all.” Normal blushes, also laughing. “Oh shut up!”
They talk quite a bit about just about everything until they get closer to Hermie’s home. There had been a comfortable silence for a few minutes until they got up to the driveway and Normal looked Hermie in the eye and asked,
“Do you really think this will help me save my dad?”
Hermie grimaced, unsure of what to say. “Only if you believe it, Norm. All I can do is believe in you.”
“Well I hope you’re good at it because I sure as hell need somebody to believe in me here.”
“Good. Because I don’t plan on stopping anytime soon.”