Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Soobin remembers it well. It was a beautiful summer day when the five boys were walking together along the Han River. The sun was just setting, which meant that the sky was tinted a beautiful shade of red. In addition, there were no individual clouds in the sky to cover the setting sun. If you looked up at the sky, you could see birds and if you listened carefully, you could hear the leaves of the trees rustling and the grass moving because of a gentle breeze. You didn't need a jacket, but you didn't have to sweat either. It was a perfect temperature for a walk. The boys were in their own world. They sat close together on a picnic blanket. A grin or smile was visible on each face, while their eyes sparkled with joy and hidden love. The hands of these boys sought contact with more hands, bodies shaking as laughter rang out. It was all so peaceful, as if the five boys were the last survivors in this world. As if they were not sitting in a public park, surrounded by more people who were enjoying the beautiful day together just like them. Each of them could hear their own hearts beating faster in their ears, but also the promise of being together forever kept repeating in the boys' heads, like someone putting their favourite song on loop. Remembering this, Soobin couldn't help but smile. They were young, naïve and just inexperienced to know that such a thing was not possible for everyone. After all, he now sits alone, separated from the people he had promised his eternal love. His heart broken, his eyes swollen while dried tear marks can be seen on his cheek. Of course, it didn't happen abruptly overnight. No, it was like a slow burn you could witness in any romance when the heroine was too stupid to understand her own feelings. He certainly could have prevented it, but the process would have brought more tears and heartache than the present situation. Soobin was very sure about that.

TXT consisted of three alphas and two omegas. Soobin was the pack alpha while the two other alphas were Yeonjun and Taehyun. Huening Kai and Beomgyu were the Omegas of the group. They were a pack but had talked about it and decided that they would not mark each other. Beomgyu and Kai were both too young to take on the role of the pack mom.

No one had a problem with that. However, the emphasis is on had. Now all the members were sitting together on the floor in the living room. The temperature was not perfect, as it was on this one summer day. Taehyun and Beomgyu had each snuggled up in a blanket while the rest reached for a hoodie. Also, the room was not accompanied by a warm but beautiful shade of red, but a harsh light from the LED lamp hanging over the boys' heads. On top of that, not a single sound could be heard. There was a stifling silence spread throughout the room. Soobin was sure that this silence could have been cut in half with a pair of scissors. The ticking of the clock could also be clearly heard, making it clear to the boys that their time would not stop, no matter how much they asked for it. Everyone was on edge. Soobin nervously licked his lips, which suddenly seemed so dry. Huening Kai played with the hoodie's ribbons between his fingers. Beomgyu bit at the skin around the nail. Taehyun's eyes could not focus while his hands clawed tightly into fabric of his shorts. Yeonjun kept running his fingers through his hair, his fingers on his knee tapping out a restless rhythm that made no sense. As the silence slowly became too much for Soobin, he slowly cleared his throat. His throat was uncharacteristically dry, but he couldn't remember what he was going to say, even though he had been repeating the sentences in his head just a moment ago. "So," he started slowly but carefully, "Taehyun marked Kai and at the same or similar time Beomgyu marked Yeonjun ?". As he let his gaze wander after his statement, none of the members could look him in the eye. Beomgyu swallowed loudly and Kai took a deep but also loud breath. Soobin could clearly see that each of them felt guilty, but his own heart hurt more. He was disappointed and sad but at the same time angry. They had promised each other. With one hand he stroked through his hair. Once again he let his tongue glide over his dry lips. He tilted his head and began to speak once more, "And this happened while I was with my parents for the last two days ?". You could clearly hear how upset he was. Soobin didn't want to sugar coat the whole thing either. He wanted to reveal his feelings to the boys whom he loved and trusted very much, but none dared to explain themselves. Disappointed by this statement, he shook his head, which began to throb with pain. With a quick movement, he stood up. Taehyun reached for his wrist with a firm grip, but his expression was very uncertain, as if he didn't know if he was even allowed to reach for it anymore. Beside him, Kai grumbled, clearly fewling the younger man's feelings, but Soobin yanked his wrist out of his grip with force. Without looking them in the face again, he walked, if not almost sprinted, to his room. The whole building heard Soobin's door slamming loudly into the lock. You could also hear the loud slam against that wooden door the pack alpha had been leaning against a moment before. The boys, left in the living room, flinched. However, that was not the moment that broke Soobin's heart. He was pissed because he felt left behind. But after a few days, the members were able to come together and on the same day they lay cuddled together on the floor in the living room, which was prepared with blankets and pillows. Soobin in the middle, while the other boys snuggled around him.

Soobin's heart did not break in two in one day. No, it broke into several pieces when he was rejected by each member. It is not that he immediately takes everything to heart. It's just that he clearly noticed the growing distance between himself and the members too late.

The first time he felt this growing distance was with Yeonjun, who he knew he could trust with his worries and grief, even if they were exaggerated or unnecessary. Both of them always sat cuddled up together in each other's arms as they talked to each other in a calm and quiet voice after a busy day. There was a blanket around both of them, covering their bodies completely. It was always so cosy and warm, which is why they both usually fell asleep afterwards. When Yeonjun fell asleep before him, Soobin would watch the older man's relaxed face. His full lips were slightly parted, and his breath brushed Soobin's face, but he didn't mind. The long lashes rested on his slightly rosy cheeks. If Soobin was brave enough, he dared to touch them gently with his fingertips. As he did so, Yeonjun's hair framed his face. In Soobin's eyes, he always looked like an angel fallen from heaven. The pack leader had to grin at the thought. He couldn't help his excited giggle that sounded like he was about to confess love to his crush, placing his hands on his cheeks, which turned rosy. His heart beat loudly in his ears, but at the same time a nice warmth spread through his chest. With hurried and large steps, he ran towards the elder's room. He raised his hand, which he clenched in a fist, to tap gently against the wood. Excitedly, he bit his lower lip. A smile graced his face as he did so, but it quickly disappeared from his expression. The elder looked annoyed. His tongue was pressed against the inside of his cheek, arms folded in front of his chest and his posture clearly tense. Soobin anxiously placed a hand on the other man's upper arm and was about to start inquiring about the alphas's well-being when Yeonjun interrupted him. The alpha snapped at him, "What? Surprised, Soobin had to swallow. Yeonjun's eyes were very intense and one could see a clear fire behind them. A little overwhelmed by this, the leader stumbled over his words, "I wanted to talk to you," he had to swallow briefly, "... you know about the usual-". He then pressed his lips together as Yeonjun frowned in annoyance. As he did so, he raised a hand, massaging his fingers against his forehead. Soobin had pissed him off even more than thhe older one already was, but he doesn't know why Yeonjun reacted like that. The latter had to take one deep breath in and out, "Look Soobin, you're old enough to know that all your 'worries' are kindergarten. I have no more desire or nerve to repeat the same thing over and over again ! If you want someone to do it, find your own omega or act like the alpha you are ! Even Taehyun can do it better than you !". The elder grew louder with each sentence until at the end he was gasping a little out of breath. Soobin could clearly see the pulsating vein on his forehead. His eyes became watery, so Yeonjun slowly put his hand over his mouth in shock. Everything then happened far too quickly. Yeonjun wanted to reach for him and pull him into his arms, but Soobin only wanted to leave. The thought of being in the older man's arms after those words made him see red, so he pushed him away. He was stronger, and he knew it, but at that moment he could not control his strength. Yeonjun sat on the floor in shock, next to him the next moment was a worried Beomgyu while Soobin was grabbed by the collar by Taehyun who clearly looked angry. But Soobin wrenched himself from Taehyun's grip and disappeared into his own room in the next instant. Once there, he threw himself onto his bed. With one hand he pulled the blanket over him and lingered down there for the rest of the day. Over the next few days, he could not get close to Yeonjun as Taehyun prevented him each time, until it became a habit that behind the camera, Soobin had little to no contact with the Eldest and Second Youngest.

This was followed by a growing distance with Huening Kai. Both were known to be attached to each other like chewing gum. Nothing could come between the two but themselves. After a tiring day, Soobin sought the comfort of the youngest as he could no longer exchange words with Yeonjun. But every time Soobin got too close to him, the younger one avoided him. As if Soobin's touches were hurting him, burning or etching deep into his skin. Now they all sat in front of the camera as they started a live for the fans. The members sat on a small couch, which is why they all had to cuddle up to each other. Actually not a big problem, but Huening Kai pressed himself much closer to Taehyun than he had to. This created a clearly visible gap between him and Soobin. The leader didn't even try to close this gap, still hurt from the previous rejections. He watched himself and the others through the tablet that was on the table in front of him. He bit his lower lip at the sight, his legs bobbing rapidly and nervously as his eyes glazed over. Out of the corner of his eye he saw fans asking if everything was all right. Nothing was all right at all. He couldn't fake it anymore either. With a hasty movement, he stood up. This drew all eyes to him, but he could not muster the strength to explain himself. Thanks to his long legs, he was able to leave the room with long strides. Soobin needed time for himself to reflect and think. When he looked at the other he didn't feel the same spark. He only felt cold and lonely as if they always only had been co-workers.

When they arrived home, there was a tense tension. Taehyun and Yeonjun quickly left the living room, and so did Beomgyu. Kai wanted to try too, but he was grabbed by the wrist by the pack leader. The younger man made himself smaller by pulling his shoulders up to his head and leaning away from the older man. The sight hurt Soobin. He exhaled shakily and let go of Huening Kai's hand. He ran his now free hand through his hair and his tongue moistened his lips. In a weak voice he began to speak, "Have I done something wrong ? ... You've been avoiding me all day". As if he was caught, the maknae flinched in front of him like he were a deer in headlights. Disappointed, but also hurt, Soobin had to sigh loudly, when the younger one in front of him wanted to start explaining himself, he only raised his flat hand. He shook his head, mumbling under his breath that Kai should leave it and that he would now disappear into his room. Just as he said it, he did so. With a heavy heart, he couldn't take the words the younger man would have said to him.

-♡ At the same day ♡-

Soompi ✓

Fans show great concern for the leader of boy group TXT after he stormed out of the room during today's livestream.

-♡-

The distancing with Beomgyu happened quite naturally, as if they were two friends who had lost sight of each other, but that cannot happen. They live together and work together. They see each other every day whether they want to or not, but the younger one was good at disappearing when Soobin was looking for him. Bored, Soobin opened Weverse and clicked on the solo live stream that Beomgyu had started. This one was in his studio, which was why he couldn't drop by directly. He missed the boys, but there was nothing he could do either. Soobin tried his best not to let the boys out of his sight, but he knew that his beloved pack could do well without him. They did not miss him, nor did they long for him. As the pack leader thought about it like this, he noticed how he was the only one trying to chase after this hopeless love. Startled, he looked at his phone when he heard his name and had to blink away his tears to see clearly. Beomgyu was answering a question that seemed to concern the leader. But the words the younger man uttered left a bitter aftertaste on Soobin's tongue. He talked about how he couldn't find his way to his elder at the moment and that the other members felt the same way. Beomgyu shrugged his shoulders and tried to explain to the fans as if it was Soobin's fault. As if Soobin was just going through a rough patch without seeking help. He also seemed to be pushing the members away. With shaky breathing, he put his phone on her side. He reached for a pillow and put it over his face then he screamed painfully into it. His heart shattered into thousands of pieces. It felt like someone was crushing it with their bare hands, throwing it on the floor and stepping on it. Bitterly he cried all night.

-♡ at the same day ♡-

Soompi ✓

Fans of the boy group "TXT" are concerned about the relationship between the members. Fans express their concern about a possible break-up.

-♡-

Due to this sleepless night, he seriously injured his back during the rehearsal. He wasn't paying attention and fell from a higher level stage onto his back. At the moment he had his eyes squeezed tightly shut as it felt like someone was throwing several knives into his back, slowly rolling onto his side to avoid being on his back any further. He tried to smell the comforting smells of his pack members, so he could calm down, but no one was around until a staff found him. Everything then happened far too quickly. Soobin was taken by ambulance to hospital, where he was examined to find that he had a spinal injury. His manager and the doctor tried to explain to him as gently as possible that he would not be able to participate in the promotion for a long period of time until he had fully recovered. But a world shattered for him at that moment. The boys he loved most no longer loved him, and now he could no longer do the job he loved. Now he sat crying wide awake at night because none of the members came to see him either.

-♡ one day later ♡-

Soompi ✓

Hybe Label released a statement about TXT's Soobin's break after he injured his back during rehearsal. Fans shouldn't worry, but unfortunately they cannot say how long the recovery will take.
Until then, the group continues to promote with the other members.

-♡-

Even then, the members didn't visit him. There was an oppressive radio silence. Soobin was depressed and just heartbroken. After his stay in the hospital for 1 month, he was brought home to his parents. There he was told to rest so that he could fully recover. However, he couldn't enjoy the time there with his broken heart. Every night he lay motionless in his bed. Again and again he sobbed quietly behind his hand while hot tears rolled down his cheeks. He just couldn't take it anymore. Every day the sun was shining, the birds were chirping, but he felt empty, as if his heart was missing. He went on like this for 3 more months until he decided to call his manager.

-♡ 4 months after the injury ♡-

Fans of boy group TXT enjoyed new selfies of TXT's Soobin after his back injury however they are still very worried as the tweet sounds like a goodbye.

-♡ 2 days later ♡-

Hybe Label releases a statement that TXT's leader Soobin is leaving the group and that he has parted ways with the members.
TXT will continue to promote with 4 members.

-♡ 4 days later ♡-

Fans of the boy group TXT are shocked about the behaviour of the members after TXT's leader Soobin left the group.

-♡ 6 months later ♡-

Soompi ✓

A fan of the boy group TXT posted a selfie with the group's former leader Soobin. The fan commented that Soobin now works in a small bakery after recovering from his injury.

-♡ 4 months later ♡-

Soompi ✓

Ateez's member Seonghwa announces his wedding to a non celebrity alpha.

-♡ 2 months later ♡-

Soompi ✓

Ateez Seonghwa will appear with his husband on Variety's show "In Love, Engaged, Married".
Fans speculate that the husband is the former leader of the group TXT.

-♡ release day of the episode ♡-

Fans' speculation proves to be true. Ateez's Seonghwa's husband is Choi Soobin.
The couple will appear as permanent members with breaks.

Chapter Text

There was no day that Beomgyu didn't roll in the bed of the former Pack Alpha. He clutched the pillow and lifted it to his nose. The smell of cinnamon and hot chocolate faded more and more with each passing month, but it still smelled like the same day to him. Perhaps Beomgyu imagined the smell, just as he dreams almost every day of Soobin suddenly appearing at the door. Once again, salty tears rolled down his cheeks and with that, Beomgyu knew it was time to leave the room. With heavy steps, he pulled the door shut behind him. He leaned against the wooden door and took a deep breath before drying his cheeks and going back to his room.

Since Soobin had left the pack, all the members had felt the same. At first, they hadn't even noticed any differences. The separation had felt like a gentle breeze, but the longer time passed, the stormier it became. As if they had to hold on to a railing to keep from flying away. Meanwhile, there was a loud thunderstorm in their heads, or it was just their noisy thoughts that they couldn't shake. They all assumed that they had lost their love for him, but the day the pack bound broke, each member was miserable. Still, they couldn't process all this and tried to carry on in front of fans as if nothing had happened. Fans had nevertheless expressed great anger and sadness. The break-up wasn't only difficult for the members, but also for the fans.
Huening Kai remembers it very well. He was lying in his bed with a bunny stuffed animal pressed against him. A black bunny with big brown eyes. Unconsciously, Kai pressed it tighter against him. Soobin also had big brown eyes, but they disappeared when he smiled. Oh, how the youngest missed this smile. He also missed the warmth spreading through his chest when the elder smiled at him. Frustrated, he sighed loudly, his breath shaking as he let it out. Huening Kai threw the rabbit against the door of his room and pulled the covers over himself. A few minutes later, he was sitting on his knees in front of the stuffed toy, sobbing quietly. He was cold that night.

Of course, the members had a serious talk with the CEO and the managers of the group. It wasn't nice to know that a member was leaving the group because he was no longer welcome. The staff members who were good friends with Soobin left their job bit by bit. But some stayed, even if the relationship with the members was no longer the same. There are days when everyone is very tense, even though nothing has happened. Soobin's calm aura was lacking in the team dynamic. Nevertheless, the crew also saw themselves to blame. They could see the members distancing themselves from him, but they ignored it. All the pairs were arguing, but still they should have offered an open ear. One of the managers still had to think about when he had explained to Soobin that he was not allowed to perform for a long time. He could clearly observe when the alpha's world simply shattered in his eyes.
Taehyun can still remember exactly how his heart began to beat faster when he saw the picture of his ex-partner on Twitter. Round cheeks that were rosy. Brown eyes that sparkled even when they were almost closed because of the wide smile. How deep his dimples looked. Soobin looked healthy and happy, while Taehyun was just the opposite. Because he didn't eat properly, his cheeks had shrunk. Even with make-up, it was difficult to cover his dark circles. Fans also noticed that Taehyun just lost touch with the world since Soobin was gone. He lacked the safe anchor, the retreat he needed, in the form of the former pack alpha. With a fingertip, he slowly stroked the screen of his photo. He had to smile a little. Of course, he wouldn't feel the same warmth as if he were actually touching Soobin. Three days later, Taehyun was trending on Twitter because of his new phone.
When Soobin's father and brother arrived at the front door, the boys knew they had no chance. In one day, all the belongings were collected by the former leader of the group and taken away. Not a single item of clothing was left behind, except for the hidden hoodies in the omegas' closets. All that was left behind was furniture, like the bed or the desk, which had collected enough dust over these months.

Yeonjun did know after that day that he would probably never face Soobin again. Still, his heart tightened when he saw the man he loved happily with someone else. His alpha yowled and growled inside him as he saw Soobin hugging another omega. He closed his eyes after turning off the TV. Yeonjun buried his face in his hands. He blinked away hot tears as images swirled around in his head. Scenarios he had imagined before all this happened. He had imagined himself on one knee in front of the younger man, ring in hand. Just as he had imagined himself nervously waiting at the altar for the younger alpha, but it was all slowly fading. Soobin was married and looked happier than he ever had with the other four boys.

Still, Beomgyu desperately grabbed the older man's hand as he walked past him. Beomgyu knew Soobin wasn't there for them, but to see his husband, nevertheless he couldn't let go. Not again did he want to do this. Kai felt the same way when he took the alpha's other hand. His lower lip quivered. Crying was not something he actually often did, but it was slowly becoming a habit. Still, Taehyun couldn't take his eyes off the former pack alpha as he slowly walked away from the group. His heart ached as the silhouette grew smaller and then disappeared. Yeonjun pulled the others along by the hand. Even though he would like to cry and scream, throw himself on the ground like a child and kick his legs until he got what he wanted, he had to be strong. Someone had to be, after they themselves had lost their anchor. Unfortunately, none of the four boys could cheer when the latest news about Soobin came out. Even though the four were in a relationship, they felt more than lonely.

Soompi

Ateez's Seonghwa and his husband announce the happy news of having pups.