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“Why are you looking up the coordinates to Uncle Bob’s Fantanamaland?” Lu Xu’s voice floats over.
Hongjun immediately slams the navigation interface shut, and turns around so his body is blocking the screen. “I—why can’t I look at Uncle Bob’s Fantanamaland?”
Lu Xu crosses his arms. “Because it’s a godawful tourist trap of a planet that has a cult of positivity and wholesomeness around it.”
“….but it also has a the galaxy’s biggest Winter Fest celebration, and I’ve never even gotten to go to the Griivar Systems because Die thought it was cheesy dumb,” Hongjun muffles, looking down at his boots.
Lu Xu sighs as he purses his lips. “It is cheesy and dumb. Wait—do you want to do this as some kind of cheesy love confession to the captain—”
“Shh!” Hongjun hisses, blocking Lu Xu’s mouth with both of his hands.
Lu Xu rolls his eyes and shoves Hongjun off of him. “What are you shushing me for? Aren’t you two basically married?”
(…technically yes, because bizarrely enough, in the system where Hongjun had actually met Li Jinglong in, defeating someone in a space battle makes the two of you automatically legally married.
He hadn’t been a huge fan of it at the time to find out that he was effectively the husband of this space cop who was then promoted to be his captain, but after living on this ship with him, working together on various cases, from lost cats to astral foxes wanting to assassinate emperors, and going to hot springs planets together—
Well, he may kind of have a crush now.
And—
He doesn’t think it’s hopeless, because Jinglong always seems softer around him these days as well!
Jinglong even went with him to visit his home planet and see his parents !
…not that that visit went especially well, particularly when Die found out that he had gotten married and hadn’t even told him, but at least Baba and Mama had calmed him down eventually and prevented him from throwing Jinglong off a mountain.
If that didn’t scare Jinglong off, probably nothing will, so he just needs to find the right moment to confess.)
“But we haven’t made anything official yet, so don’t jinx it!” Hongjun says, pushing at Lu Xu.
Lu Xu snorts. “I don’t see why you just don’t ask for some supplies from Ashina Qiong, sneak into Li Jinglong’s quarters, and surprise him.”
“Because that turned out so well when you did that with Mo Rigen,” Hongjun mutters.
Lu Xu scowls and puts Hongjun into a headlock. “I thought we agreed that we weren’t going to talk about it!” he says, noogying Hongjun’s head.
Hongjun breaks out of his grasp to noogie Lu Xu’s head right back. “You were the one who brought it up!”
“I did not—”
“Tangentially! And you should really go talk to Gen-ge again about it—I think this is all just a big misunderstanding!” Hongjun says earnestly. “I know he cares about you a lot—”
“Yeah, as a bro,” Lu Xu scoffs.
“He still slept with you,” Hongjun points out.
“And regretted it the next day!” Lu Xu fires back, running a hand through his long hair. “No, I’m done with big dumb wolves. I’m never ever listening to him again—”
“Gunner channel, gunner channel, to battle stations, to battle stations,” Mo Rigen’s voice rings out through the intercom of the ship.
Hongjun and Lu Xu share a glance before darting off to their various gunner stations, Hongjun activating the communicator in his ear. “What are we looking at?”
“Looks like some proldiers think we’re easy targets,” Li Jinglong’s voice comes over the comms. “They’re about to find out that they made one of the worst decisions of their lives.”
“En!” Hongjun agrees happily, powering up his Pentacolor laser gatling gun while he hears the clicks of Lu Xu getting his massive laser cannon ready as well.
“Hey, Lu Xu,” Mo Rigen clears his throat over the comms, “I—”
“You can jump into a black hole, Mo Rigen,” Lu Xu snaps, slamming the buttons of the cannon together with enough force that Hongjun just knows Lu Xu is imagining Mo Rigen’s face there.
“I was about to say, on your left,” Mo Rigen says meekly.
Lu Xu curses and immediately blasts the incoming ship with his laser cannon, blazing through their shields. Meanwhile, Mo Rigen stabilizes their own shields, and Hongjun is quickly sniping down all incoming drones, and he can hear A-Tai over the comms trying to get in contact with the other ship.
“This is The Exorcist , and if you’re not some kind of eldritch abomination, we really don’t have to be fighting right now!”
“Dump all your cargo overboard right now, and we’ll stop shooting!”
“Our gunners seem to outgunning yours, and I know our ship can outmaneuver yours,” Li Jinglong says calmly.
To punctuate his point, Hongjun neatly finishes off all incoming drones, then snipes out one of the opposing ships’ laser cannons and chirps, “All clear, captain!”
“As I was saying,” Li Jinglong says, his voice pleased. “We have excellent gunners, and my sniper is both the best and the cutest.”
Hongjun blushes in pleasure while Lu Xu snaps, “Tell them to hurry up and surrender so we don’t have to listen to the captain and sniper flirting any more over the comms. So unprofessional.”
“I think it’s fun!” Ashina Qiong’s cheerful voice rings out over the comms. “It’s a cute contrast to the drama-panic you and Mo Rigen have going on, but no less entertaining!”
“Ashina Qiong, I’m going to kill you,” Lu Xu says darkly.
“No intra-crew murder,” Li Jinglong intervenes. “A-Tai would have to avenge him, and then the entire engagement present I prepared for you and Mo Rigen will be wasted.”
“What? Captain, you don’t think I can take Lu Xu?” Ashina Qiong demands.
“I think Lu Xu is very scary when angered, especially when he has a shovel in hand,” Li Jinglong says solemnly.
“I would never bet against Lu Xu,” Mo Rigen adds.
Hongjun glances over at Lu Xu with those words, giving him an encouraging smile.
Lu Xu simply glowers at him with a face that screams I’m not buying it!
(If only there was some way to both force Mo Rigen to realize that with how many times he’s slept with Lu Xu at this point, he really can’t be straight, and to also force Lu Xu to just be the tiniest bit less tsundere…
Surely the Fantanamaland Winter Fest will help with that too!
He’s heard that it’s very, very romantic, with floating lights, singing animatronic birds, android musicians, and firework shows!
Even Lu Xu and Mo Rigen’s boneheadness can’t stand in the way of all that!
…he’ll have to watch over them to make sure though, because they’re so bad at talking to one another.
But he also has to figure out the best way to confess to Jinglong!
Ugh, the things he does for Lu Xu, he swears…
Maybe Ashina Qiong will have some ideas.)
--
Ashina Qiong’s ideas mostly involve bondage and aphrodisiacs, but Hongjun doubts that more confused sleeping together will be helpful in Lu Xu and Mo Rigen’s case, so he decides to consult Qiu Yongsi and A-Tai instead.
(Qiu Yongsi has two paramours, and A-Tai is married, so they probably have some ideas between the two of them?)
“Ah, we should tell Mo Rigen to buy Lu Xu a really nice Winter Fest gift!” Qiu Yongsi says, checking their coordinates on the sat-nav. “Speaking of which, if we’re going to be in the Griivar Systems then, I can’t not take Du Hanqing to Uncle Bob’s Fantanamaland, he’ll cry.”
“What about the Ghost King?” Hongjun asks curiously.
Qiu Yongsi winks at him. “He may not be super into it, but he’ll come if both me and Hanqing are there.”
“But if we leave it to Mo Rigen to buy Lu Xu a gift, he’ll get him something entirely unromantic, like new boots or something,” A-Tai comments, tapping his fan against his hand. “Maybe he should do Operation Jealousy: flirt with some other guy to make Lu Xu jealous and actually say his feelings clearly for once!”
“I think Lu Xu would just bash him over the head with his shovel and run away,” Hongjun says honestly. “Also, last time you tried Operation Jealousy on Turandohkt, she was terrifying. ”
A-Tai pulls at his collar. “Ah, yes, that was truly a mistake—but the making up for it was delightful! Anyway—you’re right. Perhaps the other way around then? If Lu Xu flirts with some strapping young man, then maybe Mo Rigen will finally realize that his confused feelings are very much not platonic…”
“Maybe, but I’ve never seen Lu Xu flirt with anyone before,” Hongjun says doubtfully. “I feel like Lu Xu’s idea of flirting is insulting someone, and I don’t want to get kicked out of Fantanamaland before I get to see all the exhibits, let alone the parade and the fireworks…”
“What’s this about Lu Xu flirting with someone?” Li Jinglong asks, walking over.
Hongjun immediately straightens up, smiling at Li Jinglong. “Just that Lu Xu is more likely to run someone through with his words than flirt cutely with them to make Mo Rigen jealous!”
“Hmm…you’re right, although I’m not sure if Mo Rigen would be able to read that as Lu Xu trying to flirt with someone and get jealous accordingly,” Li Jinglong muses, glancing over at the nav screens. “Why are we plotting a course to the Griivar Systems.”
“Hongjun here wants to do Winter Fest at Uncle Bob’s Fantanamaland!” Qiu Yongsi says, clapping both hands on Hongjun’s shoulders from behind, a teasing lilt to his voice. “I hear it’s very romantic~~~”
As Hongjun shrugs Qiu Yongsi off and shoots an annoyed glance at him (Jinglong is going to know because Jinglong is so smart, and Hongjun doesn’t even really have a plan yet!), Li Jinglong strokes his chin as he looks at the screen and then over at the dent in the wall where Lu Xu had been trying to kneecap Mo Rigen after the last time they had slept together. “…it’s not a bad idea. Maybe what the two of them need is a change in scenery—a romantic winter festival can’t hurt, even if it’s heavily commercialized and too family friendly.”
Hongjun pouts. “I thought it looked really fun! They have all sorts of animals and different species from all over the galaxy, ancient Terran artifacts, top of the line androids, and they say no one can top their shows no matter what system you’re in.”
“They certainly have the money for that,” Li Jinglong says dryly, smiling at him and reaching out to rub his head. “Well, we do have some time off. I thought I could treat everyone to some hot springs again, but if everyone wants to head to the Griivar Systems, far be it from me to deny that request.”
Hongjun nods and then shoots looks at Qiu Yongsi and A-Tai, trying to convey through just his eyes that they better agree!
Qiu Yongsi just laughs and types at the screen, “Well, Du Hanqing is already in, and if he’s in, the Ghost King will soon follow…”
“I’m sure Turandohkt will like it, she was just complaining that she wants to visit a new system,” A-Tai comments, also typing. “And I know Qiong will like it, he’ll probably sweep all the carnival games…”
“Carnival games?” Lu Xu demands, walking in, glancing at Hongjun and then at Li Jinglong. “Oh no—do we really have to go to Uncle Bob’s Fantanamaland?”
“Yes!” Hongjun chirps, giving Lu Xu a smug glance. “You’re going to have fun, whether you think it’s lame or not!”
“It’s so lame,” Lu Xu groans, glaring at Li Jinglong. “I can’t believe you let Hongjun bat his big eyes at you and convince you to go.”
“What can I say, I love cute things,” Li Jinglong says blandly, grinning over at Hongjun.
(See?
It’s things like that that make Hongjun think that he has a chance.
It’s pretty promising, right?
It’s not too soon to maybe buy a ring?
…that’s maybe still too soon, but still!)
Lu Xu looks distinctly constipated, and looks only more so when Mo Rigen comes in and sees the map on the screen. “Oh hey, the Griivar Systems! Do we have time to stop by Uncle Bob’s Fantanamaland too? I’ve never been, and I hear it’s really fun.”
Lu Xu throws up his hands. “Why is everyone that I like like this?”
Mo Rigen blinks as he glances over at Lu Xu shyly. “…you like me?”
Lu Xu looks as though he’s about five seconds away from throwing Qiu Yongsi’s nearby mug at Mo Rigen’s head, so Hongjun quickly intervenes (Yongsi-ge loves that mug and it does not deserve to be collateral damage!). “Of course Lu Xu likes you platonically! And romantically! Not just sexually, Gen-ge!”
“You—!” Lu Xu turns red and attempts to grab Hongjun, but Hongjun quickly darts away, sticking his tongue out at Lu Xu.
Mo Rigen is also a bit more flushed than before, rubbing his face. “Oh—really?”
“No!” Lu Xu yells as he pushes past Mo Rigen and stomps out of the navigation room.
Mo Rigen just looks completely baffled, and both A-Tai and Qiu Yongsi pat him on the shoulder. Li Jinglong just shakes his head and says ruefully, “Well. More time to grow Lu Xu’s dowry, I guess, before I hand him over to you, Mo Rigen.”
“I don’t—I really don’t get him,” Mo Rigen sighs, rubbing the back of his neck. “I also don’t—”
“If you say one more time that you see him like a little brother, I’m going to hand Lu Xu his shovel to hit you with,” Hongjun interrupts, crossing his arms. “You guys have slept together! Multiple times! That’s not little brother-ish, I’m pretty sure!”
Mo Rigen scratches his cheek. “…yeah, but we were drunk or drugged every single time, so it’s—I don’t know. It’s weird. If I try and just imagine him naked, I don’t get hard.”
“I still say that you should just tie yourself up and let Lu Xu do whatever he wants with you when both of you are stone cold sober,” Ashina Qiong comments, sauntering in. “I really doubt you won’t get hard after that .”
While Mo Rigen turns even redder and starts arguing with Ashina Qiong, Hongjun sighs and turns to Li Jinglong. “…do you really think the Winter Fest at Uncle Bob’s Fantanamaland will be enough? Sometimes I think they’re kind of hopeless, but I really do want to help Lu Xu out…”
“I think with a good plan and a bit of pushing, the two of them can get together,” Li Jinglong says firmly. “It’ll take some finessing because they’re both difficult in their own ways, but—well, the Winter Fest in Fantanamaland is supposed to be magical, right? Should be doable.”
“Really?” Hongjun breathes, looking up at Li Jinglong.
Li Jinglong grins and reaches out a hand to ruffle Hongjun’s hair. “Leave it to Gege. When have I ever let you down?” he says confidently, before adding, “Although I’ll need your help to get Lu Xu in position though—he’ll listen to you more than he’ll listen to me.”
“Of course,” Hongjun nods firmly, clenching a fist to his chest. “Operation LangLu has to go smoothly! They’re fated lovers, if they would just see it!”
“Yes, also, unless they get together soon, I don’t know if our poor ship can take any more of their fights,” Li Jinglong says dryly. “Let’s go to my quarters and plan—I picked up some new snacks on Baustin, and Lu Xu and Mo Rigen won’t bother us there.”
“Ooooh, are they those honeycakes?” Hongjun asks eagerly, following after Li Jinglong. “Or is it that slop and gravy stuff?”
Li Jinglong shudders. “It’s honeycakes, I don’t know how you ate that slop and gravy stuff out of a bag…”
“It looked disgusting, but it actually tasted pretty good,” Hongjun replies, licking his lips at the memory. “I wouldn’t mind having it again.”
“Well, if we ever end up in Baustin again, I’ll give you my share,” Li Jinglong says. “If we don’t get in a shoot-out in the middle of the restaurant again…”
“That guy was propositioning Lu Xu in a very nasty way! Gen-ge was totally justified in decking him!” Hongjun stoutly defends their chief engineer.
“If only Lu Xu had taken it that way instead of seeing it as Mo Rigen not thinking that Lu Xu could take care of himself,” Li Jinglong sighs.
“Lu Xu can’t ever talk about his feelings, and Gen-ge is too dense to just figure out his feelings,” Hongjun shakes his head, sitting down in his favorite squashy chair in Li Jinglong’s quarters. “The Winter Fest is romantic, but I’m not sure even the #1 most romantic Winter Fest in all the galaxies can help Lu Xu and Gen-ge enough…”
“They generally are on the same page if they’re fighting together toward the same goal,” Li Jinglong says, sitting down next to Hongjun and handing him a box of honey cakes. “There are a lot of games at Fantanamaland, right? And the Winter Fest is known for its giant puzzle maze…”
“Oh, that would be perfect!” Hongjun exclaims, clapping his hands together. “There’s a whole ceremony crowning the victors that Lu Xu will say is too cheesy but that he will definitely work hard in order to win the prize!”
“And Mo Rigen will probably get amped up about it too,” Li Jinglong nods. “The main thing is just making sure that they don’t mow through the competition.”
“Well, I’m pretty sure a lot of the games are couples games,” Hongjun muses, stuffing a honey cake into his mouth. “So, they’ll have to work hard on that. For the shooting games and ring toss games…hm…wait. Maybe we should also enter?”
“I was just thinking that,” Li Jinglong grins at him while tapping some keys on his personal computer, pulling up the Winter Fest website online. “I see that there’s darts, races, obstacle courses, and puzzles throughout the whole maze…”
“I can carry you through the obstacle course if need be, and you’re the smartest, so you’ll beat all the puzzles!” Hongjun says confidently.
(Yessss, a puzzle/obstacle maze with winter decorations everywhere is the perfect plan to lead up to telling Li Jinglong that he’d actually like to be husbands on more than just paper, right?
Competence is dead sexy!
It’ll be great, he can propose to Li Jinglong at the same time he wins him a crown!
…oh wait, but Lu Xu and Mo Rigen furiously making out if they got crowned the winners would also be a good conclusion to the contest?
Well, they can’t make it easy for them!
They have to get them super worked up so that they stop thinking for a second and just realize the feelings between them!
And if that at the same time happens to get Jinglong worked up too, all the better!)
--
“Ready?” Li Jinglong asks, fastening Hongjun’s cloak more securely around him.
“Ready!” Hongjun grins and nods, rubbing his gloved hands together. “I’ve got all my electroknives, I’m pretty sure I’ve figured out all the settings in my rocket boots, and I’ve been goading Lu Xu for an entire week now, so he’ll be good and ready to try and thrash us!”
Both Li Jinglong and Hongjun glance over to where Lu Xu and Mo Rigen are, and when Lu Xu notices their gaze, he immediately glares daggers at them and mouths, “ You’re going down .”
Hongjun simply sticks his tongue out at Lu Xu, and then grins back at Li Jinglong. “See? Very motivated!”
“Yes, and I’ve been busy telling Mo Rigen all week to consider what it means that he keeps comparing him and Lu Xu to you and me, and also that winning the contest would definitely cheer Lu Xu up, no matter what he actually says, so I think he’s sufficiently motivated as well,” Li Jinglong says, nodding over to Mo Rigen who is busy stretching.
(…wait so, if Jinglong thinks that Mo Rigen and Lu Xu are a little like the two of them…
That definitely implies romantic feelings there, right?
Or sexual ones—
Both!
Maybe it’s not too soon to whip out that ring he bought just in case!
As long as they win—if they don’t win, it seems a little lame to whip that out just yet.
But he thinks he knows how he wants to confess…even Lu Xu grudgingly had said that his words weren’t too cheesy, which was a ringing endorsement coming from Lu Xu!)
While happily planning out his romantic confession (it has to be under the fairy lights and far away from the Fantanamaland mascots because as cute as he thought they were, Smaggy Squirrel and Brobbin Bunny were just not romantic), he notices a familiar figure dressed in all black standing among the other contestants to the maze.
“What’s Xie Yu doing here?” he hisses at Li Jinglong, and also gestures around so Lu Xu spots him as well.
Li Jinglong frowns, crossing his arms. “…I imagine for some reason, he also wants to win the Fantanamaland Winter Fest Crown.”
“Well, he can’t have it!” Hongjun says fervently, glaring daggers at Xie Yu as Mo Rigen bares his teeth at him. “He already stole five whole boxes of Rhovenetian crystals from us! Twice!”
Li Jinglong massages his brow. “That he did. He is wily and smart, we have to give him that.”
Hongjun frowns, shaking his head and grabbing onto Li Jinglong’s arm. “Even if he’s outsmarted us a few times now, he’s still not smarter than you!”
Li Jinglong chuckles, patting Hongjun’s head. “Well, now we have to win that Winter Fest Crown, don’t we?”
Hongjun clenches his fist to his chest. “We will be Winter Fest royalty, and all shall bow in our wake!”
“You’re the ones who will be bowing down to us!” Lu Xu calls out, glaring at Hongjun and then at Xie Yu.
(Ah, right.
…well, Lu Xu and Mo Rigen defeating Xie Yu would also be acceptable, he guesses.
But not as satisfying as him and Jinglong finally getting one over him!
Xie Yu has already interrupted that one nice moment they had where Hongjun was thinking about confessing!
He owes him!
Besides—
Lu Xu and Mo Rigen will do better with more competition, forced to work together as they draw closer against common foes…
It’s the perfect set-up!)
“That’s what you think!” Hongjun calls out, pointing at Lu Xu. “Be prepared to taste defeat!”
Mo Rigen just laughs, glancing over at them and saluting Li Jinglong. “Captain, I’m here to apologize in advance for our crushing victory over you.”
Li Jinglong just raises an eyebrow. “Oh? So confident, are we? Then I won’t apologize for what’s about to happen.”
The bell rings, and they’re off like a shot through the maze, hurling past bushes and trying to dodge the random balloons of paint that begin shooting at them through somewhere.
Lu Xu of course is the swiftest, so he quickly takes the lead, agilely dodging through the hail of balloons, but gets stymied at the riddling hedge animal that forces him and Mo Rigen to play a couple’s game of answering questions about each other.
Li Jinglong on the other hand quickly leads Hongjun over towards another path with vines to climb, which Hongjun makes quick work of while pulling Li Jinglong up as well. They then get stopped with a hedge squirrel that demands that they recite poetry
(This is exactly what Hongjun has been waiting for!
But which poem would be most appropriate, and is it too soon in this maze to be confessing his love…
Maybe fine in metaphor?
Of course it has to be a Li Bai poem.
Oh and he knows one that feels appropriate…)
He clears his throat and begins to recite, “ I was picking flowers, playing by my door/When you my lover, on a bamboo horse/Came trotting in circles and throwing green plums. We lived near together on a lane in Changan, both of us young and happy-hearted.”
Li Jinglong beams at him (maybe he got it? Li Jinglong doesn’t like Li Bai poems all that much, but he still reads them—especially after he met Hongjun), places a hand to his chest, and recites, “ Meeting you, I never want to leave you/Even the East wind is powerless as a hundred flowers wither/In Spring, the silkworms die to become silk/And the melting candle’s tears turn dry.”
(Oh, a Li Shangyin poem!
Very classy—
And more importantly, definitely a love poem!
And fine, maybe that is what this weird plant squirrel is expecting, but Li Jinglong didn’t have to pick such a romantic poem unless he wanted to in the first place.)
As the squirrel stands aside, and both of them rush forward, Hongjun shyly says, “I…really liked that poem!”
“I thought you would,” Li Jinglong says in a pleased voice as they both scramble up the rock climbing wall with laser beams. “I have a volume of Li Shangyin poetry I keep meaning to gift you back on the ship, but I got too caught up in reading it…”
“I can’t wait to read it all the way through!” Hongjun enthuses, spinning out of the way to avoid a snarling vine monster. “What I’ve seen so far sounds really nice—although of course, they’re no Li Bai.”
Li Jinglong sighs, shaking his head. “Your obsession with Li Bai…”
“He’s a genius!” Hongjun protests, punching the vine monster in the nose when it gets too close.
“He’s overhyped in some ways, and at this point, definitely overexposed,” Li Jinglong says, slashing at the other vine monster sneaking up on them with his collapsible sword.
Hongjun indignantly hauls Li Jinglong around an ice wall to avoid getting shot by a droid (wow, this maze really didn’t let up). “Any time anyone mentions ancient Chinese poetry, Li Bai is of course the first who has to be mentioned—”
“Which is precisely why he’s so overhyped,” Li Jinglong argues, using the ice to directly dazzle the android’s eyes and let them get away faster. “He’s practically the only ancient Chinese poet known to many—”
“As he should be!” Hongjun clenches his fist as he punches away the android’s claws. “Even if no one read any other ancient Chinese poetry, they would still be honored to have read Li Bai’s—”
“I disagree, and that’s why I keep trying to convince Lu Xu to read some poems beyond the ones you send him, to no real avail,” Li Jinglong sighs, pulling Hongjun away from the explosion.
“That’s because Lu Xu and me are real bros who would never betray each other like that,” Hongjun says smugly, skipping in delight.
“You just don’t mind crushing each other in competition,” Li Jinglong says dryly as Lu Xu zooms past them and deliberately trips Hongjun.
“Lu Xu, when we get back to the ship, I’m going to put serrano spiders in your hair when you’re asleep!” Hongjun yells, running up to him and trying to shove him off the slippery ledge while at the same time lowering his voice to whisper, “So how’s it going with Mo Rigen?”
“He’s about to dump Captain in a trap and make sure you guys can’t take first place, so I think it’s going swimmingly,” Lu Xu retorts, trying to shove Hongjun right back. “And don’t think that I haven’t seen through your little scheme—even if me and Da Lang are getting along better, it doesn’t mean a thing! He’s still an idiot!”
“An idiot who’s in love with you~~” Hongjun sing-songs, glancing over his shoulder to check on Mo Rigen sparring against Li Jinglong.
(Jinglong will be fine—Mo Rigen may be good, but he’s got nothing on Jinglong!)
Lu Xu’s scowl grows even more pronounced. “You worry about your disgustingly sweet romance and stop butting into my business!”
“But Lu Xu, if I didn’t, you guys will probably be eighty and still stumbling over each other without a single love confession!” Hongjun complains, waving his arms around.
“Good because the only person who wants something like that is you ,” Lu Xu says, then narrows his eyes. “You’ve picked out a poem and everything, haven’t you?”
“Maybe I have,” Hongjun says modestly, twisting away from Lu Xu’s sneak kick.
“Well, too bad, you’re going to pick something else that isn’t part victory speech, because we are leaving you in the dust, ” Lu Xu says as Mo Rigen sprints by. “Have fun saving your man!”
Hongjun hasn’t even had time to glance back at Li Jinglong before Mo Rigen falls into a pit trap ahead. “Have fun saving yours!” he chortles, saluting Lu Xu before hurrying off to go help Li Jinglong.
“Found a short-cut,” Li Jinglong explains as he unties the ropes that he must have purposefully gotten caught up in. “How’s Lu Xu holding up? Mo Rigen seemed to be pretty cheerful about the whole thing so far.”
“I think it went well!” Hongjun says cheerfully, following Li Jinglong into a crevice through the ice wall. “He’s grumpy and seen through us, but he’s calling Gen-ge ‘Da Lang,’ so that’s a good sign! And he’s yelling about love confessions, so it’s definitely on his mind!”
“See? I told you it would work,” Li Jinglong flashes a grin at him. “When has Gege ever let you down?”
“Never,” Hongjun breathes, suddenly realizing how narrow the crevice is and how closely Li Jinglong is pressed up against him.
(Also—is that—
No way, that’s way too big.
Must be his extra sword or something.)
Li Jinglong coughs, his voice now suddenly rough and low. “Um—well, this is tighter than I expected. Can you—can you shift a bit. Sorry about—well. Uh. That.”
Hongjun’s eyes go wide, and he squeaks out, “That’s—is that not your extra sword?”
Li Jinglong grits his teeth, an obvious flush on his cheeks. “No.”
“But how is that supposed to fit in me—” Hongjun blurts out before slapping both hands over his dumb mouth.
(….SHIT.
Why did he just say that????
It had just slipped out because that thing had really felt like an extra sword or leg or something—
Is there a way to somehow salvage this?
Can he pass this off as something weird Lu Xu or Ashina Qiong had sent him?
…well, he doesn’t want Jinglong having murderous thoughts towards Ashina Qiong, so he can’t say that, and Lu Xu will stab him if he gets lectured by Jinglong, so no to that.
Uhhhhh.
Oh this is so embarrassing.)
Li Jinglong is staring wide-eyed at him, his breath puffing up in the cold. “You—uh—I mean—”
“Congratulations competitors on finding this secret passageway, but now you face me! Brobbin Bunny!” a hefty looking bunny android lumbers into the chamber ahead and brandishes a wicked looking flail. “Show your tacit cooperation in battle or be prepared to be thumped flat—”
Hongjun’s knives and Li Jinglong’s sword stab into the bunny android at the same time, and as it lets them pass it by, Li Jinglong says, rubbing his face, “I—really I meant to say this after we potentially won, but—but perhaps we should let Lu Xu and Mo Rigen take the crown since this seems a bit more urgent—”
“Yes,” Hongjun says emphatically, grabbing Li Jinglong’s hands. “Tell me now.”
(Who cares about the victor’s crown when Jinglong’s feelings about him are being finally revealed???
He can only spare one thought that he hopes things are going well for Lu Xu and Mo Rigen and that they grind Xie Yu’s face into dust, but every single other part of him is just vibrating in anticipation.)
Li Jinglong pulls Hongjun over into what looks like a corner draped with fairy lights and surprisingly devoid of lasers, killer androids, and other various traps (but probably not cameras, but ah well), and clears his throat before singing in a low voice, “ What an evening this is, rowing the boat on the river. What a day today is, I have the chance to share the same boat with the Prince. Feeling unworthy of your adoration, yet I am not shamed by the mockeries.”
Hongjun now knows what swooning feels like, because he totally wants to swoon.
(That’s The Song of the Yue Boatman!
The most romantic ancient Chinese song ever!
And Li Jinglong is singing it to him!
They are super real engaged now, right???)
“I know that we got married accidentally,” Li Jinglong says after finishing the song, gripping Hongjun’s hands in his, “but I—I have come to want to make the marriage a reality. I really—I love you, Hongjun, and I want for us to be together, traveling through the stars, for the rest of our lives. What do you say?”
Hongjun feels a little bit as though he’s about to go supernova, but he grips Li Jinglong’s hand back and says, “Yes! A thousand, a million, a billion times, yes!”
Li Jinglong’s eyes are practically shining as he moves to cradle the back of Hongjun’s head and dips him back in the first kiss of Hongjun’s life.
(And what a kiss!
Everything he had imagined—except somehow even better ???
He could write so many poems on this!
Speaking of poems…)
Hongjun immediately surges against Li Jinglong and dips him back, and that occupies them for quite some time, before they have to come up for air again, and Hongjun noses against Li Jinglong’s cheek, licks his swollen lips, and confesses, “…I had a poem picked out to confess to you with.”
“Did you? I’m happy I beat you to the punch, but why didn’t you recite it at the poetry challenge?” Li Jinglong asks, carding a hand through Hongjun’s hair.
Hongjun pouts. “It didn’t seem like quite the right moment yet—I had a whole plan for after we won!”
“Wasn’t the whole point of this to have Lu Xu and Mo Rigen win?” Li Jinglong chuckles and asks.
“It’s not like we could make it easy on them,” Hongjun points out. “And don’t tell me you weren’t trying your best this whole time either, I won’t believe it!”
“We’re all far too competitive,” Li Jinglong laughs, kissing Hongjun again, his mouth smiling against his. “Although I’m willing to let them have the crown now, I have something much better. Tell Gege the poem you were planning to use?”
“… clouds think of clothing like flowers think of beauty/The spring wind blows through pillars and morning dew. Even if I didn’t see you between pillars of jade/I would still meet you under the court of the moon,” Hongjun recites, taking the ring out of his jacket pocket and offering it to Li Jinglong.
Li Jinglong draws in a breath, takes the ring with trembling hands, puts it on, and kisses the corner of his mouth, wrapping his arms around him. “I—Of course I accept the ring. And that’s a beautiful confession that I would have accepted—even if it’s still Li Bai.”
“Li Bai’s a genius!” Hongjun squawks, mildly slapping at Li Jinglong’s chest, and then quickly throwing up a hard-light barrier to deter some other intrepid team from running into them.
“Yes, yes,” Li Jinglong says indulgently, holding Hongjun close and firing around Hongjun’s shield as the other team tries to take them out. “…this seems to be our cue to finish off the race. And then—I have plans for you in my quarters.”
Hongjun shivers in delight and pulls Li Jinglong by the hand forward. “Then what are we waiting for?”
“We’ve waited far too long already,” Li Jinglong agrees, running with him down the maze.
By the time they find their way out (distracted a bit at every abandoned corner because neither of them can quite keep their hands off the other), Lu Xu is already smugly crowned and in some kind of discussion with Mo Rigen.
“They’re talking! So, Mission Accomplished there!” Hongjun says in delight before pulling Li Jinglong in the direction of the port. “Now—you have to legitimize our marriage.”
“You don’t want to explore Fantanamaland some more?” Li Jinglong teases.
“No, I want you to make me yours completely,” Hongjun says bluntly, then flashes Li Jinglong a grin. “Okay?”
Li Jinglong looks a little like the time A-Tai hit him over the head with his lute, just dazed and open-mouthed. “…yes.”
(Oh this is going to be so great.
One way or another it’s definitely going to fit, and it’ll be great, and then they’ll really be husbands!
And then maybe there will be time later to explore Fantanamaland some more—but if there’s not because Li Jinglong is keeping him in bed the entire time, Hongjun isn’t about to complain either.)