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It was getting late. The sun was falling gently behind the city through the window casting its last orange rays over the rumpled bedsheets and disheveled room. Red took a moment to bask in the light while he put on a fresh pair of boxers. After trading places in the shower with Sylas he’d decided to go ahead and strip the bed and throw on some fresh sheets for the evening since he knew where Sylas kept them.
Red put both hands behind his head for a quick stretch before setting to work, being careful not to hit the light fixture as his hands brushed the high ceiling. He was mindful of his horns when he poked his head into the closet for the fresh bedding, the wolf in the shower had a lot of jackets and nice clothes he didn’t wear often so Red assumed they were for certain occasions. He found the extra sheets on a shelf at the top of closet which he reached easily, and set about fitting them onto the bare bed. He heard the shower turn off and after a moment the bathroom door close. Red tracked the footsteps to the balcony as the sliding glass door opened and he heard Sylas step out.
Red was a little worried. They’d had sex and it was still good, but he couldn’t get rid of the feeling that Sylas wasn’t really paying attention. The handsome wolf had been remarkably quiet during their fun time and that was what really gave it away. There was the sudden creak of the swing as it took on sudden weight. It must be serious for Sylas to sit out in the chilly springtime dusk, he was always struggling to stay warm so for him to settle on the old wooden swing in the cold was very unusual. Red finished with the bed and went into the kitchen, he remembered seeing some hot chocolate shoved in the back of a cupboard one evening and thought a warm drink would be perfect for his friend.
Sylas was busy rocking slowly in the old but sturdy wooden swing, focusing on controlling his speed while he tried to track his rampant thoughts. He looked out over the city as the last burning rays of light climbed slowly up the balcony and slipped over the rooftop. The springtime air was crisp and refreshing when he first stepped out in his grey sweat shorts but that same air was beginning to cool and force small shivers down his wide back. Sylas decided he’d return to the comfort indoors when he had settled on a way to approach the matter. He wasn’t making progress.
Sylas huffed and leaned forward, planting his elbows on his knees and pushing his hands up his face, forcing his glasses to rest near his ears. He needed to talk to Red about this, but he struggled to even find a place to begin. And as if summoned by his thoughts he heard the sliding door open and Red step out.
“You don’t seem to be having fun out here,” said Red as he approached with two large steaming mugs. “Here, I made you some hot cocoa. Figured it’d work until I find your coffee.”
“I’m not trying to have fun as much as figure something out,” Sylas grumbled as he rubbed his face before lowering his hands. He looked up at Red and accepted the steaming mug while the big bull settled down next to him. It made his mind scatter even more when Red came to rest next to him, thigh to thigh shoulder to shoulder on the small (to them) swing.
“Whatever it is must be bad for you to be sitting out here shivering like that. Why don’t you lean in a bit and warm up?” Red suggested while holding his left arm up and ready for Sylas.
Sylas couldn’t turn down the offer, it really was getting cold now but that shiver was bc of Red and not bc it was starting to get nippy. He snuggled his back against the big bull as Red settled his muscular arm across his shoulder.
Sylas was facing away from Red now but the frustration he was feeling was somehow worse now! He shifted further into Red for a second before he gave up and let his head come to a rest on his friend’s chest. He closed his eyes, scrunched up his face, and sighed loudly before opening his eyes again and searching the stars for the answer.
Red could see Sylas’s bright blue eyes glowing softly in the light of the rising moon and sighed; he had an idea of what was bothering Sylas now, but he wanted to let him talk it out first.
“You know, I can tell this is really bothering. Now I ain’t gonna be pushy about it, but if you want to talk, I’m already here,” Red said while facing the city. At this point the light was all but spent and you could see the apartments and offices in bigger buildings light up like golden specks.
Sylas sighed in a single big breath before saying, “I do want to talk about something. It’s just that it’s hard to phrase it and I don’t wanna mess it up.” He raised his head before gently dropping it back onto Red. “We have a good thing going….” Sylas trailed off as his words scrambled in his mind again.
Now Red was looking down at him, worry creasing his brow. “We do have a good thing goin, is there something wrong?” Red asked earnestly, looking intently at Sylas wondering what could be bothering him so suddenly?
“Well no, there’s not actually anything wrong but I…” Sylas hesitated before plunging in to get it off his chest. “During our little session with Johnny, I called you my boyfriend without thinking.” Sylas kept his eyes glued to the sky and away from Red's face as he continued.
“I didn’t mean to drop that on you. I would really really really like to be dating you exclusively but I wouldn’t try to pressure you during sex to agree to it!” Sylas was red in the face and feeling his ability to form coherent sentences starting to fail him. “Just… if you’re cool with us being kinda official like that I’d be down, but if you wanna keep to just casual sex I’m gonna have to stop it here.”
Sylas could feel so many words on his tongue but he couldn’t voice them now. The effort it took to get the last bit out was immeasurable. He really didn’t mean to accidentally put Red in a relationship with him, but he’d just been getting along so well and they’d been hanging out so often, it just slipped out. The silence was getting on his nerves so he sipped some of his drink as he sat up off of Red. The big man’s hand stayed on his shoulder though so Sylas turned to look at his friend only to receive the most confused look Red had ever given him.
“Aren’t we dating though?” Red asked quietly, his voice revealing as much confusion as his face.
Sylas was confused at his confusion, “I thought we were doing the ‘friends with benefits’ thing?”
“No offense Sy, but friends with benefits don’t usually stay up stargazing,” Red chuckled and continued “I don’t think they do things like talk to each other’s families or cook dinner for each other or look at each other the way we do hahaha!” Red couldn’t help his laughter at this point.
“Tell me something though,” Red asked after he finished a round of laughing “You were serious about us dating right there, was there some trouble before me?”
Sylas could feel his face burning but now the words were easier to find. He glanced down thinking back.
“The last time I was in a relationship, the guy ended up just stringing me along,” he was quiet as he recalled the events. “I thought I had done something wrong, that maybe bc I was open about wanting a relationship I’d forced it on him somehow.” Sylas was frustrated thinking back, his eyes became misty as he recalled the events.
“He actually became really cold and eventually freaked out because I was and I quote ‘putting too much pressure on him’,” Sylas said bitterly. “We devolved into fighting and arguing after that. It didn’t matter that I had just thought that’s where we were, we’d been living together and everything, I thought it was something that didn’t need to be talked about. I was wrong…”
Sylas couldn’t bring himself to look up at Red, thinking back to the scenes of screaming and tears, of his ex telling him they were never anything serious before manipulating him to spend more and more of his money and life on the bastard. The son of a bitch had even hit him on two occasions and it was the shame that forced his throat to seize up as he tried to keep explaining. He couldn’t bring himself to look up so he kept his teary eyes on his hot chocolate.
Red looked at Sylas and he felt a dark anger that someone had hurt his boyfriend so much that he’d rather sit out in the cold and struggle with himself than come and talk to him about something. He knew there was something more to this than just accidentally getting signals crossed and relationship drama. He’d seen the way Sylas chose to sit with his front facing into rooms and how he snuck quick looks at loud noises. The poor wolf had been doing his best to not push anything onto Red. Sylas just hadn’t seen that Red was waiting for him to open up.
Red leaned forward and set his mug on the balcony before putting both of his hands on Sylas’s shoulders and pulling him into a hug. He rested his chin on top of Sylas as he felt the big guys tears silently overflow onto his chest.
“Sy, I don’t know what all you went through,” Red rumbled quietly, “I just know that you were already there for me when I first got here. I’d like to return the favor and be there for you.”
He held Sylas then, no sexual intent or thoughts of moving occurred to him. He was happy to hold Sylas for as long as it took, the wolfs wide back shook once as he choked on a sob. The fact that someone could hurt such a sweet guy so badly sat sourly in the pit of Red’s stomach, but he would ask about that later when Sylas was ready. As the silver moon rose slowly to grace their evening the tears came to a stop.
Sylas wiped his tears off his face and lifted his head to look Red directly in the eyes. “Your lovely pecs shouldn’t be used as tissues,” he joked weakly with a small smile.
“Sylas don’t you be silly,” Red said with his own small grin. “You call ‘em chest pillows for a reason don’t you?”
Sylas snorted and laughed a little, “Okay I know I like bad jokes but that takes the cake.”
Saying that he realized they had been on the balcony swing for a couple hours now and his own cake was sore from sitting on a cold wooden seat for so long. Sylas felt hungry after all that emotional turmoil so he decided they could talk more over a late dinner. He got up first and stretched while Red picked his mug up and stood up behind him.
“So before we go inside I wanna be clear,” Red said as he stepped up behind Sylas and wrapped an arm around his waist. “You can call me your boyfriend as you want. By my count, you’ve got about two and a half months to catch up on.” Red pulled Sylas backwards against his stomach so he could lean down and kiss the wolf gently.
“I had better get started then,” Sylas breathed after the kiss broke apart. “But first!” Sylas exclaimed eagerly, “We gotta order some dinner, I’m starving after all that and I’m cold. Let’s go inside eh?”
Red shivered slightly from the cold breeze starting up and nodded, “yeah let’s do that. Wanna order Indian food? That place with the good potato curry is still open.”
“You read my mind!” Sylas grinned as he opened the door to the upper living room.
After their curry and lamb and garlic naan had been demolished with eagerness, they spent the rest of that night holding each other as they drifted off to sleep. Sex wasn’t on either of their minds, just the desire to hold someone they cared for and to be held in return and they were so incredibly happy to be able to hold the other.