Work Text:
Here’s a scene:
Hua Cheng is laying on his back and his face is quite gentle so you know who he must be looking at. And he reaches up and caresses Xie Lian’s face.
And they’re upside down from each other because the background is solidifying a bit more and it’s clear now that his head is in Xie Lian’s lap, maybe he put it there thinking he’d be pushed aside but he wasn’t.
He wasn’t, and it burns him so pleasantly.
So he’s smiling up gently at that upside down face of his most beloved god and reaching up and Xie Lian smiles and lets his face be caressed because it feels good. Because it’s nice.
Here’s a scene:
They’re in the kitchen space and it’s dark out, but they were hoping to make a meal so the pot is boiling. They aren’t watching the pot though, instead they’re in each other’s arms and Xie Lian doesn’t look small like that, but he feels it, wrapped up in his husband’s arms. And they’re both holding each other so tight and they aren’t really moving at all so the only movement in this scene is the slow rise and fall of Xie Lian’s breathing and steam escaping from the pot as it bubbles.
And it’s just the two of them here, with the darkness closing in, and there’s no one they need to be strong for here, so they don’t, they just let themselves be held.
And at one point Hua Cheng’s hand tightens on Xie Lian’s back and that’s the only sign you get for how much he wants.
They stay like that for a long time.
Here’s a scene:
Hua Cheng is brushing his hair and Xie Lian has his eyes closed but our view is centered on the way those long fingers try to keep the falling strands within their grasp as long as possible.
The comb is fine toothed and slides through Xie Lian’s hair perfectly because they’ve been at this for some time now with Xie Lian meditating and Hua Cheng worshipping. He’s touching just to touch. Taking joy in the feel of those silky black strands slipping across his palm like water falling.
They don’t need to keep doing this. Xie Lian’s hair is well brushed, but neither of them are shy about stretching out any excuse for touch between them. Such moments are precious.
Here’s a scene:
Xie Lian is walking and he’s alone and he’s been alone so often in his life that it looks natural to see him like this.
But then a butterfly flutters up, silver and shimmering with spiritual energy and the evil aura of its master and Xie Lian invites it onto his finger like it’s a pet. Like it’s something delicate. It’s wings look like gemstones when they shimmer so lovely in the sunlight and so lovely on Xie Lian’s finger.
It’s a killer, but for him it’s docile and beautiful.
It’s vicious and nightmare inducing but it flutters up on his nose and makes him laugh before flying up to rest on his hat.
And he’s not alone anymore. He knows somewhere, perhaps far from here, Hua Cheng can hear him.
Here’s a scene:
Hua Cheng is laying in bed and he wants to reach out but he doesn’t know how because Xie Lian is sleeping and this is all so new he’s worried one touch will make it evaporate.
So he’s laying in bed facing him and watching the stillness of his sleep like a single blink will ruin it, rubbing his thumb along the red thread tied to his finger like a substitute for touch.
And because he is the only one awake to see, he makes the thread visible and marvels at the way it connects them. For a moment, he moves to reach out.
Only to be interrupted by Xie Lian snoring, a sudden almost snort that catch Hua Cheng so off guard he laughs.
Running on sleep instinct Xie Lian reaches out towards that laugh, curling close to Hua Cheng in their bed and the angle is a little weird, but it’s exactly what he wanted.
Here’s a scene:
It’s sunset and they’ve both seen the sunset a million times before. It’s not even a particularly pretty one, it’s a little cloudy today and not in the way that makes the sun spread colors through the clouds but in the way that makes it more of slow darkening of everything around them.
But they had decided they were going to watch the sunset because Hua Cheng had said he’d never paid attention to them much before and Xie Lian insisted they were beautiful so they’re sitting outside, watching a cloud dark sky fall even darker around them.
And it would be disappointing but really they both know they’ll get more chances to see sunsets together so for today they just waste time letting it fall to night and when they go in Hua Cheng says he understands the beauty of a sunset now.
And Xie Lian laughs.
Here’s a fact:
There’s a world out there with famine and war and people who are cruel because it’s what they were taught. There’s a world full of pain and loss and anger and grief.
And these scenes do not make those things disappear. These scenes do not heal the trauma that piles on like layers and layers of sand pressed down by the weight of each new awful thing until they make layers in the earth’s crust.
These scenes do not erase what has happened and what is still happening. They do not change that there will still be days of hurt and days of fear and days of anger so strong it poisons.
But these scenes are the sprouts of proof that something good can grow.
These scenes are the simple joys that make life worth living or even just bearable.
Big joys will come, but these simple joys are much easier to find if only you look.
And they can’t help but make each other look.