Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Of course when you broach the space between realities, eldritch things with tentacles would manifest. Of course. Alphys knew she should have accounted for this. It was only something to be expected!

…It’s not like she lacked familiarity with eldritch things.

Everything was fine. She could handle this entity - like darkness made manifest - that tore at the edges of this portal across time and space with its corroding sludge. She knew the sequence to initiate the emergency shutdown - even had the page dog-earned in the manual, just in case! It didn’t matter that she punched the keys almost hard enough to bend her claws in her urgency. The computer didn’t care how hard she hit the buttons.

The entity hissed as the energy oscillated around it. Alphys… her mind must be playing tricks on her, because she could’ve sworn the noise sounded like “Oh no you don’t". She couldn’t let herself give into pareidolia. She watched the readings as the portal roared above her, unwilling to let it transfix her from the numbers. A tentacle lashed out at the instrument panel, smudging the display, and she batted at it so she could follow along with the marching graphs.

And then the roar ceased. Alphys blinked away the tinnitus and forced her focus onto her breathing. She was alright. Nothing had broken, or escaped. Only a steady drip echoed in the laboratory.

…Drip from where?

Alphys gathered the courage to peer over the display. The sludge coalesced into something solid, something with a face, and tentacles, and a nuclear-blue glow. Or- or something greener, more aqua or cyan. Very bright. Very dangerous.

…surprisingly alluring.

“Alphys,” it hissed.

It could speak.

“H-hello?” Alphys said. An entity beyond space and time that knew her name probably expected more impressive first words than that, but anything better choked in her throat.

The entity… it had… settled in this form? She supposed she could call it that. It was bipedal now, with four oozing tentacles and a pair of comparatively bony arms. It was turning its head as though searching the room.

“Whatever you did, Alphys, it appears I’m trapped here,” it said. Something about its voice echoed with a frequency that cut to her bones. That nuclear cyan glow pierced right at her. “You are this AU’s Dr Alphys, yes?”

“Y-yes.” Maybe that was a bad idea. Maybe it was the wrong thing to say to an interdimensional goop thing that already knew her name. Maybe it wanted revenge for being trapped her by her. Before she could act on that, another racing thought displaced it. “A-AU? Um, you mean astronomical unit?”

The entity stared her down, oozing disdain. “Alternate universe,” it said.

For once, excitement flooded out Alphys’s anxiety. Alternate universes. Alternate existences, alternate lives. They did exist, and she had confirmation. No - more than confirmation: a witness. An interdimensional traveler, sapient and comprehendible enough to hold a conversation! “Ohmigod, really? Alternate universes - does that mean you’ve met alternate mes? What no, of course you did, you just said that! Or implied it, haha. It’s gotta be - omigod, I want to know everything! I don’t even know where to start asking questions!"

“You can start,” said the entity, “by finding a way to reverse this.”

Right, right. Of course something thrust into an alternate universe would prioritize getting home. And Alphys made it all about herself and her selfish starry-eyed dreams. “Um, I can try. Uh, the machine - it should have saved the readings for where in space-time it opened the portal, so - probably if I open in the same place, it should get you right back! Um.” Alphys recalled the diagnostic manual. “By triggering an emergency shutdown, it’ll take some time for the machine to get up to power-state. Several circuits - fail-safes - melted and need to be replaced. That’s supposed to happen! Prevents a portal from spontaneously re-opening and-”

“How long will it take?” asked the entity.

“A few days, if we rush it,” said Alphys. “But, um, that might risk you… um, being torn apart on the molecular level? Aha, I’d want to make sure I do it right and not hurt anyone! And then I’d want to triple-check that I’m sending you back to the right place, and…”

“I should be able to find my way back home on my own,” said the entity. “The problem is this.” It held its hands apart, just sightly wider than its broad shoulders. Darkness swirled in the space, tangible, a pinwheeling cyclone, and then it collapsed to a sparkling point. “However you brought me here, it interfered with my ability to form portals of my own.”

“Oh. Well. That, I- I don’t know how to solve that, sorry. I couldn’t begin to know to solve that! I don’t know anything about your biology, or even what you are. I don’t even - omigod, I didn’t even ask your name! What’s wrong with me? Um, assuming you have a name that’s… comprehensible by three-dimensional monsters confined to a single universe like me?” She really needed to stop talking.

“Nightmare,” said the entity. It was by her shoulder now, observing the displays alongside her. Its presence made the back of Alphys’s neck prickle. “I never was a scientist, unlike… others.” Did it sound wistful, almost? Or maybe Alphys was reading too much into it. She didn’t know the behavioral mannerisms of interdimensional entities! “It appears I must rely on you.”

The phrasing made her think of Asgore and she squirmed. She couldn’t really promise to try her best now, could she? Not with her anxiety eating away at her motivation. The only reason she was able to get this far with the portal was that it was such a different avenue of research than the study of SOULs and determination, but now, because this person was relying on her…

Food. She had just been through an ordeal. Nightmare had just been through an ordeal. Food and water would replenish them, or at least make it easier to think clearly. “Um, well. Since you’re trapped here - not that I’m trying to make light of it, haha! - b-but you’re probably hungry and I have some ramen, and yogurt, and ice cream. Um. There’s more stuff, but I’d have to check the fridge.”

Nightmare loomed behind her. “I feed on your insecurities - your doubts, your fears, your hatreds. Every negative thought you’ve had nourishes me in ways that neither human nor monster food satiates.”

Alphys gave a nervous giggle. “Well, at least you won’t go hungry!” What was she thinking, making a joke like that? That would be so much more appropriate as an Undernet vaguepost instead of something you say to someone’s face.

But Nightmare was… smiling? It was the most relaxed she’d seen of him yet. Less fearsome and more... kakkoii. “Quite,” he said.

Chapter Text

Alphys ended up making herself some instant noodles. Nightmare took a seat at the table, just watching Alphys dump a bunch of empty noodle cups into the trash can. She really should clean up - should’ve several weeks ago. Nightmare politely didn’t mention it, just regarded her coolly, unruffled, as the microwave made its steady hum.

She had so many questions for him! About where he came from, who he was, the undulating motions of his sleek tentacles. Her gaze kept flicking from Nightmare’s tentacles to his eyelight to the poised hands folded on the table, all an oily black tinged with that nuclear blue. The way the gooey substance was constantly, almost subconsciously, in motion, reconstructing his skeletal form, flowing into a strange number of phalanges before restoring itself-.

“You have questions?” Nightmare asked when she took the opposite seat.

It interrupted her train of thought, and Alphys blurted out the first one that came to her: “If you’re a nightmare, why are you a skeleton?”

Instantly, she yelped and started shoveling noodles in her mouth. What was she thinking, asking someone why they were a skeleton!?

At least Nightmare looked intrigued, maybe even amused, but not offended. “What should I be instead?”

“Oh, um.” She gestured at her idea, but fruitlessly failed to communicate it. “Aha, a scary-looking lizard? Since you’re a nightmare, a-and here with me…”

She sounded stupid, but Nightmare was smiling. “You are mistaken, perhaps under the impression I am some shapeshifter, appearing in a form you find most frightening? I am not. I am merely a skeleton.”

Alphys cringed under the recognition of her assumptions. At least she hadn’t upset him. “Um. Sorry. You just - you look a lot like m- Sans.” Could she still call herself friends with Sans? She barely knew anything about him, and didn’t want to give the impression they were closer than they were.

“So I’ve been told,” said Nightmare. He didn’t elaborate.

Alphys gulped down more noodles to fill the silence. She wanted to ask questions - to know everything about Nightmare! He must know so much! But she didn’t know what wouldn’t be embarrassing. Was there a reason he wasn’t talking about himself? His past? Would she be treading into sensitive territory if she asked?

“Your thoughts,” said Nightmare. “You’re working yourself into a tizzy. Not that I don’t appreciate the meal.” He grinned at that and. Wow. That made him really look like Sans.

“Um. What’s your home… universe… like?” Alphys scrambled.

From the cant of Nightmare’s one visible eyelight, he was thinking on his response. At least Alphys hoped that’s what he was doing.

At last, Nightmare said, “There is a castle. And servants. Lost souls from across the multiverse. It is home, after a fashion.”

“Is it on the surface?” Alphys blurted.

Nightmare looked startled. “Yes, you wouldn’t have experience with the surface, would you?”

“What’s it like?” Alphys couldn’t keep a yearning from her voice. The same traumatic hope she had seen in so many other monsters when they dreamed of the surface. The dream that led her to…

“The stone is cold, but it heats in the sunlight, sometimes enough that you can feel it in your touch. The world… operates… on a day-night cycle - not this artificial one you have Underground, but ambient. There simply is light, and then a lack of it. The sky - there’s no ceiling, it is limitless, yet you perceive it as a celestial dome. The outside world is always changing - breezes, the feel of it on your body, smells. You can feel the heat of the sun on you. It is strange for sound to echo. There is life everywhere - even moreso than the myriad life Underground: songbirds and raptors, scolding jays and chittering squirrels. Oaks and pines, maple, magnolia. Shrubs with flowers that mark the seasons and wilt soon after they are formed. Ivies, fireflies, ladybugs, mosquitoes. All crawling towards the sun.”

“That sounds… pretty amazing,” said Alphys. She hadn’t quite followed along with the parts that didn’t have analogies in the Underground, but as Nightmare’s words built, his tone bore a wistfulness of its own that communicated enough. “Were you ever trapped Underground?”

“…I was trapped in a different way,” said Nightmare after some time. “And a castle is a stronghold against that danger.”

“I’m sorry,” Alphys said, because that was all that she could think to say to sympathize.

“Don’t apologize, Alphys. It’s an unnecessary distraction at best, and a failed substitute for absolution otherwise.”

“Oh, s-“ She cut herself off before another apology slipped from her tongue.

“Manifesting the portal will serve,” said Nightmare.

Alphys was watching a newly-unearthed season of an anime - something gruesome, with exploding corpuscles of flesh and dismembered limbs flying everywhere - when she felt an eerie prickle crawl up the ridge of spines along her back. She paused the noise. “H-hello?”

“Don’t you have work to do, Dr Alphys?”

Alphys breathed out. It was just Nightmare. “I-I’m working on it. The portal.”

“Really? Because it looks like you are watching anime.”

Alphys wanted to lie and say it was crucially important research on human technology. She wanted to ask Nightmare what anime he liked and whether he recognized this one. But the piercing gaze he gave her made her shrivel up until the only words she could force out were, “Y-yeah, haha. Let me… portal.” She switched off the program and pulled out her calculations.

And that’s how it was. Alphys poring over numbers and figures, cross-referencing the slagged pieces of machinery and scrounging up replacement parts. The machine wasn’t yet ready for test runs, and parts kept slipping from Alphys’s sweaty hands as she worked under Nightmare’s domineering gaze. She got a surprising amount of work done, until she didn’t.

The letters from families piled up on her desk - she couldn’t bear to open them. Mettaton asked about the progress on his new body. She left his messages on read. Sans dropped by with a large bag of dog food.

“Enough to feed a whole family of dogs,” said Sans with a wink.

“Thanks,” said Alphys.

“And something from Grillby’s.” He hefted her a greasy paper bag that towered over his head. “Just call me the burgermeister.”

Alphys snorted at the pun. “Um, actually…” Sans had a background in science, perhaps he might...? “D-d’you have time to come in?”

“Aw, Alphys. You know me, I got a strict schedule of nothing to accomplish.”

“Oh, well, if you d-don’t want to-“

“Nah, Al. I’m just teasing. ‘Course I can pencil you in.” Sans brushed past her and dropped the bag of takeout on her workbench, toppling several unsteady stacks of paper.

“R-right, um.” Alphys wandered through the ground floor of the lab, glancing around. “N-Nightmare?” Even when trying to call out, her voice stayed small. Where was he? She peered at Sans out of the corner of her eyes. He appeared to be patiently watching her, but probably thought she sounded crazy, yelling about nightmares. “Y-you can come out! I have s-someone I want… to show you!”

Nothing. Not a trace of Nightmare, as though she’d dreamed him up.

“I-I…” Alphys knew she was falling into the cliché ‘It was here, I swear!’ She looked helplessly at Sans.

“Eh, not the only shy pal in the lab,” said Sans with a shrug. “I gotta get back to my post or Undyne’ll have my head.” He winked. “Don’t work too hard, Al. She’ll start expecting things of you.”

“R-right.” Alphys kneaded her hands. It was an obvious front, but for what? Sans was always hard to read.

Sans left, Alphys shoved the bag of burgers into her dimensional box, and turned right into Nightmare’s appraising gaze.

“O-oh! You are here! I-I-" It had definitely been a mistake to spring that on him unannounced. “S-sorr- wait you don’t like apologies, s- I should have asked if you’d be okay meeting anyone! The idea just came to me, s-since Sans knows about quantum physics, and-“

“I’d rather not see anyone,” said Nightmare, cutting off her ramble.

“Ah, um.” Alphys thought of the warm burgers in her dimensional box. They wouldn’t cool while in this stasis, but she had been busy since last feeding time. “There’s a lot more people here Underground than just me. P-perhaps this might go faster if m-more people - you don’t have to be stuck in the lab with me, aha!” How obvious did she sound?

“It’s better if I’m not seen,” said Nightmare.

“Um. Monsters don’t - the monsters here, at least - they’re not going to think you’re weird. They’ve been nothing but kind, and warm, and reassuring, and strong…” And not deserving of what I’ve done to them. She was thinking of Asgore and Undyne.

“No, it’s more… if I am visible in public, certain… self-appointed authorities will consider me meddling, and… without a means of egress, fighting would be… unwise.”

“Th-that makes sense, yeah.” Several thoughts passed through Alphys. Relief that Nightmare wasn’t upset with her and didn’t feel pressured by her to stay, a smidge of disappointment that he had other reasons than her company, and a sharpening awareness of time.

“Um, I need to-“ She struggled for an excuse. She chewed on the edge of her pen. She checked a nearby clipboard of experimental observations. She really needed to get down to the true lab, but didn’t know what to tell Nightmare to make him stay. She edged toward the elevator.

He noticed immediately. “Where are you going, Alphys?”

“Just checking on a thing! You should stay up here. For safety! Bye!” And she slammed the elevator door in his bemused face.

She really didn’t want to be rude or lie to him, but she couldn’t tell him. She had already made horrible mistakes, and that poor monster just trying to reach his home AU - he’d hate her. He’d distrust her, and- and-

Alphys didn’t know what would follow that ‘and’, aside from yet another failure. Yet another failed go at making things better.

The elevator door opened. Alphys scattered a volley of lightning-bolt bullets in a greeting - one hit the switch, completing the circuit and shunting on all the lights. She shook the bag. “Lunch time!” she called out. “Or… whatever meal it is right now.”

Lemon Bread answered with a snap of her maw. Endogeny’s paws thundered right behind, and soon the undulating mass of dogs foamed happily onto Alphys’s chin. She giggled and playfully batted them away. Reaper Bird and the memoryheads skittered forward, chattering inanely, and Crystal Lattice slunk at the rear.

A shadow blocked the bright lights of the true lab. “Why would you fear for my safety?” said Nightmare. “I am deathless.”

At that moment, Endogeny registered a new potential friend and bounded over. Nightmare firmly pushed them away with a tentacle.

“Don’t hurt them!” Alphys rushed to Endogeny’s side and observed the rippling haunch where Nightmare had made contact. No damage, as far as she could tell. At least beyond the effects of DT itself.

“They are incapable of feeling pain,” said Nightmare.

She had dropped the bag of dog food in her hurry, and Endogeny and one of the memoryheads happily nibbled up the spilled kibble. “That doesn’t matter! I told you not to follow me! How did you get down here?” She had been using the elevator, and only she had the key.

Nightmare folded his arms. “A door cannot stop me.”

“Well, yeah! Anyone can break down a door! It’s the symbolism - closed door means stay out!” As the adrenaline wore off, Alphys came back to herself. What was she doing, yelling at someone like this!? Especially someone from another time and place who might not know the etiquette?

But Nightmare didn’t want apologies. Alphys caught her flushed breath and thought on what to say.

As she scrambled, snowflakes settled on her warm cheeks. Crystal Lattice sat mournfully nearby, aware Alphys was upset, but perhaps not why. Alphys mentally thanked her anyway.

“They don’t need to eat, but if you insist on it, you could have asked me to feed them so you could keep working,” said Nightmare.

Alphys couldn’t stop her shudder. “You don’t know them. They’re my fault and my responsibility. At least until I… get up the courage to tell everyone. And - and it’s a nice break from working. Doing something other than failing to make progress or watching shows I’ve seen a thousand times already.” Alphys withdrew the takeout bag from her dimensional box and distributed the contents to the amalgamates.

When Alphys looked up again, Nightmare was perched on one of the lab benches like a gargoyle, saying nothing but watching with a tinge of curiosity in his eyelight. Alphys turned away and made her standard evaluations of the amalgamates’ health, to make sure they were stable and not worsening, and also hoping against hope this would resolve itself and everyone could go back home, safe and whole.

“You were worried about a creature who revels in misery and despair, who has fed upon monsters who have committed cruelties unfathomable, who has no prior knowledge of you - only your AU counterparts - finding out about these creations,” Nightmare said eventually. “Why?”

And that question was enough. Alphys spilled the whole story of her creation of the amalgamates - the extraction of DT from the human SOUL, the injection of the flower, asking Asgore for the bodies of monsters who had fallen down. How, even if she hadn’t found a solution to the barrier, she had restored their loved ones, so something good had come out of it. The happy letters, the relief, and then… the way they collapsed, the way their dust congealed and melded, forming creations that didn’t seem to belong to this reality.

“I- I did something horrible,” concluded Alphys, and any further words foundered into sobs.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” said Nightmare. “You made a mistake. I have met murderers who slaughtered entire nations to break the endless monotony. You have barely scratched the surface of depravity.”

“I still hurt people, though,” said Alphys. “I know the right thing to do is tell everyone, and send them back home to their families, and- and I know they might hate me for what they did to their relatives. And- and that’s fine! It’s what I deserve for… messing up. And I know it’s not that difficult to write a letter. I just… can’t. I have no motivation to, and every time the guilt creeps in and I feel all the worse for not being able to do what should be easy!” Alphys sobbed. “I just - the measure of who you are is in how you respond to your mistakes, right? And I’ve - all I’ve done is run from them, and hide them, and cover up my mistakes with more lies. This was - this was my big chance to do something great and prove myself that when it came down to it, that I’d step up and show what I really was and I failed. I’m every bit the coward I was afraid I’d be. Mettaton swore to me that I wouldn’t, but… he ended up wrong.” Snot was leaking from her nose. She probably looked gross and pathetic blubbering like this. She scrounged for a tissue. Nightmare handed her the box with a tentacle.

“Your implosion was more protracted than mine,” said Nightmare after some time.

It took several moments for Alphys to dredge herself from her self-pity and register the implication.

“You… aren’t the only one who’s made a mistake. From… the best of intentions unleashed an unforeseen harm upon others.” Nightmare was staring at his hands.

“How did you… handle it?”

He did not respond. The silence stretched, broken only by the pitiful cries of the amalgamates.

“S-sorry,” said Alphys. “You d-don’t have to answer! I should’ve known it’d be a sensiti-“

Nightmare hushed her with a tentacle over her mouth. The sudden touch on her flesh sent a shiver through her. “Enjoy the silence, Alphys.” His tone was kind, perhaps a little chiding.

Alphys responded with a nervous giggle. She put a hand over her mouth where Nightmare had touched her. “I don’t… really like being alone with my thoughts,” she said. She needed stimulation - music, anime, the various notifications on her phone.

Nightmare smiled at her. “But Alphys, you aren’t alone.” He gestured, and the amalgamates surged in.

Chapter Text

Something had changed between the two of them after that.

Nightmare had become less… imposing and more… reflective. Instead of a gaze piercing like a gimlet, he was distant, lost in his thoughts. He no longer hassled Alphys about working on the portal her every waking moment, nor shut her down when she verbally worked out a problem. In those circumstances, he’d instead lean on the desk, chin on his palm, and nod along. He didn’t seem to understand much of the technical details, but Alphys did her best to communicate the general theory.

He even joined Alphys for an anime watchathon, and indulged her when she paused the show to excitedly infodump about cultural details that didn’t translate to life Underground. She showed him her collection of anime and manga, and in return, Nightmare told her stories he knew, or half-remembered. Picaresques and folk tales, stories told and retold so much that the same character who is an unjustly put-upon victim in one story becomes a revenge-seeking cannibal in others. Without an authoritative canon, he refused to tell her which version he thought was the ‘real’ one.

He also accompanied Alphys to the True Lab to feed and care for the amalgamates.

“You f-feed on negative feelings, right?” said Alphys. She kneaded her forehead. It was only the first thing he’d said!

“I do.” Nightmare didn’t comment further. He was sitting beside an elegiac Crystal Lattice, watching her response to Reaper Bird.

“The am-malgamates, are they…?” Alphys scrambled for a phrase. “You said they c-can’t feel pain, right? Are they scared, or…?” When Alphys looked up again, Nightmare was giving her a contemplative look.

“Their emotions aren’t clear,” said Nightmare. Reaper Bird shrilled a cackle at that, and Crystal Lattice echoed with a weak chuckle. When the noise died down, he continued, “They are something like seeing a picture through static. There are many individuals melded into one, and the effect on their emotions - it is hard to know what they understand. What I can say is that they do not feel pain as we understand it.”

Not as reassuring as Alphys hoped.

“O-oh, I-I.” She was beyond sobbing. She just felt… empty. “I really screwed up, didn’t I? If they are s-so unnatural even y-you can’t und-derstand…”

Nightmare entwined a tentacle with Alphys’s tail, inviting her to his other side with a gentle tug. Alphys scurried over and let the comforting weight of one of Nightmare’s lithe extra limbs rest across her shoulders.

“Dr Alphys,” said Nightmare. “How did you create the amalgamates?”

“T-too many injections of DT,” said Alphys. She cringed at the memory.

“And these extra injections, were they done willy-nilly? Or following a set increased dosage in order to cause some observable effect?”

He had repeated nearly verbatim part of her rushed explanation to him earlier. “W-well I did… d-did set them up… M-my lab notes - the proper ones -“

“Alphys,” Nightmare chided gently.

“I-increased d-dose, yeah,” said Alphys. She couldn’t look at him.

“And how did you acquire the bodies of these fallen monsters?” Nightmare continued.

“A-asgore asked the families.”

“And what did he tell these families?”

Alphys’s claws clicked against the tile floor of the True Lab. “Th-that their loved ones would be used to research alternative means of breaking the barrier.”

“Yes. And were there any warning signs, any suggestion or previous research on the effects of Determination on monsters?”

“There might have been somewhere!” Alphys cried.

“But did you find any?” Nightmare asked patiently, ignoring her outburst.

“N-no.”

“And how thoroughly did you research this? Sloppily? Or poring through previous research documents on monster SOULs and Determination?”

Alphys hugged her tail. The tentacle became more snug around her shoulders. “Y-you seem to want me to say the latter. O-or something like it. But I must have m-missed something! There h-had to have been something-“

“-From previous amalgamations?” Nightmare finished.

Alphys squirmed. “Th-they might not have panicked and ov-verdone the dose.”

“You increased the dosage at a regular - albeit steep - rate, yes?” said Nightmare. When Alphys didn’t reply, he continued, “Would you have condemned your predecessor had they chosen an experimental DT-injection dose range that fell within amalgamation requirements?”

“W-well, you shouldn’t overdo the d-dosage unless-“

“Alphys” Nightmare said again.

“I should have waited longer,” said Alphys eventually. “Longer before increasing the DT dose, longer before subsequent injections, longer before telling everyone they could go home.” She hugged her tail all the tighter. “I g-got so caught up in the p-possibility-!” A near-sob shook her. “The families would be right to hate me, after I did this.”

Nightmare was frowning. “Dr Alphys, there will always be people who dislike you for reasons beyond your control and will blame you for results impossible to foresee. If they cannot overcome this prejudice, they are not worth your concern.”

Alphys flinched. “But, they’re the families-!”

“-And blinded by their love such that they are unable to look at the situation logically. If they hate you, then they are looking for an easy answer - someone to blame for their loved ones’ fate - and in that state it is easier to accept malice than simple error. Or misjudgment, if you insist on accepting blame.”

Alphys didn’t think Nightmare was right, but she didn’t know what to say in response.

“I’m not saying you insult the families who hate you, or write off their grief. I am saying that their blame is unwarranted, and not anything you need to account for when evaluating yourself. Regardless, that is merely the worst case scenario. Monsters, I am told, are exceptionally kind and forgiving.” Bitter irony crept into Nightmare’s tone in that last sentence, and… Alphys didn’t think it was directed at her? He didn’t talk much about his past, but given his hints…

“Sometimes I wonder if I should just continue the DT experiments, since I’m so far gone,” Alphys said instead. She couldn’t look at Nightmare. Instead, her eyes fell on Reaper Bird. Its splayed legs stretched and withdrew across the tile floor, and it blinked.

“Why not do so?” asked Nightmare.

“What if I make them worse?” cried Alphys.

“You turned their loved ones into a shapeless mass, incapable of pain or death, and barely more aware than a beast,” said Nightmare. “How could you possibly make this worse?”

Alphys shrunk into herself. “I’d manage it. I created them by trying to make my experiments show results.” She sniffed. “I really should just… admit what I’ve done, but I can’t! I told everyone their loved ones could go home! I gave them the hope - Hope means everything, and it’d crush them. How can I even explain-!”

“’My dear friends. It is with my deepest regrets I must rescind my earlier announcement. Unfortunately, the nature of plumbing such an unexplored field of study means I prematurely declared what I believed to be a breakthrough. I was wrong. Further observation indicates I made the right choice in delaying the homecoming until I was sure you could safely be reunited.

‘Please don’t mistake my continued silence for lack of caring. If I cannot restore your loved ones, then it is my responsibility to continue my research and ensure their sacrifice was not in vain’,” Nightmare concluded. He had recited it with a disinterested cadence, as though he routinely apologized for crimes against monstrosity.

“You make it sound so easy,” said Alphys.

“I have had centuries of practice., and you weren’t hired as an orator,” said Nightmare. “Asgore should have been familiar enough with your reticence to have provided you one, but the goat…” He huffed.

“Asgore’s been k-kind to me, even when I’ve given him no reason to,” Alphys said, staring at her clawed feet.

Nightmare began to say something about kindness, but then stopped. He held out a hand. Alphys looked at him, then the offered hand, and took it.

“N-Nightmare?” Alphys said after some time. “Thank you for eating my negativity. It really made things easier - better - for me.”

Nightmare straightened. He regarded her with a much more intense gaze than he had been. “Dr Alphys… I fear you have… I fear I let you operate under a misapprehension. I cannot take away your negative feelings by feeding on them.”

“You can’t? But I felt better talking-!“ Alphys scrunched up her face and rubbed her brow. “Right. I felt better talking to someone about them.” She sniffed a laugh. “Call myself a scientist and logical and I fell for a magic feather.” Another thought occurred to her. “Wait! But that means - if all that talking made me feel better, then there was less for you to feed on!”

Nightmare chuckled. “Please, Dr Alphys. You have enough anxiety to keep me sated for a long time. Whether you tell, or let it fester, I am satisfied.”

“S-so, I do have good news!” said Alphys when Nightmare joined her in the portal room for a status update. “We just need to prep the wires by letting the current run through them overnight, and then I’ll have the portal up and ready for testing tomorrow!”

Nightmare’s small, satisfied smile made Alphys swell with pride. “Excellent work, Dr Alphys. So tomorrow I’ll be able to portal home.”

“Yes!” said Alphys. Then his words sunk in, and her mood fell. He’ll be able to portal. Oh god - did he really did think restarting the portal would bring his powers back? That only worked in shows!

She needed to say something. Now was the ideal time to seize the moment and confess - no, correct his misconception. Sooner rather than later. The truth would come out regardless. Don’t let this fester like the amalgamates…

The words were in her mouth. She just needed to speak. Her jaw wouldn’t move.

“I said something to upset you, Dr Alphys,” said Nightmare. He looked to the machinery and back. “Have I, ah, ‘jumped the gun’, as it were?”

Good old Nightmare. Asking outright allowed Alphys to seize the opening he'd thrown her. “I can’t- um. At least I don’t think so! The portal can’t - Recreating the circumstances of an accident to reverse its effects - that… only really happens in fiction. Um. Sorry.”

There. She’d said it. Or enough that Nightmare should be able to infer… no, she really needed to be clearer. “I don’t think I’ll be able to bring your powers back with this.”

Nightmare looked contemplative. “What was the purpose of rebuilding the portal, then? Surely physical examinations could have been a better use of time?”

Alphys’s resulting blush came both from the shame of failing this monster relying on her and the embarrassment of picturing herself stripping him naked for the medical exam. “T-to send you b-back home,” she said. Of course she should have offered to do exams on him! Sure, she didn’t know his biology or any possible medical aid he could benefit from, but whatever medics they had at his home didn’t know the portal’s machinery and specs!

“Ah,” said Nightmare. “It’s just as well, then,” he muttered before addressing Alphys directly. “It appears we’ve made mutual misunderstandings, and there is something I should come clean about as well.” He held out a hand, then paused. “Shall we go out and… clear the air over, mm, ice cream?”

“Oh, um. Yes?” Alphys hadn’t been expecting to leave the lab… ever, to be honest, aside from a few food runs and trips to the dump for supplies. And she dressed like it, too, she realized. “If we’re going out, I should put on something nicer.” Kuso! That made her sound like she thought this was a date. “Uh, just changing my jacket, I mean. Because we’re going outside. The lab. Not out on a date!” Before she could embarrass herself further, she bolted to her closet and grabbed a decent jacket. She threw on a clean shirt as well, for good measure.

Now slightly more presentable, Alphys took the proffered hand this time. As soon as her skin made contact with his bones, a pool of darkness manifested around them. It swirled around the two, and an exhilarating fear spiked through Alphys. She seized onto the nearest warm body as waves pulsed around her and dissipated.

She had latched onto Nightmare, claws digging into his goop and tail wrapped around several of his tentacles. She had her snout buried in his collarbone. When she finished her muffled screaming, she pulled herself off him, aborted apologies spilling from her mouth. She was sure her cheeks were burning.

It took Alphys a moment to reorient herself spatially, and then another causally. They were in a corner of Waterfall, just off Blook Acres, which implied… “You can portal!” she exclaimed.

“It’s recovering,” said Nightmare. “It appears your machine caused only a temporary disabling. I should be able to travel AUs in the next few days.”

“Oh. That’s… good. Really good!” said Alphys, trying to force as much glee into her voice as possible. In a few days, he would leave her. At least if it were through her efforts, she would have done something nice for him. Now, all she had managed to cause was inconvenience.

“Dr Alphys,” Nightmare said eventually. “Had I been less… reticent about my recovery, would you have been able to… determine its resilience? Whether the portal can permanently disable my powers, or whether its effects were a fluke?”

“Oh! If you give me your cell phone, I can cobble together a monitor that’ll track your magic output - Won’t have much of a baseline, unfortunately, but we can still gather some- You don’t have a cell phone,” Alphys realized halfway through her ramble. “Well, um. I can get you a cell phone when we get back and then we can start taking readings.” She felt silly, but Nightmare was smiling. Then a thought occurred to her. “Wait, aren’t there people who… you didn’t want to attract the attention of?”

“Mm, I’ve since concluded my earlier concerns were… overblown,” replied Nightmare. “Much as my refusal to speak up about my recovery.”

“Ah,” said Alphys.

The Nice Cream bunny was apparently doing a cross-promotion with Napstablook’s snail farm. Alphys… felt like she was betraying Mew Mew by going with her usual - she wasn’t that adventurous! - but Nightmare surprised her by ordering the snail-flavored cone.

Alphys was… very curious to learn how a skeleton actually ate and watched Nightmare surreptitiously. He caught her looking - sending a fearsome blush along her cheeks - and a thin black tendril - a tentacle in miniature - darted from his mouth against the ice cream. Okay, that was- She really didn’t have anyone to blame but herself for the sudden mental images that brought more heat to her cheeks. With a grin, Nightmare tilted the cone in her direction, offering her a taste. And, well, she may not have been that adventurous, but she was this adventurous.

She had only a moment to reflect that they’d technically shared an indirect kiss - almost like this was a real date! - when two familiar voices caught her attention.

"Omigod, Alphys!”

“We haven’t seen you, in, like-“

“Like, forever.”

“Yeah!”

“Hi Bratty. Hi Catty,” Alphys said. Guilt crawled up her back as she saw the eager looks on her friends’ faces.

The cat and gator monsters caught sight of Nightmare. Bratty clasped her hands over her mouth and Catty squealed.

“Ohmigod, is this-“

“You have a boyfriend!”

“That’s why you’ve been so busy!”

“Yeah, girl. You were practically ghosting us.”

Alphys flinched. “No, no. It’s- uh. It’s not that. It’s… royal scientist stuff. That’s why I’ve been busy. Not boyfriend stuff.”

The two of them gave Alphys a sympathetic look (she did not deserve) before Bratty nudged Catty with her elbow.

“Oh. Y’know, we heard from Shyren’s agent that she’s thinking of putting on a benefit concert.”

“Get the funds to help out her sister, y’know.”

“No, I- She doesn’t need to do that. The royal coffers are… more than enough.” Alphys stared at her feet in the puddles on Waterfall’s muddy ground.

“Oh. Well…”

The silence stretched too long as Alphys felt Bratty’s and Catty’s expectant gazes on her. “I promise I’ll hang out soon, alright? I just have… stuff.”

“Royal scientist stuff.”

“Boyfriend stuff.”

Nightmare had recaptured their attention.

Bratty squinted at him. “’Kay, so. Don’t take this the wrong way, but you kinda remind me of the guy who does that awful stand-up at the MTT resort.”

“The snowdrake?” asked Catty.

“Nah, the snowdrake’s only gotten not funny after his wife fell down and his kid ran away. I mean the-“

“Snowy ran away?” Alphys asked. She knew who had become Crystal Lattice, and the few coherent words that amalgamate spoke.

“Yeah.”

“You didn’t know?”

Alphys shook her head.

Bratty pursed her lips. “The Underground’s not that big a place. They’ll turn up alright.”

“Yeah! Don’t worry, Alphys! You didn’t do anything.”

Alphys flinched again.

“Think it’s family trouble.”

“Yeah. They’ve got, like, different styles of humor.”

“Like the other guy at MTT.”

“Right, the skeleton.” Catty looked back to Nightmare. “Y’know, you do kinda look like him. I think. We never really get a good look at him, though.”

Nightmare turned his sphinxlike grin on her. “So I’ve been told.” Before either of her friends could cut in again, he said, “Dr Alphys, a word in private?”

A chorus of squeals and wolf whistles came from the cat and gator.

“We’ll let you get back to your date, Alphys!”

“Yeah, see you around, Alphys!”

A shower of giggles chased them. As soon as they left earshot, Nightmare asked, “They offered you an out. Why didn’t you take it? The claim you’re seeing someone, lack of funds… Both would take some blame off you, and give you readymade excuses for future use.”

“Oh, I - I-“ Alphys fretted with her hands. “It wouldn’t be f-fair to them. To lie like that.”

“You have no problems lying to cover up faults.”

He had spoken so bluntly that Alphys cringed. “Yeah, but this would be… Shyren’s afraid to sing publicly, I wouldn’t want to force her to do that! And the boyfriend thing. It’s…” Alphys didn’t know how to begin phrasing her mishmash of feelings about that. “It’s just… not true. And not telling the truth…” She was thinking of Snowy. “My mistakes are ruining lives!”

“Why not lean into it?” asked Nightmare. “Be the coward. Rise by dragging others beneath you. Steal their work. Claim their achievements as your own.”

“Oh, I couldn’t! That’s terrible!” Alphys didn’t know how to respond and was reduced to spluttering clichés.

“Join me,” hissed Nightmare. He grabbed her hands. “Come with me, and crush worlds by my side. If you can do nothing but make mistakes that drag others down, embrace that! Spread pain and misery, chaos and destruction. Watch them choke on their dust as it coats the winding caverns.”

“You mean… metaphorically, right?” said Alphys. Nightmare’s single eyelight was very intense. His sludgy hands were warm on hers. It was… such a strange feeling to have someone praise even her mistakes - would adore even her mistakes.

“I’ve been meaning to break our dependence on Sci,” Nightmare was saying, almost to himself. “You can be our scientist - royal scientist, even. You can keep your title. Come back to my castle. Leave these people and your mistakes behind. Serve me, or feed me. I will love you either way.”

Alphys's breath hitched. She felt very warm - almost an elation inside her. Like the terror of revealing the truth, but entirely without fear. What Nightmare was promising her, it would be an adventure, practically her own isekai! it would be…

She thought about the snowdrakes, and Shyren, and Asgore, and Undyne… Bratty and Catty… Mettaton and his new body… everyone she had failed.

It would be cowardice.

“I-it would be a big change. I need to think it over-” scrambled Alphys. Even in refusing, she was taking the cowardly way out. Such a liar.

“Alphys. Look at me.”

She did, and Nightmare had a hand on her chin and drew her into a kiss.

Alphys had a moment of Wait-! Real date???, a wonder how he was managing to kiss her without lips, and a smidge of residual guilt before her thoughts scrambled completely into mental keysmash.

When they finally broke apart, Nightmare only said, “Take as much time as necessary.”

The atmosphere was awkward when they returned to the lab. Alphys wanted to apologize, but she didn’t know what for, and Nightmare didn’t like apologies anyway. She busied herself with one of the junker phones and returned to Nightmare with the magic sensor ready for calibration.

He eyed the device thoughtfully. “I should wear this when you start up the portal tomorrow.”

Right. She needed to juice the cables overnight if she wanted to run the machine. She hadn’t done it yet, partially because of their abrupt date, and partially because it didn’t seem necessary since Nightmare would send himself home.

“S-so, that’s when you’ll leave,” Alphys muttered. She clicked her claws together.

Nightmare frowned. “Mm, yes I really should let the castle know. Certain someones’ll rend universes to shreds trying to find me if I don’t mollify their concerns.”

“The machine saves the coordinates, so the portal should open to the same place in space-time you were pulled from,” said Alphys. “Um. And do whatever other processes onto that place it did to you, so maybe it’s better to wait. B-but I don’t want to make you feel like you need to stay here!” Time was running out to get her answer to Nightmare, and… She knew what the right answer would be, and she dreaded saying it.

“Certainly,” said Nightmare. “I do want to figure out how this portal works, and why it takes away my abilities in this way.”

It would be nice if he could come back so they could figure this out together.

A realization abruptly struck Alphys. “This… It’s not goodbye. You can come back here any time you like?”

“I can.”

“Then…” Alphys breathed in and out. “C-come back in a week. I’ll have your answer then. I have… responsibilities. It would be… unfair of me to shirk them.” And if everyone did hate her, and Mettaton did leave her, and she was fired as royal scientist, then...

Alphys let herself breathe. Nightmare would love her regardless. She could do this.

Alphys was working on the last few touches on the portal machine when she heard Nightmare mutter, “You wouldn’t accept a role of conqueror queen.”

"Heh, um. I didn’t hear that?” Alphys pulled off her PPE.

“You suffer when others are in pain,” he said instead, still mostly to himself, still staring at her.

“Yeah, I mean. Doesn’t everyone?” She recalled that Nightmare fed on negative emotions, but surely that didn’t mean he enjoyed the suffering of others, right?

Nightmare continued to fix her in his stare. “Pain through your own mishaps, eating at you, sustaining itself…  World-rending havoc is not the only form negativity can take, and it lingers. Retribution and, well, tantrums (if I may be honest with myself) can blind one to the truth.” He chuckled to himself. “I’ve been gorging myself on junk food, haven’t I? Delicacies do tend to be lighter.” Now he was eying her with fondness. “You are right. A week apart, to get out respective households in order, and then I will have your answer.”

“I think I missed something?”

“You have reminded me of something I’d forgotten, that is all.” He held out a hand. “Give the orders, Dr Alphys.”