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The metal of the bridge creaked underneath her feet as her fingers scrabbled for purchase on the slick iron. Rust stained tears of rainwater matched the streaks running from her eyes as she climbed higher. A further burst of effort and she hauled herself onto the access gantry to look across the bay. Port Mobius was slate grey under the storm wracked sky. The only colour a container ship being unloaded, drawing her eye to the swirling water beneath, so very far below.
Shivering as much from fear as from the biting cold, she removed and carefully folded her coat, the rain plastering her shirt to her fur. Shoes were next, carefully laid on top of the coat. As she walked to the edge she felt the bulge of a familiar package in her shirt pocket. The small bottle of antipsychotic medication was extracted and tossed unceremoniously into the air. It was lost in an instant in the swirling storm. Beneath, there was the sound of cars pulling up, their pleading to her made unintelligible by the howling wind.
A step to the edge...
*Alice*
The voice echoed in her head with the clarity of a church organ. She stumbled backwards and fell onto her backside. Choking back a sob she tried to force the voice from her head.
“NO! You won’t stop me; you’ve been in my head my whole life!”
She struggled back up and made another move do the edge.
*Alice*
Alice screamed and fell back again, curling into a ball and clutching her head with her hands.
“Leave me alone!” She sobbed.
The voice became quieter but took on a tone like honeyed oil. *No, you were simply hearing that which others cannot.*
“Miss! Miss, are you ok?” A Police officer was scaling the bridge beneath her. *I hope she doesn’t jump she’s too young to die.*
*The voice within.* The voice came again. *I can teach you to use it, give you a far greater life, make up for your suffering.*
“No. No. Not real. Not real.” She sobbed as she lay clutching her head.
*There’s nothing more real.*
There was the sound of the officer reaching the gantry.
*Slow and careful, slow and careful, don’t want to scare her.* She heard his thoughts as she approached.
She was paralysed with despair, unable to bring herself to move.
“There we are.” She was grabbed securely, going limp. “You’re safe now.”
Daniel Ferguson, state psychiatrist, rushed up the steps, late as usual.
“What’s today Helga?” He asked the receptionist, hanging up his dripping raincoat.
“Virst of all, hyou are hlate.” The arctic fox growled. “Second, jumper in room zhree. Alice Vilson.
Pumped on cheap pills from Zchildhoodt. Usual type.”
Daniel finished squeezing as much water as possible out of his fur.
“Wonderful, the variety of this place thrills me.”
Before the receptionist could reply with one of her usual caustic comebacks he swept past her to the cell block. The guard was already standing by the cell door as he approached.
“Quiet one this. Just sat in the corner staring at the wall.” He gestured through the one way glass set into the door. The padded cell was brightly lit and denuded of any furniture. “Tom’s bringing some chairs and the case file up; you go in and get started.”
“Alright then.” He replied as the guard unlocked the door.
Alice sat in the one piece hospital garment, her chin on her knees. She was a young Tabby cat, early to mid teens. It was hard to tell behind the years of medication.
“Hello Alice, my name is Daniel.” He pitched his tone levelly to her. There was a faint noise from behind as another guard brought two folding chairs and a box file. “Would you like a seat?”
“I want a drink. A can from the machine down the hall please. The water here tastes like frog sweat.”
Slightly taken off guard by the lucidity of the request Daniel hesitated. “Er.. Certainly. Tom, would you mind?” He dug out a coin and pressed it into the guard’s hand. The guard rolled his eyes and slipped away.
He set up the chairs and ran his eyes over the case file. As the receptionist had said it was the usual tragic case. Alice stood up and stared at him, less usual. Her stare was firm and hard, not the flinching and downcast eyes of the usual jumper. She took the chair opposite of his, looking him in the eye.
“There’s nothing unexpected in there. I’m just your usual sad case if you read that.”
“I’m sure that’s not true.”
“Hearing voices from the age of six, family breakup, care system. The Usual.”
“It saves starting right from the beginning at least.”
“The Doctors I had, when I was able to see one, wouldn’t believe that the medication was ineffective. I kept hearing the voices; it just garbled them and made them worse.”
They were interrupted as Alice’s drink was brought in. She clicked the ring pull open and took a long pull.
“Thank you.”
“It is true that the state care system has a tendency to use a one size fits all policy.”
“I think it’s just my brain’s way of telling me what I notice subconsciously. They’re telling me things about you now.”
“Oh really? What do they say?”
“Your full name is Daniel Ferguson. You’re an employee of the state. You wore a full length raincoat today. You were late, but that is normal. You have a receptionist called Helga.”
“But? How did you?”
“I saw a tag in your jacket collar. Dry cleaning at a discount rate, a perk of the state employee. It had your name on too; I caught the F and the Son and guessed Ferguson at the length. Your face is damp but your jacket and upper legs are dry, raincoat, but the splashes of road grime indicate you were running. The attitude of the guard indicated that lateness was commonplace for you.”
“I must admit I’m impressed, but you forgot the receptionist.”
“I came in the same door you did and she logged me in.”
“And I suppose she was..”
“Memorable, yes.” She interrupted. “Look, can you just let me know what the procedure is. I know what it would be if I was still legally a child, but I’m not. I’m sick of the institutionalisation I’m being put through. I want to try and lead a normal life, get some qualifications, do something useful instead of being a total waste.”
“Well...” He cleared his throat. “You get an assessment from me that goes in front of a panel. They then decide the best course of treatment.”
“Please, I don’t want any more pills. Just let me go somewhere where I can stuff my Brain’s mouth with knowledge so it stops wittering.”
She looked at him pleadingly as his eyes quickly scanned her file. It was open at a page where someone had circled the phrase ‘often found in the library’ in red ink.
“You feel safe in a library?” He asked, then bit his tongue realising his mistake in making the question too specific.
“Oh yes, it was always quiet and warm. And it has the thoughts of so many people preserved forever.” A faraway look came into her eyes.
“I see...” He paused as he quickly flicked through the notes. There was a conspicuous absence of the standard state IQ tests that were compulsory for school pupils to take.
“You’re looking for my standard test results.” Alice stated. “There aren’t any. Too many grinding slow wheels of bureaucracy.”
“Would you feel up to taking the test now? I can get a paper for you.”
“Something to pass the time you mean. Oh why not. You can watch me do it and finish your assessment at the same time.”
“Well it takes an hour and there are other questions I’d like to ask.”
She waved a hand at him in mild irritation. “Yes, yes, the paperwork.”
“Surely these numbers can’t be right?” The bulldog jabbed a meaty digit at the offending number scribbled on the test sheet.
“Look, Helga sent the paper down just after I finished the interview.” Daniel leant back in his chair.
“You know she wouldn’t fix anything like this.”
“Tell me about it, she practically cuts my balls off if I’m an hour late with my expenses.” A well chewed coffee stirrer agitated its way from finger to finger.
“At least you don’t have to worry about the ashtray cleaning anymore.”
“Nah, just damn pneumonia from our fine weather.” The stirrer was pointedly put down. “So our little jumper has a stratospheric IQ eh... It’s not the first time a haunted genius has tried to kill themselves.”
“I checked the records, barely any schooling and no evidence beforehand, probably why it didn’t get picked up.”
“And on enough tranqs to kill a horse, I do read these damn things you know.” His report was waved at him.
“So we need to take her off the medication and find an alternative course of treatment.”
“Good luck getting that. I can recommend anything I like but the finance board will only go for bulk drugs or incarceration at the moment.”
Daniel rummaged in his pocket for a moment and pulled out a crumpled leaflet with a mock flourish.
“I was thinking we could send her here.”
The dog picked up the coffee stirrer again and started chewing it as he read.
“Llewellyn Memorial school..” The leaflet was quickly flicked over. “This place costs eight thousand
Mobiums a term.” He added with a raised eyebrow. “Even the director couldn’t send his kids here.”
Daniel rolled his eyes. “There’s a section on scholarships and grants. But more to the point, I saw the Rector on a panel show a few weeks back. He’s very supportive of the whole test regime. I reckon he’d jump at the chance to get his hands on a certified genius barely touched by the educational system.”
“So, formally speaking, you’d get him to give Alice a place for free and act in loco for her?”
“That’s pretty much it yeah.”
“Well, free sounds even better to the review board than cheap. I’ll check when the review is booked.”
A large desk ledger was consulted.
“You’ve got a week to agree it in principle.”
Alice tried to make herself comfortable on the floor of the cell.
“Did... Did I do well?” The confidence in her voice earlier was gone.
The cell was still empty.
*You did wonderfully my child.* The voice was sibilant in her head. *All you needed was the confidence to use that mind of yours.*
She chewed the edge of her hospital garment.
“But.. I didn’t feel, feel like it was me.”
*Hush Child, there’s no need to speak, I can hear everything you think. I was just letting you tap into those parts of your brain you’ve never used.*
The voice paused for a moment.
*You may call me Mistress, Alice. I will look after you as one of my own, but you must always obey.*
Alice wrung her hands in the thin cotton of her gown.
*Obedience will give you what you have always desired.*
“Rector’s office, may I ask who is calling?” Came the voice of the overly educated secretary down the irritatingly crackly line.
“Hello, yes, it’s Dr David Ferguson here. I called earlier in the week about the Wilson girl case. You said that Professor Anderson would be able to take calls today.”
“Yes Dr Ferguson. I’ll see if Professor Anderson is available.” There was a faint click and some irritating hold music began to play.
Daniel held the phone away from his ear. It had taken most of his allocated week to even get this far. The phone clicked again.
“Hello Dr Ferguson?”
“Yes hello.” He replied.
“Professor Anderson has some time between engagements now. He’s looked over your fax and is willing to speak with you about it. I’ll put you through now.”
“Great; thank you.” Daniel tried not to make the relief in his voice too apparent.
“John Anderson here.” Came the rich voice at the end of the phone.
“Hello Professor Anderson; it’s Daniel Ferguson here. Your secretary said she had passed on details of the Wilson girl to you.”
“Please Daniel, call me John. Yes, it is quite an interesting proposal, an uneducated girl with an IQ off the scale. I have had a quick talk with the board of governors and they are enthusiastic; as am I.” “That’s great.”
“It would of course be dependent on a further IQ test, a set of guarantees from the State and a personal interview with Alice.”
“But of course, could you have the list of requirements by tomorrow?”
“Absolutely, I’ll have them sent out as soon as possible.”
Alice fidgeted in her new uniform as the Taxi rolled down the gravel driveway. “Stop fussing, you look fine.” Dr Ferguson was sat next to her.
“You can’t blame me for being worried. I’ve never been to anywhere like this.”
“Neither have I. They’ve even got topiary on the fruit trees.”
Alice giggled.
“This is a great chance for you Alice. The beginnings of a new life.”
The taxi crunched to a halt.
“Okay.” Alice took a deep breath. “A few days to get used to the place before the other pupils arrive.
I can do it.”
“That’s right, you can do it.” Came the reply as she opened the door. “I believe in you.”
*Belief? Belief is for the weak.* The Mistress’s voice cut through her thoughts. *Knowledge is greater. And I know you can.*
Strangely enough the statement felt oddly reassuring as Alice walked up the driveway to her new life.