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"How was the show?" Josh leans his head back against the couch, and Finley takes the opportunity to shove his nose into Josh's face and start licking him enthusiastically.
"Finn! Hiii, puppy," Ian coos.
Josh laughs. "Yeah, he's always gonna win out, huh?"
"Mm, maybe." Ian turns away from the camera to cough.
Kate comes around the back of the couch to get in frame as well. "Hi, Ian."
"Kate!" Ian's eyes light up, but his voice wavers a little bit when he says, "Ah, I miss you guys."
"We miss you too." Kate tips her head against Josh's and frowns a little. "You okay? You look really tired."
"Yeah." Ian rolls his shoulders and grimaces. "I dunno. I used to be better at sleeping in motels. Or tour buses, god."
"Or that frickin' van?" Josh raises his eyebrows.
"I do not miss that," Ian agrees, and turns aside to cough again.
The stove timer beeps, and Kate sits back up. "Ah, I've got to get that. Take care of yourself, okay?"
Ian nods, still coughing, and waves as she heads for the kitchen.
"Ian," Josh says, in a way that's synonymous with oh, buddy.
"I'm okay." He's sounding kind of hoarse. "It was loud at the bar."
"Hmm."
Ian scrunches up his nose, then scrubs at it with his fist, but he can't stop it when his breath catches and builds into a strong h'ET-schiew! "Oh," he mutters, scrubbing at his nose some more. "Fuck."
"Bless you."
Ian groans and lets himself fall sideways onto the pillows of his motel bed.
"I have to play tomorrow." Now that he's started, he can't stop sniffling.
"Not if you're sick, you don't."
"Not sick," he says, but it's more of a pout than anything.
"It's not like before," Josh says gently, running a hand through Finley's fur. They'd played through all kinds of shit. Before. He wonders if it'll ever go back to being like that, or if this is just how it's going to be from now on.
"I know." Ian scrubs at his nose with the flat of his palm. "I just…" He shakes his head, not meeting Josh's eyes through the phone.
Josh gives him a minute. "Yeah?"
"I just thought we'd all be here together." His sniffle this time is emotion as much as illness. "I mean, not here in this motel playing at some random bar. But like." He bites his lip. "Here."
"I know." They'd been working on it, slowly and uncertainly. And then the whole world had shut down. He wants to tell Ian that it'll happen, that they can try again at trying again, even after all this time. There are just too many unknowns. The state of the world, for one. And the fact that they've all got stuff going again. Danny's producing out in Oakland. Lauren's started streaming online, sometimes music and sometimes video games and sometimes just talking about whatever's on her mind. Nate and Ellie are having another baby. Josh had moved his guitar lessons to Zoom and for the most part kept them there, and the idea of leaving the safety of his life with Kate and Finn to go back out on the road seems too overwhelming to even think about right now.
Ian, though. Ian's never been good at staying in one place. He'd gone back to touring as soon as it was reasonably safe. He's happier now, for sure, but sometimes just as lonely as when he'd been stuck in his apartment. More so, given how many roommates he'd been squeezed in with at the time.
"Hey," Josh says, gentle. "Tell me about the show."
That gets him a little bit of a smile. "It was good." He swipes at his nose with the back of his hand. "There were these girls who drove three hours to come."
"Wow."
"Yeah. And I wrote some new stuff." He shrugs, suddenly shy. "It went over pretty good."
"Send it to me, I want to hear it." For so long, Josh would've been there, in the hotel room and the tour bus, hearing the song come together bit by bit, rather than hearing about it after the fact.
"Okay." It's just a whisper. There are tears in Ian's eyes. Finn whines at the phone and tries to lick the screen.
"You're getting puppy kisses from Finley."
"Thanks, Finn." He sniffs, and coughs, and rubs at his forehead.
"How're you feeling? Seriously," he adds, when it looks like Ian's going to say he's fine.
Ian shrugs. "Like I'm getting sick." He coughs again. "I don't know. My head hurts. And my throat."
"Do you feel like you have a fever?" If he does, it's low. He's not glassy-eyed and rosy-cheeked, he's just exhausted and sniffly and sad. Past experience says he's hanging out somewhere right around the tipping point between warm and feverish.
Ian considers for a second, and then shivers. "I'm kinda cold. A little achy, maybe."
"Get under the covers."
"It's too early to go to…hhh…k'TCHHH! to go to sleep." He wriggles around anyway until the comforter's pulled up to his chin. He absentmindedly wipes his nose on it and Josh flinches.
"You're the reason I don't trust hotel sheets."
"Oh. Sohhh… h'NGT!choo…" Caught in the bedding again. He doesn't finish the apology, just sort of stares into the middle distance past the phone.
"Bless you." Josh sighs. "Okay, who's letting tomorrow's venue know you're out, you or me?"
"No," Ian says, voice wavering again.
"Yes." This move from Ian like he's pushing his forehead into his pillows, and Josh knows that if Ian were here he'd be doing that move against Josh's shoulder right now. "I can do it. The info's in your business email?" Josh has had access for years, but it's been a while since he needed to step in.
Ian nods miserably.
"And we need to get you a test— yes, even if you're sure that's not what this is— and some groceries, and meds, some nice tissues. And extend your motel reservation."
Kate's been listening from the kitchen, and she comes to sit on the couch with Josh and Finley. "We've got it, Ian. Text me your grocery requests."
"I'll do the reservation at the same time I call the venue," Josh says. It's the sort of thing that would have sent him anxiety-spiraling five years ago. Now, here at home with Kate and Finn, it feels easy. An act of love.
"I can't." Ian's shaking a little bit, now; exhaustion and frustration and that little bit of fever.
"It's okay." Kate's voice is reassuring. "Having to cancel for being even just a little sick is just part of the deal now. Everyone will understand."
The kitchen timer goes off again and Kate gets up to turn off the stove and put the finishing touches on dinner.
"We'll work on all that," Josh says. "Call me back in an hour or two if you want."
"Okay." Now that he's under the covers, his eyes are starting to close.
"I think Lauren's streaming tonight, so if you can't get her on the phone you can always show up in the chat."
Ian laughs at that. It turns into a cough. "Everyone always freaks out when I do that."
"The best medicine." For Ian, it really is. He needs attention the way a plant needs water and sunlight. It's not an insult, it's just the truth: he wilts and fades without it, and when he gets it again, he straightens up. Fills out. Comes back to life.
"Hmm." Ian's already perking up a little bit at the thought. "I guess I could do that."
"Good." More screen kisses from Finn. "Finley says he loves you. Talk to you soon."
"Okay." A small but genuine smile. "Thanks, Josh."
He smiles back. "Any time."