Work Text:
Sleep is supposed to help. But how can it help if it’s not working?
Marinette rolls over in bed and reads the clock on the wall.
02:00 AM.
She sighs, exhausted both from waking up and from not being able to sleep. It’s been difficult these days.
Ever since Shadow Moth or Monarch (or whatever the hell his name is now) took all the Miraculous jewels, she’s been constantly on edge. It was supposed to be her job to protect the powers of the miracle box, but she had made a fateful mistake when she trusted Adrien’s cousin Felix. And even though Monarch now had all of the other jewels (along with their kwamis), she knew he was still after Tikki.
Tikki was really the only little being she didn’t have to hide anything from. Marinette couldn’t bear the thought of losing her, too. Her room was lonely enough from the loss of the kwamis, to whom she had grown very attached.
Of course, being on edge meant she was always anxious about when Monarch would strike. Marinette knew that he would stoop to any level to take her kwami. This, in turn, led to lack of sleep and horrifying thoughts.
I guess no sleep is better than a night terror, she thinks sullenly.
She tries unsuccessfully to go back to sleep. After what feels like forever, she checks the clock again, but it’s only been ten minutes. She wishes she could talk to one of her friends, but there’s no way any of them would be up at this hour.
Marinette wishes that she wasn’t up at this hour.
It probably wouldn’t hurt to check.
She turns around and gently reaches onto the shelf for her phone, careful not to wake her sleeping kwami. Tikki looks so peaceful, and Marinette is indeed a little bit jealous.
She scrolls through her messages app, looking for a sign of life. There seems to be no one, until a small symbol catches her eye.
Adrien? Why is he active right now?
It could possibly be a fluke. She could just be hallucinating. Or he could actually be awake, just like she is.
She decides to try and contact him. It feels easier than falling asleep.
Marinette:
hey
are you up?
After a few minutes, a text pops up from Adrien.
Adrien:
Unfortunately, yes, my father has me doing something for him and it’s taking a lot longer than I would’ve liked.
Marinette:
oh i’m sorry, i won’t disturb you then! i’ll let you get back to it.
Marinette is about to put her phone down when she sees another text pop up.
Adrien:
No, that’s fine! I wasn’t getting much done anyway. I’ve been staring at this for a while and I needed a break anyway.
What are you doing up? I’m sure you’ve seen the time.
She isn’t quite sure how to respond, which is strange, because she knows exactly why she’s awake. But she doesn't think it wise to tell him the truth. He can’t know about the stolen kwamis. He can’t know that she’s terrified of Monarch’s plans. And above all, he cannot know that she’s Ladybug.
Marinette:
i’ve been stressed lately and i can’t sleep, but it’s not a big deal, she writes, which technically isn’t a lie.
The response from Adrien comes quickly: I’m sorry to hear that. I know the feeling and it’s the worst. Do you want to talk about it?
Marinette hesitates for a minute, and then cautiously tells him whatever she can.
Marinette:
it just seems like i have way more on my plate than i did last year. and this anxiety/insomnia is definitely not helping.
sometimes i think about the future and it’s so unnerving. i feel like i’m not in control at all, and i wish i could fix that.
There’s a silence for a short time, and she hopes that she didn’t dump too much on him.
Adrien:
I understand you, comes his reply. The past year has been hard on me, too. I don’t really tell anyone this, but I’m also scared of the future. You never really know what’s going to happen until it happens, and sometimes it’s the one thing you didn’t want to happen.
It’s exactly that, she thinks to herself. Even through a phone, Adrien reads her perfectly.
Marinette:
i just wish things could be easier.
Adrien:
Right there with you on that one.
Forgive me for possibly intruding, but have you ever thought about talking to someone about this?
Marinette:
like a therapist?
Adrien:
Essentially, yes. I’ve been thinking about going to see one more often lately. I also think they might do a better job at helping you than I might.
Marinette:
hey, don’t undermine yourself. for a 2 am talk, it’s pretty good!
She laughs softly and hopes her little joke made both of them feel better.
Marinette:
but seriously, I haven’t actually thought about it before. maybe I should look into it.
Adrien:
I think that would be good. I’m not quite sure how it would work but I guess we could figure that out.
Anyway, we should probably get to sleep, it’s almost 3 am!
Marinette:
school is not going to be kind to us for being up this late :’)
Adrien:
Well, at least we made something good out of part of the night.
Do you maybe talk about this more tomorrow at school if we have time?
Marinette freezes for a moment. Anyone who knows her knows that she normally isn’t very good at forming coherent sentences around Adrien. But there’s always room for improvement. Besides, she really does want to talk to him, and there are things that may be hard to understand over text.
Marinette:
i’d like that. maybe in the library during our break period?
Adrien:
Sounds good. See you at school. Good night :)
Marinette:
good night <3
She lays her phone on her chest and sighs contentedly. Her problems aren’t gone, but for the first time in a while, she doesn’t feel so trapped. She hopes that she can help Adrien just as much as he’s helped her.
Marinette puts her phone away and her eyelids grow heavy, finally ready to be taken to sleep. She looks one last time at her sleeping kwami and secretly vows to never let anything happen to her.
The moon is softly shining. Her head hits the pillow, and there’s finally a moment of peace.