Chapter Text
Footsteps treading on the damp sand were the first sound that had been made on Bad Wolf Bay since those three little words were whispered from his mouth and into her ear. But Rose and the Human-Timelord Metacrisis were too occupied to notice them. They were too tightly wrapped around each other, too intrigued by the taste of one another’s lips to focus on anything else other than their own embrace. This kiss was something that they had both desperately desired so there wasn’t much that could distract them to the point of breaking away from this long-awaited moment.
Then came the creaking sound of the TARDIS door closing. Rose was the first to pull away.
The Human Doctor took a second to gather his thoughts before realising what was happening outside the terrific bubble that he and Rose had created for themselves only moments ago. The groaning noises of the TARDIS taking off brought them back to reality. Well, the bubble was definitely burst now. Rose had let go of him and tried to run back towards the TARDIS. However, she had to stop in her tracks as it was too late, the time machine was already dematerialising.
Rose stood frozen as the blue box had disappeared, leaving no trace of its presence on the beach. Shock and denial were taking over her body. He’s faded away again, she thought to herself. Why did she let this happen to her a second time? More to the point, why did the Doctor go to the trouble of landing on the same beach, where the worst day of her life took place, just to leave her on her own in the almost exact same way as last time?! Without making good use of the time that he had to say a proper goodbye, and without finishing that all important sentence?! Before she had the time to try to answer those questions herself, Rose felt a warm hand slip into hers. She stretched out her fingers so she could grip onto his hand tightly, and to also allow him to tightly grip onto hers. The presence of his hand reminded her that she wasn’t alone and in fact he did finish that sentence; this part-human, growing-old-at-the-same-time-as-me-Doctor. She turned her head towards him to find him already looking at her. His expression was serious and puzzled with his furrowed brow, like he was hoping to obtain the answers he needed if he focused on her eyes and face for long enough.
In the corner of her eye, Rose noticed Jackie strolling off in the distance. Probably on the phone trying to get hold of Dad, she thought. What would her father think about all this? How long had she been away for? She had no sense time on this beach. How long had the Doctor been holding her hand for? In some way it felt like an eternity. But also felt like no time at all. Did time move differently on Bad Wolf Bay? Or was it just her experience of it? She caught herself getting lost in thought again. Focus, Tyler. She reminded herself. Finally, she built up the courage to speak to the man clinging onto her. “What’re you thinking about?” she uttered, her trembling voice barely reaching above the rustling of the costal breeze.
The Doctor’s expression softened when he realised that she was speaking to him, and she wanted to know what he was thinking.
“You,” he sighed. The feeling one gets when expressing themselves openly was a new and freeing experience to him, like the weight of the universe lifting off chest. He had no reason to hide anything anymore, especially not from Rose. His Rose. With that, he decided he was going to utilise every opportunity to be honest with her. “I was thinking about how you could be feeling about him and Donna leaving without saying goodbye, you’re stuck on this beach again.” As soon as he saw her transfixed on the dematerialising TARDIS, all that crossed his newly created mind was how was she going to react to the Time Lord version of himself walking away from her? “I’m sorry, Rose. I’m so sorry about all this.”
He had started to stroke his thumb over her hand in attempt to comfort her, but it was more of a plea for her to accept him in this human form. The kiss between them was good, great even. But did she really choose him instead the Time Lord? Or was it a spur of the moment reaction from her?
Rose smirked, tears filling up her eyes again. The Doctor’s response was not what she was expecting, it caused her heart flutter, fluttering in the same way it did when he whispered the end of that sentence in her ear.
“S’not your fault,” she whimpered back, gazing up at him, not quite believing the experience of the last few hours had really happened. Did this beach really have to be the place that she experienced so many emotions at once? She wasn’t sure how to feel. Should she be happy that there is a human version of the Doctor holding her hand right now? Or should she be upset that the actual man she fell in love with could never admit how he truly feels about her? Only one way to find out, she thought, sniffing her nose and clearing her throat, “Do you know what he’s thinking? I mean,” she was starting to choke up, “are you two telepathic or something?” She asked with a sense of saddened curiosity in her voice.
The Doctor’s human heart sank a little. Oh no! his talkative mind exclaimed. Rose is starting to reject me, isn’t she? My silent pleading wasn’t as subtle as I had thought, should’ve reigned it in a bit. “Well, n-no.” He stuttered, using his free hand to scratch the back of his head. “Not exactly. The two-way biological metacrisis was between Donna and I, so it’s her that I was intrinsically connected to…” This honesty strategy wasn’t going to work, was it? He’d rather take on another Dalek fleet right now than work how to effectively communicate with humans, despite his efforts to be accepted by Rose.
Rose blinked several times and looked at the sand as a few tears ran down her face. Sadly, not the answer she was hoping for.
The Doctor could sense her curiosity fading, so again tried to use his newfound unrestrained urge to be honest to try to bring her back, “…Buuut,” he shifted his body around, now facing her front-on and leaning his head in towards her, “He is my blueprint. Like I said, we have the same memories and thoughts on everything that happened before the regeneration. So, if you have any questions you wanted to ask him right up to that moment, I promise to do my best to answer them all.” He smiled softly at her, trying to seem less desperate for her approval than his last attempt.
Rose inhaled deeply. All of her questions? So many thoughts were racing around her head. Hold on, did he say he was connected to Donna? Why was he referring to her in the past tense? She was getting distracted, she had more pressing questions for him to answer. There must have been thousands of them that had weighed on her mind since the last time she stood on this beach. “Okay, then,” she inhaled. “If you, I mean, if he wasn’t shot down by a Dalek, needing to regenerate and causing your creation, would he have finished that sentence like I asked him to?”
Blimey, the Doctor thought. How was he going to answer this?