Work Text:
Hanni unlocks the door to her new apartment, dragging her two giant luggages behind her. It’s her third time moving to a new apartment since her parents needed to go back to Australia because of her dad’s work. It doesn’t matter, she doesn’t have a lot of belongings, so it’s not hard to move in and out. She just needed to make good impressions on the new roommate. No spilled milk over the counter, no random talks about animals, no dishes left on the sink, got it. This time, she won’t do anything that can annoy her roommate.
The apartment is smaller than her previous ones, it has a kitchen, but no dining table and a living room with no TV. It’s fine, she can just eat on the coffee table and she has all the animal documentaries in her laptop, she doesn’t need those. At the other side of the room, there is a bathroom and two bedrooms, one of them having the door closed. She walks to the opened room and puts her stuff inside. It’s around the same size with her previous bedroom with a bed, a wardrobe and a desk inside. Good enough, everything is just like what shown in the pictures she received.
Hanni spends the rest of the day unpacking her stuff and buying groceries (cereals and milk) and when she’s all finished, the roommate is still not in the apartment. The landlord told her that the roommate will be coming home late because of school and work, but she expected them to have a short meeting just before Hanni goes to sleep. She’ll just write a note, she guesses, she doesn’t want the roommate to think there was someone opposite of a burglar coming into the apartment.
Hi, it’s your new roommate. I arrived this afternoon but the landlord said you have class and work until late. I’m leaving this note just so you know that it’s not a random person throwing this stuff inside the apartment. Anyway my name is Pham Hanni and I hope we can get along well! – Hanni🐰
The reply to the note comes the next day, Hanni finds it in the afternoon when she’s back from classes. It’s written on a white paper with a black pen, attached to the fridge with the elephant magnet Hanni put there the day before.
Hi Hanni, glad to have you here. I’m Kim Minji, in case the landlord didn’t tell you my name. I’m leaving this note because I usually have work until very late and wake up late too, so I’m not sure if we’ll see each other soon. Anyway this is my number in case of emergency.
XX-XXX-XXXX
Leave me a message so I can have yours too
-Minji
Hanni takes her phone out of her pocket and adds a new contact. Kim Minji, her new roommate, Kim Minji, she will need Hanni’s picture for the contact. She scrolls her gallery and picks a picture of herself to send.
hanni: hi
hanni: minji, right? hope i got the right number
hanni: it’s hanni, i got your note
hanni: [pic attached]
hanni: for the contact picture
Hanni sees the new message in the evening, the banners popping out when she is watching YouTube videos on her bed.
kim minji: Yeah, that’s me
kim minji: You contacted the right number
kim minji: [pic attached]
kim minji: For the contact picture
Pretty .
The roommate is never in the apartment. Well she probably is in the apartment when Hanni wakes up for classes, but the other bedroom door is always still closed, so they never see each other. It isn’t until the weekend around lunch time when Hanni finally sees her from the corner of her eyes, coming out of her bedroom wearing striped pajamas.
“Hi,” greets the roommate, Kim Minji, “What are you watching?”
“Documentary on sea turtles,” Hanni answers, her eyes still on the laptop. It’s currently the most suspenseful part of the documentary, the part where the baby turtles are trying to get themselves to the sea.
Probably realizing that Hanni isn’t gonna say anything soon, Minji stands up from her seat and walks to the kitchen. “I’m gonna cook something, you want some?” she offers from the other side of the room.
Hanni looks up, she still has her cereal, she should be fine. “Nope, I’m good.”
Hanni continues the remaining 20 minutes of the documentary while her roommate does all the sort of things she needs to do. When the documentary is over, Kim Minji is still eating her lunch on the other end of the coffee table. Hanni decides to take the post-it she put on her laptop, listing the stuff she needs to do, and scribble more stuff on it. She needs to pick up her laundry later, and then read a chapter on the vestibular system for her neuroanatomy class on Monday, and then–
“So, how old are you?”
Hanni stops the scribbling. “I’m 19, turning 20 this year. What about you?”
“I turned 20 earlier this year.” They’re about the same age, good. Hanni doesn’t really like it when the roommate is older, they like to act as if they know a lot more than her. “Are you here for college?”
Hanni nods. “I’m studying veterinary science. You?”
“Computer science.”
“Cool,” Hanni comments. She doesn’t know a lot about that stuff, so she just asks the first thing that comes to her mind, “Do you, like, hack stuff or something?”
The roommate chuckles and her eyes disappear for a second, she’s pretty. “No, I don’t,” she says, “Yet, at least. I just started this spring so I’m only studying the basic theory right now.”
Kim Minji is pretty, Hanni thinks, and she looks like a bear.
Even after moving to the new apartment, Hanni likes to keep her life simple. She buys herself a bunch of cereal and milk every Monday and just eats those most of the time. Sometimes, when she craves for something else, she just buys herself some fast food or street food. And she buys Minji some too because she feels like that’s what a good roommate would do. Or maybe because Minji is very pretty, she doesn’t know, who cares.
Their interactions don’t really extend beyond that. Minji is never around on the weekdays and on the weekend, even though they usually see each other during lunch, they don’t really talk other than a few greetings here and there. Hanni doesn’t mind really, she’s fine with the silence, she’s fine with peeking glances at Minji in silence.
The next time they really have a talk since their first meeting is somewhere around a month after Hanni moved in.
“Hanni,” Minji calls suddenly, “Do you eat anything other than cereal?”
Hanni pauses the documentary that’s playing on her laptop and looks up. She does mostly eat cereal but she eats other stuff too, Minji should know, because she buys for her too most of the time. “I buy McDonald’s on the way home sometimes. And fried chicken. And tteokbokki.”
A long sigh can be heard from the kitchen, followed by “I’ll cook for you too.”
Hanni looks at the empty bowl beside her laptop, she just finished eating a while ago. “No, it’s okay, I’m still full.”
Minji ignores her and continues to grab another bowl from the cabinet. “I’ll just make a little bit so you can try. If you like it, I can cook extra for you next time.”
“Okay,” Hanni says, she doesn’t think she can change Minji’s mind anyway.
Minji comes to the coffee table around 30 minutes later with two bowls in her hands. She puts the bowls on the table and pushes one of it in front of Hanni, it was a bowl of soup. Hanni pulls the bowl closer to her and take a spoonful of it.
“Do you like it?” Minji asks.
Hanni nods. “It’s very good.” Minji is very good at cooking.
Minji smiles and she looks very pretty. “I’ll remember to cook for you too every time I cook.”
“What if, what if we go shopping for ingredients together and I pay for it?” Hanni suggests. It’s unfair if Minji has to cook and pay for the ingredients, she thinks. “I mean it’s just fair that I pay if you cook.”
“Sure,” Minji says, tapping her fingers on the table. “Tomorrow afternoon? I can’t do it on the weekdays.”
“Okay,” Hanni replies. Minji is gonna cook for her everyday and they’re going to go shopping together. “Thank you.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
They go to the supermarket and buy ingredients for the whole week the next day and Minji cooks spaghetti with marinara sauce for the two of them after they arrive at the apartment. And it is delicious, Hanni thinks, it’s one of the most delicious things she has ever tasted, or maybe it’s just because Minji cooked it for her . Hanni helps with the dishes and once she puts all the plates and pans on the rack, she asks Minji if she wants to watch a documentary with her. And Minji says yes, so Hanni picks out her favorite one, the penguin documentary with Benedict Cumberbatch as the narrator. The penguins are cute and Benedict Cumberbatch is awesome, Minji should like it.
Minji doesn’t complain about the documentary being boring. Minji doesn’t complain about the fact that Hanni might have accidentally squeezed Minji’s arm when she finds something cute. Minji doesn’t complain, like everyone else does. Minji just sits there, watching the show with Hanni with their shoulders brushing each other’s. It brings Hanni some shivers, she ignores it each time.
The documentary ends two hours later and somehow, Hanni’s head ends up leaning on Minji’s shoulder and she only realizes it when Minji taps on her lap, saying that she needs to leave for work. Hanni lifts her head up and looks at the clock at the corner of her laptop. It’s 9PM right now and Minji leaves for work at this hour?
“You’re leaving for work at this hour?” Minji nods. “What time do you usually come back?”
“Around 5 in the morning,” Minji answers nonchalantly, like it’s normal for people to finish work at that hour.
“Isn’t it dangerous?” Hanni asks, she feels worry building up inside her. What if there are bad people that want to hurt Minji? “Like when you walk home?”
“I’ve always made it safely, thankfully,” Minji says, “And I have pepper spray in my pocket all the time.”
“Okay.” Minji will be safe, she’s sure of that, Minji surely knows how to protect herself. “As long as you are safe.”
But when the door closes on Minji’s back that night, Hanni can’t help but to still worry. Surely Minji has done this hundreds of times before, going back to the apartment early in the morning, that’s why Hanni never sees her on the weekdays. Surely Minji knows it’s safe for her to do this. And yet, Hanni still worries, so she picks up her phone and sends Minji some messages.
hanni: if it makes you feel safer, you can add my number to your emergency list
hanni: i’ll add yours to mine too
hanni: if thats fine
A notification comes 30 minutes later as Hanni is getting herself ready for bed. She quickly opens her phone and sees Minji’s name on it.
kim minji: It’s okay, you can add mine
kim minji: I’ll add yours too
kim minji: Thanks Hanni
Hanni hopes it wasn’t actually necessary.
Ever since then, Hanni has been spending all of her weekends with Minji. Shopping and eating their meals together, Minji even lets Hanni help her with the simple stuff while cooking, like boiling the noodles or cracking the eggs. Minji would even watch documentaries with her too without saying that it’s boring or anything. Hanni gets to know what kind of stuff Minji likes to watch too when she invites her to watch Netflix series like Wednesday and Stranger Things.
Still, Hanni doesn’t get to see Minji a lot on the weekdays, except for maybe one or two times when Minji woke up earlier and Hanni had her early morning class canceled. They send each other texts a lot instead, well Hanni sends the texts mostly, about what she just learned in class, about her favorite animals, and about how good Minji’s cooking is. And Minji always replies excitedly, like she really cares.
And for all of those, Hanni likes Minji.
Hanni likes Minji because Minji would watch animal documentaries with her. Hanni likes Minji because Minji would listen to her endlessly talking about animals. Hanni likes Minji because Minji never complains about anything that Hanni does.
Hanni likes Minji.
Because Minji accepts Hanni for who she is.
And Hanni misses Minji right now because it’s Thursday and she hasn’t seen Minji since Sunday. And while she’s eating the food Minji has cooked for her, all that Hanni could think is how she wishes Minji were here on her side, eating her dinner together with her. So she clicks on Minji’s contact and mindlessly sends some messages.
hanni: i miss you :((
hanni: why do you have to be so busy on weekdays
She really misses Minji.
Hanni types in some more messages, about the cat anatomy she just learned in class, and about lions and tigers and foxes. She just talks about everything because she misses Minji and when she does that, it feels like Minji is closer just a bit, like Hanni is actually with her.
Minji still hasn’t replied even an hour later, but Hanni can see the check showing that Minji has seen it.
Did she cross the line? Was it too pushy?
Maybe she shouldn’t have done that, maybe she should apologize. Hanni picks up her phone and starts typing some apologies. But as she does that, the door to their apartment opens. And Minji is there, standing at the entrance. “You’re home early,” Hanni says, and suddenly Minji is sitting right next to her, wrapping her hand around Hanni’s.
“You said you missed me,” Minji whispers and Hanni can feel her own heart beating faster. “I missed you too.”
With those words said, Hanni can feel warm spreading through her face. She just hopes Minji doesn’t notice.
Since then, Minji comes home almost every evening and each time, Hanni wishes she doesn’t need to leave for work. Each time, Hanni wishes that the moment will last forever. Each time, Hanni wishes that she’s not the only one feeling this way.
To Hanni, Minji is like the sea, always calm and steady. She’s mature, much more mature than Hanni could ever be. She never gets mad, even if Hanni forgets to clean up her mess in the living room sometimes. She never gets annoyed, even when Hanni talks about her favorite orange cat that roams around her campus for hours.
But there’s something that Hanni forgets about the sea and that evening, she finally remembers it. That evening when Minji suddenly bursts into the apartment door, walking straight to her own room, locking the door, ignoring Hanni completely. And Hanni knows that it isn’t because Minji is having a busy week because she’d always tell Hanni about it. Hanni only got to see a glance of Minji’s expression, but she could see the frowned lips.
Hanni thinks Minji is sad and Minji doesn’t tell her about it and Hanni doesn’t know what to do, she’s never been in a position where she has to comfort someone. If it were Hanni, she would go to an animal cafe or rewatch her favorite bear documentary to make herself feel better. But Minji isn’t Hanni and Hanni doesn’t think animal-related things will make Minji feel better, so she does the next thing that can make herself feel better, ordering food for the two of them to eat together.
It’s 5 minutes past 9 PM when the delivery arrives and Hanni knocks on Minji’s door, hoping that Minji will open the door for her.
1 minute.
Hanni just waits.
3 minutes.
Hanni knocks the door once again. Please .
5 minutes and 37 seconds.
Minji opens the door and all Hanni wants to do is to pull her into a hug and tell her that everything is gonna be alright, that she’s here for her. But she doesn’t do it, because even if sometimes she feels like there’s something between them, she still doesn’t want to accidentally pushes Minji away.
“I bought fried chicken and tteokbokki, do you want to eat together?” For some reason, she feels nervous. What if Minji gets mad because she’s ordering food after she promised she would stop? “I know, I know you said that I shouldn’t order food, but I thought, I thought you might be hungry.”
But Minji’s lips lifted up instead. “Sure, let’s eat together,” she says as she grabs Hanni's hand, leading the way to the coffee tabkle.
Hanni doesn’t ask. Because it doesn’t matter why Minji is sad, what matters is that Minji is sad and Hanni will make her feel better. So unlike usual, this time Hanni is the one who prepares and cleans the dishes, even splitting the chopsticks for Minji. When they’re done, they just continue sitting on each other's side, Hanni resting her head on Minji’s shoulder.
And it is warm, even in the silence, it feels warm, just like the sea that feels warmer as the night gets darker, Minji was warm. And sometimes Hanni wonders if there’s a place that can be more comfortable than this.
“Do you know that grizzly bears can run up to 60 km per hour?” Hanni asks, attempting to cheer Minji up, the best way she can.
Minji shakes her head. “Did you watch the bear documentary today?”
“No, I watched the bear one last month, I just memorized that,” Hanni answers. She remembers it because it reminds her of Minji. “You look like a bear, do you know that?” She didn’t mean to say that out loud. Who would like to be called a bear? “I mean like, a cute one, like a teddy bear, not a scary, grumpy one,” she explains. Minji could never be a scary and grumpy bear.
“No one ever told me that.” Yeah, because nobody is weird enough to say it out loud. “What about you, what animal do you look like?”
Hanni hums, she has known the answer to this since forever. “Rabbit, I think. But my childhood friend, Dani. Dani, Danielle, that’s her name, you two should meet.” Oh, if Dani ever comes to Korea she’s definitely gonna make them meet. “She said I look like a kitten too.”
Minji removes Hanni’s head from her shoulder gently and then stares at Hanni’s face one second too long. Hanni hopes her cheeks aren’t doing one of those annoying things where they turn themselves into red. “I think you look more like a rabbit.”
Hanni nods, she knows it. “Right, I thought so too.”
There is a beat of silence before Minji says something again, something Hanni didn’t expect. “I met my ex today.”
“You don’t have to tell me anything.”
“I dated her for 2 years in high school and we broke up after graduation.” For a moment, all Hanni can think about is the word her . “And, and my parents kicked me out because they didn’t like that I’m into girls.”
Minji’s parents are stupid, Hanni thinks as she puts her hand on top of Minji’s, hoping it’ll soothe her a little. “I’m sorry Minji.”
“It’s been almost 2 years and I thought I was already okay.”
Hanni rubs her fingers on the back of Minji’s hand. It’s unfair, she thinks, that a person as kind as Minji had to go through something so awful. She remembers something she heard from before. “Healing isn’t a linear process and maybe, today was one of the lows and that’s okay. You will be okay.” And I will be here until you’re okay .
Hanni feels some weight on her shoulder and she can feel Minji’s breaths brushing her hair. “Thanks, Hanni.”
That night, Hanni realizes something that she has forgotten, that the sea isn’t always calm and quiet, that it has waves raging inside it waiting to spill to the beaches. She just hopes that Minji knows that she’s there for her, ready to calm the waves for her.
So when she’s drifting to sleep in Minji’s chest that night, she lets out the words she has always wanted to say, “I like you.”
And she hears Minji say it back, “I like you too.”
It follows Hanni into her dream.
“Why did you choose to study in Korea?” Minji asks that one Sunday afternoon after they finished eating their lunch together and are now sitting on the sofa, resting their heads on each other’s.
“My parents used to work here, so I decided to continue college here. But they had to move back, that's why I’m on my own now.” Hanni pauses, she remembers how much she hesitated to continue her study here. “I almost decided to go to a uni in Australia, but I’m glad I didn’t.”
“Which one do you like better? Australia or Korea?”
“Here, of course. Australia doesn’t have you,” Hanni replies like it’s obvious. “Also they don’t have snow.”
“You know, I used to hate this country, but now, I think I like it better,” Minji says as she shifts her body forward to look at Hanni better, moving her hand to tuck Hanni’s hair. “Because I met you here. Because now, I have you here.”
It feels warm, when Minji says those words and sometimes, Hanni feels that she’s too lucky, that she’s here, in this moment, having Minji by her side.